#Flarp2 - Session 60

<Jaspersprite> *** Everybody continues celebrating the now anual CAUL'S C-C-C-CRAZY CONDITION DAY! Yes, it's anual. Mark your calendars, people. Even GAMZEE should be experiencing the effects of his unfortunate encounter with the potion spill, just now being excused from the hospital. He... doesn't feel all that bad, actually! Maybe a little HUNGRY, for the first time in hi
<Jaspersprite> ere, but that's to be expected! Coming right out from a STOMACH REMOVAL SURGERY and all. ... Yeah, it was that bad. EATING FRIED WITCH STEW has an unfortunate tendency to do that. On the plus side! He is given access to the ability BELLY OF THE WHALE LVL. 1, along with a HOSPITAL BILL (5000 Boondollars to be paid as soon as possible) and SURGICAL MEMO, detail
<Jaspersprite> ing the circumstances and happenings of the operation.
<chthonianGunslinger> (cHARGE THE DOG)
-*- Rabbit did they uh
-*- Rabbit give him a replacement stomach
<Rabbit> (yes)
<Rabbit> (financial problems?)
<Rabbit> (charge the dog)
<Jaspersprite> *** BELLY OF THE WHALE LVL. 1: Unfortunately, being at such a low level, this ABILITY does little but make you a living vaccuum, and costs exactly one ELF TEAR to execute.
-*- tenaciouslyCrunknasty awesome
<Jaspersprite> *** SURGICAL MEMO: A bunch of important medical details entailing Gamzee's recent STOMACH REMOVAL SURGERY. It advises the recipient not to consume any more CORPSES for the following few weeks, and if you /do/ happen to consume any other CORPSES, to contact them again at the most convenient interval.
-*- tenaciouslyCrunknasty aww
-*- tenaciouslyCrunknasty what if they're some alive motherfuckers though
-*- Rabbit and then Alpha appears and becomes bffs with Gamz
<Jaspersprite> *** Cannibalism in general is DISADVISED. It says this in fine print.
-*- tenaciouslyCrunknasty but what else am i supposed to use my vacuum face for
-*- catstersiveTournure Cheeto's
-*- tenaciouslyCrunknasty genius
<Jaspersprite> *** Gamzee's super power is to consume a whole lot of cheetos at once--
-*- tenaciouslyCrunknasty Gamzee pokes at the new seam in his gut for a little while. Maybe he could have a zipper installed, in case he feels like having a look in there, or putting stuff in there for safekeeping.
-*- tenaciouslyCrunknasty Man, what if he put food in there.
<Jaspersprite> *** He is also afflicted with QWOPESIA, the disease in which Gamzee has INCREDIBLY POOR FUNCTIONALITY OF HIS LEGS. The signs of having QWOPESIA begin to show as he is kindly escorted out of Golden Hosptial by a pair of NURSODILES, but thankfully not enough to question his early dismissa.
<Jaspersprite> *** Dismissal, even.
-*- tenaciouslyCrunknasty That blows his mind until he kicks himself randomly in the face.
<Jaspersprite> *** (-1)--
<catstersiveTournure> [Does anybody even know how Gamzee works I don't]
-*- tenaciouslyCrunknasty He thinks he knew a girl named Quopesia once.
-*- tenaciouslyCrunknasty He ponders this as he chills out on the ground for a little while.
-*- tenaciouslyCrunknasty Maybe he could get a wheelchair like his main man Tavbro. That might be cool.
<Jaspersprite> *** Gamzee chills out on the ground for a little while.
<Jaspersprite> *** PARTICIPANT
-*- tenaciouslyCrunknasty Or he could just chill out here on the ground in front of the hospital for the rest of his life.
<Jaspersprite> *** Showing real courage, you ran: 1.5 meters.
<Jaspersprite> *** Everyone is a winner.
-*- tenaciouslyCrunknasty He feels like a winner.
<chthonianGunslinger> [qwopesia]
-*- chthonianGunslinger quietly just]
-*- chthonianGunslinger lies down and dies omfg]
<tenaciouslyCrunknasty> gurl)
<tenaciouslyCrunknasty> i have been dying this entire time)
<tenaciouslyCrunknasty> jasps is the best)
<Jaspersprite> [[I have been laughing for fourty seven years]]
<tenaciouslyCrunknasty> that is longer than you have been alive jaspers)
-*- Rabbit he's really a timelord
-*- Rabbit or like captain jack
-*- tenaciouslyCrunknasty The newest contender in the special olympics sits up and has a look around.
<Jaspersprite> *** Gamzee sits in front of Golden Hospital, acting as an excellent example of what you shouldn't do/be if you don't want to end up in here. The streetlamps have long since died down, as did the nightlife, and the citizens of Ardor bustle along and crowd the sidewalks. A young salamander, from afar, stops to point at Gamzee.
<Jaspersprite> *** "Mommy look a clown! The hospital has a--" Their LEGAL GUARDIANMANDER ushers them along, hastily.
<Jaspersprite> *** "Just. Don't stare at him."
<catstersiveTournure> [Who wants to bet the hospital couldn't even scrub off the facepaint]
-*- Rabbit me
<Jaspersprite> [[They weren't even sure it was facepaint or not]]
-*- Rabbit tan lines
-*- tenaciouslyCrunknasty nah they could scrub it off, he'd just reapply it when they werent looking
-*- tenaciouslyCrunknasty even when he was unconscious
<catstersiveTournure> [That made me laugh unreasonably hard]
<Jaspersprite> [[Subconsciously facepainting]]
-*- tenaciouslyCrunknasty Gamzee waves at the tinymander. Hello, small child.
<Jaspersprite> [[The doctors didn't really know how they maNAGES]]
-*- tenaciouslyCrunknasty Have you seen any of my brothers and sisters?
<Jaspersprite> [[Managed]]
<Jaspersprite> *** The afformentioned tinymander has long since been hurried along! No POOR INFLUENCES for this small childmander. It's doubtful that they've seen the rest of Gamzee's PARTY, however. It's a big city! Lots of people to see, lots of places to go.
-*- catstersiveTournure BANG. BANG.
-*- tenaciouslyCrunknasty Well shit, then, a brother's gotta get his own look on- oh SHIT, IT'S THE FUZZ-
-*- tenaciouslyCrunknasty Having already hit the deck, he rolls behind a nearby bush.
<catstersiveTournure> [> implying Gamzee can hear that at the hospital omfg]
-*- Rabbit plot twist he's an ancient demon
<Jaspersprite> [[From the days of old]]
<Jaspersprite> [[Gamzee,,,,,,,,,,,]]
-*- catstersiveTournure Don't break the door, don't break the door, don't --
<Jaspersprite> [[(To be fair isn't he like)]]
<Jaspersprite> [[(Vaguely demon-y already from all of Nero's blood transfusions)]]
<Jaspersprite> [[(Not even blood transfusions just)]]
<Jaspersprite> [[(Sort of dripping his own blood into Gamzee's open wounds precariously)]]
-*- Rabbit makes a very noteable sound of alarm from behind the bed on the floor, having landed on his back and thus stuck on the edge of rabbit coma
<tenaciouslyCrunknasty> i think gamzee drank some too?)
-*- Rabbit Gamzee if you do not watch out you will eventually create a being of immense darkness who will destroy the world
-*- chthonianGunslinger CRACK.
-*- catstersiveTournure ("cost like. six fuckin' hundred dollars t'fix th'doorframe last time. n' they say i'm reckless. y'know who got blamed? me.")
<Jaspersprite> [[(Actual Vampire Gamzee Makara)]]
-*- chthonianGunslinger THUMP.
-*- tenaciouslyCrunknasty idk he has more weird shit in him than actual blood rn)
-*- chthonianGunslinger Congratulations, you broke the door.
-*- tenaciouslyCrunknasty they are just tearing the fuck out of the hospital aren't they
-*- Rabbit makes scratch screechy noises stAHP
-*- Rabbit though they sort of
-*- Rabbit start dieing down as clockwork slows in Rabbit's chest
-*- Rabbit I hate gravity sometimes >B(
-*- chthonianGunslinger You also terrified the ever living daylights out of your paradoxial nephew, who was already busy clawing into his hair and hyperventaliating like a lonely nerd on prom night. He was already panicking over the sudden loss of-- of ,00cONTROL and-- and now--
-*- tenaciouslyCrunknasty what floor are they on?)
<chthonianGunslinger> (they're)
<chthonianGunslinger> (actually in a hotel? hahaha)
-*- Rabbit first floor of a swanky hotel
-*- Rabbit it's actually a ways away from the hospita
-*- Rabbit l
-*- catstersiveTournure The crash of the door did not stop him from nothing short of storming into the room, smelling all ozone and sulfur and -- and slowing, pausing. There...
<tenaciouslyCrunknasty> oh)
-*- catstersiveTournure There was no immediate danger -- no scent of blood except himself, no looming threat, just a boy trembling and panicking and gripping his head like he felt insane.
-*- tenaciouslyCrunknasty Crisis averted, thinks The Gamz, as the sound he heard was probably a truck backfiring.
-*- catstersiveTournure It wasn't an unfamiliar sight.
<catstersiveTournure> [omfg Gamzee what]
<catstersiveTournure> [nevermind why would I ask]
-*- tenaciouslyCrunknasty ?
-*- chthonianGunslinger Click click click click click.
-*- tenaciouslyCrunknasty Anyway.
-*- Rabbit soft hisssss of steam
-*- tenaciouslyCrunknasty All these mysterious ass sounds were just another part of living in the city. Got used to the chilled out river and forest and ocean and shit, forgot what it was up and like in a real motherfuckin burg.
-*- tenaciouslyCrunknasty He attempts to handwalk out from behind the bushes.
-*- chthonianGunslinger It turned out to be far easier to keep up with him than Kanaya expected. Simply follow the trail of brimstone and sulfur and she might as well already be there.
-*- chthonianGunslinger Oh.
-*- chthonianGunslinger And the swath of unsettled and somewhat terrified onlookers, of course.
-*- chthonianGunslinger It took her no time at all-- perhaps even faster than he realized-- to rush up behind the boy, hovering over his shoulder with a look of sheer and utter concern on her face.
-*- chthonianGunslinger The scene before her could.
-*- chthonianGunslinger Could've been better, honestly.
-*- catstersiveTournure Grrrr.
<Jaspersprite> *** Handwalking proves to be a much easier feat! Then again, handwalking is typically not quite as easy of a feat itself. But Gamzee probably won't have /much/ more trouble-- it's doubtful that street performances are far from Gamzee's skillset at all.
-*- catstersiveTournure You might not wanna. Get too close.
<Jaspersprite> [[Also oops I might]]
<Jaspersprite> [[Pop away for a little bit--]]
-*- chthonianGunslinger "are ye so without understanding also!?"
-*- chthonianGunslinger A lot better.
<catstersiveTournure> [That's ok! uwu]
-*- chthonianGunslinger (She's handled worse than you.)
-*- chthonianGunslinger (And those people happened to be her friends.)
-*- chthonianGunslinger (...And Makara.)
<Rabbit> (das okay Jasp uvu)
-*- catstersiveTournure The exclamation was high-pitched and cracking and actually took him aback -- it was -- wasn't Dante, he knew that already, but it -- felt far, far too similar, leaving his mind muddled and confused and --
-*- catstersiveTournure "Calm down," he said, two octaves too low and in the same voice he always used when he was...when it was needed. It was as much to himself as to the kid, right now.
-*- catstersiveTournure "...Y'need to calm down." He didn't think about it before reaching out (if only because he looked so much like Dante and -- a lot of reasons, really).
-*- chthonianGunslinger Sigh. It was strange, very strange, but it didn't take an ectobiologist to see inbetween the lines. Between her unnaturally colorful pallor and Nero's unusually sophisticated (albeit very much so terrified) wording, her deduction may as well have been written in stone. She wasn't sure how, or maybe even why, but...
-*- chthonianGunslinger Something wasn't right.
-*- chthonianGunslinger And Caul was no doubt the source.
-*- chthonianGunslinger Only one thing left to do now.
-*- chthonianGunslinger Click click click. "Come Here."
-*- catstersiveTournure ...That low rumble did not sound particularly happy --
-*- Rabbit help... meeeeee....
-*- chthonianGunslinger Suddenly there was people and smoke and color and it just-- just-- everything  was just so much worse, but he...he...
-*- chthonianGunslinger ...He didn't push away. Couldn't push away. Not when there was a pair of arms wrapped around him and warmth and that same gritty but soothing voice. He--
-*- chthonianGunslinger He'd--
-*- chthonianGunslinger He'd be okay.
-*- chthonianGunslinger (The warmth was mostly imagined and the voice was just a little bit too nasally to be his, but.)
-*- chthonianGunslinger (It would have to do.)
-*- chthonianGunslinger There there.
-*- chthonianGunslinger Pat pat.
-*- tenaciouslyCrunknasty Gamzee handwalks in the direction that the most shit appears to be going down in.
-*- catstersiveTournure Vergil forcibly strangled the growl in his throat -- the boy -- the boy wasn't in danger, he was okay, he -- he didn't even refuse her. Didn't attempt to. He felt vaguely like the rug had been yanked out from under him.
-*- catstersiveTournure The raw, burning heat in his chest died down, subdued, and the electric tingle under his skin subsided to normal levels. Everything was...under control, already.
-*- catstersiveTournure He. He'd just.
-*- catstersiveTournure St-st-step back and...
-*- Rabbit could
-*- Rabbit could you roll me over veril
-*- Rabbit vergil
-*- catstersiveTournure ...the ground was interesti-- the...robot on the ground was interesting?
-*- Rabbit on the otherside of the bed yes
-*- Rabbit do I look like a murder victim
-*- Rabbit tangled up in my cord once more
-*- catstersiveTournure Somebody get the tape. We got a body.
-*- Rabbit and hands pulled up like paws again, only without the gloves
<-- chthonianGunslinger (~Rory@cpe-74-79-162-167.twcny.res.rr.com) has quit (Ping timeout: 195 seconds)
--> chthonianGunslinger (~Rory@cpe-74-79-162-167.twcny.res.rr.com) has joined #Flarp2
-*- Rabbit we meet again
-*- chthonianGunslinger sIIIIIIIGH]
-*- catstersiveTournure With a final, uncertain glance at the duo, he shifted silently away, slinking toward the mechanical hand he could see around the bed. He cast a glance over his shoulder while kneeling smoothly down over the...robot whose name he --
-*- catstersiveTournure Rabbit, right.
-*- Rabbit ye
-*- Rabbit is def squinting at the ceiling, whilst a slim stream of steam slips out from behind his uneven teeth
-*- Rabbit twitches finger
-*- catstersiveTournure "Wh-what...happened?" he inquired, slowly, softly. He reached out to carefully start untangling the cord. Could...
-*- catstersiveTournure Could he even talk in this state?
<catstersiveTournure> [You didn't miss anything, by the way, CG.]
<Rabbit> "...hhhhmmmm..." was the only response, as his systems sluggishly tried to react.
-*- catstersiveTournure ...uh.
-*- catstersiveTournure ...Maybe some of his mechanisms were being affected by his position?
-*- chthonianGunslinger It had taken a few more moments of sniffling and trembling misery, huddled up against the bundle of silks and frabic as he tried his best not to hiccup like some baby, before he'd gotten a hold of himself again. The world wasn't collapsing, everything was fine, and he...
-*- chthonianGunslinger ...And he was curled up against Kanaya like a goddamn kindergarden. Christ.
-*- chthonianGunslinger He made a point of dramatically (but gently) pushing her way, crossing his arms and scowling with the best of them. He was fine, idiots. Just.
-*- catstersiveTournure Glancing over the top of the bed briefly at the blue and green -- yep they were still there -- Vergil continued making quick work of the cord, using one arm to...more or less gently lever the automaton up into a sitting position. Or. Attempt to. It was.
-*- catstersiveTournure A little heavier than he expected.
-*- chthonianGunslinger Just had a little freak out, that was all. You would too if you found that your words were turning into freakin' Shakespeare quotes.
<Jaspersprite> *** It doesn't take much longer for somebody to check precisely what the fuck is going on, down here. The local authorities were called to 99 Hotel around when the yelling of proverbs and banging began-- and only now are making their way down the halls. They've had enough on their respective hands and hand substitutes lately, and disturbance of the peace and
<catstersiveTournure> [nOW IT'S THE COPS]
<catstersiveTournure> [PANIC AND FREAK OUT, GAMZ]
-*- tenaciouslyCrunknasty He becomes one with the nearest stop sign.
<catstersiveTournure> [His hair would match too --]
<Jaspersprite> other ridiculous calls weren't quite as high on the to-do list. Even still-- justice had to be served, and it happens to be conveniently on the menu. In /prison/. A handful of POLICE SQUAD TORTOISES, ADORABLE COSTUMES AND ALL, make their-- they'll handle you /later/, Gamzee.
<Jaspersprite> *** Like. How wanted can a person /be/.
<Jaspersprite> *** -- way down the hall, sooner approaching Nero's room than later, and--
<catstersiveTournure> [how HIIGH do you even have to BE]
<Jaspersprite> *** ...
<Jaspersprite> *** ...
-*- tenaciouslyCrunknasty so many graffitti charges
<Jaspersprite> *** "erm."
-*- Rabbit soon starts to tick and whirr closer to his regular tone, his eyes opening and closing with soft clicks as he caught up. "Oh, hi Verge." He waves a bit, "danks for helpin me up."
-*- catstersiveTournure "N-no...proble--"
<Jaspersprite> *** The awkward erm ought to say more than enough as a Ardor police squad stands in the broken down doorway.
-*- catstersiveTournure His next glance toward the door proved more fruitful than the previous two as he observed their new visitors.
-*- catstersiveTournure Oh hell.
-*- chthonianGunslinger Kanaya wasn't even offended, simply sitting herself down and offering him a questioning look. She was far too used to those kinds of antics to be offended. Morailegience tended to be like that.
-*- chthonianGunslinger But then...
-*- Rabbit loooks to the door as well, "Hey, we weres gonna look for you guys." He says to the police officers, unthinking that they'd be there to arrest someone.
-*- catstersiveTournure ("hahahahAHAHAHA. hope y'have another six hundred on y', verge. who knows! this time it might be th'kid gettin' blamed!")
<chthonianGunslinger> "...Oh Dear."
<Jaspersprite> [[On y']]
<Jaspersprite> [[Dante are you even trying]]
-*- catstersiveTournure ("like father, like son, right? n' you.")
<Jaspersprite> *** There's a proverb about this somewhere.
-*- catstersiveTournure ("...well. you never fuckin' change.")
-*- chthonianGunslinger And Nero almost opens his mouth to say it.
-*- chthonianGunslinger (Probably just another string of curse words disguised as proverbs.)
-*- chthonianGunslinger ...But suddenly decides it against, remember his...condition. His mouth hangs open for a moment, shocked, then clamps shut with a leery glare.
<Jaspersprite> *** "don't mean t'go interruptin'-- well. that's exactly what i intended t'do, 'cause s'my job t'be interrupting..."
<Jaspersprite> *** "... whatever th'hell this is supposed t'be, but--"
-*- catstersiveTournure Fucking police and their fucking accent --
-*- chthonianGunslinger 'Now who the fuck broke down that door?' is what he wanted to say, pointed glares and all, but--
-*- chthonianGunslinger It'd probably just turn into a line about skipping stones or whatever.
-*- chthonianGunslinger Glaring would have to do for now.
<Jaspersprite> *** "y'all under arrest fer legitimately everythin' under th'sun--"
-*- chthonianGunslinger You. Not uncle. He's looking at you not uncle.
-*- chthonianGunslinger Kanaya's too delicate to break down doors.
-*- catstersiveTournure The room smelled potently like sulfur and ozone. Sorry, nephew. He's a little.
-*- catstersiveTournure Occupied.
-*- chthonianGunslinger So fuck you, uncle dude.
<Rabbit> "What! We didn't do nothin!" he whispers to Vergil, "we didn't, right?"
-*- chthonianGunslinger Fuck you twice over, then.
<Jaspersprite> *** "oh! naw, lil' robot feller, yer free t'go. it ain't th'police's job t'go arrestin' singin' bots that do charity work fer hospitals."
-*- catstersiveTournure "...You didn't," Vergil ground out, still glaring darkly at the officers.
<Jaspersprite> *** "s'kinda th'first rule in th'handbook."
<Rabbit> "Oh." ... "But dese guys are my help-pers; ya can't drag 'em off tas jail!"
<tenaciouslyCrunknasty> looks like gamzee and rabbit are gonna have to busk to get all the boonies for y'alls bail)
<Rabbit> (probably)
-*- chthonianGunslinger Oh, oh this wasn't good at all. Had to do something. Had to convince that they must've had the wrong group.
-*- catstersiveTournure "...Don't w-worry, R--"
<Jaspersprite> *** "naw, we can. y'see..." The turtle fumbles in retrieving a sheet of paper from his shell, unfolding it carefully and reading it over. "they've been reported fer..."
-*- catstersiveTournure And then Vergil fell flat on his back under the vicious assault of a yowling, flying bundle of white and claws.
-*- Rabbit oh dear
-*- Rabbit so that's where the cat went
-*- chthonianGunslinger (Even though they were probably right, considering their group's tendencies.)
-*- Rabbit keep your mouth closed Verge, you don't want it ta steal your tongue!
<Jaspersprite> *** "... heys! keep it down over there, m'tryin' t'read."
-*- catstersiveTournure Halley had waited patiently for this moment, stalking his prey ever so carefully, just like he always had to when tracking with the Old Master, and now the police were here and he could help detain this DEMON --
<Jaspersprite> *** "(yeesh. what kinda hotel lets cats stay overnight anyways.)"
-*- catstersiveTournure Like a good d-dog.
<chthonianGunslinger> "Oh Officer Im Sure Theres Been A--"
-*- chthonianGunslinger wH--
-*- chthonianGunslinger Oh.
-*- chthonianGunslinger Right.
-*- chthonianGunslinger The cat.
-*- chthonianGunslinger (Halley? God, he didn't know.)
-*- catstersiveTournure Fortunately for Vergil, the...er, dog's (he could smell that much) new size made it easy to remove and subdue him, though not without numerous gouges in his face. Those. Stung.
<catstersiveTournure> [(-1) --]
<Rabbit> (snrk)
-*- chthonianGunslinger Nero reached out to grab the fluffy white ball of fury, pulling it up into his arms. "he who--"
<catstersiveTournure> [More like (-5)]
-*- chthonianGunslinger ...Ugh,
<Jaspersprite> *** /Ahem/. "disturbance of th'peace, petty larceny, harrassment, underaged drinkin', blatant use've illegal substances, parkin' illegally, defacin' buildin's and landmarks, property damage..."
-*- chthonianGunslinger Better to keep his mouth shut.
<Jaspersprite> *** "and a LOT of disregard fer overdue library books!"
<Jaspersprite> *** "so."
-*- chthonianGunslinger Come here cat, don't be stupid. Yes, he was totally a weirdo, but he wasn't a bad weirdo.
-*- chthonianGunslinger ...Hopefully not a bad weirdo.
<Jaspersprite> *** "yeah. i can."
-*- catstersiveTournure mRRRAAOW --
-*- chthonianGunslinger Scritch scritch.
-*- catstersiveTournure Hissssssssssss.
-*- catstersiveTournure He is not happy with you anymore, Boy.
<Jaspersprite> *** "... hey! what'd i say 'bout all've that--"
-*- chthonianGunslinger At least it was something to do while he pondered over their immediate doom. Jesus fuckin' christ, half of those were probably Gamzee's doing.
-*- catstersiveTournure N-not that he. Was, or anything.
-*- catstersiveTournure B-baka.
-*- Rabbit listens, and then proceeds to blink. "Well, ya still can't drag dem off to jail! Maybe dey could do some community service or somethin."
<Jaspersprite> *** "that hissin' and noisin' and mraowin' and everythin'. yer interruptin' th'/law/."
-*- Rabbit was so going to lie, but then
-*- chthonianGunslinger (The other half was probably his own doing, if he was honest.)
<chthonianGunslinger> "...Th-The Law."
<Jaspersprite> *** "... oh." He turns the paper over. "and tresspassin', drivin' without a license... ah think there's a public urination charge in here somewhere, but that might be from th'dog, so--"
-*- chthonianGunslinger Oh lord, it was the legislacerators all over again. They couldn't have been that much trouble, could they? They-- they had saved the town, after all! Multiple towns! They--
<Jaspersprite> *** "yes ma'am, th'law."
-*- chthonianGunslinger ...They weren't that bad, were they?
<catstersiveTournure> [Kanaya, reflect on your party's choices.]
-*- catstersiveTournure Vergil elected not to say anything, raising his sleeve to wipe at what blood was left of the scratches on his face. Opening his mouth had never done much good in such situations.
<Rabbit> "Now, I dink that is too much for a group a people to do without bein caught, don't ya think? Ya sure you don't have da wrong group?"
-*- catstersiveTournure That, and he really didn't want to deal with these. These.
-*- catstersiveTournure Ugh.
<chthonianGunslinger> [TASTE THE BLOOD, VERGIL]
<chthonianGunslinger> [SEE THE WAR SEE ME RULE]
<chthonianGunslinger> [THE FLINCH IN YOUR EYE CALLS YOUR BLUFF]
<chthonianGunslinger> [FEEL FREE TO DIE WHEN YOU HAD ENOUGH]
<chthonianGunslinger> [USELESS CAUSE IS BREAKING YOUR BACK]
<chthonianGunslinger> [YOUR LIFE WILL END WHEN YOU ATTAokay im done]
<Rabbit> (wanders off to da bafroom)
<Jaspersprite> *** "son. i think i am moderately positive that these are 'th'glowy vampire, red haired hobo, gray aliens, and albino kid with a weird arm' that we are lookin' fer."
<Jaspersprite> *** "s'kinda hard t'make a mistake like that--"
-*- chthonianGunslinger Albino? Albino? He is not--
-*- chthonianGunslinger "thou--"
-*- catstersiveTournure Yeah.
-*- catstersiveTournure They always do that.
-*- tenaciouslyCrunknasty Gamzee, having realized that the only police force this city had consisted of tiny adorable crocodiles, follows the scent of demon tears and angry cat noises to the scene.
-*- chthonianGunslinger Oh, right. Fuck. This was so goddamn irritating to deal with.
-*- chthonianGunslinger (And unsettling. And upsetting. Maybe even a little terrifying.)
-*- catstersiveTournure At least he couldn't curse them out like Dante always did.
-*- tenaciouslyCrunknasty "Sup, motherfuckers?" he asks the world at large, his feet waving in greeting. Qwopecia is a serious ailment.
-*- chthonianGunslinger An eye roll and a deathly leer would have to do for now.
-*- chthonianGunslinger Oh, Gamzee was--
-*- chthonianGunslinger Was.
-*- tenaciouslyCrunknasty He was.
-*- chthonianGunslinger Was on his hands.
-*- chthonianGunslinger What? What's the big surprise?
-*- chthonianGunslinger (...Wait.)
<Jaspersprite> *** Gamzee also happens to be the largest reason behind the majority of these charges.
-*- tenaciouslyCrunknasty He actually does this regularly.
<Jaspersprite> *** You can almost hear the sound made as every one of the police force squint simutaneously at the handstanding hobo.
-*- catstersiveTournure ("y'fuckin' insensitive -- y'see th'kid? he's not dealin' well with any of this. yeah, some uncle.")
-*- tenaciouslyCrunknasty Just the property damage and substance abuse, really.
-*- tenaciouslyCrunknasty HONK
-*- tenaciouslyCrunknasty If graffitti even counts as property damage. It's more like vandalism?
-*- chthonianGunslinger (Why was she strobing out like a goddamn rainbow?)
-*- Rabbit ... "Well, maybe you could have dem do community service still." He proceeds to wrap an arm around Vergil's shoulders. "We can keep an eye on dem, if ya need us to."
-*- catstersiveTournure Wh --
-*- chthonianGunslinger (...Jesus christ, what was with today?)
-*- catstersiveTournure He, uh --
-*- Rabbit we're
<tenaciouslyCrunknasty> Holy shit, Kansis, you ARE the motherfuckin' party right now.
-*- Rabbit we're making dis hapen
-*- catstersiveTournure U-um. Okay.
<tenaciouslyCrunknasty> And community service is the bee's motherfuckin' knees, robro.
-*- catstersiveTournure "...Mmhm."
-*- catstersiveTournure It's. It's something.
<tenaciouslyCrunknasty> We are adventurers for /hire/, little nakkin' brothers and sisters. We done took care of a giant squidbitch over the hell in seaside.
<tenaciouslyCrunknasty> If you got some problems, we will solve the shit out of those motherfuckers.
<Rabbit> 'So dat dey don't gotta go to jail." Nod nod.
<Jaspersprite> *** "don't tell me how to up'nd do m'job now, lil' robo feller. y'see, ah don't think y'all exactly get th'gravity of how much community service you'd have t'/do/ t'make up fer--"
<catstersiveTournure> *** Adventurers *Four Hire.
<Jaspersprite> *** A vaguely flamboyant gesture is made. "/everythin/'."
<tenaciouslyCrunknasty> Ain't we done more good shit than bad shit? For /real/.
<Rabbit> "Aw, c-come on, y'gotta have somethin big enough for dem to do."
<chthonianGunslinger> "Yes Gamzee I Am Something Of A Spetacle Right Now."
-*- chthonianGunslinger Trust her, she--
-*- chthonianGunslinger She knows.
<Jaspersprite> *** "y'probably did! but th'thing is, just 'cause you rescue a princess from a dragon, don't mean y'can beat th'tar outta her. y'know what i mean? and--"
<chthonianGunslinger> [whoops distracted]
<catstersiveTournure> [sorry 8y]
<chthonianGunslinger> [also i]
<chthonianGunslinger> [is there an easier way to do rainbows]
-*- Rabbit scripts?
<catstersiveTournure> [probably not]
<catstersiveTournure> [you could skip it if you'd]
<catstersiveTournure> [like]
<chthonianGunslinger> [nO]
<Jaspersprite> *** "there ain't exactly much y'all can up'nd do, i'm afraid. i mean. we got somebody on parole that nobody wants t'keep tabs on, but even /that/ wouldn't wrap everythin' up."
<catstersiveTournure> [or only do it on certain words]
<chthonianGunslinger> [i am nothing if not a devotee to my craft]
<chthonianGunslinger> [just]
<chthonianGunslinger> [patience]
<catstersiveTournure> [it doesn't even show up in the logs,,]
<chthonianGunslinger> [pls]
<chthonianGunslinger> "As For Our Dues..."
-*- catstersiveTournure "...So, wait."
-*- catstersiveTournure Glare.
-*- chthonianGunslinger Oh.
-*- chthonianGunslinger O-okay.
<Rabbit> "But it'll get dem sorta outa trouble, right?"
-*- catstersiveTournure "You're going to arrest a group of people who do a better job of protecting citizens than you do?"
-*- catstersiveTournure He.
-*- Rabbit you guys will thank me later for this baby sitting gig
-*- catstersiveTournure ...He couldn't.
-*- Rabbit it's actually alpha,,,
<tenaciouslyCrunknasty> All that shit was some unavoidable motherfuckin' side damages of our ass-kickin' profession, my nakkobrosis.
-*- chthonianGunslinger Excuse you, he's been glaring way harder than you. Like. This whole entire time. It's the only thing he can actually do.
-*- catstersiveTournure Hah. You don't know what glaring looks like, Kid.
<Jaspersprite> *** "ah don't think y'all realize how much danger overdue library books cause--"
-*- chthonianGunslinger Everyone's being weirder than all hell and he can't even speak let alone swear and now they're in some deep fuckin' shit and no one's taking it seriously and--
<Jaspersprite> *** "look, ah don't like it any more than you do. but it's m'/job/ t'enforce th'rules around here. somebody's got to!"
-*- Rabbit ... "Well, they can just return dem, right?"
-*- chthonianGunslinger WHAT IS EVEN GOING ON?
-*- catstersiveTournure According to almost everyone, as Dante was all too willing to snarl furiously at him one particularly hard day, he was practically born with it.
<tenaciouslyCrunknasty> maybe it's maybelline)
-*- chthonianGunslinger (Don't freak out, don't freak out, whatever you do, don't freak out--)
<Jaspersprite> *** "... oh, yeah. s'pose they can. anyway-- yeah, that'd get 'em sorta outta trouble. sorta. more or less. th'rest've th'charges we could sign off as warnin's, bein' first offenses and whatnot. but." Finger waggle. "don't think i don't got my eye on y'all."
<Jaspersprite> *** /Finger/ /waggle/.
-*- catstersiveTournure Mrrrow.
-*- catstersiveTournure Nero received a raspy-tongued lick to the nose from a wide-eyed feline.
-*- catstersiveTournure Did you.
-*- catstersiveTournure Did you really forget about him.
-*- chthonianGunslinger Scritch scritch.
-*- chthonianGunslinger N-no, but--
-*- tenaciouslyCrunknasty /Foot/ /Waggle/
-*- tenaciouslyCrunknasty /Honk/
<chthonianGunslinger> "...I Suppose We Have No Choice But To Accept Your Conditions."
-*- catstersiveTournure Hmph.
<Jaspersprite> *** Rabbit's and Gamzee's collective CHARISMA STAT (13) proves to benefit the group signifigantly! See? Maybe it /isn/'/t/ such a worthless stat AFTER all. "darn right y'don't! now, if we're all wrapped up here, i think it'd be a good idea fer y'all t'git yer things'nd leave this here hotel be. they're gonna have a lot on their hands, fixin' this here door y'
<Jaspersprite> all gone'nd broke. we'll get th'feller y'all gonna be watchin' as soon as we're up'nd able. sound fine?"
-*- chthonianGunslinger After all, they really did do quite a few things of a...dubious nature.
<Jaspersprite> [[Oops sorry I'm]]
<Jaspersprite> [[Getting distracted and also am slow]]
<catstersiveTournure> [Vergil offsets their charisma combo attack]
<catstersiveTournure> [CHR 4]
<catstersiveTournure> [(5)]
<Jaspersprite> [[Group -1]]
<Rabbit> (-1)
-*- chthonianGunslinger She just wished they didn't have to do it today, of all days, when no one was in any condition to do much of anything. It.
-*- chthonianGunslinger It also didn't paint the most wholesome picture to their newest member.
-*- chthonianGunslinger Or.
-*- chthonianGunslinger Even remotely wholesome.
-*- chthonianGunslinger (They probably looked like a gang of hoodlums.)
-*- catstersiveTournure (It wasn't like he didn't live with one.)
-*- catstersiveTournure (Couldn't say the same for Rabbit --)
<Rabbit> (I uh(
<Rabbit> (live in a mansion)
<Rabbit> (which also houses a demon chair, amongst a variety of other inhabitants)
-*- chthonianGunslinger Still, one had to keep their composure in times like these.
-*- catstersiveTournure (Yeah, that's a far cry from foster care. And.)
-*- catstersiveTournure (Imp-and-raptor-infested houses.)
-*- Rabbit (that's why he adopted you verg :y)
-*- Rabbit you and dontr)
-*- catstersiveTournure we still should finish that omfg]
-*- Rabbit *w* yes)
-*- chthonianGunslinger So she straightened her skirt, put on her best sophisticated face, and daintily lifted herself to her feet. "Very Well."
-*- chthonianGunslinger Nudge.
-*- chthonianGunslinger Wh-what?
-*- chthonianGunslinger ...O-oh. Yeah.
<tenaciouslyCrunknasty> Who's this motherfucker we're supposed to chill with?
-*- Rabbit tugs at his cord, urging it to curl up back into place, out of the way, and then stands whilst pulling Verge up with him.
-*- chthonianGunslinger Nero scrambled up beside her, cat still cradled in his arms. Probably looked like a huge tool in that robe. Ugh.
-*- catstersiveTournure Hrf --
-*- chthonianGunslinger He'd say something like 'whatever' or 'yeah fine', but...
-*- chthonianGunslinger Yeah.
-*- catstersiveTournure In a robe and covered in cat fur.
-*- Rabbit is currently dressed in shirt, pants, fifty million belts, boots and socks, plus da robe
-*- catstersiveTournure Dog fur, he meant.
-*- catstersiveTournure D-dog.
-*- chthonianGunslinger So yeah. Major tool.
-*- catstersiveTournure He was. A dog.
<Jaspersprite> *** Nero obtains COMPLIMENTARY ROBE COVERED IN TEMPORARY CAT FUR.
-*- catstersiveTournure Purrrrrrrrrrrr.
-*- catstersiveTournure ...The boy was warm okay and he was --
-*- catstersiveTournure Very sleepy --
-*- catstersiveTournure How did cats live like this --
<chthonianGunslinger> "Well Be Awaiting For Further Instructions."
-*- chthonianGunslinger Rollllll. Lay it on a little thicker, why don't you?
-*- catstersiveTournure Vergil silently tolerated the robot arm around his shoulders and. Barely managed to remain silent.
-*- catstersiveTournure If only because --
-*- chthonianGunslinger It's imperative to be cordial to law enforcement on her planet.
-*- chthonianGunslinger So sue her.
-*- chthonianGunslinger (Actually.)
-*- chthonianGunslinger (D-don't do that.)
-*- catstersiveTournure ("...y'really gonna fuckin' let him take th'fall f'th'door.")
-*- chthonianGunslinger (That could get them all killed.)
<Jaspersprite> *** "'kay!" The miniature TORTOISE OFFICER turns to face the rest of the squad, now thinking that pulling half of the police force for a single call might have been a bit of a waste. "good work, men. let's get movin'-- them missin' folk ain't gonna."
<Jaspersprite> *** "stop bein' missin' all on their own."
<Jaspersprite> *** "that's just crazy talk."
-*- Rabbit ...
-*- catstersiveTournure Missing people.
-*- catstersiveTournure "What missing people?"
-*- tenaciouslyCrunknasty They might, though.
-*- chthonianGunslinger ...What.
-*- Rabbit Dat isn't one a your charges, is it?
<Jaspersprite> *** that's just crazy talk.
-*- catstersiveTournure Ohhhhhhh, this. This was going to. Be interesting.
<tenaciouslyCrunknasty> People just do how they do, nakkobro. They gonna come back when they feel the time is right up in they pump biscuits.
-*- chthonianGunslinger Good god, these idiots were worse than Capulet's very own boys in blue.
-*- chthonianGunslinger ...Hey, the hell's wrong with him?
-*- catstersiveTournure Gamzee promptly finds himself growled at -- and glared at, so it's. Not easy to miss who's on the receiving end.
-*- chthonianGunslinger Kanaya anxiously flitted her eyes to the fuming little boy. Oh. Oh Gamzee.
-*- chthonianGunslinger Now may not be a good time for your words of wisdom.
<Jaspersprite> *** With a curt nod, they head-- oh. The /prying/ type of people, it'd seem. Hrmph. "huh? oh, s'nothin' really. just... well, no, it's not nothin' at all, 'cause it's incredibly tragic and people's lives may or may not be on th'line--"
-*- catstersiveTournure "You should take these things more seriously." His tone wasn't...quite furious. Mostly just dangerous, coldly so.
<Jaspersprite> *** "but people gone and went missin', really. haven't y'all seen th'fliers on th'bulletin boards? kinda hard t'miss, really."
-*- catstersiveTournure "Just answer the question." God, could they --
-*- catstersiveTournure "..."
-*- catstersiveTournure ,,,,,
-*- catstersiveTournure "...You don't have any idea what's going on?"
-*- chthonianGunslinger ...This was going to end disasterously, wasn't it.
<tenaciouslyCrunknasty> Shit, little brother, bein' mad about shit ain't gonna make it happen any quicker.
-*- catstersiveTournure He looked vaguely like he might beat the life out of the officer simply for being there.
-*- catstersiveTournure "No, but maybe doing something about it would."
<tenaciouslyCrunknasty> May as well take a look, though. Coulda seen those motherfuckers who up and lost themselves. We been all over the place.
-*- Rabbit was going to remove his arm, but uh...
-*- Rabbit maybe
-*- Rabbit he shouldn't
<Jaspersprite> *** "it's police business, son, but--"
<tenaciouslyCrunknasty> Yeah, that's the motherfuckin' spirit!
-*- catstersiveTournure "No, you're wrong."
<tenaciouslyCrunknasty> Get up and do a thing, though.
-*- catstersiveTournure "It's not. It's th--"
-*- catstersiveTournure Vergil cut off abruptly, tense to the point of quivering. He was going to kill that stupid clown and --
<tenaciouslyCrunknasty> Yeah. /Yeah/. Blowin' my mind over here, yo.
-*- Rabbit gently
<tenaciouslyCrunknasty> I'ma go look right now, even.
-*- catstersiveTournure "Just give me the damn details and I'll find them myself."
-*- Rabbit squeezes verge. thank god for periferals
-*- tenaciouslyCrunknasty The pats of his hands fade down the hall as he goes in search of a bulletin board.
-*- catstersiveTournure Yeah. Get the hell out.
-*- chthonianGunslinger She would've stepped in and done something herself, but...
-*- chthonianGunslinger ...She suspected that would only get her decapitated at best.
<Jaspersprite> *** "/yeesh/, would y'all calm down? this ain't no place to be causin' no scene. i ain't in no possition t'be givin' out details 'bout a /police/ /investigation/."
-*- chthonianGunslinger However, it did give her an idea...
<Jaspersprite> *** "ESPECIALLY to th'people i was just 'bout to go arrestin'!"
-*- chthonianGunslinger ...An idea that would hopefully settle everything down to something. Something slightly more normal.
<chthonianGunslinger> [uh guys]
<chthonianGunslinger> [kankan's gonna say something but it's gonna take]
<chthonianGunslinger> [like]
<chthonianGunslinger> [5ever]
<chthonianGunslinger> [so uh]
<chthonianGunslinger> [uh,,,]
-*- catstersiveTournure The squeeze, however, seemed to bring him back to earth, if also irritate the hell out of him -- he crossed his arms roughly, though didn't push away the arm. That would be. Rude.
<Jaspersprite> [[Terribly Longwinded Kanaya Maryam]]
<chthonianGunslinger> [more like]
<catstersiveTournure> [I am going to go get a drink then]
<chthonianGunslinger> [terribly difficult text]
<Jaspersprite> [[I also shall]]
<Jaspersprite> [[Get a drink :9]]
<Jaspersprite> [[(And I will also handle Gamzee's thing in a moment I am sorry for the delay uou;)]]
<chthonianGunslinger> "Perhaps We Could Solve Those Particular Cases As Payment For Our Charges."
<chthonianGunslinger> "It Would Be."
<chthonianGunslinger> "Beneficial."
<chthonianGunslinger> "To Everyone Involved."
-*- catstersiveTournure He liked this girl.
-*- catstersiveTournure This girl was reasonably tolerable.
-*- chthonianGunslinger Please, please consider it, she silently begged to no one in particular. No more fights. That's all she wanted. No more fights. If they could all only simply come to an agreement...
-*- catstersiveTournure From the way Mr. Grumpy Gills over there was looking, you may indeed have a fight on your hands if this went in a direction he considered south. Or east or west. Any direction but the way he wanted to go.
-*- catstersiveTournure North, to the badgers and the moose.
-*- chthonianGunslinger That's what she was afraid of.
<Jaspersprite> *** Vergil's METAPHOR STAT is a fickle thing.
-*- chthonianGunslinger Ancestor's bless, she could only pray that this went nowhere but north.
-*- chthonianGunslinger To the shaggy hornbeasts and callousbeasts
-*- catstersiveTournure Halley had, meanwhile, somehow managed to figure out how to produce a growling sound with feline vocal chords, with the occasional intermittent hiss and purely accidental flex of the claws into Nero's hands/arms/torso.
-*- chthonianGunslinger oW--
-*- chthonianGunslinger "god bless!"
<catstersiveTournure> [omfg]
-*- catstersiveTournure Heheheh. Accidental, indeed.
-*- chthonianGunslinger ...Uh. Uh. He. He didn't mean to say that. Really.
- {Day changed to Tue Jan 22 00:00:00 2013}
-*- chthonianGunslinger He's just gonna.
-*- chthonianGunslinger Shut up now.
-*- chthonianGunslinger (Maybe shut up forever.)
-*- catstersiveTournure Even Nero, apparently, was not exempt from that scalding glare.
-*- catstersiveTournure Albeit, it was. Slightly less scalding. Though it was, of course, going to be less scalding at anyone who wasn't that damn tortoise.
-*- Rabbit has been meaning to ask what's with the loss of stutters, nero
<Jaspersprite> *** "... yer serious, ain't ya? i mean... i can't exactly go about recruitin' every dick'nd harry fer matters like this, y'know." The TORTOFFICER scratches the back of his head for a moment. "tell ya what. i'll give y'all the basic details, and if ya happen t'somehow find these missin' fellas-- dead or alive-- we'll clear yer charges. sound--"
<Jaspersprite> *** ...
<Jaspersprite> *** "-- good? uh."
-*- catstersiveTournure "Fine. Now come on." Who knew what -- who --
<Rabbit> "Yessir." Nod nod. Before Vergil and the cat exploded.
<Jaspersprite> *** Huh.
<catstersiveTournure> [oh we can switch those]
<catstersiveTournure> [wait I misread -- ok nevermind ignore me I'm]
<Jaspersprite> *** Tourettes, he assumes, before his attention is directed to the CHARITABLE and ADORABLE ROBOT.
<catstersiveTournure> [drunk apparently]
-*- Rabbit uvu*
-*- catstersiveTournure ...Time was ticking by, and always of the essence, as he'd learned.
-*- Rabbit jeopordy final question tune plays muffled in the distance
<catstersiveTournure> [omfg --]
-*- chthonianGunslinger "That Is Acceptable" She said, giving a tired smile. She wasn't going to think about the implications of what 'dead or alive' truly meant, instead hoping that they'd simply find them alive, and tried her best to focus on the fact that the crisis had been averted. For now. For how long, she could only guess. But for now, they would be fine.
-*- chthonianGunslinger Like that's gonna last--
-*- Jaspersprite I am hurrying omf]]
-*- chthonianGunslinger "Now If You Excuse Me..."
<chthonianGunslinger> [*uS]
-*- Jaspersprite *** Meanwhile! Gamzee's search for a BULLETIN BOARD has long since been fruitful. There's one just outside the MOTORIZED INN! Littered with numerous SIDEQUESTS, advertisements, and the afformentioned missing person fliers. ... An alarming amount of missing person fliers, actually. Actual missing /people/, not just nakkodiles and salamanders. No faces that
<Jaspersprite> would strike any particular bells, either.
-*- Rabbit wow why did I never see those
-*- Rabbit what
-*- Rabbit what if my broddahs are on dat board
-*- tenaciouslyCrunknasty nakkodiles- not actually people
-*- tenaciouslyCrunknasty /take/ /that/ /pigs/
<Jaspersprite> *** Econ Racism.txt
-*- tenaciouslyCrunknasty Anyway. Gamzee views the fine print to the best of his upside-down abilities.
-*- Rabbit quietly takes this opportunity to dash to the bathroom with his copper colored water bottle to fill it up from the sink doot doot