Lost Brother

The old spot seemed good enough for this.

Not far to go, and yet far enough to make sure that they would not be overheard by any people. Leading her by the hand, upon arrival on the spot, his scarlet eyes turned to her, inquisitively observing her - just what she had to tell him, and what could be so important at the moment?

Only one way to find out.

"What did you want to tell me?"
(Arthur Rowan)


"Well.."

 Perhaps, he could tell that she was rather nervous- for she avoids his gaze at every moment possible, perhaps, blaming herself that she was unable to truly protect what had belonged to him in the first place. Believe it or not though, a part of her still felt as if she were back there- amongst the flying elements and rocks, so much so, that even the bruising upon her back, legs, and hands pulsed at the thought. She visibly 'winces' as she 'trudges' up the confidence enough to speak about what had happened..

"Me and other students were in the cave...We were mining and we found Ikkaku." Perhaps, he knew where this was going to go. "We saw him absolutely shred a Gehennan in half and...And just as we were about to go at him, your brother came in." Her gaze flickers briefly...Hands clenching into tight fists, looking down withinher lap.

"And we fought.." A part of her wasn't sure as to how she could continue this. Between the nervous shake of anticipation and the uncertainty bubbling within her mind, she almost didn't have the nerve to say all that she could.

"Ikkaku said that there would be no stopping him until demons and necromancy were handled...And then he threatened us. All of us. Either we join his side or we perish with them...It's like choosing Valmasia and Jianghu." A moment of silence...For now, she just pauses, inhaling heavily and allowing him to atleast...

 Soak in the moment.
(Bei Bei)

While he anticipated some of her struggles as usual, and he already prepared himself to advise or even help her properly, he certainly wasn't ready for this at all. The usual expression of Rowan had turned from something casual and unfazed into one that of concern, terror, and even a twist of anger--

-- how? How could this happen?

Someone like Ikkaku was still a threat at large, true, and moreso it was more than likely a bad idea to combat him like that; especially considering just how powerful he's been, enough to defeat Archons. Unless one was capable of such feat- or at least, almost capable- it seemed like a futile task to combat him. And yet, they did.

Something twitched in his chest. His heart wasn't in the right place.

She could even hear a sharp inhale coming from him, like a shock spreading throughout his body; it couldn't just be like this! But knowing the likes of Ikkaku, there was only one suggestion to make - Theodore has fallen.

Arthur's fist was clenched. In a quiet tone, he spoke.

"Is... is my brother dead?"
(Arthur Rowan)


"..."
"..."
"..."

"I tried.." Her head is casted down towards the rushing rapids below. She allows her self confidence to become a balancing act, teetering across a thin rope as she tries to come up with the next words that she could possibly fathom within the moment. The truth of the matter is...Is that there were two separated sides of the coin. One in which-..

"The words that your brother wrote on my-..On my weapon makes me believe so but what Ikkaku said makes me think that he saved him. All I know is that he was talking about making a change and- and he said your brother was still alive and that he would send him back...I really, I don't know. All I saw was blood." He could interpret it as he desires but she could give him no straight answer.

"All I know for sure is that Ikkaku took him in." Her own hand reaches for his clenched fist if only for the moment...An attempt to unravel it begins as she extends her blade to him.

"Here, it says...'Tell Arthur I love him, don't let him look for my body - I can feel myself withering away. So long Valmasia." It was questionable, extremely so indeed.

But she couldn't outright tell Arthur that his brother might have orchestrated such. Nor was she certain if Theodore had actually lived or died. This...Was just a big, big conundrum.

"Sorry."
(Bei Bei)

The heartbeat quickens.

Hearing this was like taking a knife in his heart, and yet, there seemed to be no cure, and no relief in death from such wound- there was only pain, one that wracked at his very soul and mind, one that would surely grant him restless days and sleepless nights, one that he would not get rid of anytime soon.

One that others will feel too.

His chest was raising and falling at a faster rate- his breathing has gotten rapid, almost akin to hyperventilating, and his both fists remained clenched- there was no comfort found in Bei's hand that caressed his own hand in such state, there was almost no attention paid to her.

There was only distress, and there was only thought on how to fix it.

Yet, no matter what he thought of, he didn't know. Ikkaku took him in, and yet, he had time to scribe this down? No... something wasn't right. He had to be alive, there was no other explanation to this- the redhead didn'tfeel good about this, for he was lost and scared at what's to come.

The air around him tensed. Almost on subconscious level, the very reality around him began to shake with the presence of his magic- the fabric and tether of the realm began to rip apart, the vision shaking, and the lightning around him crackling; he couldn't calm down, and that much reflected on his magic, just ready to explode on anyone at any given moment.

"This--"

"This can't be true, no... he's not dead..."

"He has to be alive!"

Almost as if thunder itself roared, the voice of Rowan stretched out across the land, filling the ears of any unfortunate with the rage and pain of Valmasian.

Of a boy that lost his family.
(Arthur Rowan)

"..I don't believe he's dead. No matter how cruel Ikkaku might seem to everyone who sides with Valmasia, I can't imagine him actually killing a kid. He isn't the one guy that he was beating up...He isn't mean. And rude- he just went overboard." SHe says softly, a heavy frown beginning to appear upon her lips. "By all means, he's still the enemy but why would he kill kids...When he can simply turn them into his own. You know, he is still looking for warriors...Though, if I know anything about your brother, he's more of a fighter than anything. Forget about what he put on my staff." She says, a frown deepening as she leans over...Her arms attempting to pull upon the Rowan- extremely aware of the polarized area but still...Desiring to hold onto him. To atleast comfort him within his time of turmoil..

 "Calm down-...Calm down. I know what your brother put on my weapon but Ikkaku said he was alive. Surely, Ikkaku would know- he's...He's did all of this before." And then, she must give him hope. Hope that his brother is out there somewhere. Hope- that they might possibly meet...

 And that the terms won't be like what Mrs. Grauhimmel stated.

 "You've only lost something when you've gotten all of the proof. If it's not there- if his body isn't there, then you don't know. It's Ikkaku's word against my own 'dumbness'..." she says, her frown deepening-

 "Don't...Please don't lose yourself. It's okay to be angry but don't change.." She could make him promise but she knows how it is to be alone. And to lose a piece of yourself that depended the most on family..

 "Hold it in.."

 It was wrong to tell him such a thing. To tell him to bottle these emotions when knowing that there could be an overflow. But perhaps, that is what she is expected. Sometimes, it's better to give rain as a warning before the storm. He can cry but..

 Anything else must come after.
(Bei Bei)

There was hope.

While there was certainly a notion of belief that he's still alive, it was mix-matched with doubt- until Bei Bei made a point that Ikkaku would not kill a child like that. It is somewhat lowly, but it's a good thing that he wouldn't - losing his brother so early would be absolutely heart-wrenching to Arthur, and not something that he'd be able to cope with easily. But did he not lose him already? If he were to be converted by Ikkaku as she claimns, then--

-- there's only one real way out. Inevitable clash of brothers.

The seething rage that reflected upon reality itself refused to die down for quite a while. Perhaps only thanks to Bei Bei clinging on him, and reminding him to keep a hold of himself, the arcs of electricity were slowly dying out, combined with the surge of pure mana all around him- the anger was quick to be replaced with sorrow and despair, filling his heart, soul and mind to the brim. The thoughts of revenge were replaced by anguish, and the scarlet eyes have turned their gaze to the ground.

"I--"

"I want to see him... I don't want to lose him to Ikkaku's convertion, or to see him die. I'm... I'm lost at what to do. I can't just go there alone and try to bail him out, it'd be a suicide. I don't have people to come with me either, it's just--"

Arthur couldn't cope with it. Sitting down on the edge, his hands inevitably went up to his head, grasping at each side- his head bowed, his presence silent, and his gaze turned away from her - he didn't want her to see his eyes turn watery, or to see him cry; but no matter how much he tried to hide it, there was still a quiet sob. 'Men don't cry', they used to teach him, but... how can he not? He lost his family.

"I don't know what to do..."
(Arthur Rowan)

Sometimes, there are things that you cannot do. But if she told him that, then she knew that he would lose all hope. And she could not afford for him to suddenly become helpless and uncaring about the world like many other children have. She saw it within those that had lost everything in the Academy, but the thought of losing him was something that she could not fathom- especially, when she had just revealed her true feelings in such a manner. Perhaps, it was different than one might have expected- but this heart of hers...

 While it might seem chaotic and uncertain at times, is terribly big- and terribly passionate about all things considered...Even the most miniscule. "Stop...Stop right there." Her hands would have raised carefully, each pressing on either side of his features while she begins to speak..

"What makes you think that you can't look at me anddo things like that? What makes you think that you're helpless?" Her smile widens, if only briefly...Sincerity and appreciation both shown as she grips onto his collar.

 "You're a Rowan. You guys have been through the wilderness, have fought off demons and men- have been through all of that hell and back and you think that just because this happens, that you just 'can't'?" she questions. "He might be gone now, but remember what it was that you wanted." Bei murmurs.

 "You have the power to do so many things...You're so good, so strong, how..how dare you even disrespect your own name by saying you don't know what to do when the path is there! How dare you just...Just...Let this happen without saying that you'll get him back at any cost." Her grip tightens briefly, pulling him closer.

 "Do you know how many people fought for him back there?-- HE wasn't alone and you aren't alone either. I-I'm here for you...Me and Joy and Fourty-Eight and Ian...We're all here!" She adds. "It's okay to cry- It's alright to be hurt but don't say you don't know when you do...You've always known what to do. You just...You've just gotta know.."
(Bei Bei)

Perhaps it was just a moment of weakness.

But at that very moment, at the second he found out that his brother was gone to someone like Ikkaku, despair overwhelmed him from head to toe- it seemed as if almost nothing could be really done at this point, and such force could not be defeated, and yet... there was still a spark of hope beating within his heart, one that dictated he still should try.

And until he does? There's no rest to be had.

Certainly, he isn't up to par to fight someone like Ikkaku, no; in fact, not even close. It was at the moment that she took him by the collar and pulled him closer, and those words hit his hears - that he cannot disgrace himself by giving up like that, that he's a Rowan, that he's fought things even worse in the past. And yet, he's here, still alive.

She was right.

This wasn't going to be easy, but this shouldn't end here so soon. There wasso much to live for, to strive for, to actually try and reach out to his brother again- even if it meant facing off against someone as powerful as Ikkaku. No, he couldn't give up so soon.

"I'm--"

"Thanks... these words mean a lot to me."

He has fallen silent. His gaze drifted off somewhere, in contemplation - just what exactly he can do? Perhaps grow in power, to match Ikkaku, and gather people that would assist him with endeavour of freeing Theodore? But--

-- remembering the last words given, perhaps he's with Ikkaku now, fighting on the other side? Maybe his brother betrayed him. He didn't know for certain.

"I'll... I'll still try. You're right. It's too soon to be giving up. I can't... can't just let it go just yet."

A sharp inhale. He had to steel himself for what's to come.
(Arthur Rowan)

She could see how these things would go. She could only imagine the worse outcome of this - which mean that two brothers would eventually clash with one another in the worst way. And to be completely honest, she wasn't sure if she were ready for either outcome. If her mind and intuition tells her right- then she knows just exactly how this could go. But to digress, the young girl merely presses her lips together...pursing slightly as she nods.

 "Letting go means that you're giving up everything that you and your brother have worked hard for...If anything, do what I said.." She says, bringing her hands down towards his fist- holding it within both of her own. "Hold it in- and then when the time comes- just make your enemy feel everything. I think then and there, would be a good time for you to become more." To become just as violent as the winds that have whipped and stirred towns. Like the waters that has drowned masses underneath their weight. And like the lightning that has claimed the lives of so many within a glorious light...

 Leaving no trace but severe burns.

 She knows he's capable. "We'll do this together. And you'll win- you'll do all that you can because I know..I believe in you." If only briefly, would she lean over once more, pressing her lips upon his cheek as his gaze averts.

 "We all knew that this wasn't gonna be easy, that's why we're here...Aren't we?"
(Bei Bei)

Emotion. The greatest bane and greatest blessing.

Isn't it what was deemed by the Archon Tragedy in her White Testament? It certainly was. Perhaps, bottling it in was fairly hard to do, but it could also pay off- drawing upon such strong feeling, such strong desire to see his brother once more, even if he were to be disappointed... it's quite the powerful thing to draw from, and her advice was taken to a heart.

He'd have fallen silent. There needed to be some time for him.

It was a hard pill to swallow. To just box in all these emotions and only act on them when necessary, it wasn't easy- but control was yet another step to what he aspired to be. To become the powerful, dreaded magi that would bring back Valmasia to its glory - he would not be able to do that, if he were to simply succumb to something like this and let himself go sour.

"I... suppose I have no choice."

"It burns... but it doesn't mean that I will die. There's a lot for me to do- even more than previously, if anything. I--"

The scarlet eyes turned to her after he felt the kiss on his cheek. Despite such troublesome events, she was there for him, and she didn't betray her word of staying with him. It's something he noted... it's something he would hold dearly.

Especially for the hard times to come.

"...Thank you for being here, Bei."
(Arthur Rowan)

Her mind wanders to the Archons on a daily basis- uncertain as to why their 'natural' being was always pushed towards corruption within the first place. She had knew in history that things were different- that the demons and yokai had served similar purposes but even then, the demons were more complete...Perhaps, even more capable of perceiving what humans felt. And maybe, just maybe, that is why ones like Eiphraem exists. The one that shows mercy and passion- the one that must not only learn to feel the motion, but also, express it. Within matters like these...It almost reminded her of how humans are as well..

 For when a new, raw, intense emotion comes- it is often met with sudden curiosity and wonder. A child-like thing that attempts to discern just what was going in within their fluttering hearts. And even now, she swears that she could see it. The Rowan deciding how to use this...The Rowan deciding that her bad advice might be the way to go...

 After all- emotions are a hard pill to swallow. And when bottled enough, it all can be much, much more catastrophic. But maybe, that was the point. For someone to break and be remade by these fighting hands...To watch him fall, but to catch him, and show him that there were strengths in having cracks and marks here and there...

 He'd get it soon.

 "I know that it hurts...I feel the same fire too, all the time. But I use it to push me on, I use it to help me fight when I don't think I can go on anymore. It's that burning feeling that lets me know that I'm still alive...Even when I don't think that I want to be." Death is an odd concept. "I'm going to live because that fire...That fire is everything to me." She nods briefly.

 "Don't thank me, Arthur- after all, it's what I'm here for." A mild blush appears on her features as she nods. "I'm yours." After all, it's only natural.
(Bei Bei)

It could be something to use in the future.

It is something that he would reflect on, in his future adventures- but while he was looking back at the teachings of someone like Tragedy, he despised Demons for what they were. Entirely selfish, and unable to fully comprehend humanity, they were the ones to build upon the graveyard of Avalon - and they were the ones that oft disrespected him and his people. He lived in Gaiar Aetherius for long enough to acknowledge just how cruel the Demonic masters can be.

And the fact that he had to run away from becoming Accursed? It only proved this much.

For now, his mind calmed- his heart was still beating with intensity of a burning flame, with the gale of the mightiest tornado, with the strength of biggest ocean, and yet these emotions were contained - only to be released upon a single unfortunate soul, sometime in the future. Who that'd be, one might ask? Only time will tell.

"I know..."

"You and I, we're not so different. We are lost, and we had to find ourselves- we are abandoned, and we had to fight for ourselves. We had almost no one - but now, we have each other."

The fire in his heart could probably be only quenched by her presence; she was like a single anchor of his to soothing embrace, and he could not deny that. His hands took her frame closer to himself, choosing to feel her in his arms once more.

"I'm yours too."
(Arthur Rowan)