Night at the kriegsmuseum part 8

“vhat is my problem now MG34?” says a new geist as she shifts out from a matching border checkpoint.
With the exception of an armour plate covering her chest, she looks exactly the same as MG34
“hallo, I’m Panzerlauf, I guess I’ll be your guide for zis evening. Because apparently Sis is too good for the Panzer sector!”
MG34 shrugs “you see, Panzerlauf, it works better this way. I am ze gun-gun so I’m over here, and you are ze tank-gun so you stay over there”
“I know zat you’re just scared of the big panzers” smirks Panzerlauf
“N-no! you lie! Morser 16!”
The giant Mortar geist cracks her knuckles and picks up a nearby shell.
“ja, ja I’ll let it go. alright, Americansche, we’ll get around quicker if you transform”
Hellcat transforms and you, Husaria and Kopia take up your usual positions and Panzerlauf just plants herself on the roof of the hull, on top of the radio operator’s hatch. Hellcat drives forwards into the german section. The situation here is similar to in the allied camp, the geists are just milling around, playing card games and singing songs.
A few geists see Hellcat and her American markings and brandish the nearest object as a weapon. Panzerlauf stares down a fork wielding Panzer IV.
“So, who are the Geists in charge” I ask Panzerlauf
“zere are a few, Panzer VI, P.38(t) and Panther but everyone answers to Panzer I” replies Panzerlauf
Panzerlauf gives directions to Hellcat until we come to a command tent.
“HALT” shouts Panzerlauf at Hellcat before she can run over a Kettenkrad transporting two crates marked “Yaoi” and “AP shells ;)”
I think for a second, and decide it’s better not to ask. Panzerlauf dismounts and holds open the door of the tent for me, closing it before any of the others can enter.
A group of geists gather around a table, in a similar situation to the allied command table. A small geist at the head of the table, who I assume is Panzer I
“who ze hell are you?” she shouts, drawing the rest of the geist’s attention to me.
“I’m anon, the new night guard”
“and what can ve do for you Herr Anon?”
“well, I’d like you to stop fighting the Allies”
The Germans look to panzer I, who shrugs her shoulders
“so long as the don’t try anything ”
“you see, it’s disturbing the peace and al- wait what? that was way easier than I thought”
A geist in an Afrika Corps getup with a medal reading ‘131’ displayed proudly on her chest speaks up.
“Ve don’t really care, zey are ze salty ones”
“really?” I don’t really believe that they’d give up this easily
“Ja” says 131 “do you know how many fans I have? ‘look at ze big Tiger’ zey say ‘Ze best tank of ze war’ there are even these ‘kommando’ people who send me love letters! I don’t know how or even if zey know about geists, but love letters! It’s wonderful, vhy would I want to fight in my retirement?”
There is a minute of silence
“so zhere you have it, I’ll take you back to ze allied sector” speaks up a geist to the right of panzer I.
she has buttons joining every part of her uniform together like rivets, so I guess this is Panzer 38(t).
“it’s alright, I have Hellcat waiting outside.”
“und you think zis Hellcat is faster than me? I’ll have you know that I’m the fastest tank in the Wehrmacht…”
She seems to get lost in talking about how good and fast she is and her time in the blitzkrieg. Panzer I just sighs and motions for me to go on my way. I exit the tent to find Husaria in a fistfight with Sturmtiger. Even while the german towered a good half metre over her, she still put up her fists and danced around taunting Sturmtiger.
“Husaria, let’s go!” I shout
“YOU” screams Sturmtiger as she recognises me
“it’s time to make like occupied Germany and split!” I called to Hellcat, creating much butthurt among the surrounding geists.
I practically leap over hellcat’s turret and start bashing the inside wall
“Go Go Go!”
Hellcat speeds off in the direction of the allied tank exhibit. As we speed past the Germans I spot Panzer II and wave. I don’t get time to see if she waves back because I hear the roar of a 380mm rocket. Thinking quickly, I swing the .50 cal around and fire at the rocket. It explodes in midair, thoroughly ruining a Nashorn’s night as her ammunition started spilling out of her pockets.
We burst through into the allied tank section before Sturmtiger can load another rocket. I point out the allied commanders table to hellcat.
“The Germans say no more fighting!” I shout to Churchill.
Churchill, who was just about to move a model on her war map seemingly with the others’ approval, flips the table and shouts “FINE, I was about to give up anyway!”
Hellcat continues toward my office. On the way there my phone rings, I quickly answer it.
“hello comrade” says Ivan
“oh hey, how did it go with that Siberian tiger?”
“I make new coat. All is good with the girls?”
“yeah, the axis and allies decided to stop fighting”
“make sure they don’t get of bored, fixing broken shit is your job”
hellcat hits a bump, making me drop my phone. Instinctively, I lunge for the falling device, bringing my head crashing into the 76mm’s cannon breech