Planescape: Equestria 8

>Fluttershy is still too flustered to be of any use, so Rarity takes over hostess duties.
>After a short hunt she has found you a clean towel - big and fluffy, scented faintly with violets - and pointed you at the bathroom.
>You pass your clothes out to her and then see about getting clean.
>Indoor plumbing isn’t a completely new idea to you, but it’s definitely a luxury you’re not used to.
>Most planes lack either the technology (whether mundane or magical) or the stable economic conditions to allow for such conveniences to be widespread.
>As well as the bath, with running hot and cold water, there is some sort of glass cubicle in the corner of the bathroom, tall enough for a man to stand in and wide enough for him to lie down.
>There’s a drain in the white enamel floor of the cubicle, and some sort of contraption affixed to the tiled wall.
>There are two dials, and a tube leading to some sort of blunt instrument with little holes in it.
>This thing on the end of the tubing is currently fixed up on the wall, but looks like it could be removed and moved about.
>Since it’s in the bathroom, and has a drain, you guess that when it’s operated this thing must spray water or something like that.
>Your curiosity won’t permit you not to confirm your theory, so you hang up your towel nearby and venture into the glass cubicle.
>You turn the first dial as far as it will go, but nothing happens.
>How disappointing.
>You do the same with the second dial and immediately get drenched in a thundering torrent of icy water.
>Gasping with shock, you frantically put the dial back where it was and the freezing cascade stops, leaving you shuddering.

>A lesser man might give up now, but not you.
>You’re not going to let some infernal pony contraption get the best of you.
>You angle the water cannon away from you and try the second dial again, sending a stream of cold water jetting out at the wall.
>Progress.
>You soon find that adjusting the dial will change the pressure of the water, and then move on to experiment with the first dial and soon manage to get the water to a temperature that is nice and hot without being scalding.
>Tentatively angling the stream back at yourself, you take in the novel sensation of warm water cascading down over you like a rain storm.
>It’s actually rather nice.
>The steady stream of the water on your body is relaxing, and you soon decide that this is really a very civilized way to get clean.
>Another point to the ingenuity of these ponies.
>Fluttershy doesn’t even seem wealthy; does everyp0ny have this sort of luxury as a matter of course?
>You look around for some soap, and your eye lights on a bottle on a shelf inside the cubicle.
>It looks like the shelf was designed to hold more than just this one bottle, but maybe Fluttershy just uses some sort of all-purpose liquid soap and doesn’t have anything else around.
>The bottle seems to be made of some flexible but resilient substance that you’re unfamiliar with, and it’s printed with a picture of a sky blue pony partially covered in soap lather, smiling happily.
>You guess that seems about right.
>You drizzle some of the viscous fluid out into your palm. It smells floral and faintly spicy, nice enough, if a bit feminine.
>Rubbing your hands together soon works it into a rich lather, and you soap yourself up.
>You’re about halfway through applying the soap when you realise that something is wrong.
>Actually, a couple of things are wrong.

>The first is difficult to pin down, just a vague sensation of unease that immediately sets you on edge.
>You feel a little light-headed, and your vision is slightly hazy, whilst the sound of the water cascading over your body and down to the floor seems to have changed subtly.
>The other thing is that someone – or, presumably, somep0ny – else is in the room with you.
>At least one.
>You hear a giggle, and see a pink nose pressed up to the glass wall.
“He used it Dash, he used it! We got him! Hehehe, I wonder what’s going to happen.”
“Yeah, I wonder.”
>The door to the cubicle opens, and you can see the two ponies, one pink, one cyan, sitting on their haunches, watching you inquisitively.
>They don’t seem put off by your nudity, which you suppose is only natural since they walk around naked the whole time anyway – presumably, it was only the particular circumstances around the Fluttershy incident earlier that made your shirtlessness into a whole thing.
 >Pinkie Pie is watching you with a big grin on her face, like she’s waiting for the punchline of a joke which she’s sure is going to be funny.
>Rainbow Dash’s smile isn’t so light-hearted; there’s something dangerous in that determined look.
>You have time to notice all this, but you’re slow formulating a proper response to the situation, because in the meantime, something else is happening.
>Your vision is fading.
>It’s gradual, but even as you regard the two ponies you can see their outlines getting fuzzier and fuzzier, the world slowly becoming nothing to you but light sources and patches of colour.
>You fight down the rising panic in your chest, and try to keep your voice level.
“…what have you done?”
>Pinkie Pie’s inimitable giggle is your first answer.
“You’ll see!” she says merrily.

>There’s no malice in her voice, which somehow only adds to the horror you feel as your vision continues to deteriorate second by second until you can’t even see the outlines of the ponies six feet away.
“I’m blind,” you say, your voice flat and dead. “…I’m fucking blind.”
“Huh?” Pinkie Pie sounds nonplussed. “Nono, that can’t be right,” she says, a little uncertainly. “Poison joke just plays tricks on people. Funny tricks. Being blind isn’t funny.”
“…poison… joke?”
“Yep! You just rubbed it all over yourself, silly! We put it in your shampoo for a prank.”
>You have no words.
“Are you really blind?” comes Rainbow Dash’s voice, a hard edge to her tone.
“I’m really blind,” you reply, still fighting against the churning sensation in your gut that is impelling you to howl in fury and lunge forward to murder whichever of these fucking unbelievable ponies you can lay your hands on.
“…okay. That wasn’t supposed to happen, but whatever, it’s good enough.”
“Wait, what?” Pinkie Pie says sharply. To your surprise, she actually sounds outraged. “You said we were going to play a harmless prank on Anon, not BLIND him!”
“We were! We are! Just – gah, Pinkie, I didn’t know this was going to happen either. But this is what we’ve got to work with, so just roll with it! I need to have a private chat with Anon, so just give me five, okay Pinks?”
“But Rainbow, this is MEAN.”
“…you have an antidote, right?” you cut in, an edge of desperation to your voice.
“Yep, don’t worry!” Pinkie Pie says quickly.
>You can almost hear the glare Rainbow Dash gives her.
>You breathe a ragged sigh of relief.
“So give it to me already. This is NOT funny.”
“He’s right, Dash.”
“Nope,” Rainbow Dash says firmly.
“But-“
“No. Me and Anon are going to have a talk, and then we can think about stuff like antidotes, all right?”

“Dash…”
“Trust me.”
>Something seems to pass between the two ponies.
>Without eyes, it’s a bit hard to tell.
“Okie dokie lokie!” Pinkie says after a moment, all her previous cheerfulness returned. “I’ll just leave you two alone for a bit then, have fun!”
>Hoofsteps leave the bathroom, and you are, presumably, alone with Rainbow Dash.
>You sense the disturbance in the air as she darts into sudden movement, but disoriented as you are from your loss of vision there’s no time to react.
>The next thing you know, you’re slumped against the wall, her forehooves pinning your arms back against the tiles as the water continues to drench you both.
“Now, you’re going to tell me what happened with Fluttershy,” she says.
“I don’t exactly see that it’s any of your business.”
“I’ve made it my business, so you’d better just deal with it. What happened?”
“You saw what bloody happened. She rubbed some ointment on my chest, for my bruises from yesterday. Which you’ve probably just made worse, by the way. Aside from blinding me.”
“Yeah, yeah, no need for the sob story, stick to what happened with Fluttershy, because if you hurt her, I’m gonna do a lot worse than this.”
“I told you. You saw what happened. That was as close as we got,” you say, biting back your exasperation.
“You sure seemed to enjoy it.”
“Seven bleeding hells... Yes. Yes, I did. I reckon she was getting quite into it as well. Why do we need your permission?”
“I look out for my friends,” Dash says sharply. “And I don’t know you. I’m happy to welcome you to Equestria, same as the others, but if you start causing trouble-"
“That’s your bloody idea of trouble? Getting a massage?”

“Fluttershy doesn’t have a lot of experience with stallions, all right? Ignoring the fact that you’re not even a stallion, and I don’t even know what your deal is that you’d look at her that way…”
“I’m open-minded. Years on the planes’ll do that to a body.”
“Yeah, well, close it up again. Forget about it. Go ahead and flirt with Rarity all you like, she can take care of herself, but I don’t wanna see you putting your moves on Fluttershy again.”
“Right. Okay, I get it. Fluttershy is a bit naïve, you’re worried about her. D’you think maybe we could have discussed this without blinding me?”
“…I didn’t mean for that to happen.”
“Yeah, but you haven’t fixed it yet, either.”
“I’ll fix it as soon as I know that you’re taking me seriously about Fluttershy.”
“Nope.”
“…seriously?”
“Seriously. This is barmy. I’m about done talking to you, and if you want to have to explain to your friends why I can’t go anywhere on account of being blind, I guess that’s up to you.”
>Dash seems to deflate, the pressure of her hooves that had your arms pinned to the wall slackening off a bit.
>After a moment she backs away from you entirely and turns the shower off.
“…you’re kind of a jerk.”
“You’re the one who blinded me. Jerk.”
“All right, all right… Pinkie!” she calls out. “Let’s get the antidote in here.”
>A moment later there’s the unmistakeable sound of Pinkie bouncing in.
“Hi guys! Did you have a nice talk? Let’s get this antidote going, shall we?”
>You can hear water begin to run in the bath, and the sound of something else being poured into it.
“Anon, I’m really sorry for playing such a mean prank on you,” Pinkie says. “We had no idea it would turn out like that. Dash is sorry too, right Dash?”
“Whatever.”
>Again something seems to pass between the ponies, and Dash gives a heavy sigh.
“Sorry, Anon,” she says. It’s obvious that the words don’t come easily to her. “This got kinda outta control. But I still mean what I said. If you do anything to hurt her, things are gonna get ugly.”
>You just nod.
>Soon Pinkie leads you over to the bathtub, and you sink in to the warm water.
>Your vision starts to clear within seconds, and you’re greeted with Pinkie’s beaming face.
“All better?”
“Yup.”
“Great! So I guess we’ll just leave you alone to finish up and get dry and stuff.”
>They do just that, and you’re left with some peace and quiet to reflect on what just happened.
>Sodding barmy ponies.