Kaz and Meru (P6)

"So, you've been busy."

"What?"

"I think you know what."

"No idea what you're talking about."

"Really? I would have thought you'd be gloating."

"I don't want to talk about it."

"I suppose this means you won the bet."

"I can't feel anything below my waist."

"A pyrrhic victory, then."

"Well, apparently she can't feel anything below her waist either."

"Tunnel Snakes." Rowan said to the wall. It opened to reveal the Slytherin Common room. Rowan headed to one of the study desks, while Kaz limped over to the couch and flopped face down into it. Across from them, Merula was sprawled across one of the single chairs, her arms thrown out across the armrests and her legs stretched out across the stone floor.

"Ughhhhhhh..." Kaz let out a long groan as his body screamed in protest at the sudden drop into the couch.

"Shut it, idiot." Merula's voice drifted over from the chair, her head still tipped back over the top.

"You shut it, you harpy." Kaz didn't even bother lifting his head from the couch.

Merula made a move as if she was about to get up, only to wince and let her body flop back down. "I could destroy you right now, Reeds."

Kaz briefly wondered if he might be signing his own death warrant, but muttered under his breath anyway. "You already did that earlier..."

"What was that?"

"As if you could destroy the love of your life." Kaz swore he could feel the glare she was sending his way, and he smiled smugly before settling into the couch further.

Merula sighed and gave up on glaring at him until he died. As much as she wanted to go back to kicking him into a fine paste, she wasn't sure she could even muster the strength to stand up. As her head fell back, she caught a glimpse of the bookworm, staring at her with a thoughtful look on his face. "What do you think you're looking at?"

He didn't respond, instead opting to look over at Kaz, who appeared to have fallen asleep face down on the couch, his legs awkwardly sticking out over the side. He slowly rotated his head back to Merula, who was looking at him with one of her classic annoyed expressions on her face. He raised his eyebrows.

Neither of them spoke.

They continued to stare at each other.

Merula's face began to redden.

A smile crept across Rowan's face.

"Did you bite him?" Rowan asked the question as if it was a completely casual conversation. Merula froze, but her eyes slid directly to him. He leaned forward, his gaze focusing on a mark he could see from her open shirt collar. "Did he bite you?"

Merula's blush shot into full force and she jumped up, wincing as she did so, before limping as fast as she could toward the girl's dormitory.

Rowan smiled to himself, before spinning round in his chair and rummaging around in his bag. He eventually extracted ten golden galleons, and lay them out across the table. Looking around, he made certain he wouldn't be disturbing anyone, before he carefully turned his chair round to face Kaz, who was still face down on the couch. Picking up a galleon, he took a moment to line up the shot before throwing it toward Kaz. The galleon sailed through the air and impacted Kaz's head with a solid THUNK.

"GAH!" Kaz's entire body jolted and he threw his arms and legs out, resulting in him rolling off the couch and slamming into the stone floor. Before he had time to orient himself, another galleon hit his arm. "Wha-?" He whipped his head around, finally catching sight of Rowan right as he let loose another galleon. This one hit his collarbone, and Kaz let out a pain filled moan as his already wounded body screamed in protest. "Damnit, Rowan! Stop!" He finally managed to scramble behind the coach where Rowan couldn't reach him. "What the hell, man?"

"It's your winnings."

"Yeah, but do you need to throw them at me? I was having a nice nap!"

"You just cost me a Hogsmeade trip, so I'll throw these wherever I please."

Kaz pulled his robe up to cover his face and front before edging back around the couch. He was pleased to see his defence was working when he felt four more galleons impact the cloak. He awkwardly edged back to the couch, blocking two more galleons on the way. He sat back down, and after a couple seconds with no more galleons, he finally risked lowering the cloak from his face.

And that's when the final galleon hit him right between the eyes.

His head snapped back, and a noise somewhere between a sigh and a groan escaped his lips.

"Care to fill me in on how you managed to have the most violent relationship in Hogwarts?" Rowan's voice was as calm as always.

"I-damnit, Rowan, this is just abuse!" Kaz rubbed his sore head. "So, uhh, I might have...made a slight lapse in judgement."

"A SLIGHT lapse?"

"You know how I asked her to slap me harder in that flying lesson?"

"Yes..."

"Well, I think she took that as a challenge."

"If she's the Greatest Witch in Hogwarts, you're definitely the dumbest."

"Look, it's not like I planned it."

"Do I need to take my galleons back then?"

"No, I think I deserve those."

"So how did you end up this beat up? As far as I'm aware, people don't normally end up looking like they've tried to fist fight a giant after sleeping with someone."

"You remember it was Merula, right?"

"Does that make such a difference?"

"Man, you have no idea. She is VIOLENT." Kaz pulled his collar back and pointed out a row of nasty looking scratches across his back. "I was convinced she was attempting to murder me at some points."

"From the looks of her, you gave as good as you got."

"Trust me, this was more self-defence than anything else. I don't want to know what she would have done if I hadn't been fighting back."

"Do you think she's into that?" Rowan leaned back in his chair with a pensive look.

"I mean...when I started choking her she didn't seem against it?"

"Seriously? You started choking her and she liked it? I can't tell if you're the luckiest person in the world or not."

Kaz absentmindedly conjured a pack of ice, which he pressed against his head. "Trust me, I don't feel particularly lucky right now."

The two sat in silence for a moment, Rowan thinking and Kaz attempting to get some feeling back into his legs.

"So what now?" Rowan asked curiously.

"What do you mean?" Kaz tried to look over to him while keeping the ice pack pressed against his head.

"Are you and Merula together now?" Rowan continued.

Kaz shifted in order to lie on his back, staring at the dungeon ceiling. "I'm not sure it's that simple. I don't think she wants to stop..."

"That doesn't sound too bad."

"She might kill me."

"Alright, so it's a little bad."

"I don't think she's planning to hold off either. you saw her face in Potions, right?"

"Hmm...yeah. She looked like she wanted to throw herself at you right then and there."

Kaz groaned, sinking even deeper into the couch. "I don't think I can survive this year..."