WASTELAND! With Horses - Chapter 4

"Why, we'd love to."
>Granny Smith beams at you
>"Right this way now, dearies."
>you get to the opposite corner of the the orchard
>Granny Smith fumbles with an antique keyring and opens the cellar
>"Head right on in now, girls. Take anything you like."
>you enter the cellar and are greeted with rows upon rows of boxes, barrels, and various containers of all sorts
>there's no telling what could be in here
>your team gets to work searching through the place
>you notice Red and Fluttershy are still wearing the outfits Angel fitted them with
"Um, Red, are you going to put your jacket back on?"
~"What?"
"You're still dressed up like a Saddle Arabian good time gal."
>Red is apparently mortified
~"Oh, uh, fuck."
>she quickly tears off the silks and the collar
>she places a hoof on the panties, pushes, and turns a bright red
~"I can't get this shit off!"
"What?"
~"It's like it's locked on or something."
>Fluttershy, who has taken note of the conversation, tones in
>"You mean like a chastity belt?"
~"What would you know about it?"
>"N-nothing!"
>Fluttershy loses interest in your discussion
"I think it's some sort of precious metal."
>you lean in for a closer look
>you notice that the material has a strange shimmer to it
>it's like glowing embers
"I've never seen anything like it before!"
~"Well that's great! Stop ogling my ass!"
"Quiet. I'm going to figure out how to get this thing off."
~"I don't know if I'd trust you to do it…"
"I've worked with precious metals all my life. I'm the most trustworthy pony around when it comes to matters such as these."
~"Not what I meant."
"Shut the hell up you buccaneering slag."
>the material is completely smooth and featureless
>there's no apparent way to open it
"Hm, if only there were some sort of mechanism…"
>a metallic ping sounds, and your eyes dart to the source
"There. There's a little latch, right there under your tail."
>you back off, Red flicks the latch, and the varmint fetish gear falls off
"Fluttershy, darling. Do you want yours taken off too?"
>"Yes please."
>you look right under Fluttershy's tail, which starts shuddering for some reason, for the latch
"Where'd the mechanism go? I hope it's in a more convenient location."
>a ping sounds again, and you crane your neck around to see a latch right over Fluttershy's cutie mark
"There. On your flank."
>Fluttershy flicks the latch, and the panties fall off
>your team finally taken care of, you turn to the cellar at last to claim your reward
>you see Red stuffing her 'outfit' into a box, apparently opting to leave something behind rather that just taking
>in the first box you look in, you find some bits
_"I found some canned food."
/"Zere is a grenade here!"
~"Ammo!"
>out of the corner of your eye, you catch what seems to be a firey figure sliding in and out of your range of vision
>you wheel around to face it
>but there's nothing there
>wait, it must have been a reflection from that ring on the floor
>that beautiful, beautiful ring
>you step in close to see it better
>the band is of that shimmering, burning, golden material
>the gem is a ruby, and it too possesses a quality like glowing embers
>ignoring the shimmering, it looks just like your cutie mark
>down to the last detail
>and it's clearly meant for unicorn use only, being much too small to wear around a hoof but being just the right size for your horn
/"Ruby, ze Sun is rising. Ve should go now."
>you look away from the ring
"R-right. Let's"
>Applejack has a question
>"Well, before you go, I must ask if you still need Fluttershy and I to tag along with you."
>Fluttershy offers you her panties
>"Oh, um, y-you said you were good with precious metals, and that you'd never seen anything like this before. Maybe you should take this back to headquarters, a-and… study it… with Twilight Sparkle…"
~"Hey, I'm good with stopping by HQ. I just checked the checklist and I'm due for a promotion!"
>now that piques your interest
>you whip out your advancement checklist, and everyone else in the cellar does likewise
"Why, so am I!"
/"Ach, as am I."
_"Me too!"
>even Applejack has a eureka moment
>"Well I'll be."
>Captain Armor did tell you to be out of town before Sunrise
>but you need to contact him to earn your rank up
>he'll probably understand that you were up all night saving Ponyville's food supply, right?

>after a moment of thinking, you have the next step of your master plan
"All right. Applejack and Fluttershy, you can come with us to headquarters so we can explain what happened and get our promotions. And Fluttershy, you should present your… garment to Twilight Sparkle for study. After that, you two are free to leave."
~"All right! Pay raise here I come!"
_"We get paid?"
>you steal a quick glance back at the ring
"Let's move out, Rangers. We've done well."
>your team bounds out of the cellar and into the dim light of the rising Sun
>you turn to the ring
>you admire its features
>the way it captures the light and seemingly produces its own
/"Are you coming?"
>you quickly magic the ring into your saddlebag
>Aryanne has poked her head into the cellar to see what was taking you so long
>she doesn't seem to have noticed what you just did
"Of course."
>with that, you nonchalantly exit the cellar
>you drop by the barn again to let Granny Smith know you're going
>Applejack opens the door to tell her
>"Granny, I'm going to HQ for a- Apple Bloom! There you are!"
>indeed, there she is, already being smothered in attention by her grandmother and brother
>Applejack runs into the barn
>"Come on now, darling, where'd you hide Winona? You know we have to put her to sl- Oooohhhhh, where did that scar come from?."
>Apple Bloom blinks, looks up, and notices you
>Apple Bloom squints and shakes her head
>"I don't remember where Winona is, and I don't know where this scar came from, neither. Are those Rangers?"
>thank the Sun, she doesn't remember a thing
>just how hard did Red hit the poor girl?
>Applejack smiles
>"They certainly are Rangers. They just helped us solve our pest problem."
>Apple Bloom waves at you
>"Thanks!"
"You're very welcome, sweetheart!"
~"Y-y-yeah, n-no problem."
>Applejack faces you
>"I was going to go with you to HQ to get my promotion, but now that my sister is here I'd like to stay a while with her before heading back out. You're sure you don't need me for anything?"
"Yes, we're sure. Have fun with your family, Applejack."
>"Will do! Be careful out there now."
>it's a long and quiet walk back to the library as everyone is engrossed in their own thoughts
>you get there and enter
>Shining Armor notices you
>he's pissed
>"What are you four still doing here? Didn't I tell you to be gone by now? And Fluttershy! I've marked you down for unauthorized absence at five musters! Where have you b… uh, you guys look like hell. What happened?"
"We've been up all night clearing out mutant vermin from Sweet Apple Acres."
>"Sweet Apple Acres? Was Applejack involved in this? She missed this morning's reservist muster too."
"Yes. Her sister just came home and she's making sure the little darling's all right."
>"If she's all right it's no thanks to you guys."
>Fluttershy looks askance
>"What does that mean?"
~"Nothing!"
>Shining Armor's attention is drawn to Fluttershy and his eyes narrow
>"Private Fluttershy, why did you bring fetish gear into my HQ?"
>Fluttershy drops the panties with a clang and begins to stammer
"It's a little souvenir from the vermin last night, sir."
>"I don't even wanna know. Why is it here?"
"I don't know what it's made of, and I've been working with precious metals all my life, sir. We wanted to submit to Twilight Sparkle for study."
>Twilight materializes out of thin air
>literally
>"Did someone say 'study'?"
>Captain Armor sighs
>"Twiley, just look at it. You can't be taking this seriously."
>Twilight looks at it and apparently takes it very seriously
>"Wow! This metal is amazing! I have no idea what it is! Ruby, nopony knows precious metals better than you; are you sure you don't know this stuff?"
"Not a clue."
>"Hmm… I think I feel magical properties! I'll be right back!"
>Twilight vanishes with a magenta poof
>Shining Armor sighs
>"All right, that explains why Fluttershy is here. Now why are the rest of you here?"
>Red presses her advancement checklist in his face
~"You owe us some paperwork, Cap'n."
>"Red, for the last time, this isn't a sea service! 'Captain' doesn't mean the same… as… You're already ready for a promotion?"
>before Red can say anything you step forward, offer your own checklist, and radiate the Captain with your trademark Ruby grin
"Yes, sir. We all are."
>"Really?"
>he looks around to see Aryanne and Sketchy holding up their completed checklists as well and sighs
>"Fine."
>he magics up four single chevron pins and distributes them
>"I hereby award you all the rank of Private First Class. Now will you please go away?"

"Do you mind if we stop by medical before we go, sir?"
>your axe wound is still sticky, and at this point it's dirty too
>there are still purple blotches showing through Aryanne's white coat
>"Uh, yeah. In fact, do go, and that's an order."
"Yes, sir!"
>without further ado, you take off toward the door
/"Sturmhauptführer, vhere is medical?"
>"Downstairs. Right next to the lab."
>you about face and take off toward the basement door
>you place a hoof on a step, and wince as you discover that downward stairs have decided to become your enemy
>you hobble downstairs as best as you're able, Echo Squad in tow, and knock on the door labeled "MEDICAL"
>a white earth pony mare with a pink mane opens up the upper half of the door and glares at you
>"Whattaya want?"
"Good morning, ma'am. I was wondering if you could help my squadmate and I."
>scowling, she glances over you and Aryanne
>"Hm... For the both o' ya, I'd say about 19 bits."
"What? We're Rangers! We have to pay to use our own medical facility?"
>"The princess is dead, sweetheart; the GI bill no longer applies. Now if you want that gash closed you'll fork over the bits - and I am talkin' about the one on ya chest; there's nothin' I can do about ya other one 'cept tell ya ta close ya damn legs ya fuckin slut."
"I'm glad to see that the civilian contractors of the Friendship Rangers hold themselves to the highest standard of professionalism."
>you fork over the bits to the unimpressed nurse and are allowed into medical
>"All right you an' blondie go have a seat at that table I'll be right back."
>she points at Red and Sketchy
>"You two wait out here. I don't need ya fat asses gettin' in my way."
~"Eat a dick, ye fockin' cunt."
>why the fake North Trottingham accent?
>the nurse slams the door in your squadmates' faces and makes her way to a back room
>a moment of painfully awkward silence ensues as you and Aryanne find nothing to say to one another
>the nurse returns, pushing a cart covered in various cleaning supplies
>"All right, you first, little miss socialist."
>Aryanne perks up at this, but the nurse procures a bottle of peroxide and a bag of cotton swabs and turns to you
>she dumps the swabs onto the cart, dumps the peroxide onto the swabs, and picks one up
>"All right sweetheart, this is gonna hurt. A lot."
>she jams the swab directly into your exposed flesh and rubs it around your wound
>you groan and bite your lip
>your eyes turn hot and your vision blurs
>she pulls out, spits the filthy swab from her mouth, grabs another, and repeats the process about five more times
>after spitting out the last swab, she chastizes you
>"Ah, quit cryin' ya big baby. We haven't even come ta the fun part yet."
>the nurse rummages around her gear and comes back up with a needle and thread
>JUST
>"Hold real fuckin' still now, ya hear?"
>the nurse pricks the edge of your wound
>and Twilight Spakle appears in a flash of purple
>and the needle stabs you in the chest
>you cry out and fall off of the table
>the nurse sighs
>"Ruby? Are you here? Aryanne, have you seen Ruby?"
/"On ze floor, in her death throes."
>"Ruby, there you are. I did some investigating on those panties you brought me and there are definitely magical properties."
>the nurse sees the panties and scoffs
>"I knew you were a fuckin' slut; the red mane nevah lies."
>you climb back onto the table and the nurse resumes sewing
"Magical properties? What sort, Twilight?"
>"That's just it. I'm not sure. But I'm sure they're there. In addition to the strange luminescent properties, how did Fluttershy put them on? How did Fluttershy take them off? It's not possible without some kind of magic! The waistband is too tight."
/"Did you try zem on, Kamerad Sparkle?"
>"It was a purely scientific endeavour!"
"There's a latch. Right there on the side."
>Twilight examines the entire garment
>"Latch? I don't see it. Where?"
>she shoves the thing in your face and it smacks the nurse in the back of the head, sending the needle into your flesh once again
>squinting through the pain, you look and see that there really is no latch
"Huh. There was most definitely a latch right th-"
>ping
>the latch you envisioned appears before your eyes
>"Wow! This is fascinating! I think it's responding to your mind, Ruby. Let me try."
>Twilight Sparkle puts a hoof to her head, grimaces, and groans
>nothing happens
>she flares up her horn, and apparently attempts to manipulate it via magic, but the magic rolls off of the metal like rain on a parka
>"Hm. Ruby, imagine something else in these panties."
>the nurse scoffs through her teeth
>"I can tell ya one thing she's imaginin' in those panties."
>shut the fuck up nurse you fucking cunt
>ping
>your cutie mark appears on the panties, coincidentally followed by a mysterious red flush on your face
>the nurse chuckles and stabs you again, this time probably on purpose
>Twilight scowls
>"Hm... but why would it only respond to you and not me?"
/"Perhaps, Kamerad, it is because of Ruby's profession as a jeweller. You said yourself zat noone knows precious metals better zan her."
>"That could be it."
"It makes sense to me. When I manipulate metal with tools, I can visualize the metal on an atomic level in its crystalline structures. Metal is my passion; I've been working with it and learning about it since I was little. Let me try something."
>you visualize the molecular structure of the metal fetish gear changing and molding into...
>ping
>Twilight is left holding a thick, golden hoof ring
>"Amazing. Does your magic have any effect on it?"
>using your magic, you attempt to telekinetically engrave your name on the ring
>your magic, like Twilight's simply rolls off of it
>"Now why would it be immune to magic?"
>the ring hits the nurse in the head again, sending the needle into your chest again
>"I'll show you immunity, Sparkle! If you don't fuck off right the hell now I'll tell ya brotha you need anotha peanut butter shot!"
>Twilight can take a hint
>"All right Ruby, I've gotta go learn metallurgy. If you need me, I'll be in the library. BYE!"
>Twilight vanishes just before a scalpel flies through the space she once occupied
>"All right, we're almost done with you."
>the nurse pulls the needle through one more time and ties off a knot
>"All right, ya good, get the hell outta here while I work on ya albino friend."
>getting the hell out of there is exactly what you do
~"Where's Aryanne?"
"The nurse is getting started on her now. Say, may I ask-"
>your bladder chooses this moment to hit you like a freight train
>you forget what you were going to ask
"-Do you mind if I visit the latrine? I'll be back in a moment."
~"What the hell are you asking me for? Just go."
>and go you do; you race upstairs in search of the loo
>you find it and rush in
>you sigh as you remember that relieving yourself can be so... relieving
>you go to wash your hooves to hear an accent nearly as posh as yours greet you
>"Ruby, darling! It's so good to see you! How is the wasteland? Tell me, do the marauders all wear dreadfully tacky clothing?"
>you glance in the mirror and see the only pony in the world you expected to see
>the reason you came to Ponyville at all
>the only reason you're alive right now
>the pony who was supposed to be your employee
>Rarity
"Oh, Rarity. I, uh, haven't been out of Ponyville quite yet. The gang and I are going to go and see the wasteland for ourselves today though."
>"Oh, but I'm so glad you haven't gone yet! Just imagine if you'd left without saying goodbye first!"
>your mother flashes through your mind
>suddenly you become very conscious of the ring in your bag
>should you show it to Rarity?
>she knows jewelry almost as well as you do, even though her true passion lies in fabrics
>or maybe you shouldn't waste the time and should just get back to your squad and head out
>or maybe...
>...maybe the ring should be kept a secret...
>knowing what magical properties the metal has, there's no telling if HQ would demand that you hand it over as a potentially hazardous item
>but you'd still really like to show off to Rarity

"Say, Rarity. I know your forté is rather more putting gems into clothes than into jewellery, but did you ever see gold that shimmered like fire?"
>"Why, no. Never in all my life. By the strange suddenness of your question I'm guessing you've found something of exactly that sort?"
"Indeed."
>now would be the time to mention your magnificent ring
>but… it's probably better that you don't
"I turned it over to Twilight Sparkle. She's trying to suss out its magical properties."
>"Oh my. Just how did you come across something like that?"
>you recount to Rarity your tale from last night
>the bunnies, the firey chain, the mutant bunny lord, the telepathic panties, everything but the ring
>next you tell her about your discussion with Twilight Sparkle and how you discovered the strange qualities of the metal
>Rarity has some questions
>"Oh, darling! You told me you hadn't been out to the wasteland yet, but you didn't bother telling me that the wasteland had come here? Why, you're living a life of danger right here in Ponyville!"
"Ah, well…"
>"I am somewhat concerned though. Do you think that chain was made of the same metal as that garment?"
"I suppose it's… likely."
>"Well you'd better tell Twilight Sparkle before you go so she doesn't burn this tree fort down."
"Oh, certainly. I'll make it a point to do that."
>"One more thing. Just how did a bunny come across these items made of this metal?"
"Well, I uh, assume he found the metal and formed it with his mind."
>"Didn't you say that only you could manipulate it due to your knowledge of this sort of thing? I doubt that bunny was exactly a master metallurgist. And where did he find the metal?"
>damn
>Rarity certainly isn't stupid
>before you can think of a coherent answer, Twilight Sparkle materializes before once more
"Twilight the metal is flammable!"
>"What? Oh, that. Yeah, I figured that out already."
>she gestures to her scorched mane
>"Speaking of flammable things…"
>Twilight magics Spike the dragon from her back
>Rarity shrieks
>"Twilight Sparkle! This is the ladies' latrine! That's a male!"
>Twilight chuckles
>"Oh, relax you. It'll only take a second. You're not indecent or anything, are you?"
>Rarity accepts this answer, but not without some further indignance
>"Well, I could have been…"
>Twilight ignores Rarity
>"Ruby, one more thing before you go. Spike here was working on a communications spell with his old employer. He just taught it to me after he was reminded of it by your metal setting me on fire! Spike, send Ruby this scroll."
>Spike, whose eyes have been on Rarity from the second he arrived, shakes his head, grunts, takes the scroll, and sets it on fire
>in an instant, the scroll re-materializes inches from your head, and you catch it in your magic
>"See? Just like that. And to send it back, all you need to do is set it on fire using magic."
"I don't know any fire spells."
>"There's one on the scroll. This will make it so you don't have to come back to Ponyville every time you need to contact someone here."
>before you can thank her, she vanishes, leaving Spike staring at Rarity with a dumb look on his face
>wordlessly, you grab Spike in your magic, exit the latrine, and toss him to the side
>"Hey, you're welcome!"
>ignoring that, you make your way downstairs, where your squad is waiting for you
~"Fucking there you are. Are we going or what?"
"You bet we're going."
>a small round of cheers sounds
>with wordless anticipation, you ascend the stairs and exit the library
>the four of you make your way to the outer boundaries of Ponyville and gaze out into a gradient of thinning grass that seamlessly transitions into miles and miles of endless desert wasteland
>it really is a desert out there
"Well. Here we go."
/"Blood and iron!"
~"Yargh!"
_"AAAAAAHHHHHHH!"
>your three squadmates run out ahead of you, giggling like schoolfillies all the way
"H-hey! Wait for me!"
>you chase after them and get caught up in the revelry
>you stop where they stop, giggling and panting
>after a brief recovery, you look out at your new domain
>you gaze upon the wasteland