BabsZeeb

Crack of Dawn Part 2

Aug 13th, 2014
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  1. >you wake up from an uneventful night of sleep
  2. >there's something beautiful about going to bed early
  3. >you catch a shower, get dressed and make your way downstairs
  4. >half expecting Crack Pone to have made it out of your apartment with half your stuff you're surprised to see her still sleeping were you laid her the evening before
  5. >well, almost
  6. >the first thing to greet you is two back legs sticking out from behind the table
  7. >taking a look you see the poor mare had wiggled herself out of all the pillows she was laying in and made herself down to the floor
  8. "Ms Pone."
  9. >you see her left leg react and gently kick at air
  10. "Ms Pone, you need to get up."
  11. >your response were several kicks at nothing in her dream-like state
  12. >fucking horses
  13. >you take the glass of water you left her last night and pour the contents into the mess of hooves and pillows currently dwelling on your floor
  14. >the water proves effective and you're rewarded with the flailing of panicky hooves flinging pillows around your apartment
  15. >"What!? What?! I'm up!"
  16. >Hellitsabouttime.mp4
  17. "Good morning Ms Pone. Did you have a good night's sleep?"
  18. >"What? Oh. Sorry about the whole sleeping on your couch thing. I'm a heavy sleeper."
  19. >she gave you a sheepish grin
  20. "It's quite alright."
  21. >Crack Pone let out a sigh of relief as she started cleaning up the mess of pillows she made
  22. "I got an important meeting at the Country Club today, can I offer the little lady some breakfast before I leave?"
  23. >"You're... You're too kind."
  24. "Nonsense, the way I see it, I still owe you for finding my wallet!"
  25. >"I bet you had some really valuable stuff in that wallet of yours, huh?"
  26. >you give her a warm smile
  27. "More than you'd ever know."
  28.  
  29. >you find yourself back in the kitchen
  30. "Pancakes?"
  31. >you could hear Crack Pone yawn from the living room
  32. >"If it's not too much of a hassle, that sounds delicious."
  33. >mixing up the batter you find yourself mentally preparing for today
  34. >you were scheduled to meet Princess Luna and the king of the griffon empire at the Country Club
  35. >surface to say leaders of the nations in Equestria were very interested in the things you could instruct their engineers to build and your people's technology
  36. >today they were to meet you over a live test of some new royal guard's armor you purposed
  37. >the main difference being that it covered both neck and legs from harm's way
  38. >and that it wasn't made out of pure. Fucking. Gold
  39.  
  40. >you finish the pancakes and bring them to the living room table
  41. >Crack Pone eyed the delicious breakfast with hungry eyes
  42. "Hold that mouth of yours in place, I still need to get something."
  43. >running back to the kitchen you open the ridge and pull out some strawberry jam and a jug of milk
  44. >Crack Pone motioned you to sit down beside her and you did
  45. >"So, going to the country club in that fancy getup?"
  46. >you look at your suit
  47. "Oh this old thing? Yeah. Going to meet up with a couple of... Investors."
  48. >"So you're a business man?"
  49. >you roll up a pancake before answering her
  50. "Yeah, you could say that. More of an idea man really."
  51. >the sweet strawberry jam hits your tongue as you rip into your pancake
  52. "How about you?"
  53. >she looked up from her feeble attempt of rolling up a pancake with her snout and blushed slightly
  54. >"Oh. I work freelancing, y'know. Actually came to Canterlot to become an actor."
  55. >she sighed
  56. >"Things is kinda on the down low right now but I'm sure I'll pick myself up soon enough, it's only a matter of time."
  57. >you give her a reassuring smile
  58. "I'm sure you can get through it, Ms Pone. Maybe I can come see you perform sometime?"
  59. >Crack Pone flashed you a genuine smile
  60. >"I'd like that."
  61. >working your way through breakfast the two of you part ways at your front door and promise to see each-other at a later occasion
  62.  
  63. >down at the country club Fancy Pants keeps encouraging your golf swings
  64. >since your 'investors' hadn't shown up yet he insisted that the two of you practice your golf from the balcony
  65. >"Just a little bit to the left. Bend you knees. No, sturdy, control your breathing!"
  66. >club hits ball and you watch as it zooms through the air into the nearby lake
  67. >well shit
  68. >"Excellent work my dear boy! I do believe that's a a personal record on your part!"
  69. >Fancy Pant's encouraging words helped you deal with the fact that you were horrible at golf
  70. >you could see why he was as renowned with ponies around town, as influential as he was it was only to be expected
  71.  
  72. >"Sir Anonymous?"
  73. >you and Fancy Pants turn in unison and look upon the Lunar Princess
  74. >Fancy Pants gives a deep bow until Luna tells him such formality was unnecessary
  75. >"We expect this... Meeting will go under the radar of the regulars of this establishment?"
  76. >"If subtlety is the princess's wish it shall be done."
  77. >Luna nodded in Fancy Pant's direction
  78. >"We knew you were a loyal subject, Sir Pants. Show us to the meeting room."
  79. >"Right this way, Princess."
  80.  
  81. >Fancy Pant guided the two of you to the lower parts of the country club through a basement hatch
  82. >"Privacy is a virtue highly respected among us Canterlot ponies. I assure you everything that happens down here, stays down here."
  83. >Luna gave Fancy Pants a smile of approval and motioned him to leave you and the Princess alone
  84. >moving further down the underground room you saw the outline of a griffon
  85. >not just any griffon
  86. >this fucker was huge, towering your average cat-bird
  87. >"Lu-Lu! Oh how long has it been? How is my little pony?"
  88. >"We must remind you that we are not 'little', we are also are millennium older than thee."
  89. >the huge griffon let out a rowdy laugh
  90. >"And you brought a friend too? Is this the mad genius from beyond the stars?"
  91. >he waved his talons in a jokingly, spooky way
  92. >"His name is Anonymous and he has agreed to share the vast knowledge from his world with the people of Equestria."
  93. >Luna looked at you
  94. >"Anonymous, this is King GrimFjær. Ruler of the Griffin kingdoms and first of his name."
  95. >"Well color my egg purple."
  96. >the big griffon reached out a talon as a sign of friendship
  97. >you respectfully shake it as you bow
  98. >"Pah! What have the ponies been doing to you, boy? There is no need to bow before uncle Gruff-Gruff!"
  99. >you look back up and meet his beak as he give you a wink
  100. >"Now!"
  101. >'Gruff-Gruff' clasped his talons together
  102. >"Let's get this show on the road. I'm sure we all have things we'd rather be doing than exchanging formalities in a glorified cave,"
  103.  
  104. >the day was spent discussing weight advantages of not using gold on royal guard's armor
  105. >'Gruff-Gruff' as the king insisted you called him even brought a crossbow for the live test of the armor
  106. >two hours and a manikin filled with crossbow bolts later, Luna and Gruff-Gruff approved of your modifications
  107. >the rest of the meeting was spent talking about how to implement planing for an experimental lifestraw
  108. >you really liked your job
  109. >not only did you get to help ponykind further their development
  110. >you were getting mad dosh in the processes
  111. >you already had more cash than you insisted was necessary
  112. >but Luna insisted back you got compensated what she, her sister and the rest of the land's leaders felt it was worth
  113.  
  114.  
  115. >the day was quickly coming to an end and you said your goodbyes to the Griffon and the Princess respectively
  116. >thinking to yourself you decide you might want to go see what Crack Pone was up to
  117. >you walked through the neighborhood you first saw her in but she was nowhere to be seen
  118. >all along your walk you felt like you were being watched
  119. >shrugging it off as paranoia you make your way back home and prepare a couple of sandwiches for a night-time snack before going to bed
  120. >the entire time the feeling of being watched never left your mind
  121.  
  122.  
  123. >you wake up tired as shit
  124. >probably your body telling you that you have no meetings of any kind for the next days
  125. >you really wanted to just bust a nut and go back to sleep
  126. >but you wouldn't get to know more ponies worth knowing around town like that
  127. >not bothering with the shower your haul your ass downstairs and make yourself a bowl of cereal
  128. >Luna-Puffs™, your one true friend and the breakfast of champions
  129. >you get dressed and think of places to spend the day
  130. >the beach would be nice
  131. >you heard that Fancy Pants was catching some rays with a couple of rich fellow rich farts
  132. >perfect way to start the day
  133. >you pack some towels and a few bottles of water
  134. >walking through your front door you remember what that heroin addict told you about not having a lock on your door
  135. >mental note to buy a lock
  136.  
  137. >making your way downtown you pick up pony sunscreen
  138. >you don't know if it works on humans
  139. >only one way to find out
  140. >Fancy Pants was the first to notice you and waved you over to were he and his friends were laying
  141. >"Anonymous! Lovely to see you. Enjoying a day out in the sun are we?"
  142. "Yep. Nothing else to do now that there's no more meetings for a while."
  143. >you toss down your towel and sit down next to the small crowd of ponies
  144. "Who are you r friends?"
  145. >"How terribly rude of me. This is Jet-set and Upper Crust."
  146. >you shake hands/hooves respectively
  147. >"And you already know of my friend Elizabeth."
  148. >you nod to her knowingly with a smile
  149. >Elisabeth and Fancy weren't a couple, Per se. But they were always together, be it the country club or when they first introduced you to Canterlot.
  150.  
  151. >hours flew by with small talk while bathing in Celestia's glorious sunshine
  152. >Fancy and Elizabeth knew better than to ask you too in-depth on what you were discussing with the royals since Luna insisted it were to be kept low-key
  153. >no matter how many times you applied the pony sunscreen you still felt like you were gonna end up sunburned
  154. >definitely gotta go look for something stronger next time
  155. >in the corner of your exposed eyes you saw another familiar muzzle
  156. >mental note to buy a pair of sunglasses that would fit your face
  157. >it was Crack Pone
  158. >she was walking around the far right of the beach with a huge trash-bag dragging behind her
  159. >you figure another one of your friends wouldn't hurt
  160. "Ms Pone!"
  161. >1/4th of the beach to your right turns around to look at you
  162. >fucking horses and their unimaginative names
  163. >she looked around confused and disorientated until she noticed you waving
  164. >switching into a light trot she moved closer to you
  165. >"You've been making new friends without telling me, Anonymous? You wouldn't mind introducing us,right?"
  166. "No problem fancy, just.. Just be nice to her, alright?"
  167. >"I wouldn't dream of anything else, anon. A friend of you is a friend of us, am I right."
  168. >Elizabeth smiled and nodded excitingly
  169. >Jet-set and Upper Crust looked sightly uneasy however
  170.  
  171. >Crack Pone eventually managed to wobble over to you
  172. >"Hair."
  173. >what the fuck
  174. >Crack Pone walked over to Elizabeth and started stroking her mane with a hoof
  175. >"You have a really pretty mane."
  176. >shit shit shit
  177. >how did you not expect this happening
  178. >god, she's high as fuck
  179. >Elizabeth passed Crack Pone a smile
  180. >"I like your mane too. Very... down to earth!"
  181. >Crack Pone seemed to enjoy the compliment and lay down on her haunches meeting your face with hers
  182. >"You have really pretty friends anon. You guys smell nice."
  183. >sawdyjebfkuhwiks
  184.  
  185. >Fancy Pants interrupted your brain melting
  186. >"He He He. Anonymous my man. why don't you introduce us to your little friend here?"
  187. "Crust, Jet, Fancy Pants, Elizabeth. This is Ms Pone."
  188. >"Call me Crack Pone. Only Anon insists on using that formal stuff."
  189. >you heard Jet-set and Upper Crust hold back a fit of laughter
  190. >you ignore them
  191. >"So what are you doing at the beach this lovely morning, Crack Pone?"
  192. >Fancy Pants seemed unfazed as fuck
  193. >truly a bro of bros
  194. >"Oh this?"
  195. >Crack Pone shook her garbage bag with a nonchalant look on her face
  196. >"I'm recycling bottles for bits."
  197. >Jet-set and Upper Crust both burst into laughter now
  198. >You and Fancy Pants gave them a lethal glare but to no avail
  199. "Always nice to see someone with the mind to clean the beach, Ms Pone."
  200. >"Hell yeah, environment Woo!"
  201. >Crack Pone raised her front hooves in a victory pose while still resting her weight upon her haunches
  202. >her triumphant cheer was a little too loud for comfort but no one spoke up
  203. >not even Crust and Jet
  204. >they were occupied with whispering to each-other non-stop
  205. >the only thing you could make out were you and Crack Pone's names
  206. >you didn't like those fuckers anyway
  207.  
  208. >Elizabeth was the first one to break up the awkward silence and Crust and Jet's whispering
  209. >"Hey! What do you all say to some cooling down? We're at the beach after all."
  210. >She got up and headed for the water
  211. >"Last one out is a rotten horse!"
  212. >the entire group eventually got up an moved for the sea
  213. >you take one last look and notice Crack Pone still sitting in the sand
  214. "Aren't you coming with us, Ms Pone?"
  215. >"I can't swim."
  216. "Oh"
  217. >well shit
  218. >by some miracle Elizabeth must have heard you because she offered to take Crack Pone on her back
  219. >those two really seemed to hit it off
  220. >you don't know if Elizabeth did this because she wanted to or because she was polite
  221. >either way you'll have to thank her for it later
  222.  
  223. >15 minutes was all you needed before noticing your forehead getting relatively sunburned as you informed the group that it was time for you to head home for a shower
  224. >Fancy Pants insisted you take Elizabeth and Crack Pone with you
  225. >he wanted a word with Crust and Jet alone
  226.  
  227. >it didn't take you long before Elizabeth no longer shared the same way home with you and Crack Pone
  228. >"Today was really... Interesting!"
  229. >Elizabeth said cheerily
  230. >"Did you have fun today, Cracky?"
  231. >"Yeah! I loooove the environment."
  232. >Crack Pone's slurred speech and the fact that her head was perfectly aligned with her body told you that that last bathing session must have tired her out
  233. >"Well, it was fun hanging out with you, Cracky. Be sure to take care of anon on your way home, yes?"
  234. >Crack Pone mustered a salute before the two of you said your goodbyes to Elizabeth
  235.  
  236. >"You have some really pretty friends, anon."
  237. "How high are you right now?"
  238. >Crack Pone suppressed a laugh with her hoof
  239. >"What are you talking about, Anon? You're way taller than me."
  240. "Forget I said anything."
  241. >your mind wanders back to the lack of a lock on your door
  242. "Say, you don't happen to know any good locksmiths around Canterlot, do you?"
  243. >"Sure do."
  244. >...
  245. "Well, are you gonna tell me about them?"
  246. >the mare held a hoof up to her mouth in deep though before finishing of with a smile
  247. >"Carry my bottles and I'll take you to him first thing in the morning."
  248. >sounds fair
  249. "You Got yourself a deal."
  250.  
  251.  
  252. >a splash of pure dread hits you
  253. >you're torn from the clutches of sleep as a pony looms over your body with an empty glass of water in her hooves
  254. >"Yeah, you totally need a lock on your door, anon."
  255. "Smoking Jesus titty cinnamon! What are you doing in my house?!"
  256. >"You agreed to it, first thing in the morning, remember?"
  257. >you look at your wrist watch
  258. >6 something
  259. >your vision is still fuzzy from waking up
  260. "I- What?"
  261. >"We're gonna visit a locksmith, remember? i know the best guy in all of canterlot!"
  262. >it looked like someone had used her eyes as an ashtray
  263. >splotches of what you assume was once makeup paint the scene for bloodshot eyes
  264. >her breath though
  265. >your morning scent was nothing to the smell she was rocking
  266. >smelled like a brothel filled with glue and wet fireworks
  267. >you roll up one of your covers and toss it at her
  268. >making an improv pony ghost costume
  269. >fuck, you really wasn't ready to start the day off like this
  270. >you saw the pony underneath the bed sheets move and twirl
  271. "Don't! Lift the cover, I'm naked. Stay put until I get some clothes on."
  272. >muffled under your covers you could hear the pony reply
  273. >"And what if I don't?"
  274. "I'll have you arrested"
  275. >you walk over to your closet and start getting dressed
  276. >"C'mon, anon. I'm naked all the time, don't be such a prude,"
  277. "My house. My rules. Stay."
  278. >sliding a boxer on you feel more comfortable
  279. >just in time as well as the pony blatantly disregarded your orders as a head peaked at you from under the covers
  280. >"...Heya!"
  281. "How are you not tired?"
  282. >"I never went to bed."
  283. >fucking horse
  284.  
  285. >you got dressed quickly and went downstairs to brew some coffee and got a Danish pastry
  286. >"Mind giving me some? I'm starving."
  287. >you did mind
  288. >this was blatant invasion of privacy
  289. >this had to be illegal somehow
  290. >but your will to tell her off failed when you realized you can clearly see some of her skeletal structure through her coat
  291. >you sigh
  292. "One sec."
  293.  
  294. >she still eats like a deranged barbarian
  295. "So were is this locksmith of yours?"
  296. >wiping off more than a few crumbs with a hoof the mare spoke up
  297. >"South of here, small store, I know the streets of Canterlot like the back of my hoof."
  298. "So."
  299. >"...So?"
  300. "So why did you waltz into my house at 6 am instead of knocking?"
  301. >"You sleep on the second floor, anon. there's no way you would have heard me."
  302. "Why didn't you wait a couple of hours?"
  303. >"You'd have me sit on your welcome mat for hours alone while your neighbors watched?"
  304. >she gave you her best puppy face
  305. "That's not- Why didn't you just wait at home or something?"
  306. >"Your home?"
  307. "YOUR HOME!"
  308. >"Oh..."
  309. >your words hit her as physical blows
  310. >don't tell me that
  311. >"I don't really have a home. The acting job didn't really skyrocket as I expected it to, and housing in Canterlot is expensive."
  312. >you couldn't help but feel bad for her
  313. >not that you've forgiven her by any stretch of the imagination
  314. >"Oh don't look at me like that, anon. Canterlot is always held at a pleasant temperature, even during the winter the snow is slightly chilly at worst."
  315. "And your drug habits doesn't have anything to do with it?"
  316. >dead quiet
  317. >you still eye her down
  318. >"Anon, about the locksmit-"
  319. "I asked you a question."
  320.  
  321. >you were mad at her
  322. >and sick of beating around the bush
  323. >"Model job didn't go as planed. They told me I was the greatest they've ever seen."
  324. >Crack Pone snorted
  325. >"Fuckin' liars. Told me I wasn't thin enough for the stage. Said I had to be as skinny as the mares in all the magazines. That very same night I met one of the stallions that was on the audition and he offered me something to help with that, said it was ten times better than eating and."
  326. >the mare retracted from the table and slumped down on your couch
  327. >"well, the rest is history."
  328. >you felt bad now
  329. "Look. If there's anything I can do to-"
  330. >"Oh no, you've already been far too kind."
  331. "I'm serious, don't be shy to ask."
  332. >Crack Pone bit her lip and looked embarrassed
  333. "C'mon, the worst you'll get is a 'No'."
  334. >"Maybe, if it's not too much to ask I could crash on your couch... Just until I get back on my hooves. I'll even pay you back wen I have the bits, promise!"
  335. >you thought it through
  336. >on one hand she's a drug addict
  337. >on the other hand she doesn't look strong enough to smother wasp with a pillow
  338. >if she wanted to steal she would have done it some time ago
  339. >she also wouldn't recommend you get a lock
  340. >fuck it
  341. >#yolo'
  342.  
  343. >the longer you took thinking the more defeated Crack Pone looked
  344. "I have a few house rules."
  345. >her face lit up with hope like the 4th of July
  346. "Don't bring anyone over that I don't know or haven't agreed to."
  347. >"Deal!"
  348. "Don't leave the apartment in shambles, clean up after yourself."
  349. >"O.k"
  350. "Absolutely no drug use within these four walls, at all. I catch you smoking or injecting anything, I'm kicking you out without question."
  351. >"Roger!"
  352. "Be presentable, shower at least every other day and brush your teeth."
  353. >"Consider it done!"
  354. "Don't wake me up unless there's something really serious going on."
  355. >"Sure!"
  356. "Last but not least: I have the last say over the remote controller."
  357. >"No problem!"
  358. >you got up and looked around in the top shelf of a cabinet
  359. >you threw a pillow down on the couch next to her
  360. "If you break something you replace it. Now go take a ten minute shower, I need an extra moment of shuteye before we meet with this locksmith of yours."
  361. >Crack Pone dive bombed you with a hug, squeezing you harder than anyone with that physique should be able to
  362. >"Oh thankyouthankyouthankyou! You won't regret this one bit!"
  363. >you accidentally take in a whiff of her mane
  364. >noteventhedeadmayknowpeacefromthisevil.txt
  365. "Make that a 20 minute shower."
  366.  
  367. >as you lay on the couch every noise in the house is multiplied ten times
  368. >you strain yourself to fall asleep to Crack Pone's irregular hoof-steps as she makes her way up to your shower
  369. >you hear the water pipes groan in gear and welcome sleep to the sound of rushing water
  370.  
  371. >20 minutes feels like 20 seconds and all too soon you hear the assembly of hooves make their way downstairs
  372. >"Hey, anon. You awake?"
  373. >yes Crack Pone, now leave
  374. "Yeah, one sec."
  375. >you rise and push all thoughts of relaxation aside
  376. >"Great! Now let's go!"
  377. >you don't respond but simply follow her outside
  378. >"It's a couple of blocks south of here. Follow me!"
  379. >you oblige
  380. >damn, a shower did her good
  381. >gone is the remnance of cheep makeup
  382. >her mane has re-gained the color ponies are known for
  383. >her coat looks cleaner
  384. >but the grime disguised a lot of scars and inconsistencies throughout her torso and hooves
  385. >fights, drugs, abuse?
  386. >probably all 3
  387. >"You're so quiet, anon. What's wrong?"
  388. "Nothing, I just don't want to be here right now."
  389. >"Awe, don't you want that new lock after all?"
  390. "I do, I just feel zapped is all."
  391. >"Well I know what would help that!"
  392. "Forget about it."
  393. >"C'mon, anon. Live a little."
  394. "No."
  395. >"You Only Live Once~!"
  396. "You made my point."
  397. >Crack Pone looked like a light-bulb in her head long turned off suddenly switched on
  398. >"It's over here."
  399. >you stand before an old timey' clock store
  400. "I thought you said you knew the best locksmith in town."
  401. >"Oh hehe. He's the best alright, his cutiemark represents his talent for tinkering with small stuff."
  402. "Aha."
  403. >you still thought cutiemarks were stupid
  404. >probably Celestia's way of filling out each and every job in her empire
  405. >urgh, you're too tired for conspiracy theories
  406.  
  407. >you realize Crack Pone has gone in without you and is now arguing with the gray unicorn stallion behind the counter
  408. >"For the last time, anypony who tries to sell me stolen goods is forever banned from entering my store!"
  409. "Did I walk in on something?"
  410. >"See! I told you I brought a friend. I'd never shop at your shitty shop anyways! Everything looks like it's at least 100 years old!"
  411. >the unicorn stallion regained his composure and formally started a conversation with you while hauling Crack Pone out of his shop with his magic
  412. >"Ahh! A paying customer!"
  413. >you heard Crack Pone's string of profanity as she was dragged out of the store behind you
  414. >"What is your business here today, sir?"
  415. "I would like a lock installed in my apartment door."
  416. >"Excellent."
  417. >he motioned you to look outside his shop window were Crack Pone was banging her hooves against the glass clearly furious
  418. >"Canterlot is no longer as safe as it used to be with all... 'those' ponies running around. Why back in my day the royal guard hauled ponies into the dungeons for disturbing the peace of our fair city."
  419. "Kids these days."
  420. >the stallion let out a chuckle
  421. >"So, what kind of lock would you like and were would you like it installed?"
  422.  
  423. >it took you less than 5 minutes to give him your apartment's location, pick out a lock and 3 extra keys
  424. >"Would the Gentlecolt like to pay upfront or at the time of the installation of the new lock?"
  425. "Right now is fine."
  426. >you hand him a fist's worth of bits in a small sactual
  427. >"Excellent! I'll get to it tomorrow, you won't even know I was there."
  428. >my kind of pone
  429. >the stallion hoofs over 3 keys and you're on your merry way
  430. "We got what we came for, Cracky. C'mon."
  431. >Crack Pone was making faces to the stallion through the glass, leaving all sorts of spit behind before getting up and following you home
  432. >"Don't call me cracky!"
  433. "Why? You use a shortened version for my name, why can't I do the same?"
  434. >"It's too cute.."
  435.  
  436. "You saying 'cute' doesn't fit you?"
  437. >she kicked you in the shin
  438. >you pretended it hurt
  439. "Ouch! What's gotten you all pissy?"
  440. >"That locksmith guy, he treated me like some sort of unwanted street trash!"
  441. >you let the irony of that statement pass her by
  442. "I think little Cracky is trowing a hissy fit because she is tired"
  443. >using your baby voice worked to a T
  444. >"I'm NOT tired! And i'm Not trowing a hissy fit!"
  445. >ponies on the streets started looking at her due to her outburst
  446. "Don't worry, I'm pretty tired today as well. When's the last time you had some rest?"
  447. >"Your couch a couple of days ago."
  448. "Don't you think it's time for some sleep?"
  449. >"But I promised my buddies that I would go out clubbing today!"
  450. "If I wasn't so tired I'd give you a crash course in finances that would tell you that is a bad idea."
  451. >"How so?"
  452. "How expensive are the drinks served up in Canterlot bars?"
  453. >"Expensive."
  454. "How much money do you make?"
  455. >"A few bits with recycling bottles right now."
  456. "How do you expect to get back on your feet while blowing all your cash on alcohol and drugs?"
  457. >"Ive- I'm gonna be a famous actor!"
  458. "How do you expect to achieve that with no money or property to your name?"
  459. >"I-- Well... Hmm."
  460. "What say you we hold off with clubbing for a while, yes?"
  461. >"Great. Now you only made me want to forget about my problems even more!"
  462. >this mother fucker
  463.  
  464. "How about I join you tomorrow or something, to keep you in the reins?"
  465. >"You're welcome to join, but you don't have a remote chance to keep up, old man."
  466. "Hey! I'm not old!"
  467. >"I think 'ol Anon is trowing a hissy fit because he is tired."
  468. >Crack Pone did an old grandmothers voice
  469. >unbelievable...
  470. >"C'mon. Let's get you home, old timer"
  471. "Fuck you."
  472. >"Fuck you."
  473. >...
  474. >both of you paused and shared a laugh
  475.  
  476. >"Alright, alright anon. I'll go to bed.. couch. Whatever but you have to promise to join me clubbing tomorrow."
  477. >you were so going to regret this
  478. "Promise."
  479. >"So what do you wanna do today?"
  480. "I wanna take it easy."
  481. >"Well~"
  482. >she sidestepped and made her way in front of you
  483. >to keep eye contact she backed up while talking
  484. >"What about we buy a bunch of candy, order pizza, watch some bad movies and lift the 'no smoking' rule' for tonight?"
  485. >fuck
  486. >this reminded you too much of what you would do back on earth
  487. >"What's the matter, anon? You're usually so direct?"
  488. >ooh she enjoyed this
  489. >"If I didn't know better I'd say you've done it before."
  490. "That was a long time ago."
  491. >"One more time for old time's sake? I'll let you pet my mane."
  492. "I never asked to pet your mane."
  493. >"...Well the offer still stands. Let's celebrate the fact that you've gotten a new lock-"
  494. "That's no reason to celebrate."
  495. >"-And the fact that I'm moving in!"
  496. >you gave her a look
  497. >"F-for the time being, until I get back on my hooves of course!"
  498. >you sigh
  499. >don't let this become a habit, alright?
  500. >Crack Pone squeed in delight
  501.  
  502. >the two of you shopped candy worth a weeks salary to the average pony
  503. >you bought 7 movies since Crack Pone couldn't decide on which one she heard from a friend was good or not
  504. >handing Crack Pone a healthy stack of bits you instructed her to get the highest quality stuff she could get her hooves on
  505. >you'd sooner smoke dick than seeds
  506. >before you knew it you were both sitting in the big couch dual-wielding a joint in one hand/hoof and a big bowl of popcorn in the other as you watched some shitty Equestrian cinema
  507. >the two of you shared laughs as the horribly bad pony actors uttered their lines in the most unconvincing ways
  508. >you burned through 3 bottles of red wine and at least a kilo of candy as well as several joints each
  509. >at the end of the fourth movie Crack Pone was looking properly done for
  510. >"I think I'll call it a night, anon."
  511. >that's your que to get to bed aswe-
  512. >"Night, 'nonymous."
  513. >you wanted to say something but you were too weeded out to bother
  514. >Crack Pone lay her head in your lap and hit the moonlight with a snap
  515. >you look at your clock
  516. >It was around 3 'o clock
  517. >you'll never figure out why Equestrian movies are so fucking long
  518. >trying to get up you notice something weighing you down
  519. >oh fuck
  520. >you forgot about Crack Pone was curled up at your side with her head in your lap
  521. >...totally not weird
  522.  
  523. >fuck it
  524. >you're too high to give a shit
  525. >you take of your suit and shirt and go to bed right then and there
  526. >closing your eyes to sleep your brain gets hit by the frantic patterns
  527. >looks like you're too restless to call it a night
  528. >looking down once more you get a brilliant idea
  529. >you move your hand towards Crack Pone and start petting her
  530. >pony fur is the softest thing ever
  531. >so fucking soft
  532. >you feel brave as you dig your fingers into her mane
  533. >total relaxation follows
  534. >this totally wasn't weird or anything
  535. >it wasn't a sign of affection
  536. >it was like petting a dog or some shit
  537. >you keep telling yourself that as your fingers lightly explore the crevices of her back
  538. >closing your eyes for the second time now
  539. >sleep comes to you easy as a breeze
  540. >...like petting a dog
  541. >...totally not weird
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