The Story of Cang Qiong Mountain: Return

The Story of Cang Qiong Mountain: Return

This TL will be updated with more extra parts as I complete them. (3/7 done).

1. The modern era!
“You absolutely, absolutely won’t find a trashier, more banal web novel than Proud Immortal Demon Way. I won’t respect anybody who likes that book. There’s definitely something wrong with their taste!!”
Shen Qingqiu was lying on a sickbed. He maintained a smile as the resident physician punctuated his tirade with enthusiastic gesticulations. Finally, when the resident finished procrastinating and bounced out of the hospital room, Shen Qingqiu turned his head to the side. He spoke in a monotone: “Well, that was a mistake. A PIDW hater. Look at the mess you’ve made.”
Shang Qinghua thumped onto the other hospital bed in despair. “Humiliating me…” he accused, screwing up his face as though on the verge of tears. “Cucumber bro, how could you watch someone humiliate me…”
Shen Qingqiu had a splitting headache. With an audible swish, he yanked closed the curtain that separated them. “Shut up!!”
It was a long story. Basically, on a certain day, Shen Qingqiu and Shang Qinghua received a notification from the System at the same time.
System: The System store is launching a special New Year’s gift package!
System: To recognize the host’s consistently extraordinary performance, you may exchange 50,000 satisfaction points to receive one “Homecoming Gift Pack”. The host may use it to return to their original world for one week.
What?
Shen Qingqiu was shocked. “Hold on, but haven’t I already died in the modern day? I can still go back? What happens if I go back?”
System: I can confirm that the user’s original body is not dead, just in shock.
What?!
So he didn’t die!!!
But food poising shouldn’t cause shock, right? Unless Proud Immortal Demon Way made him so angry that he went into shock…
Things had really become so complicated…
System: This is a limited time offer and cannot be used once it expires. Please decide whether to redeem it immediately.
How could he hesitate?!
After the shortest moment, Shen Qingqiu and Shang Qinghua acted at once: deal!
The two of them originally planned to study the gift pack after buying it, and when they figured it out, they would tactfully discuss the matter with Luo Binghe and Mobei-Jun before deploying it. But unfortunately, their plan hit a little snag.
This was the System’s fault. Every item it offered before had a “Confirm” popup asking “Use this item? Yes/No”. The effect would only trigger after you hit “Yes”.
But it actually skipped the reminder this time and activated the item as soon as they redeemed it!
As a result, their predicament caught them off-guard.
Shen Qingqiu (Shen Yuan)’s initial analysis yielded one piece of incredibly good news and one piece of incredibly bad news.
Incredibly good news: time moved much more slowly in this world than in the world of PIDW. Many years had passed in the book, but it had only been one day here.
Incredibly bad news: perhaps this meant that when he spent two days here, many years would pass in the PIDW world…
He really had no idea what Luo Binghe would do.
But since he was here, he had no way of contacting the other side. Shen Yuan’s headache was killing him. He was incredibly worried.
Even though he missed Luo Binghe deeply, he quickly adjusted his mindset.
Since things were out of his hands, he had to at least do his own share.
Shen Yuan never half-assed anything. He decided to devote his full attention to spending time with his family.
The gift pack was an incredible opportunity, after all, and it would only last for a limited time. He didn’t know when he would have this kind of opportunity again.
His one silver lining was discovering that Master Airplane was in the same hospital. He hadn’t been cast into the great heaving mass of humanity without so much as someone to strategize with.
After Shen Yuan had awakened and gone for a walk outside the VIP ward, he bumped into Shang Qinghua—who was holed up in a four-bed sickbay. It was (admittedly) just a little awkward.
He had been a shizun for so many years that he became accustomed to his affectations. He felt ill at ease without his fan. When Shen Yuan strolled around the hospital, elderly ladies and gentlemen would ask him for directions, and he chatted with them as he led them to the pharmacy. One of these times, he overheard an old, cane-wielding man exclaim to his (tardy) grandson: “What an extraordinary young man! Such a distinguished presence at such a young age, rare indeed! He’s well-educated, to be sure!”
Shen Yuan: “…”
Shang Qinghua, who had been electrocuted, suffered more severe injuries than Shen Yuan (food poisoning). His body still went numb sometimes.
Shen Yuan had yanked him out of the ordinary hospital ward, pulled some strings with the hospital, and added a bed to his own VIP room.
Thus, the two of them had a lot of time to talk to each other.
Shang Qinghua was flabbergasted. “Cucumber bro, you’re actually a trust fund kid? You’re not just handsome, you’re also a trust fund kid?”
Shen Yuan raised his eyebrows. “Is it that surprising?”
Shen Yuan hadn’t seen his original face in a long time. It was a reassuring sight.
His appearance and demeanor, according to his little sister, were incredibly deceptive. A visitor had brought Shen Yuan’s favorite lilies of the valley (yes, he knew they were poisonous) to his room; clusters of drooping lilies of the valley clung to Shen Yuan along with their slender leaves.
Shen Yuan was like a lily of the valley, carrying himself with natural and refreshing ease. He took a seat, casually draping his forearm over the railing, the very picture of an elegant and unhurried young aristocrat. Whoever saw him would certainly take him for a wealthy idler, a playboy, the life of the party (just kidding!).
So how could he be such a diehard hikikomori? What a scam!!
Shang Qinghua was completely confused. “Okay… so that’s why you could afford so many tips. And that’s why you had so much contempt for PIDW, it’s a little too mindless for a normie like you… but since you’re handsome and rich, why would you read a trashy piece of wish fulfillment like PIDW?”
This was the first time Shen Yuan had witnessed such an impressive self-own.
How did he think of these things!
Shen Yuan just couldn’t control himself, all right? He always bounced between two extremes when he read this book. One moment he thought it was garbage, and the next moment he thought the author seemed to be going somewhere. And then he would curse to the heavens that it really was garbage!
He didn’t want to talk about that. Time to change topics.
“So your real name is Xiang Fei,” Shen Yuan said.
Shang Qinghua nodded like a baby chick pecking at rice.
He guessed that this person was Shang Qinghua when he saw his name(*). But he found it quite difficult to believe, because… because Great Master Airplane’s real appearance wasn’t like he imagined at all.
No matter how you looked at it, Shang Qinghua was a handsome man.
But Xiang Fei was obviously a delicate-featured, quiet, shy, and introverted high schooler type! The kind that would get cornered and smacked by a huge, menacing class bully!
If you gave him a melancholic expression, a white T-shirt, a grey color scheme, and a set of meaningful props, you could put him straight onto the cover of an angsty YA novel!
Shen Yuan understood.
No wonder Airplane’s beauty standard for men was the handsome and haughty type, like Mobei-Jun. His own features had surely earned him no end of cheek pinching, so he naturally gravitated towards the kind of masculine features that made someone an alpha among alphas. Shen Yuan wasn’t a Mobei-jun anti (he really wasn’t). But he preferred Luo Binghe’s “Student Council President, top student” look.
Shen Yuan seized the opportunity to ask a question that had bothered him for a long time. “If you have such a normal name, why is your pen name so sleazy?”
“You can’t blame me for that, Cucumber bro.” Shang Qinghua sounded wounded. “It wasn’t that I wanted this pen name. I was a dumb kid who didn’t understand internet safety, so I originally wanted to just use my real name. But someone already took it. I tried “XiangFei1” all the way to “XiangFei12345”, and then I tried “XiangFeisFish”, “XiangFeisPig”, Xiang Fei’s dog, horse, ox, ram, all twelve animals in the zodiac, and I even tried “XiangFeiCantFindAUsername”. That one wasn’t taken, but it was too long. So I finally got mad and wrote a pen name that nobody else would pick. I just did it without thinking. All the decent names were taken! And really, Peerless Cucumber isn’t much better!”
Shen Yuan’s expression darkened. “Do you think I’m a pervert like you. It’s because back then, my little sister spent all her time at home watching some “Peerless Crown Prince’s Concubine” drama and yapping about it all day, and then she got me into binging PIDW until after midnight, and then I’d get hungry so late at night that I didn’t want to wake anyone up to cook for me, so I usually just chewed on cucumbers. So I had those two things on my mind and they corrupted my username!”
Shang Qinghua seized onto the wrong point entirely. Somehow, he was incredibly moved. His voice was thick with emotion when he said, “So, so you—Cucumber bro, you—this is how you think of me!...”
Shen Yuan couldn’t take it anymore. But, looking at Shang Qinghua’s original high-schooler face that seemed so bullyable, he also didn’t have the nerve to strike back. So he once again yanked the curtain shut between them.
The hospital phoned Shen Yuan’s family as soon as he woke up. His parents had tossed over their family business to their unfilial son a long time ago and entered a blissful semi-retirement. They immediately excused his teenage sister from high school and rushed to the hospital together.
When Shen Yuan saw his family, it took all his effort to hold back his tears.
How could he not have missed his family after spending so long in the PIDW universe?
But he was perfectly aware that, since he couldn’t change anything, all he could do was not miss them.
Because his pain would only intensify the more he missed them, he never dared to give himself even an instant to think about his family, always running around as though incredibly busy and overwhelmed.
His two older brothers hadn’t arrived. One of them was conducting research in icy Antarctica, and one was searching for aged tea trees in the mountains.
Shen Yuan missed them terribly, but the System would have sent him back by the time they crossed the world to rush to his side. He wouldn’t even have a chance to see them.
In any case, they had already dropped everything to visit him when the food poisoning initially struck him down. Making them do it again really wouldn’t be fair to their coworkers.
So they expressed their sympathies by sending him the photos they snapped of his “corpse”.
Shen Yuan found this incredibly moving. He tagged his two brothers in the family group chat, sent a torrent of emojis depicting cursing, vomiting, and beatings, and unleashed a firestorm of verbal abuse. For his efforts he received a pile of apology cash transfers.
His family had no objections about his desire to bring home a patient he happened to meet at the hospital. Shen Yuan’s little sister Shen Tang explained the situation without even looking up from her game. “That’s how it always is. When my brother was little, he’d bring home unwanted dogs and secretly bathe them, sneak them into his room, share his blanket with them, and then they’d give him bad dreams from sleeping on his chest.”
Shang Qinghua was initially confused why this was suddenly “how it always is”. Then he was touched that Cucumber Bro was so protective over little animals. Finally he saw the issue: Hello, am I just another one of Cucumber Bro’s strays??
Finally, after a full battery of tests, Shen Yuan received a clean bill of health and was allowed to go home with large bouquets tucked under his arms.
Of course, Shen Yuan had paid for Shang Qinghua to undergo the same battery of tests. Shang Qinghua was returning to his rental apartment after being discharged.
Before they parted, Shen Yuan (after thinking it over) addressed Xiang Fei: “Do you want to come home with me? My house isn’t huge, but we have room for you.”
He knew Master Airplane lived alone, was the thing, and his family didn’t really care about him. Nobody visited him the whole time he was in the hospital.
Airplane was so unpredictable that he could even electrocute himself while eating instant noodles. What if he got himself killed again, and nobody found him…
He thought that Airplane’s expression looked touched and conflicted for a moment. But Airplane laughed. “So you do love me, Cucumber Bro! But you don’t have much time. You should spend it with your family. I’m going back to work.”
Shen Yuan didn’t want to object to this so-called “love”, so he said, “All right, you go and work, I’ll come and find you in two days.”
 As for what he would work on, of course (Airplane said) he was hurrying to eat his beloved instant noodles… no, he was going to edit his manuscript and write an extra for Proud Immortal Demon Way!
Shen Yuan’s expectations were on the floor. The worst thing for a wildly popular novel was writing a sequel or extra after many years. It was a thankless task. Readers usually had just one thing to say: it’s not the same anymore!
There was no avoiding it. Even if the author hadn’t changed at all, the readers couldn’t stay the same forever. Each of them moved forward on different paths; how could they expect to meet again?
All this to say that he suspected Airplane would bring a big storm indeed…

*Airplane’s true name has been revealed as 向飞 (Xiang Fei). These characters appear in his screenname 向天打飞机 (Airplane Shooting Towards the Sky).

2. Binghe!
Shen Yuan didn’t return to the suburban villa he occupied before he was hospitalized. Instead, he went to the large downtown apartment that belonged to his family. The idea was that it would be easy to send him back to the hospital if necessary.
The 95th floor boasted a stunning view of the river by day, and a sea of city lights at night.
That evening, the Shen household blazed with light. Their table was laden with takeout dishes. The family gathered to celebrate their third son leaving the hospital in good health.
Though Shen Yuan overflowed with happiness, deep down, he gave a little sigh.
He didn’t know how to explain to his family that, after a few days, he might fall asleep again. He definitely didn’t know what kind of state Luo Binghe must have worked himself into by now.
As soon as Shen Yuan’s expression flickered for an instant, his mom noticed. “What’s wrong? Does it still hurt anywhere?”
Shen Yuan laughed a little. “No, I’m fine, I just ate a bit too much.”
Suddenly, the doorbell rang.
In that instant, Shen Yuan felt his heart tug on him. He didn’t know why he felt such an irrational sense of anticipation. Shen Tang ran to open the door, but she came back almost immediately.
“Your friend came to see you,” she said to Shen Yuan incredulously.
Friend?
Shen Yuan’s family knew all his friends, so his sister shouldn’t have been so surprised. To make her react this way, surely it wasn’t…
Shen Yuan walked to the door, speeding up as he went—he was in such a hurry that he almost tripped. Luckily, someone’s hand shot out to steady him.
He looked up and saw a face of unsurpassed loveliness.
Luo Binghe was looking down at him, the alarm in his eyes eclipsed by overwhelming joy.
Shen Yuan almost stopped breathing. He looked at Luo Binghe, and then he looked at his family. A thousand thoughts battled in his mind.
First of all, he had to thoroughly comfort Luo Binghe—he must have been worried sick!
But on the other hand, how am I going to introduce Luo Binghe to my family?
Suddenly, sirens started blaring in his mind. The most important thing of all.
Because he remembered: this was his original appearance.
Now that he’d changed his appearance, Luo Binghe might not be able to recognize who he was!
But he quickly realized that he’d miscalculated.
Because Luo Binghe stared right at him with exactly, precisely the same expression as before.
Shen Yuan knew that he had definitely been recognized without either of them saying a single word.
The whole group stood in this awkward silence. Except for Luo Binghe, who wouldn’t look away from Shen Yuan, everyone looked at each other in bewilderment. They didn’t know why the atmosphere suddenly became so serious.
Shen Yuan burst out with, “Hold on, I’ll handle it!”
He pulled Luo Binghe into his own room with almost supernatural speed.
“Shizun.”
Luo Binghe drew in a breath. Quietly, he said, “I knew it was shizun.”
“How did you find your way here?” Shen Yuan asked.
“Some days after shizun’s sudden disappearance, Mobei came to find me, saying that the An Ding peak lord had vanished too. We spent some time trying a few different methods. It was only months later that we traced the location of your two souls.”
He described it briefly, with an unperturbed expression. But Shen Yuan knew that his “some time” and “a few different methods” must have involved the most strenuous difficulties.
“Mobei-jun came as well?”
“Yes. He’s gone to find the An Ding peak lord.”
He hoped the shock wouldn’t make Great Master Airplane spill his noodles and electrocute himself again.
“Then, will the two of you be able to go back?”
If he and Shang Qinghua went back, but Luo Binghe and Mobei-jun couldn’t return, they’d be in a real pickle!
“Shizun need not worry,” Luo Binghe said calmly. “This disciple has bound our souls. When your soul returns, mine will go with it. I go wherever shizun goes."
Shen Yuan finally relaxed. That’s good, they wouldn’t end up like star-crossed lovers in a tragedy…
But why? How could a fictional world cross into the real world???
He couldn’t figure it out immediately, so he decided to first tackle the problem at hand. “How did you recognize…. I mean…”
When he returned to the real world, he quickly reverted to his ordinary manner, and now he was embarrassed to say “this master”. Luo Binghe laughed.
“Of course I did. Even if shizun’s appearance changed, I can recognize you immediately.”
Shen Yuan sighed deeply. He began to consider how to explain the situation to Luo Binghe.
Perhaps because a part of him always knew that this day might came, this only took a few seconds.
“Binghe, you might have a few questions,” Shen Yuan said calmly.
But Luo Binghe was even calmer than he was.
He tilted his head and asked, confused: “Shizun, what questions could I have?”
“Aren’t you even a little confused? For example, about why I would be here? Why I look like this?”
Luo Binghe seemed to find his words more confusing than anything else. “Is there anything to be confused about? Isn’t shizun here because this is your original world? As for why shizun would look like this, isn’t it because this is your original appearance?”
Shen Yuan was stunned.
A crack appeared in his calm expression. “You… you knew all along?”
Luo Binghe smiled. “Of course.”
So Luo Binghe knew already that he wasn’t from that world, and that he was somebody else!
Shen Yuan still felt uneasy. “When… did you figure it out?”
“Very early,” Luo Binghe replied.
“How early is very early?”
Luo Binghe responded slowly. “I became certain the first time the demons attacked Cang Qiong Mountain and shizun sent me out to challenge Elder Tianchui.”
Luo Binghe was exceptionally intelligent indeed.
How long ago was it that he had sent Luo Binghe to fight Elder Tianchui? If Luo Binghe hadn’t mentioned it, he would’ve forgotten Elder Tianchui’s name completely. How old was Luo Binghe? Only about fourteen?
He could put together clues even at such a young age…
Luo Binghe continued, “But I first began to suspect it after what happened at Shuang Hu City. Shizun’s soul arrived before that, right?”
A perfectly correct time frame!
But Shen Yuan didn’t expect that Luo Binghe had deduced much more than this.
Luo Binghe locked eyes with Shen Yuan. “After Shuang Hu City, I realized that shizun had changed already. Shizun suffered a high fever not long before on Qing Jing Peak, and everything changed after the fever went down. If shizun asked me what exactly had changed... first you had me whipped, and then you gave me medicine. This was strange, wasn’t it?”
His probing gaze seemed to ask, did I guess right?
After a beat, Shen Yuan released a sign. “You…have deduced it. That was when this master…. I arrived.”
Luo Binghe beamed, as though a weight had been lifted after many years.
“I’ve finally admitted everything to you, face to face. This is the first time we’ve really seen each other, shizun.” He sighed.
A moment of silence. Then Shen Yuan said, “Since you already knew everything, why did you never mention it?”
“What’s the point of mentioning such an unimportant, trivial thing?” Luo Binghe said, baffled.
“Since you didn’t tell me, doesn’t it prove that shizun didn’t want to talk about it? If you didn’t want to talk about it, why should I bring it up and make you unhappy?”
“Isn’t this…” Shen Yuan spoke with difficulty. “…important?”
“Of course,” Luo Binghe said calmly. “The most important thing is that shizun came, not where shizun came from. Isn’t it?”
Shen Yuan really couldn’t hold himself back. “But didn’t you suspect, didn’t you think I wasn’t your shizun…”
Luo Binghe laughed. “Shizun, what are you saying?” His voice was quiet. “You know better than anyone that I only have one shizun. Who would it be if not you? Who raised me? Who guided me with his whole heart? Does shizun take his disciple for an ignorant, undiscerning imbecile?”
Well, no. He just didn’t think that you would take it so well. He had underestimated Luo Binghe after all. He expected that he’d have to administer a little psychological counseling…
Shen Yuan’s original panic slowly dissipated, leaving behind the relaxation of having worked through a serious issue.
He realized that Luo Binghe was looking straight at him. Luo Binghe’s gaze was so intensely earnest that it weighed on Shen Yuan like a mountain, and he felt that he couldn’t endure it any longer.
People had looked at him his whole life, but Luo Binghe was the first to attain such open audacity!
He coughed. “We can’t stay here forever. I’ll take you to meet my family.”
Those words made Luo Binghe light up. “All right!”
Shen Yuan was speechless in the face of his radiance.
Shen Yuan changed Luo Binghe into a set of his own clothes. As soon as they left the room, Shen Yuan heard his mom saying, “It’s perfectly normal for young people to do that these days. Very fashionable. Even I’ve heard of it; it’s called “cosplay”. Why are you staring at him like that? Don’t be so old fashioned!”
His dad was brewing tea. “How am I old fashioned? I know about ‘play’. I’m just admiring how good his ‘play’ looks. What’s wrong with that?”
His sister glanced up from her game. “Stop arguing, they’re done ‘playing’. They’re coming out.”
The three of them turned to look in unison.
“Do we have any more bowls and chopsticks? I’ll get some,” Shen Yuan said.
His mom showed him where to find them. “Hey kid, is that your friend?” His dad asked.
“No. He’s my disciple, Luo Binghe,” Shen Yuan said.
Luo Binghe perfectly delivered the line Shen Yuan taught him, but for some reason (and without permission) he was blushing furiously. “Hello, auntie and uncle.”
“Hello, hello—so this is xiao Luo!” His mom said warmly. “Sit down, sit down.”
“Your disciple?” His sister asked incredulously. “Where did you get a disciple? What do you teach him? Are you sure he’s not just your junior classmate?”
Shen Yuan forged ahead shamelessly. “I taught him to play a little hack and slash cultivation video game. I’m second-in-command of the biggest guild, so we have to recruit a lot of new players. We have an offline event this week, and Binghe’s going to ‘cos’… he’s going to ‘cosplay’ the game’s ‘boss’. He came to show me his outfit today. He’s also going to perform, so I have to help him rehearse his lines. So, he’s going to stay here with me for the next couple days.”
“Ah, I see.” His mom smiled. “Well, xiao Luo’s ‘play’ looks very handsome. Good luck on your performance.”
Shen Yuan had a very hard time holding back his laughter. “Of course he’s handsome. Why else would we pick him to cosplay?”
Luo Binghe seemed to understand. He was still blushing. “Thank you for the praise, auntie, but my looks have little to recommend me. Shizun is the only unparalleled beauty in my heart.”
“Binghe is an accomplished scholar of historical literature,” Shen Yuan said to his parents, smoothly. “This is just how he talks; it takes a little while to get used to.”
“Oh, yes.”
“Very cultured, not like other kids these days.”
Shen Yuan was most worried about his sister seeing through their act, but so far it was all right.
They sat down to eat. His sister glanced at Luo Binghe, perhaps thinking that his long hair would get in his way. After some thought, she took a hairtie off her wrist and handed it to him. “Here, you can borrow this.”
Luo Binghe said a polite and sincere “thank you”, accepted it, and began to study this rubber band adorned with a cotton puppy. The bib-wearing puppy looked very foolish. He didn’t seem confused, but Shen Yuan took the hairtie just in case. “Let me do it.”
He stood and came closer. Luo Binghe sat obediently, resting both hands on his thighs, his posture as proper as the caricature of a good student. He looked like nothing so much as an expectant elementary schooler.
Shen Yuan helped tie up Luo Binghe’s long hair, planning to make a salon appointment tomorrow for Luo Binghe’s haircut. Not bad, he thought when he was done. Pretty cute, actually. Luo Binghe was just the kind of person cute things were made for. Shen Yuan couldn’t stop laughing until he went back to his seat.
“When did you start playing this game? What game is it? I want to play too,” Shen Tang interrogated him.
“Playing those games is a complete waste of time. You should focus on school,” Shen Yuan said.
Shen Tang was baffled. “Ever since you came back from the hospital, it feels like you’ve been an elementary school teacher for a whole decade. Am I imagining it?”
“Yes, yes, I think so too!” His mom said.
“Anyway, I studied very hard when I was your age,” Shen Yuan said.
“I get good grades, you don’t have to worry,” Shen Tang said. “Besides, so what if you studied hard then? Don’t you game all day now? What’s the difference?”
Unbeatable, truly unbeatable! No wonder she sat at the top of the family food chain. Shen Yuan bowed in surrender. He saw the corners of Luo Binghe’s mouth curve into a smile.
What are you smiling at?
Shen Qingqiu would certainly have lifted his fan if he had one. This insubordinate disciple!
His mom looked over at Luo Binghe. Startled, she said, “Hey, isn’t this Dumdum?”
Luo Binghe was confused. Everyone at the table looked at Luo Binghe as well, at the dog on his hairtie.
His dad pushed up his glasses. “It looks like Dumdum. He’s even got that ugly bib, the one our middle child was always tying on him.”
Shen Yuan glared. “First, that bib wasn’t ugly, it’s the best looking one I ever made. Second, of course it looks like him. I commissioned someone to make him and gave them Dumdum’s photo.”
“Who’s Dumdum?” Only Luo Binghe was left in the dark.
Shen Tang explained it to him very seriously. “A dog my brother used to have. My parents wouldn’t let us keep dogs, but when he was in sixth grade, he found a dog on the side of the road that got hit by a car. He snuck it in, wrapped bandages around it like a dumpling, fed his own food to the dog, and let it sleep in his bed. And the dog almost crushed him to death sleeping on his chest.”
“Shen Tang,” said Shen Yuan, “Can you not tell this story every time I introduce you to someone? It’s not that interesting.”
Luo Binghe was very earnest. “But shizun, I think it’s very interesting. I want to hear it! Would you all please tell me more?”

3. A day in the life!
Shen Yuan rose bright and early on the third day.
No point in sleeping in when he only had so much time.
He made an appointment with a stylist and drove Luo Binghe to get his hair cut.
Shen Yuan exhaled in wonder. The protagonist was the protagonist indeed. His features… truly mogged! Many male idols could only play one role in historical or costume dramas. If someone’s face lacked that “it” factor, they would have to be styled a certain way to make up for it. Their appearance dictated what kind of vibe they could conjure.
But Luo Binghe’s face didn’t have a single bad angle. Shen Yuan suspected that he would still look handsome with a crew cut, but he steered himself away from conducting this wicked experiment. In his aesthetic judgement, the crew cut belonged lower than the eighteenth level of hell. He decided to give Luo Binghe a cool, normal short cut.
He issued all kinds of enthusiastic directions the whole time. Thin it out a little here, make the bangs a little wispier, even short hair needs a sense of movement… Luo Binghe watched him all the while, and found his various suggestions very interesting indeed.
Luo Binghe originally wore Shen Yuan’s clothes, but he was taller than Shen Yuan and didn’t fit them. So, Shen Yuan dug out some of his brother’s college clothes.
Luo Binghe transformed from black-robed demon lord to a college student in a white button-up.
Even the simplest style was lethal indeed. Luo Binghe stuck a hand into his pocket, unconsciously striking a pose. He glanced at himself in the mirror—what an unusual style. “Shizun, do you like this kind of look?”
Shen Yuan adjusted Luo Binghe’s belt and re-buckled it in a different position. He then meticulously rolled up the sleeves, revealing an elegant yet strong wrist. After assessing it for a while, he said breezily, “Not bad.”
Like it?
What a joke.
The male protagonist Luo Binghe was incomparably stunning, all right?
Luo Binghe had won over Shen Yuan’s mom within less than a day.
He busied himself in the kitchen around noon, doing everything on his own. Shen Yuan’s mom popped in to take a look, tasted a little, and promptly praised him to high heaven. She exclaimed many times that, “Xiao Luo’s future wife will be so lucky!”
“Thank you, auntie.” Luo Binghe responded with a bashful manner and a flushed face. “Binghe hopes so as well.”
Shen Yuan was watching the news in the other room, but his frequent glances at the kitchen left him extremely baffled. Why was he getting such a strange feeling from this family?!
Shen Yuan wanted to make Luo Binghe experience modern society that evening, along with organizing a family outing.
Thus, the family sallied forth en masse.
Shen Yuan conjured up some adorable scenes in his mind. For instance, Luo Binghe would see something he didn’t recognize and look up at Shen Yuan timidly, just like Dumdum. Without his smiling encouragement, Luo Binghe wouldn’t dare approach further. Then, he would patiently instruct Luo Binghe, like teaching a child. After all, there wasn’t much Shen Yuan could teach Luo Binghe after he’d grown up. Let him enjoy being a shizun again!
He awkwardly discovered that he had overthought things. The stereotypes he conjured up didn’t go much farther.
He could only sigh again, “Truly the protagonist.” Luo Binghe could learn and adapt to a terrifying degree. While Shen Yuan slept, Luo Binghe gathered his world-destroying faculties—and studied all night. The Luo Binghe that Shen Yuan saw the next morning was no longer that curious child from last night.
At the speed of light, he had mastered this world like the back of his hand. He read through all of Shen Yuan’s study materials, from his elementary school textbooks to the specialized texts for his college major. He even summoned Meng Mo, who had enjoyed a blissful retirement for many years, to conjure up a temporary time-distortion zone, and he’d binged some website’s entire “top 250” movie list!
What was this? Even the native-born Shen Yuan hadn’t read all that!
But even though Luo Binghe had now gained some understanding about the modern world, Shen Yuan’s opinions had shifted.
For instance, Shen Yuan discovered this issue:
Someone from a low-fantasy xianxia world wouldn’t necessarily think much of the modern world.
Airplanes?
Spiritual beasts could fly, and swords could fly; what was so impressive about airplanes? Didn’t they have high-volume sword arrays?
TV?
It didn’t elicit the expected reaction of, “Wow! This multicolored board has so many moving people in it! How marvelous!” Their low-fantasy world had Soul-Seeking Spirit Mirrors that served similar purposes. And those mirrors could actually show real events. The most mediocre cultivator with the tiniest inkling of ability could say, “I want to see a Ghost-Head Spider lay eggs!” It would instantly let you watch to your heart’s desire.
Internet?
Now why would someone want to argue with so many strangers on a screen? What was the point? If you had a problem with someone in the xianxia world, you hopped on a sword and KO’d them offline. Wasn’t that honorable, upright, and awesome?
Shen Yuan felt that he had lost a great source of joy.
Even movies didn’t seem to hold much interest for Luo Binghe.
The big screen was essentially a medium for vicariously experiencing exciting spectacles, but in the xianxia world, you could fly there and see the real thing.
If you wanted to see a spectacle, Luo Binghe could produce one out of thin air.
Plus, this movie was very bad.
How could it feature even worse writing than Great Master Airplane’s!
Between wave after of wave of special effects (more like light pollution), Shen Yuan snuck a glance at Luo Binghe. His expression revealed very little.
He felt a great deal of suspicion. Such a large crowd sitting in this dark room just to watch moving pictures, and with such excitement, for what? Only when Shen Yuan looked at him, and their eyes met, did his gaze soften.
The only comfort was that at least… at least Luo Binghe really enjoyed eating popcorn. Shen Yuan was able to satisfy his nurturing impulse.
After the movie, their group went for a walk by the river.
Shen Yuan discussed the movie with his parents, heaping harsh criticisms upon it. When he looked back, he suddenly noticed that Luo Binghe was silently watching them talk and laugh with a small smile. His eyes held an indecipherable meaning.
Shen Yuan slowed down until he was walking next to Luo Binghe.
“From your reaction, I guess you thought it was boring too,” Shen Yuan said.
Luo Binghe tilted his head. He asked in surprise, “Does it matter to shizun if I find this world interesting?”
Did it matter? Surely at least somewhat.
It didn’t bruise his ego or anything; Shen Yuan never had that kind of superiority mindset.
Shen Yuan thought about it. He sighed. “Since you happened to come all this way, of course I(*) hoped I could show you something interesting.”
Otherwise… he felt he had lost a bit of standing as a shizun.
Luo Binghe looked down. He smiled and said mildly, “Even though this world has many uninteresting aspects… but this is the only world that birthed shizun’s soul, isn’t it?”
They stopped walking.
Luo Binghe looked at Shen Yuan. The reflection of the lights on the river shone in his eyes, along with Shen Yuan’s image. “As long as that’s true, it is exceptional indeed,” he said.
Shen Yuan was a little dumbstruck.
“This is enough to make me want to understand it better,” Luo Binghe said. “So, shizun doesn’t need to worry whether I find these things interesting.”
He didn’t find this world interesting for its external properties, but rather for the existence of a certain person.
This world had a blank check from the very beginning.
Shen Yuan blinked a few times, coughed, and said, “That’s enough. This… I understand what you mean.” After some internal wrestling, he added, “But don’t study too hard.”
Leave him a few teaching opportunities! It wasn’t good for a child to love studying too much.
Luo Binghe smiled and nodded. “This disciple understands.”
Shen Yuan was just about to express his reserved approval when he heard, behind him, the sound of someone slurping on a straw.
He looked back. At some point, his sister had caught up to them. She watched them while biting on her Coca-Cola straw.
Luo Binghe was completely unruffled, but Shen Yuan thought there was something off about the way she looked at them.
“What are you looking at?” He said.
His sister slurped down the entire drink, stomped down on the can, picked it up, and threw it into the garbage bin. She tucked both hands into her pockets, apparently thinking very hard about something.
Finally, she spoke at a low volume. “Don’t be afraid, I’ll help you hide it. Actually I always knew you were probably going to die alone. But I didn’t think this type of development was possible…”
This brat! Don’t curse your brother like that!!
What did she mean, she always knew! He wasn’t such an incurable nerd! He was just half a nerd! In fact, he was a normie!!

(*) I used “I” here to preserve flow, but in general, Shen Yuan avoids first person pronouns when speaking with Binghe. He defaults to “this master” and often trips up before saying the right modern pronoun (“I”).