#epic #burn #roasted #duel #comedy #wtf

"Call me daddy."
"No."
"Come on! I called you daddy!"
"That's because I'm your father."
"but you aren't darth Vader."
"True, but I can use the force of my hand to smack you upside the back of your head."
"You're a dick."
"I've got to be, otherwise you wouldn't have been born."
"I'm guessing when I hit 88 months, you got to see some serious shit?"
"So much of it, I wish I could go back to the future!"
"But if you went back, you'd be missing the Jurassic Park themed birthday party!"
"Well, it's like this, I'm not going to be there for the birthday raptor."
"Sounds unpleasant for everyone involved."
"That's what your mother said about your birth."
"she described it like being a live action reimagening of The Thing."
"You were pretty sparkly too."
"I guess you could say I was oneo f fifty shades of Twilight?"
"I'm disowning you from life."
"Don't fear the Reaper!"
"Don't ask for whom the bell tolls."
"Are you still Unforgiven?"
"Are you Unforgiven two?"
"Well, at least I"m not a clown."
"But I'm the Burger King, and last night, your mom had it her way, complete with special sauce!"