Misket and Sirius meeting

[08:58]  * dystopianBurlesque [DB] began trolling inauspiciousSettler [IS]
[08:58] <dystopianBurlesque> Hello?
[08:58] <inauspiciousSettler> Howdy.
[08:58] <dystopianBurlesque> This is the person from the forum?
[08:59] <Zion> (would you mind using [BD] and [IS] instead? easier to read)
[08:59] == Nickname is already in use: DB
[08:59] == dystopianBurlesque has changed nick to [DB]
[08:59] == Archivist [[email protected]] has joined #rpgstuck_orwell
[08:59] == inauspiciousSettler has changed nick to IS
[08:59] <[DB]> (("DB" is taken))
[08:59] <IS> ((Change the capitalization or add an underscore?))
[09:00] == [DB] has changed nick to DB_
[09:00] <DB_> ((Sure))
[09:00] <IS> ((Anyway))
[09:00] <IS> Maybe I'm bein' a little sentimental, but I guess I gotta get some stuff off my chest.
[09:01] <IS> Maybe you know how it is. Might even be why you answered.
[09:01] <IS> But maybe I'm gettin' ahead of myself. I'm Sirius. Sirius Mancoh.
[09:02] <DB_> +Misket.  What is it that's bothering you, +Sirius?
[09:02] <IS> Hm. Money. Money always bothered me, I s'pose.
[09:02] <DB_> Money?  Why?
[09:02] <IS> That's a bad joke, but it ties into the story, anyway.
[09:03] <DB_> Alright.  I won't interrupt then.  Tell me your story.
[09:03] <IS> Woulda been about a sweep back, I was out lookin' for work. My lusus accompanied me, as any dutiful lusus would-and should.
[09:04] <IS> Well, I'm out, and I find somethin' promisin'. A job. Difficulty looks low, pay looks high. Jackpot, right?
[09:04] <IS> Well, I take it. As one does. I'm told to go to a village, and check up on it.
[09:05] <IS> Place has been silent for days. Weeks. Folks are gettin' worried.
[09:05] <IS> I go in, and the place looks abandoned.
[09:05] <DB_> A trap?
[09:05] <IS> I start pokin' around, and I see corpses. Plague victims. Don't ask me what the ailment was; I ain't no doctor.
[09:06] <IS> Well, as I'm leavin', I see somethin' runnin' towards me from an alley, arms outstretched, beggin' for death.
[09:06] <IS> So I obliged.
[09:07] <IS> The gunfire musta drawn 'em all out, and it got crowded, but I obliged them, too.
[09:07] <IS> I musta cut down forty trolls. Burned the whole place to the ground.
[09:08] <IS> That's the short version. Covers all the important bits.
[09:08] <DB_> I see.
[09:08] <DB_> And you feel guilty?
[09:08] <IS> The guilt I feel is... Halfhearted? I feel like I was justified, but they were unarmed, sufferin', dyin'.
[09:09] <DB_> Are you 100% certain they wanted it?
[09:09] <IS> The whole job was a wash. I burned the place to the ground, and took only enough of the 1000 Caegar bounty to cover expenses and bullets.
[09:09] <IS> And I can only remember the first one asking for it.
[09:10] <DB_> ... Oh.
[09:10] <IS> The illness... Looked like a sorta... Festering? Like decay. Their flesh fell off as they ran at me.
[09:11] <IS> I remember it hittin' the ground with splats. Decisive ones.
[09:12] <DB_> +Sirius, it sounds to me like you did them a kindness.
[09:13] <IS> Maybe I'm imaginin' the sounds. You know how gunfire is. Loud, with a sense of finality. The punctuation at the end of the sentence, that sentence usually bein' someone's life.
[09:13] <IS> And maybe I did, but it doesn't just not stick with you, y'know? You don't forget the faces of those you kill. You do 'em a disservice by doin' so.
[09:14] <DB_> Of course.
[09:15] <DB_> Did anyone ever learn what the plague was?
[09:15] <IS> No. Good grief no. I burned the place to the ground, bodies and all, and informed the employer that it had been burned to the ground by bandits.
[09:16] <DB_> I would have made sure to get myself tested, after something like that.
[09:17] <IS> Hm. Call it what you like, but I've never truly been afraid of outcomes. When I fight, or expose myself to somethin' hazardous like that, I accept the consequences for my actions.
[09:18] <IS> This philosophy extends to my gunfighting; when someone pulls iron, draws a weapon on you, it is the truest declaration of their intent, their tacit agreement to combat, and their acceptance of the consequences and outcomes.
[09:18] <DB_> Yeah.  You can't avoid the consequences, of course, but it's still good to know what they will be, right?
[09:19] <IS> In a fight, that answer's usually pretty simple, 'least for the short term: live or die.
[09:19] <DB_> If I get bit by a spider when fighting it, I'll want to know what the poison does.
[09:19] <IS> There's a certain gravity to takin' a life, sure.
[09:19] <DB_> It's no good to win a fight just to keel over a couple days later.
[09:20] <DB_> I mean, it's BETTER, but not much.
[09:20] <IS> Hah! Guess I'm a lucky guy, then.
[09:21] <IS> Maybe I don't think about the long term too much, but I wouldn't call myself headstrong, exactly.
[09:22] <IS> But why did you come? Why did you want to hear this story?
[09:22] <DB_> I just, you know
[09:22] <DB_> Like hearing stories.
[09:23] <IS> This one's a particularly violent one to flock to.
[09:23] <DB_> It does sound a lot worse in light of what the story actually was, yes.  Sorry about that.
[09:24] <IS> I can understand. S'not like you expected the story to be happy.
[09:24] <IS> That was made evident by the forum post. These are sins, after all.
[09:24] <DB_> Yes.
[09:25] <DB_> Well, +Sirius, if it's any consolation, or if it's what you were hoping for, then I absolve you of your guilt.  If you're asking whether you did the right thing, then I think you did.
[09:25] <DB_> Or did you just want someone to talk to about it?
[09:26] <IS> Wasn't askin' for absolution, but I appreciate the gesture. A sin's a sin, regardless of whether you're forgiven for it or not.
[09:27] <IS> Seems a little nihilistic, maybe. You wouldn't be the first to tell me I'm forgiven for 'em, neither.
[09:27] <DB_> Lots of people do worse things.
[09:28] <IS> "Lots of people" aren't involved in this conversation. You are, though, and you've been rather quiet.
[09:29] <DB_> I was trying not to interrupt you.  It's your story.
[09:29] <DB_> Did you want me to say more?
[09:29] <IS> Let's just go ahead and say you have the floor.
[09:30] <DB_> Well
[09:30] <DB_> I admit, I don't have any stories quite as important as that.
[09:31] <DB_> I just kill any lusii that wander down here.
[09:31] <IS> Hm? Why?
[09:31] <IS> Hungry?
[09:32] <DB_> Food is a big part of it, yes.  + safety, in a lot of cases.
[09:32] <IS> You're a survivalist of sorts?
[09:33] <DB_> Oh, goodness no.  I'm not going to survive.  But there's no reason to let that stop me, right?
[09:33] <IS> Why not?
[09:34] <IS> You can fight, right? You got the drive to fight, don't you?
[09:34] <DB_> I CAN fight.  That won't help me if somebody else decides it's time for me to die, but it helps with the monsters.
[09:35] <IS> Nobody decides when it's time for you to die, so long as you've got the will.
[09:35] <DB_> I sincerely doubt that wanting to live will protect me from a crossbow bolt to the throat.
[09:36] <IS> Wanting to live makes you dodge or block it, don't it?
[09:37] <DB_> It makes me try.  At the end of the day, though, I'm not invincible.
[09:37] <IS> If it's kill or be killed, I'M the one doin' the killin'.
[09:37] <IS> That's my decision. And it keeps me alive.
[09:37] <DB_> Forever?
[09:38] <IS> As far as I'm concerned.
[09:38] <DB_> I think what I'm saying is
[09:38] <IS> As far as the people I protect are concerned, too.
[09:38] <DB_> You protect people?
[09:39] <IS> I keep order in this town. Decided to stay. Couldn't keep livin' that life anymore.
[09:40] <IS> We're all lowbloods, but I s'pose lowbloods oughta stick together.
[09:40] <IS> The whole caste system is hoofbeastshit anyway
[09:40] <DB_> I mean, from a biological standpoint...
[09:40] <IS> They can come a-cullin', but it'll be a helluva fight
[09:41] <IS> Yeah, I know. They can shove their longevity up their asses.
[09:41] <IS> I've fought highbloods. They're tough, but they AIN'T invincible.
[09:42] <DB_> Nobody is.
[09:42] <DB_> You + I just happen to be less invincible than them.
[09:43] <DB_> A lot less.
[09:43] <IS> And you'd just capitulate when faced with the prospect of fightin' one? I'm an olive, and that hasn't stopped me.
[09:43] <DB_> No!
[09:44] <DB_> Of course not!  But that doesn't mean I would automatically win, either.
[09:44] <DB_> Dying is a very real possibility.
[09:45] <DB_> What I'm trying to say, I think
[09:46] <DB_> Is that you can't just use "survival" as your ultimate goal.  People die all the time.
[09:46] <IS> The hell I can't! Here:
[09:47] <IS> Take your survival, and imagine someone's countin' on it.
[09:47] <IS> Anyone. A friend. A moirail. A kismesis.
[09:47] <DB_> My lusus.
[09:47] <IS> Would you not believe you could do the impossible?
[09:47] <DB_> I would try.
[09:48] <IS> Damn straight.
[09:48] <DB_> But I won't throw away the rest of my life until that happens.
[09:49] <IS> Hm.
[09:50] <DB_> You don't think so?
[09:50] <IS> Well,
[09:51] <IS> I'm not sayin' I don't know how to pick my battles.
[09:51] <IS> But i also recognize that I don't always have the choice.
[09:52] <DB_> Right.
[09:52] <DB_> There's a difference between being ready to die + being willing to.
[09:52] <IS> ((Gotta pause this for 10 minutes; sister needs a ride to school))
[09:52] <DB_> ((kk))
[10:04] <IS> ((K))
[10:04] <IS> ((Back))
[10:04] <IS> DB_:
[10:04] <DB_> ((Aright))
[10:05] <DB_> Right.
[10:05] <DB_> There's a difference between being ready to die + being willing to.
[10:05] <IS> Always ready to, never willing to.?
[10:05] <DB_> Exactly!
[10:06] <DB_> I've been ready for years, it's great!
[10:06] <DB_> But I still don't want to.
[10:07] == Zion [[email protected]] has quit [Quit: http://www.kiwiirc.com/ - A hand crafted IRC client]
[10:07] <IS> Hm. You and I might not be so different. Why have you been ready to die?
[10:07] <IS> ((F))
[10:08] <DB_> Well I mean
[10:08] <DB_> Alternia is dangerous.  There's a good chance on any given day that I'll be utterly obliterated by some random monster.
[10:08] <DB_> So why shouldn't I be?
[10:10] <IS> I can picture it. But at least it won't stop you from trying
[10:10] <DB_> Of course it won't.  Giving up would be being willing to die, + that's bad.
[10:10] <IS> What else do you do, aside from kill Lusii and prepare yourself for your inevitable death?
[10:11] <DB_> I read stories.
[10:11] <DB_> Like yours.
[10:12] <IS> Hm! Why? You have some sort of interest in the macabre?
[10:13] <DB_> Yeah!  It's interesting.
[10:14] <IS> Apparently. What interests you about it? Is it the death? That feelin' of bein' vicariously steeped in sin and guilt?
[10:15] <DB_> I dunno, maybe.
[10:15] <DB_> The thing is
[10:15] <DB_> It's REAL.
[10:16] <IS> What makes it more real than a happier yarn?
[10:17] <DB_> At the end of the day, if somebody dies, then they're dead.  If two people get in a fight + then separate before killing each other, then there wasn't much of a point at all.  Or if a story is just about some happy little wriggler + her being friends with her lusus.
[10:20] <DB_> Or maybe I'm just weird.
[10:20] <IS> Hahaha, maybe so! In any case, I need to leave. Something's come up, and I can hear a ruckus outside.
[10:21] <DB_> Try not to die.
[10:21] <IS> I s'pose you can stay in touch, though.
[10:21] <IS> And I'll be sure not to die. I'll tell ya all about it when I get back.
[10:21] <DB_> Awesome!
[10:21] <DB_> I'll talk to you later, then.
[10:21] <IS> Adios.
[10:22] <DB_> dystopianBurlesque [DB] ceased trolling inauspiciousSettler [IS]