My book report on the cat in the hat

"The Dynamics and Effects of a Psychoanalytic Viewpoint of Transracial Gender Bias and Monological Self-Evaluation in Dr. Suess' 'The Cat in the Hat:' An attack on the Dangerously Deceptive Facades of Today's Youth and how the Anthropomorphization of animals in Modern Media is affecting Age of Death.


This scientific journal is the result of years of tireless research that investigates multiple points, including but not limited to:
   - How reading "The Cat in the Hat" can affect the rate of schizophrenia in offspring
   - How reading "The Cat in the Hat" can potentially cause a substantial increase in average age of death in countries with high TCHR (The Cat in the Hat Reads)
   - How countries with a high TCHR have less female "economic participation, educational attainment, health, and political empowerment."
   - How reading TCH (The Cat in the Hat) can affect one's personal stage of depression.




   Beginning, the World Economic Forum releases The Global Gender Gap Report, based on factors such as "economic participation, educational attainment, health, and political empowerment" of females in a country or territory. In this report, countries with a Global Gender Gap Scale closest to one have the (hypothetical) least gender bias. Studies show that the relationship between TCHR and gender bias is no coincidence. For example, On the report, the United States, a country with a particularly high TCHR came in with a Global Gender Gap Scale of 49, not very good at all. On the other hand, countries like Rwanda with very low TCHR's also had a very low amount of gender bias, with Rwanda clocking in at an incredible 4 on the Global Gender Gap Scale.
   Another thing of note to consider is that many countries with low schizophrenia rates in offspring have very high TCHR. Many other studies have attriubuted this to better medical care, education, and living conditions, but our scientists have discovered that this is undoubtedly due to TCHR. We call this effect the "Psycho-Suess Relationship."
   This is where our researchers found a problem. If you have been paying attention, you will find that both a high TCHR and a low TCHR ellicit negative results. We are currently unable to reveal more information on this phenomenon, which we have dubbed "The Feline-Fedora Reverse Effect," but we believe the solution may lie with Dr. Suess' other prose, most specifically "One Fish, Two Fish, Red Fish, Blue Fish" and "Green Eggs and Ham."
   Additionally, our team has found that average age of death is heavily influenced by TCHR. Again, news media and other journals have attributed this to medical care and living conditions, but our team is almost ready to reveal our information to the public and show the world really all the effects of TCHR and more information of the Feline-Fedora Reverse Effect.
   Lastly, we need to talk about the most pressing issue. Many teens and young adults are having trouble finding their true self, and are in a deep state of chronic depression. One statement in TCH is, "It is fun to have fun." However, many people are wondering to themselves, "If I find myself unable to have fun with my loved ones and even when alone, can I even consider my life fun?" We all need to seriously take a look at ourselves and restablish our self-worth. Even in the darkest situations we need to find something to be happy about. As TCH says, "I know it is wet and the sun is not sunny, but we can have lots of good fun; that is funny."