Taako Magic 3

Griffin:  Merle is upside-down -- He jumped way too early and not very far and he -- he has basically jumped and is now floating in the air, uh, and it looks like he is going to land in-front of Hurley’s battle wagon.

Justin: I focus all my energy and wait for the fucking spell that I’ve been wanting to cast and have not had the opportunity to until just this moment -- A bolt of light erupts from the Umbra staff and underneath… of… Merle…  [Clint wheezes] appears… [serious tone] a phantom steed.

Clint: [neighs like a horse]

Griffin: Wh-wh-what the fuck?!

Travis: Woah!

Griffin: WHAT?!

Clint: [distantly] SUCK IT!

Justin: That’s right. A large, quasi-real horse-like creature appears on the ground --

Travis: I’m sorry, read that description one more time?

Justin: A large, quasi-real, horse-like creature [Travis and Clint laugh] appears on the ground. I decide the creature’s appearance, so it looks like a beautiful unicorn. It’s got, uh, big unicorn horn and rainbow colors --

Griffin: [cackling] Ho-ho-holy shit…

Justin: His name is Garyl [Griffin laughs] -- It’s like ‘Gary’ and ‘Daryl’ mixed together --

Clint: Garyl…

Justin: I’ve done more character work on Garyl than I did on Taako.

[Clint laughs]

Griffin: Holy shit…

Justin: And Garyl, in -- like, you can hear Erasure, like just -- a floating through the wind, and like, [Clint imitates the sound of a horse’s hooves hitting the ground] Garyl appears underneath Merle, and with a whinny, [Clint imitates a horse whinny] a perfectly toneal whinny, [Clint does another whinny that is pitched down more] that graces through the octaves -- [Justin goes through the octaves, making the noise of a horse, accompanied by Clint] Garyl appears below Merle [Clint imitated more of the horse running], catching him effortlessly.

	Merle: Ow!

Griffin: Yeah, Merle, you’re flying head-first towards the ground in-front of the battle wagon and this spectral unicorn appears in-front of you --

Clint: [in awe] Oh…

Griffin: And you almost do like a ring around its -- the-- the rosie around its neck, uh, because you’re moving at such velocity -- [Clint chuckles]

Justin: [crosstalk] Oh, I forgot one thing -- His mane is like more of a mullet, but he is making it work.

Griffin: Okay.

Justin: That is the most amazing thing about Garyl.

Clint: [still in awe] Ah…

Griffin: And you get two -- two hands full o’ mullet, and --

Clint: Yeah!

Griffin: And Garyl, uh -- Garyl very quickly hops out of the way of this speeding vehicle --

Clint: [chuckling, in amazement]

Griffin: Uh, avoiding, uh, a second death, and now you are riding on the back of  a spectral --

Clint: [cackling]

Griffin: This -- This game is fucking ridiculous. You are holding onto the back of a spectral unicorn, uh--

Clint: [crosstalk] It’s like riding Billy Ray Cyrus!

Justin: [snorts]

Travis: It’s exactly like that.

Griffin: And you get out of the way just as Hurley, uh, puts one of the-- the-- the-- gigantic silvery chrome ram-horn on the front-right of the battle wagon into the front-left tread that Taako just disrupted --



Ep. 25, Petals to the Metal, 11:57