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- An Irish daughter had not been home for over 5 years.
- Upon her return, her father cussed her. "Where have ye been all this time?
- Why did ye not write to us, not even a line? Why didn't ye call? Can ye
- not understand what ye put yer old mum thru?
- The girl, crying, replied, "Sniff, sniff....dad....I became a prostitute...."
- "Ye what!!? Out of here, ye shameless harlot! Sinner! You're a disgrace to this family."
- "OK, dad-- as ye wish. I just came back to give mum this luxurious fur coat, title deed to a ten bedroom mansion plus a $5 million savings certificate. For me little brother, this gold Rolex and for ye daddy, the sparkling new Mercedes limited edition convertible that's parked outside plus a membership to the country club....(takes a breath)... and an invitation for ye all to spend New Years Eve on board my new yacht in the Riviera and ... "
- "Now what was it ye said ye had become?" says dad.
- Girl, crying again, "Sniff, sniff....a prostitute dad! Sniff, sniff."
- "Oh! Be Jesus! Ye scared me half to death, girl! I thought ye said a Protestant'.
- Come here and give yer old man a hug!"
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