It's been nice knowing you.. well actually, it hasn't
This random kick message was censored by popular request
I recommend you see a therapist
Look, no more lamer ^^
There's the exit, learn it well
This relationship just isn't going to work out
The op is always right
You are frightening our customers, we must ask you to leave
Random Kick Message #13
Excessive lameness detected
Shhh... Be vewy vewy qwiet... I'm hunting lamers...
My foot itches... ahh... much better...
Would you like fries with that?
P.S. This doesn't mean we can't be friends
I'm only doing this because I care
This kick was sponsored in part by Microsoft Combat Boots
It must be a $day $+ ... -sigh-
I'm too lazy to give you a real kick message
Lamer removal successful!
That's gotta hurt!
Boot to the head!
Error processing request, please try again
Go go gadget army boot!
Not enough memory to displ
...and there was much rejoicing...
This is a test of the Emergency IRC Kicking System
My Karma just ran over your Dogma
Look at that lamer fly!
Another one bites the dust...
This is our subtle way of saying goodbye
Thank you please drive through
Don't let the door hit you on your way out
*snap* *crackle* *pop*
*bang bang* you're dead
Did you hear something?
Violence is never a solution, but it can be entertaining
Thank you for NOT smoking!
I know you like it when I do this
Talk to the foot!
Are you feeling lucky?
Are we having fun yet?
I tire of your company. Begone!
I would ask you to leave, but why, when I can force you?
If brains were dynamite, you wouldn't have enough to blow your nose
A few sandwiches short of a picnic, aren't we?
All foam, no beer.
Brains by Mattel.
Couldn't pour water out of a boot with instructions on the heel.
Don't go away mad, just go away!
Everyone is entitled to be stupid but you're abusing the privilege.
Have you ever wondered what life would be like if you had had enough oxygen at birth?
I don't know what your problem is, but I'll bet it's hard to pronounce.
I heard you had an idea once, but it died of loneliness.
I read your mind, and trust me, it was a short story...
I see you've set aside this special time to humiliate yourself in public.
I think, therefore, I am... not related to you.
I would engage you in a battle of wits but I refuse to duel with an unarmed person.
I'd be happy to help you out. What way did you come in?
I'm not your type. I'm not inflatable.
If brains were taxed, he'd get a rebate.
If I was 10 times smarter than you, I'd be a moron!
If I was in a room with you and two werewolves and I had a gun with two silver bullets, I'd shoot you, twice.
If ignorance is bliss, you must be orgasmic.
Inside his head is a little dust particle with a sign that says 'Space for Rent'
It's hard to believe you out-swam a million other sperm.
Jesus loves you, everyone else thinks you're a jerk.
Let's have a suicide pact. You go first.
Not the brightest crayon in the box, now are we?
Not the sharpest tool in the shed, are you?
You are a few fries short of a happy meal.
You are depriving a village somewhere of an idiot.
Some people are going to leave a mark on this world, you might leave a stain.
The engine is running but there's nobody at the wheel.
The lights are on but no one's home.
The proctologist called... they found your head.
Too many freaks, not enough circuses.
Try not to let your mind wander. It is too small to be out by itself.
We're having creative differences. I'm creative, you're different.
When God was giving out brains you thought he said 'trains' and you missed yours.
You have the people skills of a belt sander!
You need to find a quiet corner and have a word with yourself.
You're more unprepared than a vegetarian at a state barbecue.
Your about as slow as a turtle crawling through peanut butter.
Light travels faster than sound. This is why some people appear bright until you hear them speak.
Support your local taxidermist. Get stuffed.
A sharp tongue does not mean you have a keen mind.
Anyone who told you to be yourself couldn't have given you any worse advice.
Are you always this stupid or are you making a special effort today.
Do you want me to accept you as you are, or do you want me to lie to myself and try to like you?
Don't let your mind wander; it's far too small to be let out on its own.
Don't thank me for insulting you; it was a pleasure.
Don't you realize that there are enough people to hate in the world already without you putting in so much effort to give us another?
Grasp your ears firmly and pull; you might just be able to remove your head from you ass.
Your mouth is dirtier than a rubber toilet seat.
I bet you get bullied a lot.
I don't know what makes you so dumb but it really works.
I don't think you are a fool, but what's my opinion compared to that of thousands of others.
I don't want to make a monkey out of you. Why should I take all the credit for the one thing you've done yourself?
I know you are nobody's fool, but maybe someone will adopt you one day.
I like you. People say I've got no taste, but I like you.
I used to think that you were a colossal pain in the neck. Now I have a much lower opinion of you.
I will defend, to your death, my right to my opinion.
I would have liked to insult you, but the sad truth is that you wouldn't understand me.
I'd like to see things from your point of view, but I can't seem to get my head that far up your ass.
If I want shit from you, I'll squeeze your head.
If we killed everybody who hates you, it wouldn't be murder…it would be an apocalypse!
If you were twice as smart as you are now, you'd be absolutely stupid.
I'm busy now. Can I ignore you some other time?
I'm glad to see you're not letting your education get in the way of your ignorance.
I'm impressed, I've never met such a small mind inside such a big head before.
I've come across rotting bodies that are less offensive than you are.
Now we know why some animals eat their own children.
Pardon me, but you're obviously mistaking me for someone who gives a damn.
Please, keep talking. I always yawn when I am interested.
Talk is cheap, but that's ok, so are you.
You are cruelly depriving a village somewhere of an idiot.
There are several people in this world that I find unbearably obnoxious, and you are all of them.
This is an excellent time for you to become a missing person.
What you are lacking in intelligence, you more than make up for in stupidity.
Whatever it is that is eating you, it must be suffering horribly.
What's wrong, don't you get any attention back home?
When I look into your eyes, I see straight through to the back of your head.
You are living proof that manure can sprout legs and walk.
You are not as bad as people say, you are much, much worse.
You are not even beneath my contempt.
You are not obnoxious like so many other people, you are obnoxious in a completely different and far worse way.
You are slower than a herd of turtles stampeding through peanut butter.
You have a nasty speech impediment…your foot.
You have an inferiority complex and it is fully justified.
You should do some soul-searching. You might just find one.
You would never be able to live down to your reputation, but I see you're doing your best.
Your mind isn't so much twisted as badly sprained.
You're a habit I'd like to kick - with both feet.
I'm  looking forward to the pleasure of your company since I haven't had it yet.
When you pass away and people ask me what the cause of your death was, I'll say your stupidity.
I've  had  many  cases  of love that were just infatuation, but this hate I feel for you is the real thing.
You're the best at all you do - and all you do is make people hate you.
Don't you realize that there are enough people to hate in the world already without your working so hard to give us another?
No  one should be punished for accident of birth but you look too much like a wreck not to be.
You  were the answer to a prayer.  Your parents prayed that the world would be made to suffer and here you came along.
You're a habit I'd like to kick; with both feet.
I hear the only place you're ever invited is outside.
I would like the pleasure of your company but it only gives me displeasure.
At  your speed you'd better not stop your mouth too fast or your teeth will fly through your cranium.
If you ever tax your brain, don't charge more than 5 cents.
Don't you have a terribly empty feeling ---- in your skull?
You  have  nothing  to fear from my baser instincts; its my finer ones that tell me to kill you.
It's your life --- but I wish you'd let us have it.
I  don't  consider you a vulture.  I consider you something a vulture would eat.
I  think you should live for the moment.  But after that I doubt I'll think so.
I  believe in respect for the dead; in fact I could only respect you if you WERE dead.
You're acquitting yourself in such a way that no jury ever would.
You have a face only a mother could love - and she hates it!
Sit down, give your mind a rest - it obviously needs it.
Here's 40 cents. Call all your friends and bring back some change!
I don't know what makes you so stupid, but it really works!
Congratulations; you're a perfect argument against brother-sister marriages.
I'll never forget the first time we met -- although, I'll keep trying.
I refuse to engage in a battle of wits, as I will not take advantage of the handicapped.
Don't be ignorant your whole life, take a day off why don't you?
Next time you open your mouth, try to say something interesting.
Save your breath... you'll need it to blow up your date.
If we were to kill everybody who hates you, it wouldn't be murder; it would be genocide!
Any similarity between you and a human is pure coincidence.
You're a habit I'd like to kick -- with both feet.
Did your parents ever ask you to run away from home?
I'd like to see things from your point of view but I can't seem to get my head that far up my ass.
As a failure, you are a tremendous success.
You are down to earth, but not quite far down enough.
If brains were taxed, you would certainly be owed a refund.
Have you considered suing your brains for lack of support?
You are a couple of sandwiches short of a picnic.
If I ever need a brain transplant, I'd choose yours because I'd want a brain that had never been used.
Do you want me to accept you as you are, or do you want me to like you?
Well, they do say opposites attract...so I sincerely hope you meet somebody who is attractive, honest, intelligent, and cultured.
You are not the sharpest knife in the drawer.
You're so poor, burglars break into your house...and leave money.
You must be an experiment in Artificial Stupidity.
Why don't you slip into something more comfortable...like a coma.
Yeah, yeah, keep talking, someday you might say something intelligent.
You are a few clowns short of a circus
You are not the brightest bulb on the Christmas tree
So now we know why some mammals eat their children.
You're not stupid... just possessed by a retarded ghost.
I bet your brain feels as good as new, seeing that you've never used it.
I heard you got a brain transplant and the brain rejected you!
Sure, I've seen people like you before - but I had to pay an admission...
Which village is missing its idiot?
I heard that you changed your mind. So, what did you do with the diaper?
I know one should judge a man by what he really is instead of by appearances, but you are REALLY ugly.
If you were twice as smart, you'd still be stupid.
Keep talking, someday you'll say something intelligent.
Have your parents ever asked you to run away?
Did your sideshow leave town without you?
Everyone has the right to be ugly, but I'm afraid you've abused the privilege.
You started at the bottom...and it's been downhill ever since!
Next time you shave, try standing an inch or two closer to the blade.
You are a day late and a dollar short.
If ignorance is bliss, you must be the happiest person alive.
I don't know what your problem is, but I'll bet it's hard to pronounce.
You have an inferiority complex - and it's fully justified.
Listen, are you always this stupid or are you just making a special effort today?
Whatever anyone says to you goes in one ear and out the other because there is nothing blocking the traffic.
Just out of curiosity, are your parents siblings?
You have the face like a Saint - a Saint Bernard.
You used to be arrogant and obnoxious. Now I see that you are just the opposite - you are obnoxious and arrogant.
The next time you shave, could you stand an inch or two closer to the razor please?
Do you ever wonder what life would be like if you'd had enough oxygen at birth?
You must have gotten up on the wrong side of the cage this morning.
If truth is stranger than fiction, then you must be truth!
We think of you when we are lonely. Then we are content to be alone.
You have a Titanic intellect in a world full of icebergs
Calling you an idiot would be an insult to all the stupid people.
You remind me of the ocean -- you make me sick.
Some drink from the fountain of knowledge, but it looks like this guy just gargled.
Your verbosity is exceeded only by your total stupidity.
Go ahead, tell them everything you know. It'll only take 10 seconds.
You're a habit I'd like to kick; with both feet!!
I know you are nobody's fool, but maybe someone will adopt you.
I'd like to give you a going-away present.....First, you do your part.
You are the kind of a man that you would use as a blueprint to build an idiot.
Do you still love nature, despite what it did to you?
Somebody said to me that you ain't fit to sleep with the pigs. Well, I stuck up for the pigs.


f11 /ban -u3600 # $$1 2 | /kick # $$1  $read(kicks.txt)
f12 /kick # $$1  $read(kicks.txt)