Spaceball the Jumpchain

Spaceballs the Intro

Take these 1000 Spaceballs the Choice Points (SCP) to help you.

Spaceballs the Origin

Roll 1d8+20 for age, keep gender, 50 CP to decide whatever you want for both.

Drop-in (0 SCP)
You drop into the world as you are now.  No memories clouding your judgement, but no friends either.

Space rogue (100 SCP)
You are a dashing rogue, but in space.  Sometimes people doubt your morals, but you usually end up doing the right

thing.  Also, you tend to have exciting adventures.

Spaceball (100 SCP)
You are a Spaceball, from planet Spaceball.  All you do is dirty deeds.

Cameraman (100 SCP)
You don't actually have a role in this adventure, your job this time around is to be the guy (or girl) who points the camera at the people who are having adventures.  Maybe you'll finally see what this stuff is like for me.

Spaceballs the Location
Roll 1d8, or pay 100 SCP to choose if you don't like what you get.

1 Planet Spaceball
Watch out for the air shortage.

2 Planet Druidia

3 Moon of Vega

4 Planet of the Apes

5 Space Diner

6 In Pizza the Hutt's limosine

7 In the middle of space
Hope you have a ship

8 Free choice
Lucky you

Spaceballs the Perks

Drop-in (100 SCP) Free Drop-in

General Dashing-ness (100 SCP) Free Rogue
People swoon over you, you can pull of crazy plans, and you're good at space-swashbuckling.

I didn't see you playing with your dolls again! (100 SCP) Free Spaceball
People are too scared of you to call you on it when you do something embaressing.

Action! (100 SCP) Free Cameraman
You actually know how to operate a camera.

Drop-in (300 SCP) Discount Drop-in

Pretty good for Rambo (300 SCP) Discount Rogue
You're really good with a gun.

Spaceballs (300 SCP) Discount Spaceball

We are looking at now (300 SCP) Discount Cameraman
By using the latest in  cinematic technology, you're able to get movies on the shelves while they're still being made, including the movie for your current world.  It's still imperfect though, so you can only watch up to 10 minutes into the future or the past.

Drop-in (600 SCP) Discount Drop-in

Schwartz-sensitive (600 SCP) Discount Rogue
You're attuned to the Schwartz, granting you the abilities of minor telekinesis and calling a laser sword from a Schwartz ring.

If you took Spacball as your origin, you are attuned to the dark side of the Schwartz and gain an additional attack that targets a foe's most sensitive bits.

President (600 SCP) Discount Spaceball
You are now president of planet Spaceball, with all the power that entails.  This also grants a large boost to your charisma and political abilities.  Unfortunately, being around so many Spaceballs may make you think you took the Surrounded by Assholes drawback.

Don't look at the camera (600 SCP) Discount Cameraman
As long as you keep to yourself and don't do or say anything, people tend not to notice you.  Good for when you want to sit in on top-secret meetings.

Spaceballs the Merchandise

10,000 Spacebucks (50 SCP)

Spaceballs the Schwartz ring (50 SCP) Free with Schwartz-sensitive
Bupkis.

Spaceballs the Dolls (50 SCP)
Nine dolls.  One is of you, and the others are of your choice of 8 companions.

Spaceballs the Lunchbox (50 SCP)

Spaceballs the Jam (100 SCP)
Lets you jam radars.  The default flavor is raspberry, but you can pick the flavor for another 50 SCP.

Spaceballs the Flamethrower (100 SCP)
Kids love it

Spaceballs the Blaster (100 SCP)
Legally I have to tell you that you're not supposed to aim this at people, and we're not liable if you do.


Spaceballs the Liquid Schwartz (200 SCP)
Boots the speed of anything that has an engine so it goes at the speed of plot.  Refills once a month.

Spaceballs the Medalion of royalty (200 SCP)
Showing this can temporarily convince people you're royalty.  However, since this is a licensed good, it's not actually real and your story will eventually fall apart.

Spaceballs the Hyperjets (300 SCP)
Any vehicle these are installed on gains the ability to travel at lightspeed.  You should probably only instal this on a spaceship, for obvious reasons.

Spaceballs the Ludicrous Speed Drive (600 SCP)
Lightspeed too slow?  Installing this on a vehicle grants it FTFTL (Faster than Faster than Light) travel.  Be careful, you'll go so fast you'll turn to plaid.

Spaceballs the spaceships
How are you going to get around space?  This is how.

Space moped (0 SCP)
A space moped.  It'll get you around, but it's pretty weak.

Space Car (100 SCP)
It's a space car.

Space RV (200 SCP)
Can be any make of RV you want, even a Winnebago.  Comes with free Hyperjets.

Space import (300 SCP)
You can take a vehicle you already have and make it space worthy.

Spaceball 2 (1200 SCP) Discount with President
You have an exact copy of Spaceball 1.  It's extremely powerful, but requires a crew the size of an army.  It also has a mall and a three-ring circus, and can transform into the mighty Mega-Maid.  Comes with a free Ludicrous Speed Drive.  Fitting it in your warehouse might be a problem though...

Oh, and the self-destruct cancel button is broken, but I'm sure that won't be a problem.

Spaceballs the Drawbacks
Can take up to 2

I've got the same combination on my luggage! (+100 SCP)
Your password for everything is 1 2 3 4 5.  EVERYTHING.

You're much too high (+100 SCP)
Your aim is terrible.

Oh no...not again (+100 SCP)
On occasion, an alien will burst out of your torso, sing, and then run away.  This won't kill you, but it's annoying and hurts like hell.

Pizza sends out for you (+200 SCP)
You're in debt to Pizza the Hutt for one million spacebucks.  Better find some cash quick.

Matching luggage (+200 SCP)
You refuse to go anywhere unless you can bring your matching luggage.  It's a large set.

Surrounded by assholes (+300 SCP)
You're surrounded by assholes.  This also affects any companions you bring into this world.

Even in the future nothing works! (+300 SCP)
Fuck!