Greater Magic Power

Roran took a breath, as he shifted his gaze around and left the others, why? He need to focus, mainly due tot he battlefield training he needed to do, mainly his magic power given he's been neglecting that for so long. Still, he found his brow knitting together as he gathered his thoughts and his breathing became more erratic as he broke his concentration and broke off a bit. He needed to calm himself, or something, just getaway. He could feel his temptations as a wielder of [The Laughing Devil] passive rising to gain more power, but why was he like this? Was it because he was getting more energy flown through him by the various emotions? [1]

Honestly, he was scared to see what would happen, mostly scared of himself. He knew the capabilities he could possibly wrought; it all went back to two individuals, his mom and dad. Their presence still ruled over his mind as he attempted to regain his composure as he thought of the last time, he saw them. [2]

"Dammit, not again."
Roran narrowed his gaze and wiped his sweat as he stabbed his weapon into the ground before he sucked in a sharp air before exhaling, he needed to focus, and while that was easier said than done, he really had no choice in the matter given all the things he's been through thus far. [3]

Especially nowadays as Roran recalled an influx of emotions overtaking him at once at one point. He had to grip his chest a bit to slowly calm himself down as he splashed water on his face a bit as he shook his head a bit. He needed a way to overcome this if he wanted to progress through his, and it was not like he could challenge and fight his parents who abandoned him. [4]

He also knew that humans were naturally like this at some point in time. But who did he have to crush to get there? Why? His greatest fear was if he truly would end up losing himself if he did this or not. He knew he’d eventually have to take more lives to reach such a goal, but... was he truly okay with stepping on others to further his goals? Honestly, he didn't know, as he was just attempting to further his magical power using his emotions to fuel the icy grip of his flames. [5]
Roran honestly, he did not know. At some point in time, he was content with his current progress before he felt like it was simply not enough anymore. But would he lose the friends he made? Make more enemies? How would the people he knew currently view him upon taking the Path of Power that all humans would eventually take? While power wasn't all that necessary, it was a requirement, there was just various ways to obtain such power. (6)

These questions continued to plague his mind before he sighed to himself. The flame nature that was in his body warmed him a bit despite the cold as he removed his fur clothing. If he were going to walk such a path, he would just take the plunge, he did not want to lose what made him after all. When he returned, he was a bit calmer, he still did not have the answers to his question, but he did not want to idle forever until he came up with a solution, he just wanted to be like the flames and set those thoughts ablaze with the path he chose. (7)
Roran sighed, the whole point of this was doing some intense mana control under pressure and training his mana power as well, anything to gain some sort of edge in the battlefield really. Then there was the whole situtation witht he Church, it was a lot to judgle,but he had to do so for the one that basically gave him a purpose. [8]

Groaning he opened his hand as he slowly started to funnel magic through his palms, just increasing the density and feriosity of his flames.When he breathed, he became aware of the rising and falling of his abdomen as air breathe in and out. As he did this the flame lighten before deeming along the time he cycled through breathing. He stretched his hand towards the fire as he allowed it to bathe in his hand. [9]

The fire felt warm, it did not burn his body as it slowly crept up from his hand up to his arm. Was this how others felt when he finally learned to completely understand the capacity of mana? Maybe? He could not find him, after all, to really confirm this. All he knew was his own experience and how it would shape him. [10]