quote from "come as you are"

"The process of learning what is sexually relevant and what is a threat works sort of like learning a language. We're all born with the innate capacity to learn any human language, but we don't learn a random language, right? If you grow up surrounded by people who speak only English, there's no way you'll get to kindergarten speaking French. You learn the language you're surrounded by.

Similarly, you learn the *sexual* language you're surrounded by. Just as there are no innate words, there appear to be no innate sexual stimuli. What turns you on (or off) is learned from culture, in much the same way children learn vocabulary and accents from culture."

- p 61-62, Come As You Are by Dr. Nagoski