Thread 97: Stories 1-15

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OOCO
>SA
"Chrysalis"
'AJ'
~~~~

>Now, the first step to being friends is a mutual goal. We all understand that, right? A mutual goal that we can all move towards, and work together to reach as a team! Now, who's feeling goal oriented, hmm?

"...help me fuck Shining Armor."

>CHRYSALIS!

'NO!'

"Well I'm not helping you fuck Spike!"

'AH' DON'T WANT YA' TO!'

"Good! I'm not!'

'Good!'

"Good!'"

"'GOOOD!""

>...well, we technically achieved a goal-

"How about Rarity?"

'Ya' wanna fuck RARITY!? WHAT!?

"Not me, you."

'Oh....'

"...."

>....

'...Er, Ah' mean, no!'

"What? She's legal."

'Isn't the point!'

"Well, yeah, of course she doesn't have one of those, but I figured we'd just buy a toy-"

'Ah'm onboard.'

>WHATWHATWHATWHATWHAT-

'Shhhh, trust me.... Chrysalis? Ah' ain't got onna them thar toys, can ya' get me one?'

"Sure."

>APPLEJACK WHAT-

'SHHH! We're gonna watch her walk inta' a store ta' buy a... you know! This is gonna be gold! Ah'm gonna cherish this fer-"

FWOOSH!

'....'

>...forgot about that, eh?

'...hopes... shattered...'

>...does she look like you?

'CHRYSALIS YOU COME BACK HERE RIGHT NOW!'

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NCadditon
>Chrysalis
"AJ"
'Store Pony'
~~~~

>Hi, I would like your biggest strap on? Preferably with a double ender attachment.

'...P...princess Applejack?'

>What? What gave you-

*SLAM!*
*tingle!*

"NOW YOU GET AWAY FROM THAT COUNTER TOP RIGHT NOW!"

>I'm getting it, I said! You asked me to buy this for you! This is a favor! I'm sure as hell not getting anything out of this!

"Ah' know what Ah' said but get away!"

>What's the problem here!? What, did you want to bring Rarity in here and shop around? It's all fake anyway!

"Ah' didn't say ta' do it while lookin' like me ya' idgit!"

>I don't!

"WHAT!? Ya' look exactly like me!

'No she doesn't.'

"YA'LL STAY OUT OF THIS!"

>I don't!

"How do ya' figure!?"

'No wings or horn.'

"........."
'...'
>...

"...oh... oh right... uh... right, that's how Ah' used ta' look, but now Ah' gotta..."

>...

'...'

"C-...carry on!"

*SLAM!*
*tingle!*

>...Carry on buying you a fucking strapon double ender? Fucking... fine, whatever. Sure Rarity will appreciate it.

'...Erm P-princess Applejack and R-rarity are... are...'

>Today, asshole.

'... that'll be sixteen ninety-'

"WAIT A DAMN MINUTE!... OH FUCK!"

>Huh... guess she got started early.

'T-TOO HOT!'

*THUMP!*

>And down he goes.

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 >Lavan
"???"
'???'

>-Stalliongrad! Stalliongrad! You very nice place! From southern border to northern fence of Deertown! Stalliongraaaad greatest country in the woooorld-!

"I think we've listened enough, mate."

>Aw, but this was the part where the entire song starts over! It's my favorite.

"Ya realize you're in a whole different hemisphere, aye?"

>...yes. Yes I was aware. I most certainly did NOT lose track of direction while singing that song.

Above the stars twinkled.

>Quiet, you! You can't see it but I'm point accusingly with my fingers that don't currently exist!

'...what the hell do we do about this?'

"Why ya asking me?"

'Because you're the-excuse me-Lord Admiral High Mayor Esquire For Life.'

"...it's an honorary position.

'Bollocks it is, Rat.'

"Okay! I am going to do the leaderlh thing and delegate. Doc, figure out what to do!"

'Bite me ya-...hi.'

>Hello!

"OH FAUST WHY DO YOU HAVE TWO EYES NOW!?"

>I'm putting myself back together! Nice ship by the way!

"Aw, ya like it? I got it from a friend. The 'ole Widow's Regret, it's quite a beauty."

>You know what'd make it better? Flight.

"What, like, strap a balloon to it? Tried that once, Doc crushed that dream."

'You're the one who didn't understand you couldn't just blow it up with your mouth.'

>I can make it fly! Watch!

"'...'"

"Huh."

'It's just...floating.'

"Regular Flying Hutchmare that is."

'...it's not coming down.'

"...uhhhhhhh..."

'Weren't our last haul still in there?'

"GRAPPLING HOOKS! SOMEONE GET GRAPPLING HOOKS!"

>Grappling hooks. This pleases me.

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 >SA
"18"
~~~~

>...So you think she's going to fill us in on literally any of that?

"I hope so. I am... so lost."

>...Forty Two did just teleport, right? That was a thing?

"That was indeed a thing."

>I uh... I thought-

"Yes, that is supposed to be one hundred percent, T totally, impossible. That is a Queen only move."

>...And Forty Two... ISN'T a secret Queen, right?

"..."

>I feel the need to ask.

"I am so lost."

>...Soooo... what do you think Caddy said to her?

"I'm... not sure I want to know."

>...

"Shiny?"

>Mmmhmmm?

"You know how we got interrupted?"

>Yep.

"Well, it's just, she's fine now, everything is fine, we don't need to worry, sooooo...I know it would be a lot to ask for a full on, but can I at least get a cheek-"

~Cheeksmooch!~

"Duhhhlhlllllhhhhh-"

>I enjoy you making that face way more than I should.

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>Twilight
"Rarity"
~~~~

>...

Tacktacktacktacktacktacktack-

"Darling, whatever are you doing in here on such a lovely day?"

>I'm working on analyzing the readouts from the Orb Chrysalis created out of the memories of Variolus.

"Ohhh, the one that make AJ go a bit... nutty, shall we say, and powerbomb everyone?"

>That one.

"Ah... and you see no problem with the fact this is in Chrysalis's custody?"

>Nope.

"...Well, they said you were smart, nobody ever said you were sane."

>Or I just realized that, as a mind controlling powerful changeling, she is better equipped to handle mind controlling orbs than I am.

"...Twilight? Darling? I think you need to lie down."

>I'm serious. I'm smart, Rarity, but I don't know anything about mind control, or Queen magic.

"Really?... Even though, you know, you've been studying her for a year now?"

>I've mostly been studying the changelings, not her. And for good reason after that whole... thing!

"I suppose... still, feels a little unsettling."

>Well, it shouldn't. She's fine. She just wants her changelings to be... you know, like us. We kind of take for granted we're not on the endangered species list here.

"And who's fault is that?"

>...Touché. Still... I need to examine this thing with her help so I don't get corrupted.

"And?"

>...and mayyybe I want to know how to turn off supersizing bugs that I not only let out, but then gave back the ability to supersize, that would be nice.

"That's more like it. So... I actually wanted opinions on this how do these stockings look?"

>Spike will love it.

"You're not even looking!"

>...And?

"...Touché to you, Twilight Sparkle, Touché to you..."

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>Dash
"Rarity"
'LD'
~~~~~

"Dash, I must say, this was simply brilliant!"

Her praise, even as loud as it was, was nearly drowned out by the cheers all around, of ponies screaming with joy at watching the 'new' Wonderbolts fly overhead. The grin on the white alicorn was so wide it seemed to reach her ears, yet Dash for the life of her could not tell if it was due to enjoying the show or the rather large collection of bits by the wayside.

All of this would be well enough, both the airshow and the proper funds being raise, but they weren't merely doing airspectacle alone. No, they had also added yet another twist on top of this.

Dangerous stormclouds, normally caused by overdoing it on the creation with hot or cold, which ran the risk of creating uncontrolled tornados with their presence, were being dramatically destroyed in the air, defeated by a collection of intuned air battle formations that looked more like a daring fight than it did what it really was, which was glorified cleanup of hazardous materials.

They had essentially turned the air equivalent of a landfill dump into a spectacle that was raking in enough bits to fund their new outfits, and more besides.

>Heh... yeah, this was... pretty smart.

"However did you come up with this?... Ahem, not to say you're not a brilliant sort of course, it's just this one is particularly so?"

>Well, actually-

'Boss came up with it from your idea, Ms Rarity. She just kinda flew with it and came up with this.'

"Simply marvelous! I knew I was an amazing muse!"

It had not escaped her that Lightning Dust was not taking any credit, and the explanation why made sense. Public perception, is what she said, to look like Dash was really succeeding without the other seniors to hold her back.

Still, she figured she could tell Rarity...

"Darling, would you make sure the concessions are working alright? We're making such a profit with them!"

'Right away, princess!'

"Delightful!... Ohhhh, yes... someone called me Princess..."

>...

"Shut up, I can enjoy it."

>Suuuure.

"So... how are you enjoying your 'new age'?"

>...It's pretty...

The cheers, the crowd, the spectacle, was deafening. It was all for her, and it was all for the right reasons. It was all good.

>....It's pretty awesome.

Finally.

Only took a year, but at last things were finally turning around.

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Non-Canon
>Pinkie
"AJ"
~~~~
>Welcome to Not Late Night /pa/ with your host Pinkie Pie! It's during this time that content does matter, but I like contributing in my own way! Now for our main guest...APPLEJACK!!!
Applause.

"Howdy folks."

>Do you ever sometimes wish you can go on a power mad rampage?

"What? No no...well sometimes.

>There you have it! Expect a great purge some time in the future!

"Wait, don't leave on that note!"

>Don't worry. It's not like people are going to take that seriously.

AJ wakes up.
"...that'll be for the tabloids to decide."

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>DT
"???"
~~~

>...This is too frumpy, this is too silly, this is too thick, this is too thin, this is too fat, this is too slimming, this isn't nearly slimming enough...

Some might find it extremely presumptuous of a filly to be looking through bridesmaid dresses long before the couple had even made their announcements to her and even settled on a theme, but if there was one thing Diamond Tiara was, that was probably it.

>What do you think, Sexy?

Her beloved weapon, now sporting a very auspicious black and white color theme to match a certain article of fancy clothing, had very little to add but to shift ever so slightly against the wall 'he' was propped up against.

>Pfft, figures you would say that. So easy for the MALES isn't it, just get a fancy tux and we're all good! But we actually have to look pretty... and I know, I know, I'm always the most beautiful mare in the world, but occasionally I have to prove it though more than just my face. Ponies have to look at... like... the rest of me sometimes. Like when I'm walking away because they're not worth my time. Heh, right!?

She held up her hoof, and coincidentally gravity took hold at that second and slid him down to match her for a hoofbump. That he had started to slide a few milliseconds earlier than when she had held it up was pure coincidence, of course.

>You know it... Oh, Sexy, you're the only one who understands me sometimes. Anyone else would have been offended.

"I wouldn't have."

The door to the private dressing room opened before she could even register someone had spoken, and with a brazen authority to her another mare strode in without a single care in the world.

"But then, I like to think I'm worth your time, call me egotistical."

Were it anyone else, she would have huffed, been offended, been angry that they dared they had strode in on her while she was trying out clothing! Anyone except for her.

Pennydrop.

..And she guessed Silver Spoon, after thinking about it. Or obviously Daddy. Or... well, Forty Two wouldn't be a problem, she doesn't know anything about fashion but she did get her back on the A-team, she'd go to bat for her once or twice. Probably Seventy Seven, since she was technically kinda shopping for him. Or... Spike? Depends on what she was wearing.

She had a weirdly large number of individuals who she would have been okay with them entering in while she was putting on new clothing.

>And just what do you think you're doing?

"Helping a friend... ho ho hooo! Now that is a sharp looking piece of heavy artillery!"

Instinctively, she wrapped her hooves around his slender metal body, holding him close to her while she glared her little pink heart out at the older mare.

"Alright, alright, calm down, no need to worry, mare-code dictates I'm not allowed to flirt with any heavy munitions belonging to another friend until six months after you break up, and you seem like a committed couple... though hopefully this dress is for someone ELSE'S wedding. I do not even know if that is legal, and I do not want to know."

>HRMPH! Obviously it's for a friend!... So, what help are you giving to me? Is it fashion advice? Because I'll have you know I know the princess of fashion, literally!

"Me? Nah, I wear business suits for a living, I know about as much about fashion as a yak."

>Needlessly racist.

"Tell me you've ever seen a well dressed yak."

>...I didn't say it wasn't true.

"But no, no no no... here."

She dropped a folder before her, stuffed to the brim with a load of photos.

Photos that looked like they were recording an earthquake in progress, but both knew better.

"It seems our 'mutual friend' has gotten back into the swing of things! Surely we should congratulate her."

The filly's teeth sparked as she grinded them together, cutting over a glace to the still resting, yet seemingly moving ever so slightly, weapon.

>I'll get a fruit basket.

"Fantastic, and while you're getting her all sorts of delicious vitamins, I was wondering if you wanted to see how our 'project' is coming along. Not that she would ever give you a reason to use it, of course."

The folder flipped open further, revealing quite a lot more pictures. These ones, however, took away the frown, and replaced it with a wild grin.

>So, you've been listening to me?

"Of course, friends listen to their friends, don't they?"

>That they do... so, how close is it to being done?

"Close, very close. There was a slight delay due to... issues, but I'm here to sort those out."

>The robots?

"NOT OUR FAULT!"

>...Uh huh.

"...Ahem... point is, time is fast approaching you might finally get your revenge, are you going to be... up to it?"

There was never any doubt, and Pennydrop never expected it. She was too full of herself to even dream that she wouldn't be ready, when the time came.

>Just make sure YOUR part is done, and try to let the professionals do it this time?

"Heh... professionals, I like that... finally evening the playing field, Diamond Tiara, how does it feel?"

As if listening to her commands, the large rocket launcher once more slid down from it's perch against the wall, and into her grasp.

>...Feels like how it's supposed to be.

"Good. Well, I suppose I should be off, simply wished to give you an update... have fun at the wedding, Diamond Tiara."

>Oh, I will.

"And come see me sometime in my resort, we never spend enough time together."

>...I'll think about it.

"Atta girl. Good day, Diamond Tiara, stay sharp, TBDRLIATU."

The first time anyone, anywhere, had said his name right. And yet, for some reason, it felt so... wrong. So wrong, she didn't say a word when the other mare left.

>...hrm.. so! Bridesmaid dresses!... No, I know I look sexy in everything, but which one looks the SEXIEST?.. You can't just say all of them!

The rocket launcher said nothing, and remained still.

>...I need more stallion friends...

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OOCO
>Chrysalis
"Celestia"
'SA'
~AJ~
~~~

>Seriously!? You brought her for this!? HER!? AGAIN!?

"She needs to get out more."

>She's a freaking wet blanket! She literally has a wet blanket with her right now!

~It's fer' the fires.~

>She's putting out my fires! I worked for those!

'Now now, I'm sure Applejack is just really excited to be spending time with us, right?'

~Ah'm just here ta' stop ya' from killin' yer'sevles.~

'...Right?'

~Gonna make sure ya' don't kill nobody else neither.~

'...right?'

~Ah'm also gonna charge ya' for what ya' do.~

'...'

>SEE!?

"Oh hush, we need someone sane."

>Then pick Twilight! I like Twilight! You like Twilight, he REALLY likes Twilight!

'That I do.'

>So why not her?

~Because ya'll scared her off.~

>HOW!?

~Ya' set fire ta' her hair.~

>ONE TIME... yesterday... ONE TIME!

~Look, just try ta' be sane here fer'a bit?~

>I DON'T COME HERE FOR SANITY!

~Then what do ya' come here for?~

>To strap rockets onto the back of this speedboat and see if it can fly on snow like it does on water!

~...What? That's stupid. You'll just wreck the bottom of it and crash, snow and water ain't the same thing.~

>LIES!

"She's right, that would end horribly."

>...

'Chrysalis? Why are you...'

>...

~...Wet blanket ain't gonna help, is it?~

>Nope.

~Figured. Tell Big Mac Ah'-~

THOOM!

~LOOOOOVEEEE HIIIIIIiiiiiiiii....~

'...'
"..."
>...S'what she gets for 'inspecting the boat' first and taking like ten minutes.
'...'
"..."
>I'm not sorry.
"'We know."'

BOOM!

'"...We know."'

>HAH!

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>Changeling
"Guard"
~~~~

>Annnnnnd COMING AT YOU LIVE, IT"S FUZZY AND THE BUZZ!

~Fuzzy and Buzz in the morning, 97.1!~
~Theeeey're heeeerreeeeee...~

"Top story toDAY, we've got a Wonderbolt show in the sky!"

>That's right Fuzzy, we get the visual spectacle of seeing the flying elite PUNCH OUT STORMCLOUDS!

"I feel soo... stallionish right now."

>Seeing as the top fliers are mares, I see what you mean, and need to tell you not to be so hard on yourself!

"OHHHHHH!"

~I have a dream!~
~To be preettyyy!~

>But this isn't just for a show everyone, it's for chairttyyyy!

"Yeah, we're working on the 'get buzz laid' funds, only two billion more bits to go before the cheapest one will say yes!"

~Gonne need bout tree fiddy...~
~BILLION dollars.~

>OHHHHHHH!

"And of course in the news, Coltsly has covered all costs of repairs for the entire city, funded by none other than Fawntaine Industries."

>After their recent dip in stocks, that's gotta hurt.

"Finally, Buzz, someone poorer than you!"

>OHHHH!

~I ate a shoe once. It wasn't that bad.~

>That's all the show we have for you today, but tune in for all the latest news and to catch THE BUZZ!

"Leaving you today is the musical styling of Micheal Colton singing his new hit single that'll leave you fuzzier than me!"

>That's fuzzy.

"Pass me some of the secret stash, I'll show you buzzy."

>OHHHHH!

"GOODNIGHT!"

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>Screwloose
“12”
~~~~~

>Come onnnnnn, and get screwed.~

“Wow, I knew you weren’t one to shy away from needs but to be this direct? Well, I mean, if you want, I guess we can make it work.”

Honestly, it was just a little lyric from a song she’d crafted since back in her asylum days, but now Screwloose smirked at the very notion as she glanced up from the paper she was scribbling on.

Nothing but notes and schematics about a myriad of topics ranging from the density of a changeling’s chitin to magic refraction to simulated love injections.

She was planning something, had been doing so for quite a while now, and although she knew the end result of this research would more than likely bring about her untimely death, it wasn’t a concern that bothered her.

Her life was superfluous. All she cared for was leaving behind a spark bright enough for everyone else to see, one impossible to snuff out.

After all, the true magic of a scientist was gauged by the mark they made on the world.

Now, though, she spun in her chair to face her assistant. He sat there on his haunches, quite still save for the eyes that slowly traveled from the tip of her tussled mane down to her hooves.

The desire was there in spades.

>Is that something you’d be interested in, perv…? Fucking?

His ear twitched. Her smirk deepened.

“It’s, uh… it’s not something I’d say no to if you offered, if that’s what you’re asking, Screwloose.”

This would undoubtedly be the toughest part of her experiment….

>So, hypothetically speaking, if I were offering, and you took me up on it, and I showed you what it’s like to taste greatness… would there be love in it?

“…Love?”


No, scratch that….

>Yes, love. The emotion that drives all races to do the craziest of things. The sensation that makes you and your kind so very interesting. I’m asking if, in mid-coitus while you’re screaming my name so loud that you deafen Faust herself, would there be love in it?

“That’s… an odd question to ask, don’t you think? It’s not like we actually love each other so I guess… no? More like a friends with benefits type thing, I’d say.”

The end result would be the hardest.

>…Then that’s a real shame.

“Huh? What is?”

Because for all her teasing and blasé behavior, she sincerely cared a great deal for the one who had essentially given her a new lease on life.

>I simply refuse to give myself to someone I love but who doesn’t love me back. Oh no, no, no, that just won’t do!

“…What? That you… whoa, wait a minute, what did you just-”

And it was for that very reason why she always swore to keep her personal life and business separate.

But…as she silenced the befuddled changeling by catching her lips against his, she figured just this once, what the hell?

The greater the risk, the greater the reward, right?

She pulled back from the embrace, slowly, purposefully, fixing him with a lip-biting grin.

>So… did you feel that?

To anybody observing them, that would have come across as a weird question, but to the changeling in question, the one who indeed did feel that warm transfer of love, he only nodded, which caused her ears to flatten themselves back against her head.

>Good.

And it really was a good thing. And a terrible thing. But for right now, while still in the embryotic stages of this study, it was very much a good thing.

She felt something brush up against the side of her neck and her ears instantly flattened themselves in a rare bout of submissiveness.

>That’s ch-cheating, pervert….

She’d almost mewled it out, subconsciously offering up more of her neck for her assistant to nuzzle.

>G-getting my weak spot… not f-fair….

“I know.”

Damn him… he really wasn’t going to make this easy, was he?

_______________________________________________________________________________________________________________

Spike sat in his lair at his work table performing fine detailed work on a small thin blade.

Inscription was a fine art lost to the ages when the minotaur clan that invented it dies out, the only remaining records of it languishing in libraries of Canterlot where any sane pony simply got a wizard to do the enchanting rather than dirty their own hooves with it.

But Spike however, was never one to waste an opportunity to expand his skillset. Besides which, you can’t customize someone else’s work as much as you can your own and he liked the personal touch.

At last he stopped and looked over his creation. Satisfied he tapped the crystal embedded in the hilt which powered the weapon and immediately the dagger exploded in red flames! Beautiful to behold…but pointless.

Looking around the space he saw a great deal which was pointless.

His Jeet Kune Doe was improving…but katas in isolation, without a sparring partner were not going to get him where he needed to go.

The weapon designs he was working on were improvements…but still only copies of what Twilight had done before her episodes. They might one day be enough, but he’d need to innovate not imitate as even her strongest had been ineffective against the titan.

Perhaps inscription would help him in that area…but for now they were simply too rudimentary to be much good. He had designs for fire, frost, lightning, hardness, sharpness, and a handful of other effects. But none of sufficient power for his needs. He’d need to design his own. That however would take time and mastery of what was already available.

Spike sighed and decided to take the rest of the evening off. He moved over to his lava tub and sank down into it enjoying the heat as it seeped into and soothed his tired muscles. Before long he was playing in the molten rock drawing strange designs of carriages, making whirlpools, a smiling fa-

A smiling face. Made of Fire.

>…There’s just so many of you now aren’t there? Not just Chrysalis, or Chitania, but now this ‘Lavan’. And for that matter Discord. …How many of you are there I wonder? How many could destroy everything I love while I’m powerless to stop you?

He got out of the tube shaking off the excess lava and began to pace

>It’s not like we see all of it coming. Blueblood was a surprise. Cordy came out of nowhere. Nobody could have predicted Fluttershy being a problem! And that’s not including sombra’s recent ‘accident’ or pommel’s run in with ‘Red’

He stopped in front of his mirror he leaned forward and rested his head against glaring into the eyes of his own reflection

>…there’s gotta be something else I can do! Gah!

He tore himself away and resumed pacing fuming to himself

And then he stopped, and looked once more into the glass

>Maybe there is…maybe I was too hasty…

He moved to the bookshelf looking for one tome in particular

>The princesses and the queens aren’t as powerful as they are because of tools and while techniques augment their power they aren’t the source of it...

Locating it he pulled it out of where it rested: On Dragons

>They’re strong because of what they are. Maybe it’s time I embraced what I am more fully

Opening the book he was quickly disappointed by the contents. He had hoped that perhaps in the greatest library in the world there was forgotten knowledge on the draconic race. This however, the only book he had found, was merely a catalogue of the colorations, sizes, and proposed subspecies observed in the dragon migrations

>…blast

Sighing he tossed the book aside. Luckily it wasn’t considered overly valuable, and now he knew why.

He ran his claws over his face

>That only leave me one option if I go that route…but if I go, I probably won’t be back for some time…I need some advice. I need someone who knows what it’s like to feel outclassed but still need to fight

>…I need to go talk to my brother.

He paused for a moment, rolling it around in his head.

>But first, let’s finish up with you girls shall we? Wound up as I am it’s not like I’ll be getting any sleep tonight.

He moved to his workbench.

He grinned.

>Come to me, me proud beauties…

_______________________________________________________________________________________________________________

>SA
"Cadence"
~~~~~

The bed that night was strangely empty. Normally, it was bursting from every seam with some sort of oversized body, but for this day alone it seemed content to house a mere two. Even their normal third partner had decided to spend the night at her desk, scribbling away while they spoke.

Some might have found it odd that husband and wife rarely slept together alone yet were about as sexually active as a daycare that was not breaking any laws, but to them, the odd thing was being here, alone, in the great big bed. Just the two of them.

But one thing that wasn't odd for them is that they were getting absolutely no sleep.

>...Really?

"I know, I was as shocked as you."

>Well... maybe shocked is the wrong word, you're... you. I could see why anyone, stallion or mare or changeling, would fall in love with you.

"Oh, stop..."

>Never, not till the day I die.

"Well, if that happens, apparently I have a backup leader of an army ready and waiting!"

>...please don't joke about that.

She couldn't help but giggle at his 'not quite serious but not quite not' tone laced in his voice.

"Oh, trust me... you're the only stallion for me."

>Well, that's good-waaaaiiiitt a minute!

The giggle was shared between them, filling the air with a lightness quite like helium as it brought more mirth to their lips.

>...Sooo, how does it feel?

"Hm?"

>You know. How's it feel to be on that end for once?

"Mmm... feels weird."

>Doesn't it?

"Especially since it's... you know, her! I honestly thought she was asexual for a long time."

>I thought she didn't know what sex was.

"And now... well, I mean, I clearly don't have anything against her feeling like that, it's just... odd?"

>Very odd. Didn't expect something like that from punchbug of all the bugs.

"At least I don't have to deal with her constantly offering me sex."

>Oh, the tragedy.

"Stop it."

>Ooof!... so, seriously, this going to be an issue for you?

"Well, no, I suppose not. She says she just wants everything to remain the same. Doesn't want me to think she's... you know, trying to get in closer to me to 'be' be with me."

>Mmmhmm... and how do you feel about, you know, knowing she really, really is into you? And not just body... but all of it.

"...I don't know. I suppose I should feel... upset that she kept this from me? Happy that she feels that way for me? Elated that someone thinks I'm worth something who isn't legally required to under pain of banishment to the couch?"

>...You wouldn't do that, right? Our couches are crystal, that really hurts.

"Oh, Shiny. No no no...I should feel something like that, but all I can feel is... this is right."

>Right?

"Oh, I suppose it's my magic doing it's work, but when she admitted it, it was like... something snapped into place. Just locked in, and worked. Like I finally found the last chapter of a book I didn't even know had been torn out, and seemed complete, but now that it's all there it just feels... right. Like I have the whole story now, and I didn't even know it had been missing."

>That does sound interesting, yes.

"Mmhmm."

>...This going to change how you see her?

"Shiny!"

>Cadence...

His voice had shifted, dropped from the room as if he wafted down from his high, a seriousness set in stone.

>It changed when I found out that Eighteen.. really, really loved me. I didn't want it to, but it did. I'm not saying it like that, I know that no matter what...

He pulled her in close, bringing her chest to his, and together they felt as their hearts beat perfectly in sync with one another.

>This is never going to change. This, if the world falls apart, is permanent. So... did it change how you see her?

She didn't answer for a time, too lost in the warmth against her, too soothed by the steadiness of the heart beyond her skin, to sunken in to such an embrace to think too clearly, no matter how hard she tried.

"Shining... I don't want it to."

>I didn't either, but it happened, and I can't say I hate that it did. It's a wonderful feeling, knowing that in this world there was more than one that really... really loved you. You, the real you, not just because you were attractive or powerful. But it is her.

"...Yes... it is her... and she is special, I will admit that."

>Think we both can.

"But you never let it change how you treated her, even though... it's just as strong for you, Shiny, every bit."

>And it doesn't have to change how you do either... but I'll admit, when I learned from you that she... she felt like that, I was a little sick that her feelings for me made her hurt herself to make them stop, or worry she would betray you. I never treated her any different... but it did change. I felt it change, even if I never let it show.

"Did it, really?"

>It did... so did it change for you... inside?

"...Maybe, maybe not. I don't suppose I'll be able to control it, if it happens. Only control how I deal with it, and I'd never hurt her deliberately. She seems happy, so we should be happy. She loves us both, it's true... but that just means we have even more reason to be thankful we let her in, doesn't it?"

>...We do.

"And of course... we'll always have this, right?"

On their own accord, their lips met, mingling, breathing in the other, and listening as those same heartbeats staying in tune even as they sped up.

>Forever.

They looked to the other, husband and wife, white stallion of duty and princess of love. They felt it, inside, calling to them, moving them like puppets, controlling them of it's own accord and the whims of their bodies, and nothing else.

"Shining..."

>Mmm...

"We're all alone tonight, nobody to bug us, or interrupt anything we... do..."

>...that they will not...

"Are you thinking... what I am thinking?"

He looked to her, his beautiful, gorgeous mare. She looked to him, her strong, handsome stallion. Looked as deeply into their eyes as they had on that wedding night so very long ago.

They looked to the other, and they knew what was to come next. Their bodies told them, and all they could do was succumb to its whims, and let it happen, and enjoy what came next.

>...
"..."

Thup.

>"ZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZzzzzzzzzzzzz..."

They didn't care how long it had been since the last time they got 'alone time'.

They finally had the bed to themselves and weren't going to be kicked or poked or jolted by loud snoring or tossed out of the bed or punched or tickled with a wing or stabbed by a horn or any other of the hundreds of thousands of things that every night brought them from peaceful dreams into an unfortunate and unholy state of awake.

By Faust, they were going to SLEEP.

_______________________________________________________________________________________________________________

 >Lavan
"Spitfire"
~~~

>...hello.

"GAH!... How the fuck did you see me!?"

>I have an eyeball now.

"Yes, but usually you need to point it at the thing you're looking at!"

>That doesn't sound very useful, I like it better my way.

"I... ugh."

>Can you show me something interesting?

"Sure..... ta daaaaa."

>A loop de loop is not interesting.

"Screw you!"

>Show me something really interesting. Your hair looks like fire, do something with that.

"How am I supposed to-"

FWOOSH!

"NOPENOPENOPENOPENOPE!"

>I wanted to-

"YOU WANTED TO SET MY HAIR ON FIRE YOU DICK!"

>Yes. That would be interesting to watch you fly with.

"THEN I'D BE BALD! IF NOT DEAD!"

>I wouldn't kill you, dead things are boring, they simply lie there. If the option to save you is there, I will do it."

"...yay? But still, bald."

>Bald is interesting, I do not see that enough.

"Oh, and what am I supposed to tell Shining Armor when I go back? "Oh, you know, my hair caught on fire by the superbeing spitting flames at me! NO BIG!"

>Is Shining Armor a male?

"Yes!"

>I can make him bald.

"He's a unicorn, asshole, you'd burn his horn!"

>How will that hurt his flying?

"HE DOESN'T"T FLY!"

>... interesting, if you fly but he does not, does that make copulation difficult? Does he have to hold on?... That sounds very interesting. May I watch?

"..."

>...Please, I believe is the word you ponies use?

"...I'm out."

FIREBOOOOM!

>That is very interesting with the ring of fire, can I see it again?...Pony?... Pony?... oh.. where did she go?... Oh well, that talk was interesting, at least.

_______________________________________________________________________________________________________________

NC
'Steam Gauge'
"Quicksilver Sash"
---

'...'

"..."

'...You should sleep with Shining Armour, dude.'

"WHAT?! Why?"

'No one knows about us. If they do then they don't like us. You gotta take one for the team, kay?'

"I uh, no thankyou."

'Never know, Shining could have a secret love for his Guard to help morale, ifyouknowwhatI'msayin'.'

"I don't think he does."

'Well you do hear rumours from the other guys.'

"...Like?"

'Well... there's one that you and I are secretly dating, uh, there's one that--'

"Ponies think we're dating? ...Why?"

'Eh, I'unno dude, 'cos we're always together? Hell, we made it so our shifts are together too, mostly.'

"...But we're best friends."

'Yeah... I think it might be the Lyra/Bon-Bon effect.'

"Pardon?"

'Nothing...'
'But seriously, go down on the Captain's dick so we get more screentime or something. Hell, I still have that maid outfit you had back during the paintball firefight!'

"W-why do you still have that..."

'I'unno, just never got rid of it. Heh, you were an amusing slave. And I bet you felt sooo pweeetty!'

"N-no... s-shut up."

'Dude it's cool, this is NC, you can say whatever you want here.'

"...W-what, I like feeling pretty, sometimes."

'.../Sometimes/? If you got yourself any prettier you'd be walking down a runwau for Photo Finish.'

"S-shut up!"

'Like, seriously; the other day I'm fairly certain one of the guys said he saw you using bath-smellies in the showers, /and/ that you were singing 'I want to know what love is'.'

"...I-it's a good song."

'And the bath-smellies?'

"...I make no excuses, those things are awesome..."

'Whatever, dude. By the way, your eyeliner is smudged.'

"W-WHA-- oh no! Oh poo, I knew I should have gone with Neighvon, it's a little more pricey but it's so dark and glittery and never smudges, I--"

'...Pffffftahaha, ohhh...'

"B-be quiet."

'Never, you pretty little mare.'

"I will end you."

'With what, your bath-smellies?'

"Fuck you."

'Knew you were into stallions!'

"Haaaate."

_______________________________________________________________________________________________________________