RainBRO in Manhattan Volume 3: Occupy the Fandom!

>Alright , these people are reasonable. They're just fed up and disenfranchised by a shitty and corrupt geopolitical system
>What's wrong with that?
>Head over to the park to check out the Occupy camp
>Even after they cleared out the main OWS there have still been little 2-3-day protests and booths popping up around the city
>There for two seconds and you get bitch-slapped by flier-guy again
>"Oh fuck, man, sorry! I already flier'd you."
>You imagine him on some shitty Mtv reality show where he slaps people in the face and says, "You've been flier'd!"
>Fuck it
"No prob, man..."
>Dash doesn't get the gravity of the situation and she giggles

>"You wanna come into the tent? We're having a public forum in there right now and we're discussing the first steps to take to FREEDOM."
>"You guys aren't free?"
>Dash is letting her pony show
"HA! OH GOD! Dash, you're so damn funny!"
>flier-guy isn't convinced
>"Dash, huh? That's a wild name."
>Eyes dash
>Silence
>"But I like the way you dress! You two are a trip, come look for me when you get out."
"Yeah, cool!"
>Empty promises
>You and dash head into the tent
"Listen, can you try not to talk while we're here?"
>"What?"
"Look, I don't mean it like that, but you just don't know that much about American politics yet and you really don't need people in this town poking fun at you."
>"...Hmmph."
>In the forum, people are on a tangent about gay marriage rights
>The closest thing they have to a moderator is the one guy who apparently owns the tent and who's voice is slightly louder than everybody else's
>"Okay, so our opinion on legalizing gay marriage?'
>Everyone starts wiggling their fingers toward the sky like idiots
>Why are you here

>You turn around
>Dash is trying to figure out how to wiggle her fingers so she can wiggle them like a mad woman
>Oh man
>"Well, I guess that one's settled."
>He starts pretending to write something down
>"Tent... full of Occupy hippies... approves gay marriage..."
>People start laughing at the subtle joke, and you have to admit you chuckle a little on the inside
>Dash pretends to laugh, even though she doesn't even know what gay people are
>"Okay... next issue, I guess. Who should be the next president of the United States? The current possibilities are between Mitt romney..."
>People start booing and wiggling their fingers down
>"...Rick Santorum..."
>More booing
>This time dash is booing too
>"...Newt gingrich..."
>Boo
>"...Ron Paul..."
>There's another boo, but there's a lot of approval intermixed with it. It's like a general "meh" from the crowd
>Rainbow boos, but she's a little confused by the shift in tone
>"...and Barrack Obama..."
>rainbow is the only person still booing in a crowd of applause
>"Does anyone want to make their first point?"
>He stares around the crowd and eventually points... right to you
>"Yes, you, speak."
>Turn around
>Oh god
>"What's a President?"

>People look back at the freaky girl with rainbow hair
>FFFFFFFFFFFFFFFFUCK
>Grab dash
>Fly the fuck out of that tent
>Hear laughter behind you
>Well fuck me

* * *

>"So I acted a fool, is what you're saying."
"You REALLY REALLY ACTED A FOOL. Most Americans recognize what a president is, so people back there thought you were REALLY wierd."
>"Wow. That sucks."
"If we're lucky, they'll just assume you're foreign. Really, really foreign. But from some country where things are modernized, but they don't have democracy. Like England. They have, like, Kins and Queens."
>"Whatever." She shruggs.
>This restaurant is okay
>Your burger is a little overcooked, but otherwise it's perfect
>"Seriously, though, what's a president?"
"He's like Princess Celestia, but, like, human. And not a tyrant."
>"What's a tyrant?"
"Like, a leader who just decides everything in their country without letting their people decide anything. It's generally a bad thing around these parts. That's what we call Democracy."
>"What's that again?"
"Like, when people get to have a way to get their opinions into their government. So instead of just one person, it's everyone voting on what should be done."
>"Sounds neat."
>She chomps on her burger

>You now realize that if life is ever gonna work out for her here, you're gonna have to give her a whole High School education by yourself
>You didn't even do good in High School
"Hey, lets go home."
>"Okay."
>You pay the check and get outta there, back to the apartment

* * *

>Rainbow dash absolutely loves her show
>You're teaching her all about the fandom
>What initially scared the hell out of her is now her new obsession
>God damn, you're suprised you haven't sent the universe into a paradox by now
>"That's funny as hell! Fluttershy is totally like that, except with the rape thing!"
>You even show her a clopfic to let her know what those exist, and she cracks up reading Swayback Mountain
>"HA! Fuckin' Jack and Rarity! Knew those two had something!"

>Lastly you show her Derpy
>She finds this the most intriguing because her character was made entirely by the fandom and they absolutely nailed the real Derpy
>Derpy fanfics instantly become her favorite pastime
>She cries manly tears at Today, Tomorrow, and Forever
>You show her all about her speaking role in the show
>How it got changed
>Unnacceptable.jpg
>"Wait, that new voice sounds NOTHING like Derpy! They changer her eyes, too! Why would they do that?"
"Because here in the human world we have a lot of humans who have things like crossed eyes and other problems that aren't their fault, but they hinder their performance in life. They're called, "Disabled people"."
>"That sounds like kind of a mean word."
>...
"You know what, you're right. But, that's what's socially appropriate, or "politically correct"."
>She takes a mental note on being "politically correct"
>"But Derpy isn't disabled! She's just a little... ditzy."
"I agree, i think the change was bullshit too, but the people who make the show had a good reason to change it. They had a bunch of people write in claiming that disabled people were offended by the way they made Derpy in the show."
>"Why? Were they disabled?"
"Well, no. I don't think anyone who was offended was actually disabled, but-"
>"Well they should shut their mouths then!"

"Dash, you can't just exclude someone's opinion like that, it's-"
>"No! I don't think the people who make the show should have changed it, They're tyrants!"
>ohboyherewego.jpg
>"I'm... I'm occupying the internet!"
>She raises her fist in the air in rebellion
>You both stand there for a little bit
"Uh-huh."
>"Get a tent! And people!"
>You lower Dash's fist like a total mom
"Dude, you can't do that."
>"Why can't i occupy the internet?"
"Because..."
>You try to quickly prepare all the reasons in order from least to greatest
"Because first of all, it's not that big a deal. Seriously, it's just one episode. Secondly, because you can't set a tent up on my computer. Third, because, like those REAL "Occupists" out there, you're MOST LIKELY not going to change anything. Fourthly, because it's JUST ONE SCENE. LASTLY, this is America. The little guy's opinion means much more than the majority here. I'm sorry, but that's just the way it is."
>She sorta looks a little sad, but sees the logic in what you're saying.
>"But they changed Derpy... They can't do that..."
"Exactly. They can't. That's why it's only a TV show."
>She looks up and hugs you

-END-