[Lilly] Don't Hide These Feelings

Don't Hide These Feelings

My eyes slowly peel open, rubbing off the crust of sleep. Sunlight is streaming in through the single window on the left side of the bedroom, cascading through the blinds and laying softly on our bed. Lilly is cozily snuggled up against my side, arms around my waist and head nuzzled into my chest. It's day two of our little seven day break from university, and the first morning seemed to have went by just the same. I still don't know how I managed to successfully begin dating such a gorgeous woman back in high school. She really must have taken a hard look through some of my childish antics and personality to find something worth loving. I cock my head to the left and peer at the digital clock on my nightstand.

It reads 10:21 AM.

Well, that gives me at least a little time to get ready before my parents get here. They haven't visited the apartment yet, even though they're paying for part of the rent. But that's beside the issue. The biggest issue is that they have no clue that I have a girlfriend, or that she's living with me, and they'll be arriving around one in the afternoon. Lilly is well aware that they're coming over, and we sort of devised a plan that she'll leave before they come visit, and come back while they're still over. I'll introduce her as my girlfriend, and of course, they'll have no clue that she's been living here the whole time.

I roll my body to the right and wrap her in a massive hug. I just love the feeling of her warm, soft skin in my arms, it makes me feel as if I'm the luckiest guy on the face of the Earth. As I lean in and give her a passionate kiss on the forehead, a small giggle escapes from her lips. Her cloudy, pale blue eyes make themselves visible to me briefly afterwards.

"Good morning, sunshine," I whisper in her ear, giving her a kiss on the lips and reeling her in closer to my body. I won't lie, I'm feeling a slight bit frisky this morning; maybe there's a possibility that I can get some morning love making in before my parents arrive. Well, that shouldn't be a problem anyways, as we've got a good three or so hours before they're meant to arrive. Lilly gives me a sinister smile after our lips part, a smile that tells me she knows exactly what I'm thinking.

"Hisao, you naughty boy," Lilly giggles, running her finger down the length of my nose. "Are you sure we should try something like that right before your parents show up? I should probably be leaving to go shopping soon as well..." She trails off, probably wondering what she's going to buy. In fact, I wonder if she's just thinking about how she'll know if something looks good considering I won't be going shopping with her. Nevermind that though, more important matters are at hand right now.

I completely disregard what she said about not doing this right now. I begin planting kisses down the length of her neck, drawing some surprised, yet satisfied moans. She doesn't bother speaking out against my doings, so I continue on, slowly undoing the top portion of her nightgown. This draws a few grunts of disapproval, but no real resistance. I slide my hands along her generous curves, down to her thighs as she works on taking off my shirt.

As we both lay on the bed, half undressed and kissing passionately, things decide to abruptly come to an end. There's a loud knock on the front door of our apartment. Who in their right mind would come by this early in the morning? Giving a quick peck on the cheek to Lilly, I get out of bed, throw my shirt on and stumble out of the bedroom. I quickly retract the lock on the door, only to open it and find two very familiar faces standing outside.

"M-M-Mom? D-Dad?" I stutter out, my eyes wide with fear and mouth hanging partially open. "What are you doing here, I thought you said you wouldn't be here until around one!" I'm almost panicking at this point. I have my blind girlfriend in the bedroom, who has absolutely no idea that they're here. If she steps out of the bedroom at any point now, I'm completely screwed.

"We decided to take the early train today! It's so good to see you again!" She laughs out enthusiastically, always a woman with a positive attitude. It's still strange to me how her and my father managed to connect on any level, as he's always been that tough as nails, strict rule follower type of guy. As my mother envelops me in a hug in the doorway, I hear the noise I was hoping I wouldn't hear with these two standing in front of me: the bedroom door creaking open.

"Hisao, dear, who's at the door?" Lilly calls out, stepping out of the bedroom. She's standing there in front of my parents, in a nightgown that's not even completely done back up. My heart nearly gives out right there, knowing I have a bit of explaining to do.

"Erm, L-Lilly... would you m-mind going back in the bedroom for a few minutes?" My voice is trembling with fear. I can feel two pairs of glaring eyes searing into my back as my parents stand behind me in the doorway, switching glances between me and the attractive blonde girl standing before them. Lilly's eyebrow forms a slight arc, and I can tell she's slightly confused. My dad decides that this was as good a time as ever to clear his throat, startling Lilly a little bit and causing her face to flush completely red. She recognizes the noise from the various times that he's done it while talking to me over the phone.

"Oh, p-pardon me then.." She trails off while retreating in behind bedroom door, rushing it to close. The door slams with a quick, loud bang, leaving me to face my parents alone. I slowly pivot on my heels, turning to meet my makers once again. What I see when I turn around is actually somewhat surprising: two faces that are more surprised that disappointed. That impression is thrown out the window in a hurry though.

"So, you're bringing whores and sluts in your spare time, son?" My father bellows out, some slight rage building in his voice. "Do I need to remind you that we pay for a portion of your rent, and that-"

"Dad! She's not a whore or a slut! Holy shit, what is your problem?" I'm furious. I generally don't get angry if someone says something demeaning about Lilly, particularly because most people who do so are jealous, but this is just unbelievable. "She's my girlfriend, how is that the equivalent to being a whore?"

My mother gives me a sort of surprised look. I can't really tell if it's because of how loud I've raised my voice at my dad, or because she's shocked that Lilly is my girlfriend. Before she can get out a word though, my father continues on his rant.

"So what's wrong with her then? She couldn't see us or something? Are you taking advantage of a blind girl now? Why can't you just-"

"Get out." Two simple words, both with a common goal: to tell my father to leave my apartment. "I don't care if you pay partially for this place, I'll pay for the whole thing if this makes you that mad. Just leave me alone. Mom, you can stay, but Dad, please. Get out of my apartment. Now." I'm stern with my words. I feel really bad for kicking one of my own parents out of my home, but this has gone on far too long, and he's only been here for about five minutes. Without a word, he turns around and walks out of the door, heading over to the car. My mother stays put, with a concerned look on her face.

"Hisao, is that any way to treat your father? Look, I know he can be harsh, but he's just looking out for his son. Let's let him cool off a bit, then I'll bring him back in, okay? I really would like to meet your girlfriend!" My mom is always such a saint. Always playing the role of the mediator in an argument.

"Okay, mother. Let me go get Lilly out here so that I can formally introduce you to her," I reply, forcing myself to sound angry just so I can save a little bit of dignity. I can never get upset with her, for whatever reason. I show her into the living room and have her take a seat on the couch, before pacing towards the bedroom.

"Hey, Lilly? Can I come in?" I ask while gently tapping my fist on the door. I'm sure she's completely embarassed, even with how much of an outgoing person she is. I hope she doesn't think that she ruined her first impression from my parents, because they really haven't even had a chance to make one yet. I hear some shuffling and a somewhat quiet 'yes' as her response. I open the door to see her sitting there on the edge of the bed, changed into a nice blouse and skirt; a very motherly looking outfit, if I do say so myself. Her eyes look a little bit red, as if she was crying a little bit. About what though?

"Lilly, why were you crying?" I begin, sitting myself beside her and wrapping my arm around her shoulder. Her head now rests gently on my shoulder with her eyes closed, her warm breath bounding into my chest.

"I just wanted to make a good first impression, Hisao. I feel like I really haven't accomplished that, and now your parents may never accept-"

"Lilly, stop right now."

She lifts her head off my shoulder and faces me, her eyes drooping with sadness and curiosity.

"Listen to me. My parents have no opinion of you yet. If anything, they're frustrated with me. You have every opportunity right now to show them how you treat me, silly." My little speech earns me a kiss on the forehead from her, a sign that I've reassured her a slight bit.

"Alright dear, then how about you actually put some decent clothes on?" She really loves teasing me, doesn't she? I completely forgot that I was still wearing my bed clothes, so this question causes my cheeks to start burning. Lilly gives out a girlish giggle as her hand brushes across my firey cheeks, before quickly getting up and tossing me clothes off of our clothing hooks mounted on the wall. A sweater vest and a pair of khaki pants is what lands on my lap. For a blind girl, she knows what I love wearing.

I quickly get dressed before locking Lilly's arm in mine and leading her out of the bedroom. My mother is still waiting patiently on the couch, only this time as I enter the living room, another person sits with her. It seems like he came to a realization of what he had said to me really quickly, because he's got some damn nerve coming back into the apartment this fast. I find it almost hard to believe that he came back in already though, knowing how stubborn of a man my father is. We step into the center of the living room and stand before the two of them, as if we are just about to give a presentation in front of a panel.

"Mom, Dad... this is Lilly Satou, my wonderful and loving girlfriend," I say with some enthusiasm in my voice. "She's been living with me here since the day that I moved in, and we both met back at Yamaku when I first arrived. I can tell you, it's honestly been a joy with this girl, every single moment." As I finish my speech, I lean in and give her a quick kiss on the cheek, drawing a light blush to her face. I give her hand a little squeeze, indicating that it was her turn to introduce herself a little bit.

"Oh, hello there. As Hisao said, my name is Lilly and I'm his girlfriend. He tells me I'm just like you, Mrs. Nakai, in terms of being a great motherly figure and my ability to cook." Lilly giggles a little, as my mother blushes and gives me a large grin. It's true though; that was one of the very first compliments I gave Lilly when we moved into the apartment. Her motherly qualities are a completely different league than most girls her age.

"In any case, I figure I should address something that you may be wondering about. I am, indeed, blind," she speaks out very abruptly. I feel like this could be really hard for her to talk about, because I still don't even know how my parents necessarily feel about me dating a blind girl. It's not as much responsibility as it looks to be, to be quite honest. Sure, a little bit more work and you have to be a little extra cautious, but that's about it. "In any regard, Hisao has been a wonderful help for me since the day he set foot at Yamaku. I praise you both for raising such a wonderful gentleman."

Now I'm the one blushing in full. My mother stands up and gives Lilly a giant hug, a large grin still on her lips from Lilly's earlier compliments.  Lilly embraces the hug naturally, as if I was the one giving her the hug; gentle, sweet and motherly, as always.

"Hisao, let's make a nice lunch for your parents. I'm sure it's the least we could do for... well, not telling them that I was living with you..." She quickly trails off before making what she was saying slightly more awkward. I invite my parents to have a seat or take a look around the house, which ever they wanted to do. They both actually decided to come and take a seat at the table in the kitchen as Lilly and I got to work on a generous lunch.

----

A little bit of time passes by, as my mother and father sit in amazement at how good Lilly is at cooking. Although just a simple dish of chicken, rice and vegetables, she makes everything she does look like a work of art. I think the more impressive thing to them was that she could cook with very little guidance from me, mainly just using me for measuring out spices and such. As the meal is finally finished cooking, we dish it out onto some glass plates and present it to my parents.

"I hope you both don't mind it being such a simple dish, but we haven't gotten a chance to go out shopping this week," Lilly says cheerfully. Towards the end, though, she sort of mumbled, as she probably was planning on doing a little bit of grocery shopping today.

"Lilly, this looks wonderful. Thank you for teaching my son how to do a little bit of cooking," my father bows out graciously. This is the first thing he has said since coming back into the apartment after our minor fallout, even though he did smile a good bit as Lilly introduced herself to them.

As we all dig in, your typical discussion between parents and newly met girlfriend ensues. My parents tossed various questions in her direction: things like 'What are you studying for at university?' and 'Has Hisao been taking good care of you?' She generously and professionally replies to all of their questions, making me extremely relieved that I had chosen a bright and traditional girl to fall in love with.

As my father finishes his dish, he places his empty plate off to the side of the table before facing Lilly and my mother.

"Do you two mind if Hisao and I step outside for a few moments? I promise I won't keep him long." This draws a somewhat worried look to both of their faces, but they simply just say 'sure' and 'not a problem' before my father and I excuse ourselves from the table.

As we walk out the door and close it tightly behind us, my father turns around and faces me. His expression isn't one of anger anymore, almost one that looks like a mix of happiness, sadness and regret all in one. We stand their awkwardly for about a minute before he speaks up.

"Son, listen to me. I am extremely sorry for what I said when we first came into the apartment today," he begins, his voice unusually soft. "I was just sort of upset to see a woman dressed in a nightgown in the bedroom. It sort of took me by surprise, mainly because you never mentioned anything about her to us. But that's beside the point. I was far out of line, considering you go to university and work hard to pay for your portion of the rent, and now I realize that you're also supporting a woman who you truly love. I was a bit skeptical when I first saw that she was blind, but I think she handles herself very professionally, as well as very sweetly. I can't congratulate you enough, as your father, for doing what you're doing." He's practically tearing up at this point.

My father.

Tearing up.

This is quite a sight, but I'm more stunned that he actually is giving me his approval to continue having Lilly live with me. His first impression may have been justified had I not defended her, but I think I made it very clear what my stance was on the situation. I step forward and give him the biggest hug I think I've ever given him. He's got tears running down his face now, and I have a few coming down mine as well. After years of not ever gaining his approval, years of him being stubborn and a strict rule type of parent, he's finally giving me the green light to do as I please.

"Thanks, Dad."

"For what?"

"For finally giving me your approval."

He gives me a big slap on the back for that one.

"Well, should we go join the party again?" I ask somewhat awkwardly after we break up our hug.
"I don't see why not!" He exclaims, a huge smile arising on his face as he puts his arm around my shoulders and leads me back inside.

----

As the night begins to finally wind to and end, my parents pass along their final goodbyes to Lilly and I. The night was actually a fairly enjoyable one; we played various games, had some snacks and a nice dinner prepared in a joint effort by my mother and Lilly, and shared some stories. I'd rather not go into detail about those stories though, as some of them were embarrassing childhood stories that my mother conveniently brought up. Overall though, it was quite a better night than what I was originally expecting. Not to mention, I don't have to worry about hiding Lilly from my parents anymore.

My mother gives both Lilly and I massive hugs, as well as a kiss on the cheek for both of us. My father embraces Lilly for the only time of the night, whispering something in her ear that makes her giggle before they release their grip. Then he turned to me, first extending his hand for a handshake, as he normally does, before taking my hand and pulling me into a suffocating hug.

"You better treat that woman right boy, or you're never going to hear the end of it from me!" That's what he yelled back at me as him and my mother crossed the street, heading off towards the train station with the night sky gleaming with various stars. As Lilly and I turn around and head back into the apartment, I wrap my hand around hers and feel like crying. For whatever reason, my parents approval has really gotten me emotional today. A tear rolls off my cheek and falls onto her hand as we walk into the living room, startling her a little bit.

"Hisao, what's wrong my dear?" She asks in a soothing tone, obviously confused by the tears rolling down my face. As we sit down on the couch, she lifts her hand and wipes away the few tears that I've shed in the last few seconds.

"I think it's just that my parents f-finally approve of something that I've done in my life," I start off, stumbling over my words a little bit. "I don't think they could have a-approved of something more important to me than what's sitting before me now, wiping away my tears." I think I managed to catch her off guard, because her face has turned a very bright red, while a very embarrassed smile rises on her lips.

"Hisao, you never needed their approval. Why would you? You are who you are, and there's absolutely nothing that they can change about that. Even if it means you end up dating a blind girl, it's all up to you to decide what's right and what's wrong at this point in your life.." She's running her hand down the side of my face, a very soothing gesture. The tears stop coming after a short time, before a giant smirk arises on my face.

"Well then, my darling, what we were doing this morning was completely right." I quickly lean in to give this gorgeous woman a passionate kiss. She shoots me a look of disapproval, before giving in to her own desires.

As our lips lock, the outside world seemingly disappears.



"Don't Hide These Feelings" is a song produced by Nuage.