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The Path to Success - 2009/7/21

notovny
Dec 13th, 2015
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  3. 16:52:18: <soozelwoozel> http://sleevage.com/the-mothers-of-invention-weasels-ripped-my-flesh/
  4. 16:52:31: <PlaidSquirrel> don't let his enthusiasm give you a big head
  5. 16:52:36: <Lorelei> You may mack on the bride
  6. 16:52:44: <soozelwoozel> Now where's the wedding cake and champers?
  7. 16:52:51: soozelwoozel lurches towards the best man
  8. 16:53:05: <Lorelei> Will you, Surely, accept your new spousal unit with equal ardor?
  9. 16:53:14: <PlaidSquirrel> who is the best man?
  10. 16:53:24: <soozelwoozel> I dunno, but SHOTGUN
  11. 16:53:35: <notovny> I want to know what that story in "Man's Life" was about.
  12. 16:53:52: <Lorelei> heh
  13. 16:54:09: <surelyfunke> oh did he say yes?
  14. 16:54:12: <soozelwoozel> I know right? I wonder if it did actually take place at sea or whether that was just artistic license
  15. 16:54:15: <notovny> Well, more details about weasels ripping flesh, at any rate.
  16. 16:54:16: <surelyfunke> WHERE ARE MY WITNESSES
  17. 16:54:25: <surelyfunke> NOTOVNY AND I HAVE FINALLY MARRIED
  18. 16:54:25: <soozelwoozel> because sea-faring flesh eating weasels would be PURE WIN
  19. 16:54:25: <PlaidSquirrel> he said he guesses so
  20. 16:54:28: <Lorelei> I SAW WHUT U DID THAR
  21. 16:54:32: <surelyfunke> congratulations, you are my fourth spouse!
  22. 16:54:32: Lorelei witnesses
  23. 16:54:35: PlaidSquirrel clap
  24. 16:54:42: soozelwoozel files away the logs for evidence
  25. 16:54:46: <soozelwoozel> :O
  26. 16:54:58: <surelyfunke> now to break the news to assmitten
  27. 16:55:14: <Lorelei> rut row
  28. 16:55:24: <PlaidSquirrel> lol
  29. 16:55:26: <soozelwoozel> Have fun with that
  30. 16:55:38: <PlaidSquirrel> and before you were all "they don't know about each other"
  31. 16:55:40: <surelyfunke> this is the BEST DAY of my life!
  32. 16:55:50: <surelyfunke> yes but. :(
  33. 16:56:00: <Annan> Hm. Using AM straight, without IS, I should set "UseIndieStoneDriver" disabled, right?
  34. 16:56:03: <surelyfunke> well, notovny now knows, but he would rather read comics or something.
  35. 16:56:05: <PlaidSquirrel> this was probably part of an evil sexy plot between assmitten and you
  36. 16:56:11: <soozelwoozel> Now for embarassing and logn speeches
  37. 16:56:42: <soozelwoozel> Best wedding speech I ever heard was at my cousin's wedding. My uncle was so pissed he forgot the name of the bride's child, aka his grandson
  38. 16:56:48: <soozelwoozel> It was pure win
  39. 16:56:49: <surelyfunke> hah!
  40. 16:56:50: <notovny> http://www.arf.ru/Misc/weasels56.html
  41. 16:56:52: <surelyfunke> that's brilliant
  42. 16:57:33: <soozelwoozel> Woah. Gnarly
  43. 16:57:43: soozelwoozel awards notovny 1000 googlefu points
  44. 16:58:06: <notovny> 90 ducks in two nights seems like a lot for twelve weasels.
  45. 16:58:30: <PlaidSquirrel> the 230kb of download nearly killed me!
  46. 16:58:34: <soozelwoozel> Blood lust I guess
  47. 16:58:53: <PlaidSquirrel> almost as dangerous as those evil weasels
  48. 16:59:05: <notovny> Almost four ducks per weasel. They were probably hepped up on goofballs.
  49. 16:59:25: Lorelei sniffs
  50. 16:59:30: <Lorelei> Weddings always make me misty
  51. 16:59:31: <soozelwoozel> four ducks per weasel doesn't sound that outrageous
  52. 17:00:04: <notovny> I don't imagine a weasel can eat four ducks in a night.
  53. 17:00:06: <surelyfunke> those weasels look naughty
  54. 17:00:06: <surelyfunke> naughty weasels
  55. 17:00:55: <soozelwoozel> No, course not notovny
  56. 17:01:06: <notovny> Perhaps there were more weasels, but the others were attending a duck-killing seminar, and only twelve showed up on the third night.
  57. 17:01:09: <Annan> Nobody knows about IS?
  58. 17:01:11: <Annan> :/
  59. 17:01:11: <soozelwoozel> But I assume it's a similar situation to when foxes go a bit mental on bloodlust
  60. 17:01:29: <soozelwoozel> IS?
  61. 17:02:06: <Annan> soozelwoozel, [17:56] <Annan> Hm. Using AM straight, without IS, I should set "UseIndieStoneDriver" disabled, right?
  62. 17:02:13: <PlaidSquirrel> it depends on what the definition of "is" is.
  63. 17:02:28: <Lorelei> settle down, Clinton.
  64. 17:02:29: <Annan> OFFS.
  65. 17:02:40: <soozelwoozel> Oh right. Distracted by weasels and weddings. sozzles. Nah don't know nuffink about it
  66. 17:02:42: <PlaidSquirrel> i couldn't help it
  67. 17:02:43: <notovny> "The path to success? DUCK KILLING! You are a WEASEL! You KILL DUCKS! Say it with me. 'I AM A WEASEL! I KILL DUCKS!'"
  68. 17:03:02: <Lorelei> But I liek ducks. :(
  69. 17:03:04: <soozelwoozel> Just goes to show the effect video games have on susceptible youths
  70. 17:03:16: <PlaidSquirrel> do you weigh the same as a duck?
  71. 17:03:26: <Lorelei> No, not today
  72. 17:03:29: <Lorelei> Maybe tomorrow
  73. 17:03:38: soozelwoozel misses duck hunter
  74. 17:03:42: Pescado kicks and stomps Lorelei.
  75. 17:03:43: <PlaidSquirrel> i'll be keeping my eye on you
  76. 17:03:49: <Lorelei> I'll be good.
  77. 17:03:52: <Lorelei> Mostly.
  78. 17:04:04: <notovny> "'But I like ducks,' I hear you say. Let me tell you a secret about ducks. DUCKS HATE YOU. They sit in their ponds, staring at you with their DEAD DUCK EYES and if they had lips they would be SCOWLING! They are EVIL and they DO NOT WANT YOU TO SUCCEED!"
  79. 17:04:18: <Annan> Yo, Pescado. If no Indie Stone is present, does it matter what I set UseIndieStoneDriver to?
  80. 17:04:52: <Lorelei> Now I am scared of ducks.
  81. 17:04:56: <Lorelei> FANtastic.
  82. 17:04:57: <notovny> How do you succeed? YOU KILL DUCKS! Not one, not three, but FOUR DUCKS PER NIGHT! That is the PATH to SUCCESS as a WEASEL!
  83. 17:04:59: <Pescado> Nope.
  84. 17:05:03: <Pescado> Just leave it alone if you don't have it.
  85. 17:06:28: <surelyfunke> pescado, notovny and i just got married
  86. 17:06:35: <soozelwoozel> Oh brilliant. Yet another waterfowl I now have to tread carefully round
  87. 17:06:43: <Lorelei> It are official and stuff
  88. 17:06:47: <notovny> "But I can't eat four ducks per night," I hear you say. BOLLOCKS. I used to think that. I would look at my little weasel mouth in the mirror and think "Maybe I can eat half a duck." THAT IS WHAT DUCKS WANT YOU TO THINK.
  89. 17:07:53: <soozelwoozel> Right, I'm off to make dindins
  90. 17:08:06: <PlaidSquirrel> are you having duck?
  91. 17:08:30: <notovny> "But there's a poultry farmer, and he won't like me killing his ducks" I hear you say. You know what else he won't like? He won't like it when you RIP HIS FLESH because you are a DUCK KILLING WEASEL SUCCESS MACHINE!
  92. 17:10:15: <Lorelei> Ducks clearly put the "fowl" in "waterfowl."
  93. 17:10:35: <notovny> Hmm. I've got three minutes left on this library computer, so I guess I'll have to go now.
  94. 17:10:36: <Lorelei> Foul fowls.
  95. 17:11:03: <notovny> Remember the mantra. "I AM A WEASEL. I KILL DUCKS."
  96. 17:11:12: <notovny> For that is the PATH to SUCCESS.
  97. 17:11:43: <Lorelei> All hail Xenu. Oops, wrong brainwashing tape. :(
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