Story of Master Abraham Von Juwelen the Sailor

“O God, the mirror of your beauty is this heart.

Our soul is rose petal and your love like the nightingale.

In the beauty of your light I see myself without a self

Thus in this world everyone’s intent is he himself.”

An account of meeting my best friend and true Teacher

I was a drunk in those days, I started going because I thought I could make some friends, take my mind off of home-life, I would sit long hours by himself, order a whisky, sit alone, look at the other people talking, think about building up the courage to talk to them, I felt so alone. Each time I would go, I would drink more whisky, I would gag on it and eventually I learned if I added ice, it would go down smoother, I would sit there, drink and as the music and people enjoyed themselves, I would just stand back and look at myself thinking “what am I doing here” it was a peculiarly bad night, a Friday, when I first heard his voice, I was alone again, among people, trapped in that bar with no where to go and no one to go to. I picked up my glass and forced down the carbolic fluid into my mouth, coughing as it slid down my throat.

I heard someone say “add a little water to your drink, the middle-mixed drink goes down smooth and tastes much better” I go to turn my head to see who was it who spoke to me, but there was too much movement behind me to really tell. I figured I’d try it, asked for a glass of water, mixed it myself and drank. I didn’t cough it up.  I drank a lot more than I usually could that night.

I returned the next night to do my same routine, sit alone in my chair, drink and wonder why I’m here alone. But having mixed my drink I was able to drink much more that night, I became so intoxicated that I actually mustered the nerve to talk to someone in the next chair over, a light skinned frail man, rather shy looking, we had idle chit-chat, after some more drink got into him he told me he was here because a close friend of his killed himself, and he had tried to visit and knock upon his door no less than three times the day of the suicide, he told me how he himself suffered from a dark sorrow because of this. I felt a perverse sense of comfort that we were both here, in our own interior darkness, comforted, but slightly jealous that I didn’t have such a friend, Disgusted with myself for thinking such thoughts i ordered another round and challenged him to see which of us could drink more. As we drank more, we both began to laugh, Joke and forget our troubles. His name was Menahem Philos.

Eventually menahem’s friends came to meet up with him and drink with him, Rather tall sturdy people, all wearing fancy clothes and jewelry. 7 men all in all.  We actually surprisingly hit it off well, they were smiling and laughing like nothing bad had ever happened, we drank, we ate and I let myself go, felt like peace,really felt like I was a part of the group, that I wasn’t alone by myself but I was like an old friend they had always known.

We got incredibly drunk, as the bar was closing they told me to come with them to another place they know where we could keep up our partying, I stayed awake with them and walked with them for a little while. But I couldn’t hold my head up, I felt myself looking consciousness, I passed out.

I then woke up in what I could have told was early morning from the dawn light coming in, I was in a small room with a window, something was upon my head, I cleaned my head off and bits of what looked like seaweed were in my hair and on my four head. I looked around to get my bearings but felt the floor shake and wobble. I walked towards the door and stumbled my way to what looked like a bridge of a unmanned ship. We were on the waters, I felt a nausea in my stomach at the thought, but carried on anyways. I came to the next door I could find which led into a little bedroom with a peculiar display case, the display case had four levels stacked one atop the other. this wasn’t particularly odd, bur the peculiar thing was how large were the gems which the display contained, On the bottom most shelf was carved the letter H and sat one jewel. The first a pretty red Gem carved to look like skeletons embracing each other in a hug, smiling forward, their arms embracing each other and their smirks exaggerated. I would later come to learn this Jewel is a Balas Ruby.

The Second shelf had engraved the letter V and upon it a singular Jewel also, A pinkish Red gem which shined much brighter than the previous jewel, it was carved into the image of Three roses sitting next to each other, two beneath and one rose sitting atop them. I would later learn this jewel is called a Carbuncle

Upon the third Shelf was engraved the letter H but sat 3 jewels. At the left most shined a Aqua-tinted jewel, I guessed accurately that this one was an aquamarine. It was shaped into the form of a Angry faced woman with demons teeth, half naked, bearing a curved blade in one hand and a bowl in the other both made of the same gem.

In the center was a yellowish-green stone, the bottom of it was carved to look as if the sun with 12 Rays, 6 rays straight and 6 curved. And standing upon this solar disk was the image of a ugly creature, it had four legs, the body of a man, two arms extending from his front legs, a hand protruding from its chest, it was covered with delicately carved eyes and it “held” a curve dagger in each hand. I would later come to learn this one is made from Chrysolite.

At the right most was a jewel the color of it a very dark Reddish brown, it was carved into the image of a Man wearing a robe, a simple blind fold and missing his left ear. I would later find that this gem is a Almandine. Finally upon the top shelf was engraved the letter Y, and a deep dark blue stone which depicted a great Medusa with her wrathful triangular face, covered in serpents had sitting atop it a reddish-orange Jewel carved in the appearance of a old drunken fat man, in his left hand he held a trident and in his right a bottle of liquor. These gems I would find out later were sapphire and jacinth respectively.

“Things of beauty aren’t they” said the voice which I heard before but did not see. I turned my head and I saw an old man, his beard and mustache was White and grey, his beard long, his eyes sunken in, his nose fat, wearing a dark blue fisherman’s Cap with a silver star upon it, Black Overalls and a white sweater.

I wasn’t panic, I asked him how did I get here? He said “my men were home for a little while, check in on family and rest, drink and eat until they got their fill, you drank with them and passed out, they couldn’t leave you on the street and they knew I always have an extra room”

 I tried thanking  him but he kept talking “these jewels are things of beauty, they’ve been in my family since before anyone could remember, the top two I lost once but a dear friend gave them back to me. Do you know which one I value most?” I looked a little while and told him that I couldn’t guess other than perhaps drunk man holding the trident. He said “good guess boy but it’s this one” he went behind the display case and retrieved a little black box, he opened it and pulled out what looked like a normal multi-color rock, he said “this piece of uncarved granite, i could speak of it as having no less than 60 virtues, but chief among all else, my greatest Friend gave it to me, showing it to me was the greatest treasure a man could ask for.”

He continued speaking “Come with me and you might be able to meet my great friend.”

I said “go where? If you mean with you on this both I have no skill and know nothing of boats, besides I have too much weighing me down I can’t just get up and go.”

He replied “ follow me and you will gain skill, you will gain the knowledge of the boat. The only one who could stop you from coming along is yourself.”

Silently he walked me to the deck of the large fishing boat, the experience was overwhelming, rusted orange  metal, the sea Air, Blue water, the smell of pure salt-water

Internally I let go, would it really be so bad to begin again? As I walked with him, I reasoned that before meeting these people I was alone, then they gave me friendship, a place to rest, as I was thinking these things he told me “your heads still mixed up? I got something for you that’ll sober you right up.” He led me to a dimly lit mess deck, it had tiles the color of black and white in a checkerboard pattern, and red pipes throughout. He left me for a moment and returned with a dark red bottle and something that looked like hard crackers, on the bottle was the image of a man with a snake coming out of his mouth drinking wine out of a glass which he held. He said “best way to sober a man up is to down the Good stuff and eat some Hardtack, they both go down heavy, There’s a reason they call it hardtack and wormcastle”

He poured out some wine into a cup and placed some of the bread before me, I went to go grab it but he said “not yet” then he spoke “umem suproc mine t’se coh” he then said “now you eat, its been a tradition since ancient Rome, watch you’ll feel like a new man.”

I picked up the hard cracker and chewed on it, nearly choking on it, I let out some tears, I then drank the wine. I told him “thank you”

Suddenly I did start to feel much more clear headed, like a weight was taken off my back. He looked at me, somehow knowing what I felt, his eyes burning like Fire. I tried to speak but whatever I tried to muster couldn’t come out. He just sat there in silence, looking at me, and I he.

I let go again, just letting flow out of my lips what must be said.

 “ Jouissance and dysphoria is all about me

  Overjoyed but in metanoia from thee

 Never before have I felt such companionship

Ambivalent turbulence i feel about apprenticeship,

Honoring the words of one unknown

2 times,  let me never be alone”

He smiled at me and said “you could just speak to me and say yes” he laughed “alright, you’re already acquainted with the crew, menahem and the seven others will instruct you before our journey, we leave in 12 hours, we’ll discuss more permanent employment after we’ve returned from China” so for twelve hours the men instructed me on what to wear, how to act, what to do, what to clean. Finally we set out to sea, the setting of the sun over the horizon shining on the bright green waters. A feeling of freedom washed over me. I stood there, appreciating the beauty of the sun, the majesty of the sea and the glory of the vastness of the Sky.

all the colours of the world and heaven slowly finished their magnificent festival, slipping one by one away before the imminent approach of night. the sailors lighted lanterns and hung them round the ship, and the light flashed out illuminating the dark sea.

And then the sailors knelt on the decks and prayed, all together, yet in silence. Side by side there kneeled down together, the first man in front, behind him another man, behind him 3 and behind them 2, and as they prayed menahem walked along going back and forth amongst them, so I prayed also.

And upon us praying the night came suddenly down, as it comes upon all men who pray at evening and upon all men who do not, yet our prayers comforted our own souls when we thought of the Great Night to come.

The men then got up, went to their place of rest, as did I. Yet I could not sleep. Upon going to this small room now my own, the anxiety of loneliness and confusion that I felt before had come upon me, but multiplied greatly. Where even was I ? In confusion I stepped back on to the deck, and looked upon the dark Sea, dimly lit by the lanterns of our boat.  Darkness surrounding me and no longer was anyone there with me, not even menahem. All of these thing afflicted me and I sat there, lost, alone, in darkness suddenly thunder roared and the breakers of the waters raged. the waves broke over the boat, so that it was nearly swamped, So much fear and anxiety washed over me, I knew I couldn’t do anything, that no matter what it was pointless to fight. So I let go and made peace that if I were to die here, that it was my choice and that it was good even if I died, for I had known true friendship for a short time.

Suddenly the fear left my body and I saw something moving in the waters, the storm raged yet a spot stood perfectly still. I went closer to try to see what it was, ignoring the storm and rage. I fell off the deck of the boat and into the waters. And as I fell deeper and deeper into the dark waters, I did not fear. Suddenly I was no longer falling nor in water, and I beheld with my eyes something unspeakable, a great fish having 49 eyes, the sharp arms of a giant, its tongue was the head of a lion and the neck of a horse, it had the face of a child and its body secreted red fluid, like blood and much water poured out of it. Its majesty and power, its size and the radiant glow of its eyes, the strength in it beyond me. Yet it holding me, looked at me in peace. It held me close and embraced me, I felt peace, I felt love. I felt true love. The creature then plucked with its hand all of its eyes, mixed them with the secretions, and crushed it with its mighty hand. As it opened its palm I saw an uncarved piece of granite, he gave it to me.

I then woke up in my bed upon the boat, but upon my chest lay the Granite. I sat up holding it, thinking about the love I felt, the peace. I looked around the small room, and noticed above my bed was a gourd and its vine which I had never noticed before.

Menahem entered my room as I still held the granite, he spoke saying “its time to return Home now that you have what we came to China for, Abraham”