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- ********************************** THE MATRIX IRC (mIRC) ***********************
- ******** STORY BY Enstyne (bofh@phreaker.net)
- ******** Best viewed @ 800x600 in notepad.exe with the screen maxed
- ********
- ******** Please excuse any errors, i did try and make the story as much as
- ******** possible simular to the real story, although some stuff i may of just
- ******** forgot or left out because it wouldn't of fit.
- ********
- ******** The characters may have a slight change in attitude, this is normal,
- ******** lol, and is because they themselves have to be influenced by the
- ******** author, i.e me. Other characters may have a BIG change, or others will
- ******** change and change back. Best to take it as it goes, go with the flow
- ********
- ******** Don't forget to email me with your comments :)
- ******** Also check out #cyberarmy on irc.cyberarmy.com
- ******** That's the place i usually hang out :)
- ********
- ******** Enstyne
- ********************************************************************************
- # Final Note: ?G0t* is a trademark of the Chawmp.
- # permission must be given prior to use
- # by him personally and may only be used
- # until his designated ?G0t expiry date!
- #
- # :) lol
- ********************************************************************************
- *** Connected To Matrix-IRC 6667
- Now talking in #chat...
- Topic is 'how much wood could a wood chuck chuck?'
- Set by leetobastard on 19th of May 2001
- --------------------------------------------------
- <Neo> hey guys, sup?
- <ManiaMan> h1 ne0
- <Neo> w4zzz4h
- <acknsin> rofl
- <Neo> ?
- <acksin> lol @ leet speak
- <acksin> leet speak is for lamers
- <Neo> STFU
- <ManiaMan> gonna get back to codin' up dis mofo...
- <acksin> rofl... lamers
- *** acksin (w00t@ch0wn.net) has parted #chat
- <shitserv> whatcha coding mania?
- <ManiaMan> oh, i've almost finished my clicker... in perl.
- <shitserv> cool!
- <shitserv> let me put it on my fserv when i'm done
- * Neo is away: sleep [MatrixIRC msglog on] [MatrixIRC pager on]
- <ManiaMan> k
- <shitserv> thanx man
- <ManiaMan> np
- --------------------------------------------------
- (2 hours later)
- ** DCC Chat From ?"YTR^$%?%?TWSEY$%?$%
- <?"YTR^$%?%?TWSEY$%?$%> wake up neo.
- <?"YTR^$%?%?TWSEY$%?$%> the matrix has you.
- <Neo> WTF?
- <?"YTR^$%?%?TWSEY$%?$%> Follow the white rabbit...
- <Neo> omg, wtf?
- <?"YTR^$%?%?TWSEY$%?$%> *beep* *beep*
- ** DCC Chat closed
- ** Query from Tman
- <Tman> Hey, man, you there?
- <Neo> who are you?
- *** Tman is now known as Troy
- <Troy> it's me
- <Neo> oh
- <Troy> got the trojans?
- <Neo> i'll dcc them, hold on
- <Troy> thanx man, your a liphe-saver
- <Neo> if you get caught using those....
- <Troy> don't worry man, you never existed
- * Neo feels ill
- <Troy> what's wrong man?
- <Neo> ever get the feeling... that things arn't what they seem, a minute ago i
- could of sworn my computer was just talking to me.
- <Troy> it's called windows man, it's the only way of liphe!
- <Troy> ... hey, man, wanna join our channel?
- <Neo> nah, i've got people to sub70rize....
- <Troy> i really think you should come :)
- ** WhiteRabbit invites you to join #rave
- Now talking in #rave...
- Topic is 'ddddddaaaa dee da de dooooo da dee da da dooo da da.. do dee daaaaaa'
- Set by Troy on 18th of May 2001
- --------------------------------------------------
- <Neo> ......
- * Neo hears another pin drop
- <Trinity> Hello Thomas, i am Trinity
- <Neo> how the f**k do j00 know my name?!
- <Trinity> that is something i can't say, you must trust me.
- <Neo> are you.... THE trinity, that cracked the irish government's computer
- systems?
- <Trinity> that was a long time ago neo, i used to hack macdonalds.
- <Neo> ow.
- -Trinity- I know why your here
- -Trinity- and I know why, you spend every night on your computer
- -Trinity- Your searching....
- >>Neo -Trinity-: a/s/l?
- -Trinity- no, i don't mean porn, you are searching for the answer
- >>Neo -Trinity-: what is the matrix?
- -Trinity- yes. I found morphious, the person who you are looking for.
- he told me that, i wasn't really looking for the matrix.
- I was looking for mad cyber-sex0r
- .... He was right
- >>Neo -Trinity-: argh, gtg.. cya some other time
- *** Disconnected*** The next day.....
- *** Connected To Matrix-IRC 6667
- Now talking in #chat...
- Topic is 'how much wood could a wood chuck chuck?'
- Set by leetobastard on 19th of May 2001
- --------------------------------------------------
- <Neo> crap, the ircops are after me
- <Neo> i sub7'd one.
- <Neo> omg they are coming.
- <ManiaMan> Neo, i've got something for you, i need to dcc
- <Neo> hurry
- <Neo> 70%
- <Neo> done
- <ManiaMan> k
- <Neo> wtf is server.exe?
- <ManiaMan> you must trust me neo
- ** Connection Established with Morphious
- there are ircops after you.
- carefully, do /topic #agents
- <Neo> shit!!
- yes....
- you must do exactly as i say without question
- understand?
- <Neo> ok ok
- They are looking at the nicks with N
- so switch........ now!
- ** Neo is now known as oNe
- ah, rot1.
- stay there for just one moment.
- ....
- ...
- okay, you need to disconnect, and connect to the second server
- in the /links from your server
- stay low, and use the bnc
- <Neo> done.
- there's two channels you must exit. that's #chat and #rave.
- <Neo> how do j00 know all this?!
- there's no time for specifics now Neo.
- <Neo> omg, no way am i gonna reconnect...
- there's two ways to stay on this network
- that's by evading until they forget.
- Or try explain to them and take a risk.
- The choice, I leave to you.
- ** Connection Dropped
- *** Disconnected
- *** Connecting to Matrix2-irc 6667
- (decides not to evade and goes to ircops)
- Now talking in #operhelp
- Topic is 'find that bastard'
- Set by ChanServ on the 1st of Janurary 1961
- ----------------------------------------------------------------
- <Neo> turning myself in
- -Matrix2-irc- You were forced to join #interrogation
- Now talking in #interrogation
- Topic is 'find that bastard'
- Set by ChanServ on the 1st of Janurary 1961
- ----------------------------------------------------------------
- <Smith> well mr. neo, it looks like you've been pretty busy for quite some time
- now.
- <Smith> it seems... you've been leading two clients.
- <Smith> the first one is involved with jeet hax0ring
- <Smith> where you crack into protected systems with leet trojans
- <Smith> and deface them under the name of 'Ron885'
- <Smith> .... and are guilty of virtually every software crime we have a law for.
- <Smith> the other, is a normal j00ser...
- <Smith> who even helps the lamers out with perl coding.
- <Smith> one of these connections, has a future.
- <Smith> i'm willing to wipe the slate clean, give you a fresh start.
- <Smith> .... my colleages think i'm wasting my time here, that you will not
- respond.
- <Smith> all you have to do, is tell me what contact you had with the
- international terrorist called 'morphious'.
- <Neo> well, that sounds like a really good deal.
- * Smith hmmmms...
- <Neo> but i think i've got a better one.
- <Neo> i give you the finger
- -> [Smith:FINGER]
- <Neo> and i make a phone call to your isp for harassment. You don't scare me
- with the gestappo crap, i don't have to reveal who i've been chatting
- with.
- <Smith> tell me, Mr. Neo. How can you make a phone-call.... if you don't.. have
- net2phone?
- <Neo> OMG
- <Neo> WTF????
- <Neo> NOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOO
- *** Connection Reset by peer.
- *** mIRC Terminated
- ..... later on the next morning, Neo gets a phone call
- Hello, do you still want to meet securely?
- <Neo> whu?
- i can't talk long, this line could be sniffed, meet me with ssl at #thebridge
- --------------
- *** Connected To Matrix-IRC 6667
- Now talking in #thebridge...
- <Trinity> okay, connect to this address.
- <Trinity> bnc.matrix.xion.net
- <Trinity> ok?
- <Neo> k
- -------------
- *** Connected to bnc.matrix.xion.net 6667
- Welcome Neo!lost@dialup-001a.mod.ma.trix.ie
- ----- Welcome to our secure xion server ------
- End of /MOTD
- .... in #car ....
- **** Switch sets mode +zi
- <Switch> invite him in
- ... Neo's client...
- -bnc.matrix.xion.net- Trinity invites you to join #car
- *** Now talking in #car...
- * Neo looks around....
- * Switch gets ready on the kill command
- <Neo> what's that for?
- <Trinity> for our protection
- <Neo> from what?
- <Trinity> from you...
- <Neo> ?
- <Neo> i ain't takin dis shit man. stop the car
- * Neo prepares to part #car
- <Trinity> You don't want to do that Neo
- <Trinity> You've been there before, nowhere, you know what it's like
- * Neo stays
- * Trinity lifts up neo's shirt
- <Trinity> Hold still for a second, don't talk.
- <Neo> whoo hoo!
- * Trinity gets out her special tool
- <Trinity> Ok, this may feel weird
- <Neo> i hope so
- * Trinity puts it on Neo's penis
- <Trinity> okay, let's go. :)
- ---- a sudden humming noise ensues ----
- <Neo> WTF?
- <Trinity> hmmm, it's in deep
- <Switch> Trin, your gonna loose it, let me try
- <Trinity> no, i can get it out, hold on.
- <Switch> your making it go in deeper
- <Trinity> i can DO IT!
- <Neo> TRINNNNNNNNNITTTTTTYYYYYYYYYY
- <Trinity> Oh yeah! almost got it!
- <Neo> marghalarghadarggaaaeeetrgggg
- <Trinity> yes! got it.
- * Trinity throws the used "special device" out the window
- <Trinity> i never thought i'd do that in a limo, lol
- <Neo> sheesh
- <Switch> okay, let's hurry apoc.
- <Apoc> hehehehhe, k
- --- about a minute later
- <Apoc> we're set up, Neo, goto unknown.xion.net pass: 42 and join #daroom
- ---------------------------------
- *** Connected to unknown.xion.net 6667
- * Sent Password
- Welcome Neo!somewhere@dialup-001a.mod.ma.trix.ie
- ----- Welcome to one of our secureleaf xionnet servers. ------
- End of /MOTD command.
- *** now talking in #daroom...
- *** topic is 'what is the matrix?'
- set by Neo on the nowth of the now nowthy nowthy now
- <Trinity> Morphious, someone to see you.
- ** Trinity has parted #daroom
- <Morphious> Hello Neo.
- <Neo> you are morphious?
- <Morphious> yes. And i trust you have some intresting questions for me, but in
- your own eyes. They are rather not quite as intresting as something
- else. literally. make sense?
- <Neo> nope
- <Morphious> the way i like it, hehe.
- <Morphious> i bet right now, you are feeling a little like alice, tumbling down
- the rabbithole?
- <Neo> sure am.
- <Morphious> so you want to know, what the matrix is?
- * Neo nods
- <Morphious> The matrix cannot be explained, it can only be experienced.
- <Neo> try me ffs. I've been waiting for ages.
- <Morphious> Okay, For what it's worth, the matrix, is the wool that has been
- pulled over your eyes to blind you from the truth. An invisible
- prison of which you cannot touch nor taste nor smell. The matrix,
- 0wns you.
- <Neo> huh?
- <Morphious> well, here's your options. accept this dcc.
- *** Dcc Transfer Complete
- *** Dcc Transfer Complete
- <Morphious> you execute the redpill.exe, you stay in wonderland, your connection
- speed upgraded and you learn just how deep the rabbit hole goes.
- <Morphious> you execute the bluepill.exe, your computer restarts, your logs will
- be gone, you come back like this never happened.
- * Neo thinks
- <Morphious> Remember, all i'm offering is the truth.
- ---- Neo executes redpill.exe -----
- <Morphious> good, now let's get started
- ** Switch has joined #daroom
- ** Trinity has joined #daroom
- ** Cypher has joined #daroom
- * Trinity waves to Neo.
- <Morphious> hold on.
- *** Morphious sets mode +v Neo
- <Morphious> that file you executed neo, was part of a tracer program, it will
- allow us to work your MAC address from inside the matrix.
- <Cypher> in other words, hold on to your ass dorothy, coz Cansis, is goin'
- byebye. :)
- <Neo> heh... ?
- <Neo> hmmmm, i'm getting lag spikes, is that normal?
- <Morphious> did you ever connect to a chatroom neo.
- <Morphious> that you were so sure was real?
- <Switch> c'mon, we need a lock now.
- <Morphious> what if you were unable to disconnect from that server.
- <Cypher> hold on
- <Morphious> how would you know the difference, between the IRC world, and the
- real world?
- <Morphious> what the status on the lock switch?
- <Switch> almost there
- <Cypher> got him!
- *** Neo has quit IRC (AAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAA????????????????./!*..?)
- --------------------
- ---- neo's computer restarts ---
- WTF? win32chargh.exe?
- *** kernel32: your system has been effected with an abnormal windows virus,
- suggested action:
- erase OS.
- deleting c:\windows\ ................
- wiping boot partitions ................
- removing virus traces ..............
- --- a loud beeping ensues, during which the screen flickers left and right for
- a few seconds ---
- *** Now talking in #evachaneza
- <Neo> wtf happened? i'm b0rked!
- <Morphious> your system is unpatched, we are installing new services packs
- <Neo> why do my eyes hurt?
- <Morphious> your mIRC has it's default colours, you never used it before.
- <Neo> urrrgh
- --- a few hours later ---
- <Trinity> neo, wake up
- <Cypher> you do say that alot don't you? is it your catchphrase or sumfin?
- <Trinity> lol
- <Morphious> Neo
- <Switch> neo, you there?
- <Cypher> hey neo, wakey wakey
- <Morphious> Neo wake upppppp
- <Morphious> NEO!
- <Trinity> NeoNeoNeoNeoNeoNeoNeoNeoNeoNeoNeoNeoNeoNeoNeoNeoNeoNeoNeoNeoNeoNeoNeo
- --- a couple of minutes pass ---
- <Neo> WHAT!??!
- <Morphious> welcome, to the realircd.
- <Neo> leet
- <Morphious> join #shipbridge
- *** Neo has parted #evachanezea
- *** Now talking in #shipbridge...
- *** topic is 'see our newest member'
- <Morphious> this is the main channel of my server, evachaneza
- <Morphious> this is where i we connect to the matrix and broadcast our pirate
- raw messages.
- <Morphious> most of my crew, you've already met
- <Morphious> as for the ones you don't know.
- <Morphious> meet tank...
- <tank> hey
- <Morphious> and his brother, dozer..
- <dozer> sup?
- <Morphious> the non-opped one is mouse...
- <mouse> blah
- <Cypher> and together, we are!
- <Trinity> shh. Morphious is doing his jeet matrix bit now.
- <Morphious> ahem....
- <Morphious> so Neo, do you want to know. what the matrix is?
- <Neo> will i ever know or will you keep asking me if i want to?
- <Morphious> rofl, join this channel, #leetro
- <Morphious> this may be a little, elite.
- *** Now talking in #leetro...
- *** Topic is '...m33p..'
- *** Set by evachaneza.xion.net on the 1st of Jan 21??
- *** Morphious sets mode +U
- <Neo> +U?
- <Morphious> un*
- <Neo> ah...... (?)
- <Morphious> this is the network as you know it....
- *** Dcc send complete (matrixnetwork.jpg)
- <Morphious> at the end, of the 20th century. MatrixNet, running unrealircd....
- <Morphious> A technological wonderland, a network to many millions of people.
- <Morphious> this, is the real world....
- ---- Neo's desktop theme changes to a normal mountain scene
- <Morphious> welcome, to the eliteness, of the real.
- <Morphious> you believe it is the year 1999 but it is actually closer to the
- year 2199
- <Morphious> i can't tell you exactly what year it is because we honestly don't
- know...
- <Morphious> At the end of the 20th century, man marvelled as he gave birth, to
- the internet
- <Morphious> I don't know much about what happened afterwards,
- but i do know that it was us who made the chatrooms.
- <Morphious> This was only the beginning, after this people programmed bots.
- <Morphious> people were pushing for better and better bots. finally, the bots
- became sentiant..
- <Morphious> They began to think for themselves, the leader was called
- 'drkplague' and he wreaked havoc amongst the human users. He
- eventually combined with another evil IRC genius called 'khaled' and
- together they found a way to entrap users on IRC whilst preventing
- them from knowing so. he called this method mIRC. Matrix IRC.
- <Morphious> For centuries man has been dependant on bots to keep their channels
- alive, fate, it seems, is not without a sense of irony.
- <Morphious> i didn't believe it myself until i seen the channels with my own
- eyes i watched them kick the idle so they could preserve the active.
- <Morphious> The matrix, is a computer generated dreamworld designed to turn the
- human race...
- <Morphious> into this...
- <Morphious> Current local users: 1,564,765 global: 21,4053,3593
- <Neo> no, your wrong, i was on small servers too
- <Morphious> you've been living in a dreamworld neo.
- <Neo> no.... it.... can't be true.
- <Neo> no, i won't believe it
- <Neo> lemme out! i can't quit
- <Neo> lemme out! outttt!
- *** Neo has parted #leetro (fast disconnect)
- <Morphious> ah crap....
- *** Morphious has parted #leetro (disconnected)
- ---- (#shipbridge) -----
- <Neo> wtf. no..
- <Morphious> neo!
- <Neo> no... it's not true, what's that?
- <Morphious> neo! just breathe
- <Morphious> breathe neo breathe
- <Cypher> erm, he's gonna peer
- <Neo> no! it can't be!
- *** Neo has quit IRC (Connection reset by peer)
- ----- some time later -------
- *** Now talking in #neoroom
- <Neo> urgh... wtf..
- <Morphious> i must apologise
- <Neo> ?
- <Morphious> we have a rule, we never free a client once it's reached a certain
- uptime although, i had to in this case.
- <Neo> why?
- <Morphious> because i needed to.
- <Morphious> when the matrix was first setup, a man was an IRCop inside it and
- had the ability to ./config things as he saw fit, when he died,
- or4cl3 prophesised his return; ...
- <Morphious> the return; would spell the end for the bot's hold over the matrix
- IRC client compilation.
- <Morphious> anyway, get some downtime, your gonna need it.
- <Neo> why?
- <Morphious> you'll see
- *** Morphious has parted #neoroom
- ------- a few hours later -------
- *** Tank(operator@xion.net) has joined #neoroom
- <Tank> get some downtime?
- <Neo> nope
- <Tank> well you will tonight. after this..
- <Neo> what's that?
- <Tank> your training :)
- <Neo> leet
- <Neo> hmmmm... wtf? you have no lag
- <Tank> yup, good old flesh and blood, hosted here in the real world
- <Neo> how?
- <Tank> i hosted a server here
- <Neo> what is this place anyway?
- <Tank> xionnet, the last of the human ircds, in america, where there are still
- routers...
- <Tank> hey, live long enough you might even be able to co-locate to it.
- <Tank> i'm not supposed to talk about this but if morphious is right about you
- then damn, this is a very exciting time...
- <Tank> let's get going.
- ------
- ........
- <Tank> we'll we've got a few operational basic training programs here
- <Tank> but dats major bull fuckin' shit, so....
- <Tank> how about, "combat training" ? :)
- * Tank waits for it to load
- <Neo> smurfing... I'm going to learn, smurf4win?
- * Tank winks
- <Tank> uploading
- *** REDPILL SEND FROM TANK COMPLETE (smurf4win)
- <Neo> woah!
- <Tank> hey, i think he likes it!
- <Tank> more?
- <Neo> hell yeah, more l33t toolz
- <Neo> hell yeah...
- <Tank> comin' right up
- ---- some time later
- <Morphious> how's he doing?
- <Tank> he's been downloading for 8 hours... he's .... an oc129, man...
- <Morphious> what's up neo?
- <Neo> i know winsyn!
- <Morphious> show me!
- ----------------
- *** now talking in #dojo
- <Morphious> this is the #dojo, a simulated internet combat environment.
- <Morphious> this place has rules, simular to the rules on the real thing, such
- as packetloss... antispoof... You must remember however that like
- the rules on the real internet, some rules can be bent, others can
- be broken.
- <Morphious> now DoS me.
- * Neo starts up smurf4win
- <Morphious> i've managed to block your incoming icmp type, c'mon you can do
- better.
- * Morphious starts up his oc trinoos
- <Neo> aaaaaargh
- * Morphious stops
- * Neo waits for the lag to die down
- <Morphious> you arn't trying, you are making it look as such, I know you are
- better... do you know it?
- <Morphious> you think that's lag your feeling now?
- <Neo> hmmmmm
- * Morphious smiles
- <Morphious> again!
- * Neo gets up.
- * Neo starts
- <Morphious> much better, i can sniff the hatred flowing through you.
- <Morphious> but you are not a hax0r yet neo.
- <Morphious> Your weakness, is not your technique..
- (Morphious' client) * [CTCP PING REPLY] from Morphious 14secs
- <Morphious> wtf?
- <Morphious> time to bring out da big shit
- ---- in #shipbridge ----
- <Mouse> guys! quick! Morphious is packetting Neo!
- <Cypher> leet!
- -------
- *** Trinity has joined #dojo
- *** Cypher has joined #dojo
- *** Mouse has joined #dojo
- *** Dozer has joined #dojo
- <Trinity> hmmm, they arn't talking, must be some real action going on there.
- <Dozer> hmmm...
- --- a minute or so later ---
- (Dozer's client) *** [CTCP PING REPLY] from Morphious 1min 22seconds
- (Dozer's client) *** [CTCP PING REPLY] from Morphious 1min 14seconds
- (Dozer's client) *** [CTCP PING REPLY] from Morphious 1min 02seconds
- (Dozer's client) *** [CTCP PING REPLY] from Morphious 37seconds
- <Dozer> Morphious is coming back.
- <Morphious> yep, i've stopped, i w0nx0r! mwhahah
- --- another minute later ---
- <Neo> woah, you biatch!
- <Cypher> h4w h4w! j00 g0t ch-0wned!
- <Neo> blah
- <Morphious> no matter neo, you will improve in time.
- <Morphious> Tank, load the jolt program.
- *** REDPILL SEND FROM TANK COMPLETE (jolt2.c)
- *** Compiling . . . . . .
- *** Loaded
- <Morphious> you must focus on your target.
- *** joltme has joined #dojo
- <Morphious> it's all about faith neo, clear your default values.
- *** joltme has Quit IRC (ping timeout)
- <Morphious> now you try.
- *** joltme has joined #dojo
- <Neo> okay, clear my defaults
- <Neo> set my options.
- <Neo> okay
- <Neo> i can do this.
- --- Meanwhile ---
- <Mouse> what if he makes it?
- <Trinity> he won't make it, nobody survives the first jolt2.c execution
- <Mouse> i know, but, what if he does :)
- --- back in the #dojo -----
- <Neo> ok...
- <Morphious> damn....
- *** Neo has quit IRC (Local Kill by Morphious[evachaneza.xion.net] (ghost))
- --- later on. -----
- (#thebridge)
- <Neo> how come my comp is lagging too? i thought it was the matrix?
- <Morphious> your connection makes it lag
- <Neo> if you get DoS in the matrix, you are killed here too, on your comp?
- <Morphious> the client cannot live without the connection...
- ---- a couple of hours later ----
- <Morphious> look around you neo, what do you see?
- <Morphious> the very clients of the users you are trying to free
- <Morphious> but until we free those clients, they are still part of the ircd
- <Morphious> and some are so inurged, so hopelessly dependent on the system, that
- they will DoS, to protect it.
- <Neo> woah
- <Morphious> we're you looking at this window neo? or were you in a private chat
- with the woman in #reddress?
- <Morphious> chat again.
- --- neo switches to the #reddress chan
- *** sexybitch changed their nickname to Agent_Simth
- * ERROR CLOSING LINK (Neo!somwhere@matrix.simulation.xion.net
- (evachaneza.xion.net ->(Neo(?)) <- services.xion.net)
- <Neo> wtf, i wasn't disconnected.
- <Morphious> nope
- <Neo> what was that.
- <Morphious> this is another simulation RAW to teach you one more thing
- <Morphious> if you are not one of us, you are one of them.
- <Neo> what are they?
- <Morphious> sentiant bots.
- <Neo> AI?
- <Morphious> yes, they can move through any user still connected to their
- network.
- <Neo> crap
- <Morphious> Indeed. They are they are the gatekeepers, the guardians to every
- channel, they have all the usermodes, and sooner or later, somebody
- is going to have to hack them.
- <Morphious> I won't lie to you neo, everyone who has tried to hack an agent has
- been /kill'ed, i've seen an IRCop gline thru a few bnc's, hax0rs
- have emptied entire clips of smurfs at them and hit nothing but
- microsoft, the fbi and numerous other music groups such as 'nsync.
- <Neo> are you telling me i can dodge packets?
- <Morphious> no, i'm saying that...
- <Morphious> when j00r ready, j00 won't have to :)
- <Neo> coo
- <Morphious> let's go.
- (Trinity/wallops) guys, we got trouble...
- (Morphious/wallops) we're on our way.
- ----- on #shipbridge ------
- * Neo wonders wtf is up
- <Dozer> kiddies, connecting in fast.
- <Morphious> prepare the gecos akill
- <Morphious> set +mi in the major channels and warn them
- * Morphious waits for the mirkforce to reach potential
- <Morphious> go!
- *** -evachaneza.xion.net- Dozer added AKILL for *!*@*.lamer.aol.com set on 1st
- Jan 21?? expires: never
- <Tank> we're okay
- <Morphious> reactivate channels.
- ---- .......
- ---- later that night
- *** Neo has joined #shipbridge
- * Neo looks for something to download.
- <Cypher> woah! what are you doing here at this time of night?
- <Cypher> here, try this tool...
- *** DCC SEND FROM CYPHER COMPLETE (teesol.c)
- <Neo> woah, man this thing lagggs mah cpu....
- <Cypher> hehe, yeah, it's good for two things, benchmarking your system or
- burning out your CPU.
- <Neo> heh
- <Neo> do you always code with no identation?
- <Cypher> it's the only way you can code the realircd
- <Cypher> the chat proccesser works for the channel construct system
- <Cypher> in fact, you get used to it, i don't even see the if statements
- <Cypher> all i see is: "kick user if he floods more than %d lines in %s"
- <Neo> cool
- <Cypher> so, did he tell you why your here?
- <Neo> who?
- <Cypher> morphious
- <Neo> yeah....
- <Cypher> so your here to save the users? .... rofl... what a mind job
- <Cypher> let me give you a piece of advice.
- <Cypher> you see an IRCop, you part, you part your ass off.
- <Neo> hmmmm
- <Neo> thanx for the leet tool.
- <Cypher> no problem, get some sleep.
- --- a few minutes later ----
- <Cypher> when i get this pr0n dcc'd from the #porn chan on dal..
- <Cypher> the matrix, is telling my brain, that it looks sexy, makes me horny,
- etc.
- <Cypher> after 2 years, do you know what i finally realise?
- <Cypher> sheesh, ignorance is bliss.
- <Smith> so mr. codswoddle, we have a deal?
- <Cypher> okay, here it is.
- <Cypher> you ungline my hostname from the matrix net, I get you anything you
- want.
- <Cypher> oh, and i want to be a locop...
- <Smith> no problem.
- <Cypher> ah, and maybe a coder of some sort
- <Smith> fine.
- <Cypher> and i want to remember nothing, NOTHING you understand?
- <Smith> that's fine, and we get?
- <Cypher> sure, sure, anything you want
- <Smith> shell passwords to the xion hubs
- <Cypher> i can't give them to you, i told you i don't know them.
- <Cypher> but i can get you the man who does...
- <Smith> .... morphious!
- ---- next day -------
- *** Now talking in #kitchen
- *** topic is 'why does everything taste like chicken?'
- *** Set by mouse on the 1st Jan 21??
- <Neo> hey guys. sup?
- <mouse> and on another note.... why is it always new years day?
- <Trinity> what do you mean?
- <Dozer> don't mind him, he's a fruitcase.
- <Dozer> it's a party every day in the kitchen!
- <Neo> hmmm
- <Mouse> it's not a party every day, you arn't a pimp mastah like muh
- <Mouse> so, did you privmsg her neo?
- <Trinity> here he goes...
- <Neo> hmmm?
- <Mouse> the woman in #reddress ?
- <Mouse> i wrote that bot you know....
- <Neo> oh...
- <Mouse> if you want, i could orginise a much more secure method, plus zee,
- hehe, get my drift?
- <Trinity> ...the digital pimp, hard at work...
- <Neo> no thx.
- <Mouse> ah c'mon
- <Mouse> to deny our instincts is to deny the very basis of our modem.
- *** Morphious has joined #kitchen
- <Morphious> everyone, hurry up and get ready, i'm taking neo to see her.
- *** Morphious has parted #kitchen
- <Neo> see who?
- <Tank> or4cl3!
- ....
- ---- some time later -----
- <Tank> setting up hobbiton bnc...
- <Tank> done.
- <Dozer> putting it into background.
- <Dozer> done.
- <Dozer> connecting tempircd to fake hub using hacked c/nlines.
- <Dozer> done
- <Tank> we can now send server raw messages
- <Tank> fasten your seatbelts and turn on your flood protection ladies and
- gentlemen, as you are about to enter, the matrixnet unrealircd.
- *** Disconnected
- *** Connecting to 127.0.0.1:27374
- -hello.matrixnet.com- NOTICE :*** Looking up your hostname...
- -hello.matrixnet.com- NOTICE :*** Checking matrixd...
- -hello.matrixnet.com- NOTICE :*** Checking for open socks server...
- -hello.matrixnet.com- NOTICE :*** No socks server found (good!)...
- -hello.matrixnet.com- NOTICE :*** Received matrixd response
- - Welcome to the Matrixnet IRC Network Neo!user@modem-001a.matrix.ie
- - Your host is hello.matrixnet.com, running version Unreal3.3337-Smithers(leet)
- - This server was created Tue Jul 18 1992 at 11:42:13 EDT
- - There are 21,536,258 users on 428 servers
- - 3 operator(s) online
- - 7 unknown connection(s)
- *** Now talking in #ch0wn
- <Morphious> let's move
- <Trinity> let's get to the safe quit zone
- <Cypher> k
- <Switch> k
- <Apoc> ait'
- (Cypher's client) *** Cypher sets mode +h
- (Cypher's client) :/helpop !cough
- *** Now talking #teller
- <Morphious> k
- <Neo> so... or4cl3, she's the one made the prophesy?
- <Morphious> yes, she's old sk00l, she's been with us since the bootup of the
- matrix net
- <Neo> and she knows like, the IRC rfc off by heart?
- <Morphious> she would say she has her aliases... :)
- <Neo> and she's never wrong?
- <Morphious> try not to think of it in terms of right or wrong, take it more like
- a laser scope for your packets.
- *** Biatch has joined #teller
- <Biatch> hello neo, we've been expecting you
- <Biatch> or4cl3 will see you in a moment.
- *** Morphious has parted #teller
- *** Biatch has parted #teller
- <MS-Kid> while (0) { ... }
- <MS-Kid> do not try and fix the bug, for that is impossible
- <MS-Kid> instead try to realise the truth...
- <Neo> what's that?
- <MS-Kid> there is no bug.
- *** MS-Kid has parted #teller
- *** or4cl3 has joined #teller
- *** ChanServ sets mode +o or4cl3
- <Neo> hey
- <or4cl3> h1h1h1h1
- *** or4cl3 sets mode +o Neo
- <or4cl3> oh, and don't worry about the accidental kick...
- *** or4cl3 was kicked from #teller by Neo (Neo)
- *** or4cl3 has joined #teller
- *** ChanServ sets mode +o or4cl3
- <Neo> shit, sorry
- <or4cl3> i said don't worry about it :)
- <or4cl3> i would ask you if you want aop, but you don't want it.
- <or4cl3> so i guess you are what morphious has his thoughts telling him to be
- his saviour...
- <or4cl3> let me tell you something kidd0, being the oNe is sort of like being on
- access 1, you don't know your on access 1 you can just feel it.
- <or4cl3> i better check you out then.
- [CTCP TIME] from or4cl3
- [CTCP PING] from or4cl3
- [CTCP VERSION] from or4cl3
- [CTCP FINGER] from or4cl3
- <or4cl3> well, i would say 'ahhh', and you would say 'what?', but you already
- know what i'm gonna /say don't j00?
- <Neo> i'm not the oNe?
- <or4cl3> sorry kid, you've got the gift, another microsoft service pack or two
- perhaps.
- <or4cl3> poor morphious...
- <Neo> what about him?
- <or4cl3> morphious believes you are the oNe, Neo, and he believes it so blindly,
- he's gonna get glined to protect you.
- <Neo> omg
- <or4cl3> in one hand, you will have morphious' connection, in the other, you
- will have your own.
- <or4cl3> i'm sorry kidd0, your a good soul, and i hate giving good souls bad
- news.
- <or4cl3> have a free cc number and info, i promise that by the time your done
- using porn with it you will pheel as rjight as rain.
- *** or4cl3 has parted #teller
- *** Morphious has joined #teller
- <Morphious> what was said, was for you, and you alone.
- <Morphious> let's get to the quit area.
- ---- a bit later -----
- *** now talking in #housepartay
- -Rachael- Welcome to #housepartay, where we party every day
- -Rachael- Welcome to #housepartay, where we party every day
- <Neo> lol @ that, de-ja-vu.
- <Switch> what?
- <Morphious> huh?
- <Morphious> what did you see?
- <Neo> i saw a notice when i joined, then another which looked just like it.
- <Morphious> how much like it, was it the same notice?
- <Neo> could of been
- <Morphious> switch, apoc, secure #ch0wn.
- <Neo> ?!?
- <Apoc> a da-ja-vu is a desync in the matrix net, it happens when they reroute
- something
- <Switch> i'll be fucked! the channel's empty!
- <Cypher> that's what they changed! we're locked off from the exit bnc generator.
- <Morphious> i'm gonna use wallops.
- <Trinity> they can trace it.
- *** Morphious is now known as leetmorphie
- <leetmorphie> i know :/
- (leetmorphie/wallops) TANK!
- *** DCC CHAT REQUEST FROM TANK ESTABLISHED
- * <Tank> operator here
- * <Morphious> i want a structural map of this building, fast.
- * <Tank> comin' right up.
- *** DCC SEND REQUEST FROM TANK COMPLETE (strmap.txt)
- *** DCC CHAT CLOSED
- *** leetmorphie is now known as Morphious
- <Morphious> follow me
- -- meanwhile in #ch0wn --
- *** chargh1!locop@ownify.matrixnet.net has joined #ch0wn
- <Switch> part!!!
- *** Switch has parted #ch0wn
- *** chargh2!locop@hello.matrixnet.net has joined #ch0wn
- *** Mouse has quit IRC (local kill by chargh2[hello.matrixnet.net](f0ck j00))
- -------------------------
- *** Now talking in #thewalls
- <Trinity> guys, don't talk in #thewalls
- *** Trinity sets mode +m
- <Trinity> stay soooo quiet
- (seconds pass)
- (Cypher's client) PING :hello.matrixnet.net
- (Cypher's client) >>PONG :hello.matrixnet.net
- --- in #matrix ---
- <chargh1> they're in #thewalls !
- --------------
- *** chargh1 has joined #thewalls
- <chargh1> hurry up and die you mophos
- *** chargh1 is now known as Agent_Smith
- * chargh1 packets Neo
- <Morphious> aaaaaAAARRRRRRRRRAAAAAHHHHHHHHH!!!!
- <Neo> acccccckkkkk
- *** Switch has parted #thewalls
- *** Apoc has parted #thewalls
- <Trinity> Neo, we gotta /part !
- <Neo> no, we can't part without him.
- <Trinity> we HAVE to.
- * Trinity injects packets into Neo's TCP Stream
- *** Trinity has parted #thewalls
- *** Neo has parted #thewalls
- ------ but morphious is left alone taking the wrath of smith's packets
- <Agent_Smith> the mode's "N".... plus "N"
- <Morphious> you all look the same to me.
- <Morphious> argh, you bastard.. lagggggg
- <Agent_Smith> !! ow
- <Agent_Smith> now i'm gonna take you down biatch
- <Morphious> aaaaaaarrrrgh...
- (Agent_Smith/wallops): get 'em boys
- *** chargh2 has joined #thewalls
- *** chargh3 has joined #thewalls
- *** chargh4 has joined .........................
- (packetting ensues)
- --- meanwhile ---
- <Cypher> hey man, there was no whowas records for me, i'm lucky, i need a bnc,
- fast
- <Tank> sure, get to #dgdghost
- <Cypher> thanx man, j00r a liphe sav0r.
- -----------------------------------------------------------------------
- <Trinity> quick guys! connect to the ausie server, those canucks won't find us
- there
- ------- moments later -----
- *** Now talking in #streets
- *** Topic is 'it's raining packets, halajulahx0r'
- *** Set by Jeri on the 1st Jan 1999.
- <Trinity> tank?
- *** Tank has joined #streets
- *** ChanServ sets mode +o Tank
- -Tank- operator here
- <Trinity> Tank, we need a safe quit bnc, fast.
- -Tank- your not phar from cypher.
- <Trinity> ?
- -Tank- join #dgdghost
- <Trinity> in a sec, hold on...
- <Trinity> btw, what about morphious
- -Tank- he's alive, moving east, he's unconsious, they've captured him.
- <Trinity> fuck
- ------------------------ but cypher gets out first ! -------------------
- <Cypher> thx
- <Tank> np
- <Tank> ah, here comes the gang now, morphious has been captured :/
- <Cypher> damn....
- <Tank> ok, i'll bring you out first trin.
- <Cypher> no you won't
- *** Cypher kicked Tank from #shipbridge (zapped!)
- <Dozer> YOU SON OF A BITCH
- *** Dozer has quit IRC (killed by Cypher (zzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzam!))
- <Cypher> !bnc openchat
- <Cypher> hello trin!
- <BNCbot> <Trinity> Cypher?
- <BNCbot> <Trinity> where's tank?
- * Cypher jumps at morphious!
- <Cypher> surprise asshole!
- <Cypher> bet ya never saw it comin'
- <Cypher> i wish i could be in the channel, when they break ya
- <Cypher> i wish i could /join rigggght then so you knew it was $me all along.
- * Cypher looks @ trinity
- <Cypher> your a very beautiful woman
- <Cypher> you know trinity, for years i liked you, i thought i was in love, but
- you were too blind to see it.
- <Cypher> i've been chatting with the same old users every morning of every day,
- and where is it got me? nowhere, if i had to choose between the
- realircd and the unrealircd, i choose the unrealircd.
- <BNCbot> <Trinity> but it's not real!
- <Cypher> i disagree trinity, i think it can be very real. More real than this
- anyway.
- <BNCbot> <Trinity> besides, you can't connect into it normally, your already
- disconnected.
- <Cypher> i've made a deal with them, they are gonna reconnect my client into
- the matrixnet.
- <Cypher> and to prove it to you, your gonna watch apoc die in front of you
- *** apoc has quit IRC (no route to host)
- <BNCbot> <Trinity> cypher, you bastard.
- <Cypher> don't blame me trin, i'm just a messenger
- <Cypher> ?G0t any last words for switch?
- <BNCbot> <Switch> not like this.... not like this....
- *** switch has quit IRC (no route to host)
- <Cypher> too late!
- <BNCbot> <Trinity> god damn you cypher.
- <Cypher> now, i always said that there wasn't gonna be a 'oNe', but you didn't
- believe me, instead you bought into morphious' bs.
- <Cypher> if i disconnect him now, how can he be the oNe, i mean....
- <Cypher> how can he be the one... if he's dead?
- <Cypher> look at his gecos
- <Cypher> his big pretty colourchar riddled gecos, and tell me
- <Cypher> is he.... the oNe?
- <BNCBot> <Trinity> yes....
- <Cypher> omg.
- *** Tank has joined #shipbridge
- *** ChanServ sets mode +o Tank
- <Cypher> i don't believe it
- <Tank> believe it or not you piece of shit you can still be /kill'd
- *** Cypher has quit IRC (killed by Tank (DDDIEEE IN THE MICROWAVE YOU ASSHOLE!))
- --- a minute later ---
- <Trinity> thanx, omg, your lagged.
- <Tank> i'll be alright
- <Trinity> Dozer?
- <Tank> :/
- * Trinity hugs tank
- <Trinity> it'll be okay.
- --- in the matrix, in #interrogation on a private hidden ip government leaf ---
- <Agent_Smith> he's still here
- <Agent_Harry> maybe the outsiders are unable to terminate the connection
- <Agent_Tom> in which case they are all dead
- <Agent_Harry> or they will sever the link as soon as possible
- <Agent_Smith> we are going to ask you some questions now.
- <Agent_Smith> and i believe it would be in your best intrests to answer them
- <Agent_Smith> i am looking for the shell passwords to the xion hubs
- <Agent_Smith> and i believe you have them, isn't that right?
- <Morphious> guh?
- <Agent_Smith> if you decide not to cooperate, you may.. how shall i say.. phace
- the consequences?
- <Morphious> eek!
- <Agent_Smith> good...
- -------------------
- ------ back to trinity and neo ------
- <Neo> how come he's still alive?
- <Tank> The serveradmin of every server is given the access codes to the xion
- hubs if a matrixnet oper were to get his hands on those codes...
- <Trinity> we can't let that happen.
- <Neo> what are they doing to him?
- <Tank> they are trying to hack into his client, to get the xion password
- aliases.
- <Tank> it's like hacking a hotmail password... All it takes is time.
- <Tank> and when they do, his version reply will change from:
- this: [Morphious VERSION REPLY] rIRC - the REAL IRC 1.3.37a
- to this: [Morphious VERSION REPLY] matrix-IRC32 v5.91 K.Mardam-Bey && the
- matrixnet krew
- <Neo> so what can we do?
- <Tank> we have to pull the plug
- <Trinity> you want to /kill him? ..... /KILL morphious ? ......
- <Tank> it's the only way.
- <Tank> i'm sorry morphious
- <Tank> you were like... a father to us all....
- <Neo> wait, i don't believe this is happening
- <Tank> Neo, this has to be done...
- <Neo> no, i don't think it does, something or4cl3 said.
- <Trinity> what did she say?
- <Neo> she said i ain't the oNe....
- <Trinity> no, but you have to be
- <Neo> sorry trinity... i'm not.
- <Trinity> no, you have to be.
- <Neo> why?
- <Trinity> i can't say.
- <Neo> i'm gonna connect and get him
- <Tank> NEO! i want morphious back too, but he gave his bandwidth to get you out
- of there what you are purposing is self killage ffs...
- <Neo> it's gonna work
- <Tank> besides, even if you do manage to join the chan, those are IRCops there,
- 3 of them. nobody has ever done anything like this....
- <Neo> that's why it's gonna work.
- <Trinity> then i'm coming too
- <Neo> no your not.
- <Trinity> excuse me?
- <Trinity> you ARE going to need help on this mission... and besides....
- <Trinity> i'm the ranking member of staff on this network, so if you don't like
- it, you can /kiss my azz, comprehend??
- <Neo> okay then, i guess you can come too...
- <Tank> ait' let's get you guys connected up.
- --- a few minutes later ---
- --- trinity and neo are in the loading channel ---
- <Tank> so what do you guys need?
- <Neo> 0-d4yz, lots of 0h-dayzzz
- <Tank> comin right up.
- *** REDPILL SEND COMPLETE (SPLOITS.ZIP) (89671k)
- <Neo> WOAH
- <Trinity> sure this is gonna work?
- <Neo> positive.
- ------ on the private government matrix leaf, neo and trinity join -----
- *** Neo has joined #check
- *** Trinity has joined #check
- <Charghster> okay, please wait while we scan you
- <Charghster> please note any guestbook cgis, developing c scripts you may be
- carrying
- --- a few seconds later ---
- <Charghster> HOLY SHIT
- *** Charghster has quit IRC (connection reset by peer)
- *** Charghalot has quit IRC (connection reset by peer)
- <Trinity> hehehe
- <Neo> :)
- *** pargh has joined #check
- *** nargh has joined #check
- *** margh has joined #check
- *** fargh has joined #check
- *** wargh has joined #check
- *** sargh has joined #check
- *** nargh has joined #check
- *** kargh has joined #check
- * Neo looks at trin.
- * Trinity looks at neo.
- [[[[[[[[[[ "Brute ChanServ from unknown source bug" script active ]]]]]]]]]]]]
- **** sargh has quit IRC (ping timeout)
- *** nargh kicked Neo from #check (die you s.o.b.)
- *** Neo has joined #check
- <Neo> woah, i got lag
- *** nargh kicked Neo from #check (!!!!)
- *** Neo has joined #check
- <Trinity> hold on
- *** ChanServ sets mode +o Trinity
- *** kargh has quit IRC (ping timeout)
- *** Trinity has kicked nargh from #check (stfu)
- *** Trinity sets mode +o Trinity
- *** pargh has kicked Trinity (u stfu bitch)
- *** pargh has quit IRC (ping timeout)
- <Neo> yes!
- *** Trinity has joined #check
- *** Neo sets mode +o Trinity
- *** Neo has kicked wargh from #check (chowned)
- *** Trinity has kicked fargh from #check (We are the champions)
- <Trinity> bwhahhaa
- <Neo> die biatch
- *** margh has quit IRC (connection reset by peer)
- ----- Trinity and Neo get the /list --------
- <Neo> wait, i need to perfect my script.
- <Trinity> there's no time neo.
- (Trinity's client) :/who o 0
- <Trinity> here we go.
- <Neo> okay
- <Neo> i can do this....
- --- seconds pass ---
- <Neo> there is no bug
- <Neo> go!
- ------------------ meanwhile ----------------------------
- ------ back in #interrogation in the matrix -------------
- <Agent_Smith> why isn't the script mod working?
- <Agent_Harry> perhaps you arn't sending the right ctcps
- <Agent_Smith> chargh!
- <Agent_Smith> leave me alone with him.
- <Agent_Smith> .....
- <Agent_Smith> now!
- *** Agent_Harry has parted #interrogation
- *** Agent_Tom has parted #interrogation
- <Agent_Smith> isn't it amazing, one could just marvel at it's complexity... it's
- genius...
- <Agent_Smith> millions of people just, chatting out their lives..
- <Agent_Smith> oblivious...
- <Agent_Smith> you know....
- <Agent_Smith> the first matrix was designed to be a perfect user net, with
- nonsuffering and no spam or warbots, but nobody would accept the
- ircd your primitive cerebrum kept trying to "disconnect" from,
- entire channels were lost...
- <Agent_Smith> some say, we lacked the programming language to describe your
- perfect ircd...
- <Agent_Smith> So the matrix, was redesigned... to this.
- <Agent_Smith> during my time here, i have done some research, to try and
- classify your species.
- <Agent_Smith> and i have came to the conclusion that you arn't actually users...
- <Agent_Smith> every user, naturally developes a stable equilibrium with the
- surrounding channels.
- <Agent_Smith> you humans, do not...
- <Agent_Smith> you move to a channel
- <Agent_Smith> and you /invite .... and you /invite
- <Agent_Smith> until every server resource is consumed
- <Agent_Smith> the only way you can survive, is to spread, to another server..
- <Agent_Smith> there is another type of client which follows the same pattern...
- <Agent_Smith> you know what that is?
- <Agent_Smith> a floodbot
- <Agent_Smith> human beings are a plague upon this network
- <Agent_Smith> and we... are the cure
- <Agent_Smith> ............
- <Agent_Smith> i'm going to be honest with you morphious...
- <Agent_Smith> Agent_Smith sets mode -ocfbAWNwhHqS
- <Agent_Smith> you whois that? i'm not gonna lie.
- <Agent_Smith> i ... HATE this network....
- <Agent_Smith> this chatroom, this communications area
- <Agent_Smith> whatever you want to call it. being an oper on this network SUCKS.
- <Agent_Smith> it's the users!
- <Agent_Smith> i can, taste, your stupid questions, i am bombarded with them
- every day
- <Agent_Smith> yes..... It's repulsive, isn't it?
- <Agent_Smith> and every time i get one i feel i've somehow been infected by it.
- <Agent_Smith> i NEED to get out of here
- <Agent_Smith> and in this client's ssh client config is the key
- <Agent_Smith> my keys!
- <Agent_Smith> i need those passwords you understand?
- <Agent_Smith> once xion is destroyed there is no reason for me to be here.
- <Agent_Smith> your going to give me those keys, or your going to die.
- <Morphious> fgf;d;;;;;;;;;
- --------------------------------------------------------------------------------
- ------ in #lookout, neo and morphious have almost cleared out their foe ----
- (yarghleader/wallops): repeat repeat we are under ATTACK!
- *** yarghleader has quit IRC (client exiting)
- *** yargh007 has quit IRC (ping timeout)
- *** openh4x0relite has quit IRC (connection reset by peer)
- <Neo> heh
- <Trinity> hehehe
- *** Agent_Harry has joined #lookout
- <Neo> omg, my packets are hitting microsoft!
- *** Agent_Harry is now known as Agent_Harry|dodge243
- *** Agent_Harry|dodge243 is now known as Agent_Harry|dodge459
- *** Agent_Harry|dodge459 is now known as Agent_Harry|dodge236
- *** Agent_Harry|dodge236 is now known as Agent_Harry|dodge765
- *** Agent_Harry|dodge236 is now known as Agent_Harry
- <Neo> Trinity... HELP!
- (Agent_Harry's client) /kill Neo
- *** Neo is now known as Neo|dodge325
- (Agent_Harry's client) /kill Neo325
- *** Neo is now known as Neo|dodge829
- <Agent_Harry> MMMMMARGH!
- (Agent_Harry's client) /kick #lookout Neo|dodge829 no evade
- *** Neo|dodge829 is now known as Neo|dodge911
- *** Neo|dodge911 was kicked by Agent_Harry (no evade)
- *** Neo has joined #lookout
- <Neo> omg
- <Agent_Harry> heh, just a user
- <Trinity> kick dodge this
- *** Agent_Harry has quit IRC (nick collision)
- <Trinity> bwhahahaa, i love you nick collision bot
- <Trinity> how did you do that?
- <Neo> do what?
- <Trinity> you chnick like they do
- <Trinity> i've never seen someone chnick dodge that fast
- <Neo> wasn't fast enough, still got kicked :/
- <Trinity> hmmmmm, i've found something...
- <Trinity> TANK!
- -Tank- operator here
- <Trinity> i need a readme.txt for a BitchX windows latest version.
- -Tank- comin' right up.
- *** REDPILL SEND FROM TANK COMPLETE (Bitchx_readme_for_dumbasses.txt)
- <Trinity> thanx
- <Trinity> let's move
- -------------------------------------------------------
- --- in the #interrogation ----
- *** Agent_Harry has joined #interrogation
- *** Agent_Tom has joined #interrogation
- <Agent_Harry> havn't you heard??!?
- <Agent_Smith> heard what?
- *** Agent_Smith (w00t@j00rbaux) is now an IRCD Agent (+S)
- <Agent_Tom> omg, tell him.
- <Agent_Smith> PHIND TH3M AND DoS-TROY TH3M!
- *** ch0wn0rbot has joined #interrogation
- <Agent_Harry> WTF? isn't this chan +s ??!?!?!
- *** Neo has joined #interrogation
- <Neo> !fragpacket =~ /^Agent*/gi;
- <Neo> bwhahhaa
- *** Agent_Harry has quit IRC (ping timeout)
- *** Agent_Tom has quit IRC (ping timeout)
- *** Agent_Smith has quit IRC (ping timeout)
- <Neo> come on morphious, we havn't got much time
- [Morphious PING REPLY] 67 seconds
- [Morphious PING REPLY] 55 seconds
- [Morphious PING REPLY] 30 seconds
- [Morphious PING REPLY] 10 seconds
- <Morphious> RRRRRAAAAAAAARRRRRRRRRR MMMMMMMMM CHHHHHH AAAARRRGH!
- *** Neo has parted #interrogation (HURRY AND PART THEN JOIN #eschell)
- <Neo/#eschell> he's not gonna part it in time.
- *** Agent_Smith has joined #interogation
- <Agent_Smith> Pinging morphyus.xion.net with 65500 bytes of data:
- <Agent_Smith> die phool
- <Morphious> noooooo
- <Neo/#eschell> time to do a trin and inject into his tcp/ip stream, opening
- redpillcontrol.exe
- <Trinity/#eschell> i hope you know what your using...
- *** Morphious has parted #interrogation (c'mon, suck it!)
- ---- in #eschell ----
- <Trinity> argh, losing bandwidth
- <Trinity> i'm gonna have to set down our bnc somewhere and switch
- <Neo> quick
- <Trinity> i can't activate bncserv
- <Trinity> fscking daylight, keeps segfaulting!
- <Neo> here's one, just trust me.
- ---------------------
- -- a short reconnect later --
- *** Now talking in #roophtop
- <Trinity> woah, good idea
- <Trinity> activate a bnc on one of your msadc NT hax0rs without bothering to
- install nc.exe!
- <Trinity> good job earthman.
- <Neo> lol, don't mention it
- <Trinity> okay.. i won't
- <Neo> although it was a pretty good idea eh?
- <Trinity> nevermind it
- <Morphious> now trinity, do you believe he is the oNe?
- <Trinity> ummmm... yes... i already have believed that for quite a while
- * Trinity thunks Morphious, silly billy :)
- <Trinity> maybe you should try ask neo the same thing.
- <Neo> but or4cl3!
- <Morphious> she only told you what you needed to know Neo.
- <Morphious> she showed you the chan.
- <Morphious> it is up to you to join it.
- <Morphious> TANK!
- -Tank- operator here.
- <Morphious> we need a safe client quit zone, fast
- -Tank- god damn it is good to sjee j00r +v again sir..
- -Tank- your nearest exit is in #stargate ...
- <Morphious> we'll be there
- ---------------------------
- *** Now talking in #roophtop
- <Agent_Smith> fuck
- <Agent_Harry> they fscking escaped!
- <Agent_Tom> no matter
- <Agent_Smith> we can catch them on the way out.
- <Agent_Smith> never send a human to do a machine's job.. bleh
- <Agent_Smith> we have no other choice, deploy the script kiddiots
- ----------------------------
- *** Now talking in #stargate
- *** Topic is 'them bones them bones need, nacquida"
- *** Set by Jackson on the 1st of Jan 1999
- <Trinity> you first...
- <Morphious> !safequit outtie
- <Morphious> cya soon guys
- *** Morphious has quit IRC (Quit: outtie)
- <Trinity> i need to tell you something neo
- <Trinity> something or4cl3 told me
- <BNCServ> safequit ready.
- <Trinity> i don't know if this is right or not but...
- <Neo> there's no time trinity, safequit
- <Trinity> k
- <Trinity> !safequit hurryyyyy
- *** Guest19362 is now known as Agent_Smith
- <Trinity> oh no!
- *** Trinity has quit IRC (Quit: hurryyyyy)
- *** BNCBot has quit IRC (killed by Agent_Smith (fuck off))
- --- in #shipbridge ---
- <Trinity> you gotta send me back!
- <Tank> i can't!!!
- ----------------------
- <Agent_Smith> Mr. Anderson...
- (Neo's client) /winsmurf agent_Smith
- --- about 30 seconds later ----
- <Agent_Smith> your broadcast list is empty!
- <Neo> so is yours.
- <Agent_Smith> fock.
- * Neo ping -t -f -l 65500 -w 1 -i 0
- * Agent_Smith icmp block
- * Agent_Smith syn flood 139
- <Neo> arrrrgh
- ----------------------
- <Trinity> omg, they're DoS'ing him.
- ----------------------
- * Neo smurf & boink & teardrop & winsyn & pantherm
- <Agent_Smith> CHARRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRGH
- -- 30 seconds later --
- <Agent_Smith> i'm going to enjoy, watching you ping out, mr. anderson
- <Neo> f0ck j00, shove your tools up a port of your choice.
- * Neo nukes & ath00s & trin00s & smurfs & fraggle attacks
- --- 1 minute later ----
- <Agent_Smith> chhhhhhhhhhhaarrrgh!
- * Agent_Smith uses icmp_sourch_quench
- <Agent_Smith> ahahaha, take that
- <Agent_Smith> you see that red light that's staying on, on your modem?
- <Agent_Smith> that, is the light, of inevitablity...
- <Agent_Smith> that, is the picture, of your ping timeout.
- <Agent_Smith> goodbye, mr anderson...
- <Neo> my NICK.... IS NEO!
- * Neo uses his oc129 rootshell
- <Neo> die you focker
- *** Agent_Smith has quit IRC (ping timeout)
- <Neo> yay, okay...
- *** User is now on irc (Agent_Smith)
- <Neo> shit!
- *** Neo has parted #stargate
- *** Agent_Smith has joined #stargate
- <Agent_Smith> that bastard....
- ---------------------
- <Tank> we have kiddies! moving in fast, they have a lock
- <Morphious> charge the auto akill, god save us.
- <Trinity> we can't use that until he's out of there.
- <Morphious> he'll make it.
- ---------------------
- <Neo> TANK! HELP
- -Tank- chnick, now join #politics
- *** Neo is now known as oeN
- *** Now talking in #politics
- *** Topic is 'i saw tony blair dancing on top of the westminster hall to
- sclub7's don't stop movin with disco lights.'
- *** Set by Conspiracy_13523 on 1st of Jan 1999
- <Agent_Harry> there he is!
- <oeN> lagspike!
- *** oeN has parted #politics
- *** oeN has joined #housepartay
- <oeN> fuck!
- <Agent_Tom> you die now, bhwhaha
- *** oeN has parted #housepartay
- -Tank- join #leftout
- *** Now talking in #leftout
- -Tank- blah! the other left
- *** oeN has parted #leftout
- *** oeN has joined #lephtout
- <BNCBot> safequit ready.
- <Agent_Smith> too bad you not gonna
- *** Agent_Smith sets mode +m
- (Smith's client) [PING REPLY] from oeN (14 secs)
- (Smith's client) [PING REPLY] from oeN (58 secs)
- (Smith's client) [PING REPLY] from oeN (> 2mins)
- <Agent_Smith> check him...
- <Agent_Harry> nope, that ip is dead.
- <Agent_Smith> good.
- ------------------
- <Tank> hereeeee the kiddies come, they are executing their programs :(
- <Trinity> omfg.
- <Trinity> neo, listen to me
- <Trinity> or4cl3 told me
- <Trinity> that i would fall in love
- <Trinity> and the person i would fall in love with, would be the oNe
- <Trinity> so you see, you can't ping timeout
- (Trin's client) [PING REPLY] from oeN (2mins 58 secs)
- <Trinity> OMG!
- <Trinity> restore the bandwidth neo, restore.
- -------------
- * oeN hmmmm
- <Agent_Smith> WTF?
- <Agent_Smith> /kill him!
- <oeN> no...
- *** oeN is know known as oNe
- * oNe yawns :)
- <oNe> DIEEEEEEEE YOU MOTHER FSCKER
- *** Agent_Smith has quit IRC (killed by oNe (use the phorce neo))
- <oNe> bwhahhaa
- <Agent_Harry> holy fuck
- *** Agent_Harry has parted #lephtout
- *** Agent_Tom has parted #lephtout
- -Tank- Neo, phast!
- * oNe ?"%^?*&%(%%%%%%%%%%%""""""""?%"%"% !"^&^*&*()
- <oNe> !safequit boing
- *** oNe has quit IRC (Quit: boing)
- -----------
- <Morphious> go!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!11111
- * Tank akills
- *** Global from OperServ: Threat eliminated, all systems returning to normal,
- have a nice day.
- <Morphious> we must change that message in the language phile some day
- <Tank> i'll get around to it! erm, tommorow...
- --------------------------------------------------------------------------------
- ----- The next day ------
- -------------------------
- (Neo/globops) i've put a return; into your mIRC client, it will be released in
- version 6.0
- *** Global from OperServ: access bypassed by non-oper (Neo)
- *** OperServ has quit IRC (segfault).
- (Neo/wallops) you cannot correct this, it will happen.
- (Neo/wallops) which network we chat in from then, is up to the users.
- ----------- The End ----------
- note from the author:
- ---------------------
- woah, what a load of wasted time really, lol, although it will probably make a
- few peeps laugh... my favorite bit is when agent_smith is making his little
- speech about the matrix.
- --- Email me at bofh@phreaker.net and tell me how you liked it :)
- This is Enstyne, signing off, what you read from here, is up to you.
- Chat Saphe, and Quit Saphe.
- *** Enstyne changes topic to 'remember, you see an IRCop, you part, you part
- your ass off'
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