Advertisement
Guest User

Untitled

a guest
Nov 22nd, 2018
583
0
Never
Not a member of Pastebin yet? Sign Up, it unlocks many cool features!
text 22.26 KB | None | 0 0
  1. PLEASE READ THIS VERY CAREFULLY, AND WRITE DOWN ANY CONCEPT YOU DISAGREE WITH OR HAVE SOMETHING TO ADD TO:
  2.  
  3. I have been deprived of the perceived feeling of warmth and affection and thus, am starved
  4.  
  5. for it. I am on a journey to find someone who i can mutually exchange the act of being
  6.  
  7. coddled. I am an extremely weak and dependent person but i am extremely kind.
  8.  
  9.  
  10.  
  11.  
  12. As mentioned i have been denied true warmth, which is part of the reason i am a
  13.  
  14. misanthrope extremist. Another just as major reason is that my whole life i have been either
  15.  
  16. antagonized, or ignored for the most part by others.
  17.  
  18.  
  19.  
  20.  
  21. In preschool i was chased on the playground and was regularly in fear at school of being
  22.  
  23. punished for not understanding what to do because of my aspergers (high functioning
  24.  
  25. autism). When i was supposed to stay still in class and i needed to get up and move and was
  26.  
  27. going crazy, the teacher grabbed my belt knuckle to stop me! THIS IS EVIL AND CRUEL. THEY DESERVE PUNISHMENT. I tried to get away but couldn't. I
  28.  
  29. was grabbed on the arm by the other teachers sometimes. It wasnt very hard but i was scared. Thats evil. In Pre-K the same things happened. In
  30.  
  31. elementary school, i was all alone. The teachers were strict with me. I had lunches i didn't
  32.  
  33. want to eat and the yard duty people and older kids who were yard duty people FORCED me
  34.  
  35. to eat... I was scared. They are psychopaths. My kindergarten teacher assigned us with "buddy time" with 5th
  36.  
  37. graders. I was scared of them and they forced me to do things i didn't want to do. All of the
  38.  
  39. kids rejected me and were either rude or didn't care about me. I eventually played some
  40.  
  41. wallball with kids in 3rd and 4th grade but i didn't feel any warmth or real connections, and i
  42.  
  43. know since they are just regular people they wouldn't abide by the morals i'm going to be
  44.  
  45. discussing here. In 5th grade i was ostracized and attacked by the people i used to play with
  46.  
  47. because they found out i was in special ed. i also was desperate to fit in with older boys on my street so i would pick on other people with
  48.  
  49. them because i was scared they would turn on me otherwise. They took turns favoring someone and picking up on a little flaw in someone
  50.  
  51. else to leave them out. They would come out and yell BEST BUDDY to the favored kid and the kid thats left out would cry. The adults
  52.  
  53. did some things but didnt do enough to stop them and didnt comfort the kids when they were crying much or try to stop it then. I feel
  54.  
  55. this was VERY wrong of the adults not to do more and it makes me furious. Do you feel this way too? Those older kids were evil
  56.  
  57. psychopaths who need a large punishment and should have been stopped. Do you agree with tihs? REMEMBER TO KEEP TRACK OF WHAT YOU DONT
  58.  
  59. AGREE WITH OR IF YOU HAVE SOMETHING TO ADD. In middle school i was terribly bullied. It wasn't
  60.  
  61. for the normal reasons of being weak. It was half the school that bullied me because i acted
  62.  
  63. incredibly funny, immature, and wild, albeit NOT hostile. They said spirits were chasing me so
  64.  
  65. i ran and screamed. they said they loved me and i always fell down. i did everything they
  66.  
  67. said so they gave me certain equations, and i would say inappropriate answers they assigned
  68.  
  69. me to say to each one. Whenever someone pointed at someone, i was told to go to that
  70.  
  71. person and say, are you ok? i became so desperate for attention because i was otherwise
  72.  
  73. invisible i pretended to be racist because i needed someone to give me stimulation. All the
  74.  
  75. kids told me there was a black/jew around and i yelled at that person... I also got furious
  76.  
  77. whenever someone got a drink of water because i faked it to get attention. instead of any of
  78.  
  79. them giving me positive attention by trying to help me, they all intentionally told me they were
  80.  
  81. getting a drink of water to make me go crazy. You see, half the school bullied me and the
  82.  
  83. other half, including the teachers, deliberately ignored it everywhere because they thought i
  84.  
  85. was acting so wild, which i was, that it wasn't serious. People also called me mr.donkey and i
  86.  
  87. went crazy mad and ran around chasing people. People said hi to me (on purpose to get me
  88.  
  89. scared) and i ran around frantically. I had the need to be first in and out of the classroom at all
  90.  
  91. times and i pushed and shoved my way, and other kids saw how desperate i was to be out
  92.  
  93. first, they all ganged up on me by trying to stop me from being the first one out. My special ed
  94.  
  95. teacher lectured me on how i had to fit in better every day. She said i need to look at others
  96.  
  97. perspectives. EVERYONE IN THE WORLD IS WRONG ONLY IM RIGHT!!!!! It was all the
  98.  
  99. same in highschool too. I became homeschooled in 11th grade because i was so insane. My
  100.  
  101. parents and therapists said they wouldnt take me places to meet people so long as im
  102.  
  103. unhygeinic and dont follow social norms. This infuriates me. Every single one of those people are horrible and needed a serious
  104.  
  105. punishment WHEN it was happening. Dont you agree they are evil deranged psychos?!?! THIS IS WRONG. ANYONE
  106.  
  107. SHOULD ACCEPT ME AS LONG AS IM NOT HOSTILE. DONT YOU AGREE?!?!! REMEMBER TO KEEP TRACK OF WHAT YOU DONT
  108.  
  109. AGREE WITH OR IF YOU HAVE SOMETHING TO ADD.
  110.  
  111.  
  112.  
  113.  
  114.  
  115.  
  116. For the next 5 years, i was constantly building anger and hate. Its unimaginable how high it is
  117.  
  118. now. Its nuts. I am not at leave to tell you my true thoughts about mankind until you prove
  119.  
  120. your compassion as i have been to the police and psychiatric hospital SEVERAL times, due to
  121.  
  122. people reporting me for telling them. I constantly pm people on discord, twitch, twitter,
  123.  
  124. facebook, youtube, email, mmorpgs, and whatnot and i EVERY FUCKING GODDAMN TIME,
  125.  
  126. get either ignored, trolled, or, very rarely some disagreements, but it extremly rarely gets that
  127.  
  128. far. NO LIKE MINDED PEOPLE. Either when i got harshly rejected or attacked, i sometimes
  129.  
  130. went on an anger rampage. i spent months stalking and harrasing that person saying
  131.  
  132. incredibly fucked up and creepy things and relentlessly stuck like glue to them. This was
  133.  
  134. however, AFTER i continuasly tried to reason with them and try to explain the very story im
  135.  
  136. telling now. Literally the entire final fantasy community despises me. Theres literally not ONE
  137.  
  138. exception. They are all one sided and take thier friends perspective and not the broken
  139.  
  140. isolated soul just looking for a friend. THEY ATTACKED ME!!!! THERE THE EVIL ONES!!!!
  141.  
  142. IM INNOCENT!!!! REMEMBER TO KEEP TRACK OF WHAT YOU DONT
  143.  
  144. AGREE WITH OR IF YOU HAVE SOMETHING TO ADD.
  145.  
  146.  
  147.  
  148.  
  149.  
  150. Due to truly knowing the feeling of being the victim, and living my life as one because i
  151.  
  152. overreact and am sensative, i truly feel an incredibly DEEP connection with another victim. In
  153.  
  154. order to feel ANY connection with anyone i need them to have hearts of gold essentially. Im
  155.  
  156. not trying to be picky ill explain why in just a second. These morals include: 1.) Stick up for a
  157.  
  158. victim of bullying, no matter what the reason, and stop the bullies and give them a punishment
  159.  
  160. so they wont do it again and to show the victim you care. MAKE A NOTE IF YOU DISAGREE WITH ANYTHING 2.) Acknowledging the fact that
  161.  
  162. when little kids argue the adults should take it JUST as seriously as adults arguing even if its childish, and
  163.  
  164. instead of telling the kids to stop, they need to make sure to address and possibly punish the
  165.  
  166. kid who started the argument, as the other kid was just retaliating as a defense mechanism. MAKE A NOTE IF YOU DISAGREE WITH ANYTHING
  167.  
  168. 3). Never killing bugs including mosquitoes (you can just brush them off and move somewhere else) unless its the kind of infestation
  169.  
  170. where you have no option. MAKE A NOTE IF YOU DISAGREE WITH ANYTHING 4. Giving
  171.  
  172. murderers, rapists, bank robbers, etc. much lighter sentences than many years in prison,
  173.  
  174. because giving terrible punishments like that just ruins another life and causes more sorrow
  175.  
  176. and destruction. The criminals also often are driven by the kind of anger i have... not that ill
  177.  
  178. become one, im just proving my point. We need to seek brain therapy for these people, and
  179.  
  180. mabye give them a small time in jail to think but other more efficent and lesser punishments
  181.  
  182. are much more compassionate. Watch this video and see if you agree with my points https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=e-nYRmU_Gxo (copy
  183.  
  184. it into your browser) MAKE A NOTE IF YOU DISAGREE WITH ANYTHING 5.) treating animals KINDLY at farms and giving them a
  185.  
  186. comfortable living envirnment (I eat meat because my parents say i wouldnt be healthy othererwise), and feel upset, and angry that
  187.  
  188. killing animals is the way we get meat. that And ZERO TOLERANCE for enslaving animals such as horses or having them in zoos or
  189.  
  190. circuses. MAKE A NOTE IF YOU DISAGREE WITH ANYTHING 6.) Stick
  191.  
  192. up for anyone who someone else is being obnoxious
  193.  
  194. to even if it isnt considered bullying. MAKE A NOTE IF YOU DISAGREE WITH ANYTHING 7.) Sticking up for, and comforting the women in this
  195.  
  196. video, and stopping the man from recording and being disgusted with the youtube comments.
  197.  
  198. https://www.youtube.com/watch?time_continue=3&v=AVKDU2Hb2mg (type this link in your browser) MAKE A NOTE IF YOU DISAGREE WITH
  199.  
  200. ANYTHING 8.) Comforting the
  201.  
  202. man in the wheelchair despite his overreaction since hes clearly upset and emotional upset,
  203.  
  204. and try to stop the recorder from engaging with him further and being disgusted with the
  205.  
  206. youtube comments. https://www.youtube.com/watch?time_continue=1&v=94nv7mNzTcs
  207.  
  208. (sorry for the commentator this is the only video of it i could find, and type the link in your browser) MAKE A NOTE IF YOU DISAGREE
  209.  
  210. WITH ANYTHING 9.) NOT associating with
  211.  
  212. ANYONE who bullies, teases, who acts obnoxious often, or who kills bugs MAKE A NOTE IF YOU DISAGREE WITH ANYTHING 10. Feeling sorry
  213.  
  214. for all the bugs and animals that get killed by predators and wish the predators didnt have to kill to survive.
  215.  
  216. MAKE A NOTE IF YOU DISAGREE WITH ANYTHING
  217.  
  218. 11.) Feeling that the comments in this video are cruel, and uncalled for, and that they are horrible people and that the video
  219.  
  220. shouldnt have lots of dislikes like that. MAKE A NOTE IF YOU DISAGREE WITH ANYTHING https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=GjOS8AzsW3g
  221.  
  222. (copy it to your browser)
  223.  
  224.  
  225. REMEMBER TO KEEP TRACK OF WHAT YOU DONT AGREE WITH OR IF YOU HAVE SOMETHING TO ADD.
  226.  
  227.  
  228.  
  229.  
  230.  
  231.  
  232.  
  233.  
  234. Those are the 9 morals i NEED someone to have for me to feel the warmth and comfot i am
  235.  
  236. so starved for... the reason i need them to be this kind is because i am weak and i was a
  237.  
  238. victim my whole life. I could imagine myself being born as a bug, and then being killed by the
  239.  
  240. people who kill bugs. I obviously could imagine those who wouldnt have stuck up for me in
  241.  
  242. my times of being bullied. I could imagine someone not sticking up for me when i was acting
  243.  
  244. unreasonable at school and got teased like the women and man in the videos. I could
  245.  
  246. imagine myself being an animal in the farm and being treated horribly just for cheaper meat. I
  247.  
  248. could imagine myself being young again and being attacked by another kid and screaming
  249.  
  250. and overreacting and the adults not condemning the other kids behavior at all.... I could
  251.  
  252. imagine myself losing my self in anger and not being able to hold the anger in any longer and
  253.  
  254. doing the wrong thing and nobody having sympathy for all the hell ive been through and
  255.  
  256. putting me in years of jail.
  257.  
  258.  
  259.  
  260.  
  261.  
  262. Can you see why i couldnt possibly feel warm around someone whgo doesnt follow all the morals?!?! This is why i hate
  263.  
  264. mankind to the core. NOBODY GIVES ME WARMTH BECAUSE WHENEVER ANY OF
  265.  
  266. THESE MORALS ARE BROKEN I FEEL ATTACKED BECAUSE IM A VICTIM AND HAVE
  267.  
  268. BEEN IN SIMILAR SITUATIONS TO ALL THESE SCENARIOS AND AM BONDED TO IT.
  269.  
  270.  
  271.  
  272. REMEMBER TO KEEP TRACK OF WHAT YOU DONT AGREE WITH OR IF YOU HAVE SOMETHING TO ADD.
  273.  
  274.  
  275.  
  276. Im not saying ive always been perfect. I used to occasionally break some of those morals
  277.  
  278. when i was young when i was still part of the human race. Luckily for me, im no longer human. I am
  279.  
  280. an alien minded figure.
  281.  
  282.  
  283. Listen i dont consider myself a mean person but i need to tell you how i feel about mankind.
  284.  
  285. There sheep. Braindead drones. Clones. They all follow the herd. Theyre hyenas who
  286.  
  287. pounce and bite the weak or different. They are defected slaves to society and to thier
  288.  
  289. genetic code. They have a somewhat lack of freewill. I am enightened. I AM BEYOND
  290.  
  291. THEM. Through experience ive learned i was born alien, as the rest of the sheep, unlike me,
  292.  
  293. dont, and cannot change. They are so incredibly brutish and thick, they cannot comprehend
  294.  
  295. my level of being. THEYRE FILTH! I WANT THEM DEAD! I HATE THEM. I cant tell you yet,
  296.  
  297. as i said but soon, if you truly will show me warmth i can tell you my darkest thoughts, which
  298.  
  299. are also my truest.
  300.  
  301.  
  302.  
  303.  
  304. Please. Please help me. Im 22. My name is Tom Sanders. I havnt been to college. I have
  305.  
  306. no job. I cant drive. I live with my parents. I am dependant on them. Im not hygeinic. And i
  307.  
  308. have no motivation to do anything. Im a nobody. A defect. A loser. BUT NOT FOR THE
  309.  
  310. REASON THOSE BRAINDEAD SHEEP ARE. THEY ARE BECAUSE THEY LET THEIR
  311.  
  312. LIFE BE TAKEN AWAY. THEYLL LIE ON THEYRE DEATHBEDS KNOWING THEIR NOT
  313.  
  314. UNIQUE. THEYRE REPLACEABLE AND BRAINWASHED BY SOCIETIES CUSTOMS. I
  315.  
  316. beg you. Please have mercy on me. Im so desperate. I need warmth. You can see how
  317.  
  318. fucked up i am. Please help me please....
  319.  
  320.  
  321. REMEMBER TO KEEP TRACK OF WHAT YOU DONT AGREE WITH OR IF YOU HAVE SOMETHING TO ADD.
  322.  
  323.  
  324.  
  325.  
  326. That is part one of the article. That was the part explaining my morals,my tohughts, and my life story. THIS part explains past sins
  327.  
  328. i commited, and sins i still do commit.
  329.  
  330. PLEASE READ THIS VERY CAREFULLY AND WRITE DOWN ANY OF MY SINS THAT YOU DONT FORGIVE/ARE NOT OK WITH.
  331.  
  332. im not saying i was BORN perfect, but i recognized the evil in me when i
  333.  
  334. was young and fixed it unlike everyone else who ignores whatever moral thing i say. Hear this: i used to do bad things. I used to be a
  335.  
  336. human (im not human anymore. Not mentally.) i was always different though socially. I used to kill bugs and when i was 7 i squished
  337.  
  338. half of an ants body to see what would happen. i hate that i did things like that. i feel bad it was wrong. i changed though unlike
  339.  
  340. everyone else. i also was desperate to fit in with older boys who left me out in the past before so i would pick on other people with
  341.  
  342. them because i was scared they would turn on me otherwise. They took turns favoring someone and picking up on a little flaw in someone
  343.  
  344. else to leave them out. They would come out and yell BEST BUDDY to the favored kid and the kid thats left out would cry. The adults
  345.  
  346. did some things but didnt do enough to stop them and didnt comfort the kids when they were crying much or try to stop it then. So you see i
  347.  
  348. did bad things because i am a FORMER human. i feel bad that i
  349.  
  350. was doing bad before. i wish it didnt happen. its just i hate the fact i shared traits with brainless humans. Thanks to these bullies
  351.  
  352. ive been transformed from a autistic kid who still didnt follow all the morals to a perfect being. in my special ed class in
  353.  
  354. highschool, i was so alone and desperate for attention i was feeling trapped. i was in a cage. i was going wild. i WAS wild. i had a
  355.  
  356. nasty special ed teacher so i was literally going insane. i needed attention so badly i acted inapropriatly on purpose to get another
  357.  
  358. student mad at me on purpose. i wasnt even thinking i wasnt ddoing it with malicious intent or for the sake of poking fun at him. i
  359.  
  360. just NEEDED attention. i feel bad. especially since the person was a grouchy and unhappy person. he has an abusive grandma who even hit
  361.  
  362. him. I wasnt fully developed yet and i was just wild. i couldnt help myself. i wasnt strong enough... that incident haunts me in
  363.  
  364. particular. i just was in a cage and i went crazy. i also was once SO antsy and unsettled i was in the woods at my grandpas house when
  365.  
  366. i was 11 and i purposely rubs a poison oak leaf on my sistrs coat when people were looking. i have no idea why i did it. i was being
  367.  
  368. shunned so much it mightve been subconcious angst idk.. i didnt even try to do it out of malicious intent i just had these bizarre
  369.  
  370. compulsions to troll, and i feel bad that i did bad thing s in the past. another bad thing i did was when i was in elementary school.
  371.  
  372. i had a lot of claustrophibia. my parents had dogs and when i felt claisstrophobic and they got too close to me i lots of times shoved
  373.  
  374. them away. (not that hard thoujgh). i feel terrible i did that but at the time i didnt feel i was being very bad. i was naive enough to
  375.  
  376. think they were simple enough that they didnt really care or know what was going on. I DID care about them, i just didnt do a good job
  377.  
  378. expressing it. i dont really have more of an excuse. i just made mistakes. again i hadnt developed fully yet. i was still a being a
  379.  
  380. human. someone who doesnt follow all of these morals. As you can see, ive made ALOT of mistakes... but hopefully you can understand?
  381.  
  382. my parents have a dog now. im nice to it, but i dont usually pet it, i usually dont interact with it because im so addicted to media,
  383.  
  384. and the dog rolls in the grass and stuff so i dont really want to touch it, and i dont like it licking my hand and stuff. im just not
  385.  
  386. really an animal person... i dont interact with my parents that much either. its a human relationship of loving and coddling i crave.
  387.  
  388. mabye if i had that id be different with them? idk... i know i may be hypocritical but dont you feel my pain in my beliefs and hate of
  389.  
  390. mankind?! cant you see how its justified? i also tried to repel this person who was being annoying and crying saying he wanted to be
  391.  
  392. my friend occasionally but mostly complaining constantly. I really was frustrated at him so even when he yelled go easy in wallball i
  393.  
  394. tried to get him out so he would stop getting in my way... i was trying to fit in so i was a normal human back then... i feel bad...
  395.  
  396. Since i was human back then, i lacked in compassion because i was so self centered and didnt give in to his needs...in elementary
  397.  
  398. school because i found him annoying and i was desperatly trying to fit in elsewhere..(for the record that person ended up having
  399.  
  400. frineds in highschool and i had none, AND he rejected me for my absurd behavior... so) that was before the fucking wires in my brain
  401.  
  402. were developed. i wasnt created into who i truly was. other people dont change i do. I did bad things. I also saw a kid bullied on a
  403.  
  404. few occasions but i was too fucking timid to stick up for him. I was in 8th grade at the time. I feel terrible about these things but
  405.  
  406. ive been abused so much it just makes me hate people who dont follow these morals even though i once didnt. I NEED someone to
  407.  
  408. sympathize with me. the difference between me and other humans, is that i recognized how evil failing to follow those morals was. They
  409.  
  410. dont, and dont even consider it when i BRING IT UP. Ive done countless other bad things. but those covered all the categories
  411.  
  412. essentially. you get the idea now. its like the wires in my brain werent developed yet. i know anger is unhealthy, and ill try to stop
  413.  
  414. it. one last bad thing i did i was at recess in 3rd grade and i was alone before so i was trying to fit in. i was still a regular
  415.  
  416. person at that point and im ashamed of this but the kid that was whining alot was crying trying to win and the other kids were laughing
  417.  
  418. about it and plaaying and i didnt help him because i REALLY wanted him out of my life. i feel bad now because i hate what happened but
  419.  
  420. i was too focused on myself. do you forgive me....
  421.  
  422. do you still sympathize with my beliefs, and feel my anger towards humans is justified, and forgive me fully? i still make
  423.  
  424. mistakes. AS YOU DID BEFORE, MAKE A NOTE OF EACH ONE YOU DONT FORGIVE OR ARE NOT OK WITH: People who disagree with me and dont feel
  425.  
  426. the same way about things i just stopped talking to because socializing drains me. also, someone on twitch i started talking to but i
  427.  
  428. burned out and stopped talking to him because he was hard to talk to... i seem to still MOSTLY only think about myself and my goals.
  429.  
  430. im just so tired... i try not to kill bugs, but when a bug is on me and i try to gently brush it off, instead of getting help from my
  431.  
  432. parents i just brush it so it gets hurt (not trying to hurt it ofc) if i have to in order to get it off. im to tired and lazy to get
  433.  
  434. my parents help and thats a flaw. I also have so many flies in my house that i dont try to catch the flies and release them because
  435.  
  436. its lots of work... I also am want to get back to my media so i wait for a second for a flying bug to get out of the way of the sink
  437.  
  438. but i dont always wait long enough and i was aware i was takng that risk but i was too lazy... again im self centered. I also did alot
  439.  
  440. of other bad things in my past but i cant remember them all... I also watch a comedian who does offensive reaction videos and makes
  441.  
  442. fun of people and i laugh sometimes (NOT at the people, but at his reactions) i know it would be best if i didnt do it, but i have such
  443.  
  444. limited things that make me enjoyable... will you tolerate/forgive these?
  445.  
  446. ill work on waiting longer for the bugs flying around the sink instead of assuming theyll be gone and ill try to get my parents to get
  447.  
  448. the bug off if i cant do it very gently. I also sometimes make fun of tv characters, but i think that OK since its jjust fake. I also
  449.  
  450. however, sometimes make fun of/joke about people that gave me a hard time in the past or who gave a family member a hard time, even if
  451.  
  452. they wernt directly hostile. i feel thats not nice so i will work on that. im not free of that sin yet but i will work on it.
  453.  
  454. but the other things might continue...
  455.  
  456. so will you forgive me for my flaws/tolerate these? do you still sympathize with my beliefs, and feel my anger towards humans is
  457.  
  458. justified, and forgive me fully? Let me know.
  459.  
  460.  
  461.  
  462. MAKE SURE TO GO BACK AND CHECK IF THERE ARE ANY PAST SINS YOU DONT FORGIVE OR CURRENT SINS YOUR NOT OK WITH.
Advertisement
Add Comment
Please, Sign In to add comment
Advertisement