OvalLawd DCD TTR

https://www.bilibili.com/video/av28925228?from=search&seid=13941174179727874380

>Ainz thinks of a way to make Guardian's think humans aren't completely weak so as not to underestimate them
>Manages to find a TTRPG book while browsing
>Enlists Albedo, Shalltear, Aura, Mare, Demiurge
>Player limit is 5, so Sebas and Cocytus are left out (My guess is that their Karma is positive)
>Explains that humans in this world have skills and talents so they cant be underestimated
>Game is a "Hack and Slash" adventure
>To understand humans you have to play as humans
>Aura:Thief
>Mare:Cleric
>Shalltear:Magic Warrior
>Demi:Mage
>Albedo:Warrior
>Demi heard from Narberal's reports that human warriors they met are trash that don't know any martial arts
>Ainz gets worried and hopes she wasn't talking about him (Momon)
>Aim of the game is to clear the map, there are various conditions to do so
>Since they dont have fatigue items, Demi suggests finding an inn first
>Shalltear wants to rest in a nice big place
[Meant to do a summary, but jokes will be lost. Might redo if I have time again. Dialogue translation continues from here on.]

>Ainz:When you enter a village the first thing you meet is an old man, what do you do?
>Albedo:Kill him
>Ainz:Eh?
>Albedo:Kill him with a greatsword, damage is 6 points
>Ainz:Ehhhhhh? Why kill him?
>Albedo:Of course to secure the area, we should kill all humans who stand in our way
>Aura:So kill anyone we find? Then I'll be going to the right side.
>Shalltear: Leave the left to me
>Ainz:(Right off the bat! Being an observer is different as expected!Ermmm what should I do?)
>Ainz:(If he dies here the story is over!)
>Mare:Hey sis...
>Aura:What Mare? Are you helping me on the right?
>Mare:If we fight and kill the villagers here...can we still win as we are now?
>Ainz:(Nice Mare! All hail the cautious types!)

Ends at 9:45

>Demi:Just as Mare says, we are new adventurers.
>Demi:If we are surrounded by hundreds of villagers we have no way of winning. We don't have all our abilities
>Albedo:You're right, I was subconsciously thinking of our usual ways
>Ainz:(Yes that's no good! As expected of Albedo, quick at changing strategies!)
>Albedo:We should swiftly take over a house and barricade it
>Albedo:Then we have a defensive position to take over the village
>Ainz:(Not that way!)
>Mare:Normally we should just ask them to take us in....
>Albedo:Are you saying we as proud guardians of Nazarick need to lower our heads to humans?
>Albedo:Doing that will shame Ainz sama's great name!
>Aura:Usually that's the case but...aren't we just human adventurers now?
>Albedo:That's true
>Shalltear:It just doesn't sit well with me (I made a chair pun, sorry)
>Demi:Instead of thinking about it as us lowering our heads to humans, treat it as us lowering our heads to Ainz-sama controlling the humans
>Albedo & Shalltear: Ah!
>Albedo & Shalltear: Ainz-sama, please let us in to the room!
>Ainz:The old man nods his head...
>Ainz:Do you want to rent a room? Ok, in exchange I need a favour.
>All: Anything you wish, Ainz-sama!
>Ainz:Ah...wait. That was the old man's line, you don't have to be so respectful. I am the village elder.
>Ainz:In the recent caves there has been goblins causing trouble for us. As payment for the beds, please eliminate them.
>Aura:What? Its just goblins? This will be easy
>Albedo:Of course we accept! Ainz-sama
>Ainz:(Are they even listening?)
>Ainz:Then because you accepted the request, this map is clear.
>Demi:I see, it seems that this game's aim is to clear a certain storyline. That's why there are various clear conditions.
>Shalltear:In other words we should continue the story as fast as possible?
>Demi:Simply put

Ends at 12:25

>Ainz:The next map is a path that leads to the goblins cave, its a wide path.
>Mare:It doesn't seem to have anything suspicious
>Aura:Lets go in to deeper to start!
>Ainz:As you head down the path, suddenly a group of armed men appear. From their appearance they look like bandits.
>Albedo:Ask them what they want from us
>Ainz:[If you value your life surrender all your belongings! First drop your weapons and also your clothes!]
>All:Oh...
>Ainz:(Ah crap! I let my "bandit voice" out bad accident! Wahhh its so embarassing!)
>Ainz:(Its like they're thinking "what's wrong with this guy?"! Shit! Is this level of embarassment not enough to be surpressed?)
>Albedo:Ainz-sama...
>Ainz:Wha..What is it?
>Albedo:Asking us to strip in a place like this...How bold of you!
>Albedo:I prefer if it was just the two of us alone...but if this is what Ainz-sama wishes
>Albedo:I as a succubus will not fail your expectations!
>Ainz:(That was it!?)
>Shalltear:Wait just a minute! That wasn't directed only to Albedo right?
>Demi:In other words...me too? (Looks like Sebas and Demi aren't too different after all)
>Albedo & Shalltear: Eh!?
>Ainz:The bandits! The bandits said it! You guys better not strip! It'll cause several kinds of problems!
>Aura:For now shouldn't we do something about the bandits?
>Mare:That's right...Its probably the condition to clear this map
>Ainz:That's right, lets enter the battle. The fastest person will start first, then the rest will take turns.
>Demi:Ainz-sama, what are the enemies' numbers?
>Ainz:In total 6 men, all with roughly the same equip
>Aura:The fastest person...could that be me?
>Aura:I'll fire an arrow, 4 points of damage but because I used my special skill [Attack Weakness], the opponents defense is lowered by 3 points
>Ainz:Their defence is  1, so after using the skill it becomes zero. Because of that, the bandit takes full 4 points of damage.
>Ainz:As the arrow connects, the bandit lets out a loud cry
>Shalltear:I'm up next, I'll attack another bandit with my broadsword, 4 points of damage. Also, I'll add a fire enchantment to add another 2 points for a total of 6 points of damage.
>Ainz:Minus the 1 def of the bandit, he takes 5 points of damage, the bandit who took it falls with a cry. Now there's 5 bandits left.
>Albedo:I'm next, I'll use my greatsword to do 6 points of damage. That will also do 5 points of damage. The bandit is decapitated, 4 bandits left.
>Shalltear:Eh? 6 points of damage without doing anything? Isn't that unfair?
>Albedo:Its fine isnt it? Because of that I don't have any magic or special skills
>Ainz:Its the bandit's turn, they retaliate by attacking Albedo and Shalltear doing 3 points of damage twice each
>Albedo:With my armour's def I reduce 2 damage, taking 2 points of damage.
>Shalltear:With my def of 1, I take a total of 4 damage.
>Mare:Next is my turn...Should it be better for me to use healing magic?
>Albedo:Its fine, Mare. I still have 20 points of HP.
>Shalltear:High! I'm only at 14 points!
>Albedo:Its because of Ainz-sama's love!
>Shalltear:Ara Ara~ I don't know about that. It may be because a barbaric warrior suits a cow-woman with unnecessarily big cowtits!
>Albedo:You also suit being a magic warrior, needing buffs to power up. Just like a certain someone who stuffs things to increase her bust?
>Shalltear:What did you say!? Wanna fight!?
>Mare:Ermm, I guess healing Shalltear is better..6 points of healing.
>Demi:Ainz-sama, I'll be using [Fire Arrow] magic. 5 points of damage which ignores def.
>Ainz:Getting hit by the magic, the bandit is burnt to a crisp. Now everyone has had a turn. Its back to Aura's turn.
>Aura:Yes! I'm getting used to this game. Lets begin the next attack!

Ends 17:15.

>Albedo:Attack, DMG 6 points
>Ainz:With that the last bandit has been defeated. End of battle, map cleared.
>Mare:Its over...
>Shall:That took quite a while
>Aura:Albedo, how much HP do you have left?
>Albedo:From 20, I'm left with 14. How embarrassing to think we had so much trouble against mere human bandits
>Mare:Erm, should I heal?
>Albedo:Its fine, Mare. I'll leave these wounds as a reminder of that humiliation.
>Demi:Please heal yourself properly. If you fall, it'll be troublesome for us.
>Albedo:Guh!
>Ainz:The fallen enemies have dropped various items. From the bandit's body you find a small gemstone.
>Shall:Gems from mere bandits?
>Albedo:Probably stolen from other travellers. What a vulgar bunch, seriously.
>Aura:Robbing people around this area, what a boring life.
>Demi:Our purpose in life is to serve the Supreme Beings, but humans don't have such a purpose.
>Demi:Just like these bandits, they struggle in their meaningless lives.
>Mare:I see...living without a purpose, how pitiful. (OUCH MARE)
>Ainz:(Stop! Stop hurting Suzuki Satoru's heart!)
>Demi:We should at least make full use of them. Ainz-sama, please let me participate in the looting.
>Ainz:The only drops are the gemstone earlier.
>Demi:I want to loot their skin.
>Ainz:(THATS WHAT YOU WANT TO LOOT!?)
>Shall:What are you using human skin for?
>Demi:After peeling and hardening, I'll turn them to leather equipment
>Mare:If that's of use to anyone, the bandits will rest in peace!
>Ainz:(I think they'll more likely be cursed...")

Ends 19:25

>Ainz:As you continue down the road, you discover a huge lake.
>Aura:Lake? I wonder if there will be an event here?
>Ainz:From the lake you hear someone's voice
>Ainz:[Because of those guys...] [How troubling], you hear such murmurs
>Shall:Maybe someone was attacked by goblins?
>Albedo:We might be able to get some information, I would like to hear more...
>Ainz:As you draw closer, you discover palm-size fairies flying above the water surface
>Aura:Ah, its fairies. Oi~
>Ainz:As you call out to them, the fairies are startled and go into hiding
>Ainz:[Kyaa! Humans! Humans have come!]
>All:Oh...
>Ainz:(I knew it! I knew they would do this again!) *Actual line is I knew it will cause this atmosphere again but it sounds weird*
>Albedo:Ah...Ainz-sama's falsetto!
>Shall:How moving!
>Ainz:(Eh!? You guys liked it? Aren't you being too accepting!?)
>Aura:[What's wrong?] I call out to them.
>Ainz:The fairies are completely afraid, only those with Charisma of 4 and above can talk to them.
>Albedo:Charisma of 4 and above...anyone?
>Demi:Charisma value...is the power of persuasion right? The class which should be high on that is...
>Shall:Cleric Mare is it?
>Mare:Ah, yes, I have 5 points of CHA.
>Aura:Ok! Mare, if you will.
>Mare:Yes. Fairies, I want to talk with you all.
>Ainz:[I have nothing to say to humans!], [Humans are all cruel!]
>Mare:That's not true! Even humans have good points!
>Ainz:[For example? For example?]
>Mare:Ehh, ermm.. ermm...
>Demi:Let me interupt. Their cries of despair are soothing.
>Ainz:(Is....Is that a good point?)
>Demi:Also, they can at least converse. So there is value to torturing them, maybe that's better?
>Shall:Pretty good. Their blood can taste good too in addition.
>Aura:These chracteristics...Fairies probably won't understand don't you think.
>Albedo:This method seems to be tough...Mare change of tactics.
>Mare:Erm...Lets see. If there's anything troubling you guys, let us hear it! We'll do something about it!
>Ainz:[Really?], as they said that, the fairies shared their troubles.
>Ainz:[Actually, we had some rough humans around here recently][They stole our treasures for the sake of money]
>Aura:Huh? Isnt that...
>Shall:The bandits from before?
>Albedo:Looks like it wasn't the goblins, but the bandits
>Aura:Its your chance Mare! Appeal to them using the fact that we beat them earlier!
>Mare:Yeah, Miss Fairy, we already defeated those humans.
>Ainz:[Lies! Humans are great at lying!]
>Mare:Ah...they dont believe me, what should I do?
>Aura:Suggestion! Do a ippatsu gei (Hard to translate this, kinda like an icebreaker act)
>Mare:Don't ask for the impossible sis!
>Albedo:Mare's ippatsu gei...I kinda want to see it.
>Mare:Impossible! I've never done it before!
>Demi:Suggestion! Do an impression of Pandora's Actor
>Mare:No way, I said its impossible!
>Ainz:(He's probably having trouble when everyone is looking at him...)
>Mare:What....What should I do to get the fairy's trust?
>Ainz:(Don't give up Mare! The clues are already there!)
>Mare:Oh thats right! If I show the items dropped earlier...
>Ainz:(Yes! Yes! Very good Mare!)
>Mare:Ah, This is proof! As I said that, I show the fairy the peeled human skin earlier!
>Ainz:(Why THAT!?)
>Mare:Hey miss fairy, don't you remember this face?
>Ainz:(Furthermore the face's! that's really grim!) The Fairy...
Mare looks at Ainz hopefully
>Ainz:(If you are looking at me with eyes of an abandoned puppy...)
>Ainz:The fairy....tighly grabbed Mare's finger.
>Ainz:[Its those guys! My gratitude for defeating them!]
>Aura:Oh! You did it Mare!
>Mare:Thank goodness I succeeded
>Albedo:Good job Mare
>Shall:Well done!
>Demi:Good Good, Ah you fairies, here's the gem we got from the bandits
>Ainz:(SHOW THAT FROM THE START!)
>Ainz:[These gems stolen from us are our treasure, you got them back for us]
>Ainz:The fairies cried tears of joy
>Aura:There, There. Now Mare ask about the goblins
>Mare:Yes, Miss Fairy, have you heard anything about goblins in the area?
>Ainz:[Of course we do]The fairies tell you about a secret path and the route to Goblins
>Demi:Good, it looks like we can continue
>Ainz:Map clear, lets go on to the next one

19:25-25:20

>Ainz:You've finally reached the entrance of the Goblin Cave, at the mouth of the cave are two spear wielding goblins
>Aura:Oh, looks like guards
>Shall:If we don't kill them in 1 hit they'll alert those inside
>Albedo:Distance is 100m, Ainz-sama have the enemies noticed us?
>Ainz:No, not yet. If you do it now you can still sneak in.
>Albedo:Then Aura and Demi, please do a simultaneous attack with your bow and magic. Shall, if anyone escapes, please use your magic to attack.
>Aura:Ok
>Shall:Understood
>Ainz:(Woah, SASUGA Guardian Overseer Albedo, she's already grasped how combat works and come up with tactics)
>Demi:Before that can I make a move? I would like to use magic to buff Aura's attack
>Ainz:Umu, go ahead
>Demi:Thank you very much. Then I'll up bow damage by 2 points Kero.
>Ainz:Ah...Kero?
>Demi:Its the negative effect for this spell, until the battle ends, the player must add Kero to the end of his sentence, is what is written here Kero.
>Ainz:(There it is, the creator's weird taste. Yggdrasil also had these type of items like [Mask of Envy])
>Albedo:If its me I would defintely avoid that.
>Demi:What are you saying? Just by adding a Kero your damage increases by 2 points, so there's not reason not to use it Kero.
>Shall:By the way, why Kero?
>Demi:The spell is called "Poison Dart Frog's Poison" Kero (I know its retarded but thats the literal translation)
>Aura:Poison dart frog doesn't make Kero Kero sounds you know
>Aura:Ah, then I'll be firing, after additional 2 dmg it becomes 6 points Kero
>Shall:Its not like Aura has to add the "Kero", Kero
>Mare:We've been infected Kero
>Shall:Its surprisingly fun Kero
>Demi:I'll use [Fire Arrow] to hit the other for 5 dmg Kero
>Ainz:Two of them have been defeated Kero
>All:Oh...
>Ainz:(Please stop with this awkward silence)
>Albedo:Ainz-sama!
>Ainz:W-What is it Albedo?
>Albedo:If Ainz-sama has been infected by Kero, I too will also be infected by Kero!
>Ainz:No, its fine even if its out of respect. Also, the battle has already ended.
>Demi:Hold on Ainz-sama. Would it be ok to loot their spears?
>Ainz:Erm...ok. Do as you like
>Albedo:Then lets hurry into the cave
>Ainz:Ah, hold on. The cave is dark so you can't see anything if you enter now.
>Aura:Eh? We don't have dark vision?
>Ainz:Well, you are humans
>Aura:Uwah...Humans are really worthless
>Shall:Its better to turn them into vampires
>Mare:What's the point of humans living?
>Ainz:(Erm, It seems to have turned into a game to see how useless humans are?)
>Demi:Well you cant force what you cant do. I'll bring some fire.
>Albedo:I'll lead with Aura. Demi and Mare will be center. Shall will be the rear
>Shall:Yes yes.
>Ainz:Then as you enter the cave, you see a long winding path.
>Demi:Ainz-sama, I'd like to give Albedo the spears from earlier.
>Ainz:There's no problem but the spear only has an attack of 3, her greatsword is stronger.
>Demi:It'll be discarded during battle, we don't know what type of traps so I thought about using spears to for them. I was hoping for something 10 inches long
>Ainz:(He sure loves to complicate matters...Speaking about that Ulbert was the same)
>Ainz:(Everyone in AOG too...To think there would be a day we could play games with our NPCs) *Maruyama's plea for TTRPG buddies here*
>Ainz:(Hmm? If I think about it carefully, is it...Now that the NPCs are players, I've become the NPC?)
>Albedo:Ainz-sama?
>Ainz:Oh, its nothing. As you proceed you reach a door.
>Albedo:Open it.
>Aura:Oi, wait a-
>Ainz:You activated a poison needle trap. Albedo has sustained a def ignoring 1 point of dmg and is now poisoned.
>Albedo:Eh?
>Aura:Really now, we don't have poison resistance you know? Wait for me to search for traps. Hey Mare, cure her.
>Mare:Um. I'll be using detox magic
>Albedo:Sorry, I still haven't left our usual thought process
>Shall:We usually always have our poison resistance eq
>Mare:Erm...Hmmm?
>Aura:What's wrong Mare?
>Mare:Umm, I was thinking if the goblins have to disarm the traps everytime they leave
>Demi:For their storage areas I guess they do, but putting it in entrances is very ineffective
>Ainz:(Stop finding holes in the scenario! They probably never even thought about this!)
>Demi:But for Ainz-sama's wise words, there may be a meaning behind it we will never understand
>Ainz:(I'm not the one who made this!)

Ends 30:45

>Shall:Attack with broadsword, 4 Damage
>Ainz:Umu, with that attack all the goblins in the room have been eliminated
>Aura:The last guy had outrageously high attack power
>Mare:I'll be healing, sis.
>Aura:Ah, thanks
>Demi:Damage higher than the other goblins, in other words...Ainz-sama, is it using a magic weapon?
>Ainz:SASUGA Demi, you realised it. This goblin's greatsword can increase attack by 1.
>Albedo:Hand it over!
>Aura:Those are serious eyes
>Albedo:It can't be helped, as a warrior I can only attack. Ainz-sama, has anything else dropped?
>Ainz:There's also a potion that increases Def, it takes up a turn to use. It addes 1 def until the battle ends
>Albedo:Using it is advantageous,but taking up a turn is a waste. Ainz-sama
>Ainz:Hmm?
>Albedo:How about, putting the potion in my mouth like this? So when battle begins I can drink it without wasting a turn?
>Aura:Cheap (Or cheating)
>Shall: Cheap (Or cheating)
>Albedo:This is for the sake of the party!
>Ainz:Ahh...If you had a mouth pouch like Hamsuke it might be possible...
>Albedo:Mouth pouch?
>Aura:Hahaha! Just thinking about Albedo with a full mouth pocket...
>Shall:Hahaha..The title of Guardian Overseer would be ruined..hehehe! (Aura & Shalltear continue laughing)
>Albedo:Hmph.
>Shall:Al..Albedo?
>Aura:Are you...angry?
>Albedo:Anyone have a spell to create a mouth pocket?
>Aura:Whats with that pinpoint specific kind of spell...

Ends 32:50

>Aura:I'll use my lockpicking skill
>Ainz:The lock opens with a clacking sound
>Mare:Sis you're amazing!
>Albedo:As expected of a thief
>Aura:Heh-Hmm. I wonder whats inside?
>Ainz:Pushing open the huge heavy doors, a small room appears before you. There are many items lying around.
>Mare:Could this be a storage?
>Aura:It might be a treasury!
>Shall:Lets search around
>Ainz:The results of your investigation are 5 bottles of potions. Red, Blue, White, Black and Yellow in colour.
>Albedo:Do we know what type of potions they are?
>Ainz:Regrettably its impossible to find out. The only way to know the effects are to drink them.
>Aura:Then why don't we each drink one?
>Mare:Eh? I don't think we should do that sis
>Aura:No problem, No problem, after all its just a game. Here, I'll give Mare the blue one.
>Mare:Uuu..I'll drink it
>Ainz:After Mare drinks the blue potion...
>Mare:After I drink..?
>Ainz:Somethings feels wrong with your body. You feel like you lost something you needed, but gained something you didn't need.
>Ainz:How could this happen? Your gender has swapped! Or so it appears. (Sorry its not a social construct)
>Shall:Sex change!?
>Aura:In other words, Mare became a girl?
>All:Uh...
>Albedo:I just thought of it but...There doesn't seem to be anything wrong
>Shall:Seems like it
>Demi:Well his usual appearance is like that anyway
>Mare:Eh...Me become a girl? I dont want that...
>Albedo:So you dont like it huh
>Mare:Well, Bukubuku Chagama made me an otoko no ko (roughly means Male Daughter or for crossdressers; think Bridget) after all
>Ainz:(Even if its written [Male Daughter], it should be [Child Boy] (Wordplay here, both are otoko no ko/musume but mean different things))
>Ainz:(But if Mare really became a girl, it would go against Chagama san's intetions)
>Aura:Well its just a game, I'll be drinking the Yellow one.
>Ainz:After Aura drinks the yellow potion...
>Aura:After drinking? After drinking?
>Ainz:An irreversible time, whether its a blessing or a curse, your character ages 10 years.
>Aura:Eh?
>Albedo:If its in the real world, it'll be a potion I definitely don't want to drink
>Aura:10 years...10 Years huh...Hmm, don't really know how to feel
>Ainz:If its a human Aura that ages 10 years, maybe like Albedo?
>Mare:A sis that's like Albedo..
>Aura:[Mature voice]Leave it to me Ainz-sama, all for the Supreme Being.
>Ainz:Um...Umu.
>Albedo:You are doing it unexpectably well
>Aura:[Mature voice]Good evening Guardian Overseer-dono. Today's 6th floor is peaceful
>Shall:She's already a different person...
>Aura:[Mature voice]Ara Shalltear, as short as usual I see. Sorry that my bust and height have already grown bigger than yours!
>Shall:Do you want to be sucked dry!?
>Albedo:I wonder if we'll see Aura like that one day...
>Aura:Well, Mare and I can't be kids forever
>Ainz:I wonder how Mare will be as an adult
>Aura:Hey Mare! Ainz-sama is asking! Try speaking like an adult!
>Mare:Ehh? If you ask me so suddenly I won't know..
>Aura:Its fine its fine, just give it a shot!
>Mare:[Mature voice]Geez, Sis hasn't changed a bit after all this time (Cue slap poster)
>All:Ohhhh
>Mare:W-wait a moment! That wasn't me earlier!
>Aura:Eh?
>Demi:Ah, sorry. It was my [Mantra] at work
>Shall:You!?
>Demi:Males go through voice changes you see. The bone of the throat around here..."Adam's Apple" can make your voice deeper.
>Mare:"Adam's Apple"...I wonder if Dark Elves have that
>Aura:In the first place...What's a "Adam's Apple"?
>Demi:Its originally a reference to Buddha, seems to be something humans worshipped.
[Ok I had to look this entire part up, apparently the Adam's Apple is written 喉仏 in Japanese, but the 仏 means Buddha. I don't know the lore behind this so please enlighten me if possible]
>Albedo:In other words to us...It'll be Throat Ainz-sama right? (Because apparently its like Throat Buddha, so Throat Ainz. Very Asian joke which even I don't really get it)
>Ainz:(How did it turn out this way!?)
>Aura:Throat Ainz-sama!
>Shall:What's that? I want it!
>Ainz:Ahh...by the way there are still 3 potions left
>Shall:Then I'll try the red potion, maybe I'll grow a throat Ainz-sama too.
>Ainz:(Peroronchino-san will cry you now)
>Ainz:After Shalltear drinks the red potion....
>Shall:After drinking?
>Ainz:Oh! God! The potion you drank wasn't a potion but an explosives!
>Shall:Huh?
>Ainz:From now on if you take fire damage, you'll explode. The explosion is equivalent to a fireball spell.
>Shall:No way!!!
>Aura:Uwah...you drew the short straw huh. The explosion setting is rather random though.
>Albedo:How much damage does the fire ball spell do?
>Mare:Does Demiurge's character use it?
>Demi:Yes, of course. Its a strong spell that does 12 points of damage ignoring def.
>Demi:Also all surrounding characters take half of that damage as AOE.
>Albedo:Shalltear's character has 14 HP right? Meaning if she takes 2 points of fire damage and above...
>Albedo:In addition of the explosions 12 damage, she'll die in 1 hit.
>Demi:This includes those close to her.
>Aura:That's bad, I'll be staying further away
>Shall:W-Well, it shouldn't be a problem. Our opponents are goblins, the chance they have fire attacks..
>Demi:Just don't get hit by my fireball
>Shall:I'll kill you if you do it!!!
>Mare:Ermm...what should we do with the remaining potions? If they give similar effects...
>Demi:No, the chance of the remaining potions having positive effects is high.
>Mare:Huh? Why is that?
>Demi:2/5 potions had gag effects and 1 had a strong demerit effect
>Demi:If the creator of this game had balance in mind, the next 2 will have positive effects. Which results in 2 gag, 1 demerit, 2 positive.
>Demi:If not it'll be, 1 gag, 1 positive. Which means 3 Gag, 1 positive, 1 negative.
>Mare:I see, so there's that kind of thought process huh.
>Ainz:(This creator's balancing pattern was also similar to Yggdrasil)
>Ainz:(Even though the shitty devs completely ruined the balance!)
>Demi:Well if I was the creator, I would make the 5 potions 2 gag and 3 negative effects.
>Demi:The players would think, "Since the goblins bothered to guard this storage, at least 1 of the potions will be positive" and drink all of them
>Albedo:Not going with 5 negatives but 2 gags huh?
>Demi:This way the players would expect "Maybe there will be a good one"
>Aura:Eeee, you're devils, its a conversation between devils!
>Albedo:Lets thank the creator for not being a devil
>Shall:Making me drink explosives is already devilish enough!
>Albedo:Ainz-sama, of the remaining 2 potions, I'll pick the white one
>Ainz:Umu, after Albedo drinks the white potion...
>Albedo:After I drink...
>Ainz:Blazing energy circulates around your body, and you now take a reduced 2 fire element dmg.
>Albedo:Yes!
>Shall:I should have drank that one!
>Ainz:Also....
>Albedo:Eh?
>Ainz:After drinking this love potion, you have awakened to become a [Warrior of Love]
>Ainz:From now on, everytime you attack you have to shout [LOVE] in your finishing moves
>Albedo:L...Love?
>Shall:HAHAHAHAHA! LAME! Super LAME!
>Mare:By shouting your finishing moves, is there any benefit?
>Ainz:None in particular.
>Aura:A positive and gag effect huh?
>Albedo:You can actually say its only a positive effect. Shouting [LOVE] is nothing to me, after all I'm a [Succubus]
>Aura:Were succubus like that?
>Demi:Glad I didn't drink the white one! That was the one I definitely can't drink.
>Shall:You went on going "Kero Kero", but [LOVE] is off limits?
>Demi:I'm a devil after all~ If I said that word I'll take damage
>Ainz:(You liar!)
>Demi:Well now, lets be off
>Mare:Ermm, aren't we drinking the last black potion?
>Demi:Hmm, I guess we shouldn't. This game's creator seems to have ill intentions.
>Aura:Anyone else want to drink?
>Shall:I'll refrain...
>Albedo:Me too, I wouldnt want any more weird effects..
>Mare:I think we should forget it sis
>Aura:Hmmm...I'm curious about the results but...Oh well. Lets move on, next next!
>Ainz:(They're not drinking the black one huh...Come to think of it what effect was it?)
>Ainz:(Hmm...Explosive acidity, refreshing taste, always bubbly, its [Cola] yo~)
>Ainz:(Yo~ my ass! This will definitely dampen the atmosphere. Think about the reader's/DM's feelings!)
>Ainz:(Ah...the intense tsukkomi activated my suppression)

Ends 42:50

>Aura:Lets see...we've already gone wherever we could. This should be the last room right?
>Albedo:Thanks for mapping for us, Aura.
>Aura:Leave it to me! Its the specialty of a thief!
>Demi:If its the last room, that would mean the goblin leader huh. Let's proceed carefully.
>Albedo:That's right.Then the door...
>All:Ah...
>Albedo:Before opening the door, I'll drink the defense potion.
>Aura:Yes yes, please do as you like.
>Albedo:I've drank it, I'm opening the door
>Ainz:As Albedo opens the door, you see a wide spacious room. The various goblins inside frantically get their weapons ready.
>Ainz:A huge shadow slowly stands up. Standing at 2m with a huge body full of muscles and holding a sparkling magic sword in hand.
>Ainz:Sprouting irregular sharp teeth, its a goblin which let out a loud roar like a drum with bloodlust in its eyes
>Mare:S-Seems scary...
>Shall:Even though its just a mere goblin, when Ainz-sama describes it sounds like an unbelievably powerful monster!
>Albedo:Seems like none of our previous encounters can compare to this
>Ainz:That's correct. The last boss of this map, the battle with the [Goblin King] begins!
>Aura:I'll go first, I'll do 4 attack dmg and +3 def ignore using my skill.
>Ainz:Goblin King's special move: [Critical Dodge], reduces dmg by 3.
>Aura:No way! That guy knows special moves!
>Shall:Its not some regular enemy huh
>Albedo:Shalltear, you take care of the small fry, if Mare and the others are targeted it'll be bad!
>Shall:Understood! Approaching the goblin minions, I use my fire enchanted sword for 6 dmg.
>Albedo:I'll go for the Goblin King, using my magic great sword for 7 dmg.
>Ainz:Its the Goblin King's turn to attack. With a swing of his sword, fire starts spewing out.
>Ainz:Its a broadsword with automatic fire enchantment
>Shall:I'm glad I didn't go there!
>Ainz:Albedo, you take 8 dmg.
>Albedo:As expected its strong. But I have 2 reduced fire dmg.
>Demi:I'm next. I'll use [Fire Ball] on the Goblin King.
>Ainz:That's an AOE spell, so Albedo will take half dmg you know?
>Demi:Doesn't matter, its Mare's turn next anyway. Its also fire dmg so we should do as much to the boss as possible.
>Aura:A devil's way of thinking.
>Demi:I'm a devil after all. Ok 12 dmg to Goblin King and 6 to Albedo.
>Albedo:I understand the tactics but I dont feel satisfied
>Mare:I'll be healing Albedo-san. Use restoration magic to heal 6 HP.
>Ainz:As the turn finishes, the 2 goblin minions attack Shalltear doing 4 dmg twice.
>Shall:A total of 6 dmg, hurts quite a lot!

Ends 46:15

>Albedo:I've decided, [AINZ-SAMA LOVE ATTACK!] 7 dmg.
>Aura:Lame
>Shall:Lame
>Albedo:It can't be helped, those are the rules
>Ainz:The magic imbued sword slashes down on the Goblin King, he lets out a great cry and staggers a few steps back.
>All:Ohhh..
>Ainz:And he falls. Battle end.
>Aura:Yes!We beat it!
>Mare:That was close! I could only heal one more time!
>Shall:I only had 2 HP left!
>Ainz:Splendidly done! With this the map is cle-
>Demi:Please wait! Ainz-sama!
>Ainz:Ah?
>Albedo:What's wrong? Demiurge?
>Demi:Its been on my mind, why did the elder ask use to exterminate the goblins?
>Ainz:(Eh?)
>Demi:If there were goblins drawing near, they could have requested some soldiers to deal with it
>Demi:Waiting to ask some adventurers who just happened to arrive simply makes no sense
>Ainz:(Nonono if that didn't happen there's no way for the adventure to start!)
>Aura:Now that you mention it you're right. For villagers even goblins can be a serious threat
>Mare:But that village, seemed rather peaceful.
>Demi:That's it Mare! That's what I was concerned about. The goblins also made me feel uneasy.
>Demi:The doors within the caves had traps, it means they were living here for some time.
>Demi:Then when its time to go forage, attacking the village earlier wouldn't be strange.
>Albedo:We defeated a total of 12 goblins. Even though there were so many, there were no signs of livestock or farming.
>Albedo:I'm also curious on how they managed to gather food.
>Ainz:(No..thats...Its just a game that's why)
>Demi:Furthermore, the strange equipment the goblins had. Why would mere goblins have magic swords and potions?
>Ainz:(That's for letting the players be happy with better drops right?)
>Demi:Here's one thought, the village elder is definitely working together with the goblins
>Ainz & Mare:Eh!?
>Demi:Giving the goblins tributes as an act of servitude, while getting adventurers to attack them.
>Demi:And after the goblins defeat the adventurers, their equipment will be given to the elder.
>Demi:That's the plan. Human money has no value to goblins that's why.
>Albedo:The magic sword must have been the dropped loot of previous adventurers huh
>Albedo:But if that's the case, the goblins should have known that we were coming.
>Demi:Usually the elder would definitely dispatch villagers to inform the goblins that [Adventurers were coming]
>Demi:But this time...
>Aura:Could it be because the bandits appeared they couldn't send the message?
>Demi:That's right. Because the ignorant bandits killed the messengers, the goblins didn't know we were coming and were annihilated.
>Shall:I see, everything adds up.
>Ainz:(No...Is that really the case?)(Isn't it because the way Demi said it was too convincing?)
>Demi:There's no way Ainz-sama would only let us play a simple game of killing goblins
>Demi:His real motive is testing if we can find out what's really going on. Right? Ainz-sama?
>Ainz:Umu (There's no way that's possible! You're just thinking way too deep into it!)
>Ainz:(If I say that there's no way I can keep Demi's image of me intact...)
>Ainz:(Argh! I just have to go with it!)
>Ainz:SASUGA Demi, just as you said, well observed.
>Demi:Nono, this scenario has too many unnatural factors. They must have been hints for us right?
>Ainz:Umu! That's right. Heh heh, maybe I gave away too many hints?
>Demi:If Ainz-sama plotted it seriously, there would be no way for us to see through it! Truly a brilliant setting!
>Ainz:Is that so? Hmhmhmhm (sensible chuckle)
>Demi:Hmhmhm
>Aura:Why don't we try interrogating the Goblin King?
>Albedo:That's right, I'll use my sword to get the Goblin King to spill everything
>Ainz:Ah...Umu.
>Ainz:The fallen Goblin King screams [Damn elder! You betrayed us!]
>Demi:Looks like Demi's theory was right. We have to make the elder who treated people as idiots pay.
>Ainz:[I've said everything! Please spare me!] The Goblin King says to the players
>Albedo:He's being noisy so I'll kill him.
>Ainz:(As I thought~) So, what do you plan to do next?
>Ainz:(If we followed the original setting it would have already been cleared...)

Ends 51:20

Ok guys, looks like Nigel finished before me on the day I posted the last part. Please look for the rest at the usual place and remember to praise Nigel-sama as always. Thanks for reading.