These eight days have been a war between heaven and hell. Between me overdosing on medication and trying to prevent myself from getting dragged out of my fantasies, it's been one hellish ride.

My name is Xavier and I'm 16.

I am not a stranger to the world of isolation. Being homeschooled with no outside responsibilities gives you too much time by yourself. Only last year, have I found myself with a group of people I can call friends. But somehow like all social situations, you can only give me a matter of time before I fuck it up. Now it's an environment of friends and frenemies that I have to deal with on separate occasions. At least this year, I'm working towards getting a job in a totally new environment.
Because of the isolation, I spend a lot of time on the internet like any other teenager. I keep circling around sites that have high levels of toxicity like 4chan and Ifunny. You can add on Reddit as well if you like. But the truth to these sites is that they usually have high levels of quality porn as well.
While browsing /aco/, I stumbled on a cover of a comic that looked very promising. It was called "The Secret" by an artist named SketchToons. I didn't feel like going down the rabbit hole of reverse imaging, so I just decided to save a picture on to my phone.
Fast-cut to a few weeks later, it was Sunday night and I had two interviews in the morning. While sitting at my desk, I remembered that comic that I always wanted to check out.  I dug through threads, reverse image search, and even backtraced links before finding the original source material.

Please note: This is the turning point on the story where it becomes VILE and DISGUSTING. If you can not handle themes of Rape, Incest, Sexual-Assault, Violence, and Mental Illness. Please click off this post IMMEDIATELY.

I am not proud of who I have become.
Yes, I do get aroused by the things listed above. Please, do not instantly judge me on these things. I'm getting help for them and that's all you need to know.
Now back to the story.

I slowly started to scroll down the comic and found myself taking off my underwear.
The Secret is a twisted-porn comic of The Loud House. Luna Loud, one of the older sisters in the show. Becomes obsessed with her younger brother Lincoln after he told her he found her attractive. Luna (dealing with the stress of her past), then rapes Lincoln during one of their routines.  Lincoln then tells-off Luna, telling her that she never wants to do anything with her again. This sends Luna into a sporadic spiral of agony. Luna is terrified of being alone and is constantly dealing with the mental stress of her lonely past. She thinks that this is worse than dealing with the consequences of continuing to assault Lincoln. And plans her next move to make Lincoln hers, forever.
Luna reminds me of a person, and that person is myself. Years ago, I met my half-sister for the first time. Her name was Feliz. She was pretty and brave but egotistical and rude. When I first met her, I could tell our personalities weren't going to match. She was a popular high-schooler while I was an outcast elementary-schooler. But that didn't prevent me in falling in love with her. Year after year, fantasy after fantasy, I found myself being romanticly addicted to her body. Six long years later, I finally came out to Feliz. She rejected me; silently. She never responded to any of my texts. She avoids situations of me being alone with her; never sharing her true feelings about the event
I felt despair.
Feliz rejected me, like how Lincoln rejected Luna. They don't know how it feels to deal with the spiral of loneliness. They don't know how desperate you have to be in-order to fall in love with a sibling. You would utterly do anything for them, to seek their approval. But they throw you down to the dogs, leaving you to fight with the demons they have never encounter on your own. I wanted more. Luna wanted more.
We both wanted more.
While having that thought, a new scene popped up. It was Luna, taking a shower after her brother rejected her. During the altercation, Luna punched Lincoln in retaliation of the rejection; causing her to have his blood on her fingers. She felt alone again. To deal with this new ordain, she started to fantasize about her and Lincoln being together, sharing a life that she always wanted. She became aroused by the fantasies and started to masturbate using her little brother's blood as a lubricant.
I became more aroused as the scene went further. It even reminded me about the times I masturbated to Feliz in the shower. Luna started to masturbate fiercely, bringing herself close to the point of climax. She then took her fingers away from her groin and licked the blood residue off her hands. After finishing, she still had an obsession for Lincoln. She went into her room, still wondering about all the reasons why her little brother rejected her. Her thoughts sprained until she looks into her bedroom mirror. "Maybe I'm not pretty enough." thought Luna.  "Maybe. it's someone else he has his mind after." That thought angered her into the point of smashing her mirror. Luna began to violently wonder about who it could be. She started to cross off all remaining suspects in her mind until... bingo.
It has to be her older sister, Lenni. She had the sexier body, prettier hair, and way bigger chest. She always kept talking about how she wanted to take care of Lincoln because Luna seems too stressed out.
It had to be her.
Luna began to quiver with anger. The thoughts were overpowering her body movements. There was no possible way where she was ever going to let that happened. She got dressed, went downstairs into the kitchen, and made Lincoln his dinner. She hesitantly went back into Lincoln's room while he was relaxing and set the food on the dresser. She tried to convince Lincoln to at least eat his meal, somehow it works but not till after Luna leaves his room.
Luna was still paranoid. It didn't matter to her if what she did was wrong. Or if the consequences were going to be severe. She just didn't want Lincoln to taste the poison she spiked into the dish. She started to bite down on her bottom lip, causing her blood to be drawn. "This isn't my fault." "This is all somebody else's fault." She took her finger and wiped it with her blood. Luna was standing in the hallway, staring at a portrait of all of her siblings. "But, it's ok." I will make it go back to the way it used to be." Luna took her thin bloody finger and drew a heart on her brother's face.

"And I will make sure that nobody gets between us."

"She then directed her finger to the right and painted a bloody X on Lenni's face.

Then the story ends.

And I was fascinated.

It was a while since I've read a comic with this much of a complex plot. The story, the characters' motives, and reactions; they were all too familiar. Especially Luna's. Her desperateness, loneliness, and obsessiveness hold a mirror to my eyes. But instead of scaring me to run, it just pulled me closer.

I closed my eyes and visualized a scene.

I was suddenly in Luna's home.

Before this, I somehow managed to run into Luna and discovered her obsession with Lincoln. Instead of ridiculing her, I made a deal. If I help her little brother fall in love with her; she will convince my older sister to fall in love with me. She agreed. For the next following weeks, I and Luna tried to convince our siblings to give us a chance. But both we somehow simultaneously failed.
Luna was sobbing, violently. She was in the upstairs corridor, sitting against the wall; screaming her lungs out. No one was there to hear her sighs of pain. Except me, herself, and the reason behind it, Lincoln. He was in his room, just ignoring his sister's screams. I went straight upstairs to console Luna. She briefly looked up at me, became enraged, and tried to sprint her way into Lincoln's room. I barely grasped on to her, almost slipping during the process.
I started to pull Luna back, she flailed for a second before dropping. I set her against the wall and spoke with myself on the verge of tears.

"Fuck Feliz and screw Lincoln," I stated.

"We will find a way to move on without them."

Luna finally looked at me.

Her face was swollen but soft, red but blushing, freckly but cute. Her eyes were watery but just perfect enough that she still looked attractive. Like an actress weeping for the big screen.
I felt my heart racing, I couldn't understand the love of me why I had such a pretty girl in front of my face.
A girl that no one seeks for, a pretty girl that nobody wanted, nobody except me.

"And I just think I found a way how."

I lessen the distance between us and embrace her lips against mine.
It felt better than any embrace I had in my life.

Luna's crying began to cease. She finally felt safe, like somebody finally started to care about her.

"You think I'm pretty?"

"I thought you were fucking pretty from the start."

I kissed her one last time before my mind brought me back to my room.
It was safe to say that I didn't last too long after that. lol

I woke the next morning with the feeling of a hangover from a bachelor's party.

I instantly started to regret reading the comic the night before because of the job interviews I had to prepare for later that day. I could feel the obsession for the comic and Luna manifesting in my brain. And I definitely couldn't concentrate on that while trying to give a good impression to my interviewers. So I took twice the daily dose of my anxiety medication and left the house.

The medication did not help me at all.

During the car ride, all I kept thinking about was the story. I started to feel lost with myself and my thoughts, haphazardly responding to the conversations coming from my parents. We arrived shortly after our last discussion. I tried my best to prepare my distracted self and went ahead inside. The interview went fine. But I kept finding myself getting fatigued during it, only wanting to return to my obsessive thoughts with the story. I felt overjoyed when it was finally over. While I was walking out, I felt the medication slowly kicking in. It was dragging me from my body; making me further depersonalized than usual. We went to get lunch, eat, and prepare me for my second interview. But for the whole time, I was never really there.  I was just stuck, thinking about her.  By the time for my second interview, I was already long gone.
The depersonalization had already reached its limit and began to trigger serious acid flashbacks. I had to lie to my interviewer that I had a severe migraine to cover for my strangeness. I somehow managed again to pull through and left quickly with my disconcerted mind.

I made it home, dragged myself up the stairs and fell asleep on the theater room's couch.

I slept for the next three hours, ignoring the outside world and its calls.

I awoke. With one name plaguing my consensus.

Luna.


I stood up, ran into my room, and sat down at my computer desk.  I turned over all of the links and found the creator's page.

I started to study everything about her story. The pictures and portraits, the responses to the fans questions, and even the work on other projects. I fell in love seeing the art of Luna, especially one sadistic picture, of her staring at the screen.        I gaze the page for hours, letting it fuel my fantasies even further. Until I was interpreted.....

9/22/19
It's been so long since I first started writing this; so much about me and Luna's relationship changed.  So many new fantasies, so many new episodes. I finally felt like I have a family who loved me.  I love Luna, even more, and I'm a part of her family now. Luan is my second favorite Loud now, because out of all the Louds, she would be the first with me on Luna's side. Lincoln is like a brother to me now, I've never known we would actually get along, even what after I and Luna did. Even Leni and Lori like me now, after we bump heads a few times, they finally respected me. Especially, Lori, we fought the most but now we understand each other.

I forgot about my two friends. Max and Sam Sharp.

If you don't watch the show, Sam Sharp is the relationship character of Luna Loud. But, in The Secret, Luna never got the chance to dated Sam.

Instead, she dated Geroge (Sully in the real show) and he broke up with Luna for Ruth (Mazzy).

(Reality: The artist got tired of making LunaXGeroge content and drop it fully before making The Secret. Luna would have never became obsessed with Lincoln, if she was still dating Geroge. Also, Geroge is now dating Ruth, Both in the show and SketchToon's art. So it's either they broke up or never dated.)

Then she dated another guy (Anonymous) that left her for one of her sisters. Luna went insane, fell obsessed with Lincoln....blah, blah, blah, you get the point.

Then what happened to Sam Sharp?

During The Secret, Sam still stayed as Luna's friend. She didn't know exatly what was going on with Luna, she just knew it wasn't good. Sam tried to help Luna as far as she could without getting fully involved.

After I and Luna fell in love (The end of The Secret), she introduced me to Sam while I introduce her to Max.

(Reality: Luna got really bored in my mind one day and decided to make Max and Sam come to life. As soon as she did, they fell in love with each other instantly.)

Who the hell is Max?
Max is my personal original character.
No, he was not made just to be with Sam.
And NO, he was never meant to be in The Loud House. He was made a year ago before any of these events.

Max is a black gun-for-hire hitman who lives by himself in New York City. He's somewhere between the ages of 16 to 20 and has no Lastname. He wears a black t-shirt with black jeans and wears fingerless leather gloves.
Max wears a leather black trenchcoat, no matter what. It could be 98 degrees outside and he could give less of a shit. He also wears a black half-face mask (rough example) that he rarely takes off.
Max cannot speak. He just can't.  Let's not go into as of why.   T R A U M A T I C  M E M O R Y
Max fight and kills a lot of people. So to cope with this, He listens to music, constantly, all the fucking time actually.

Even while fighting.

Max enters into a stage of mind that I like to call "Focus Mode".
If Max is listening to music while fighting an opponent, he will hit that opponent to the beat of the song.
Example: One Beat = One Punch, Kill, or Hit
He will also move, dodge, and maneuver to the speed of the song.
The louder the song gets, the more aggressive that Max becomes.

That guy played fucking ring-around-the-rosie with a Chinese triad ganglord and threw him out of a skyscraper window; during a police-raid.
He was listening to Teenagers by My Chemical Romance, by the way.

Anyways, now back to The Loud House

Luna fell in love with Max's story and personality and she wanted to be his friend, so she made him real. thanks, luna

And I didn't have time to make Max an actual loud-house backstory, so I just introduced him to Sam as my friend.

Max gave Sam this expressional face of love, Sam was into it before quickly re-prioritizing her objective; getting back in love with Luna.
But Sam wanted to hide this, so she dated Max for months on end to hold her over.

Which eventually led to us to ripping each other's throats out, breaking Luna's guitar, hugging-it-out, going to California, holding down a hobo while Sam punches him in the stomach to get her phone back out, realizing that Max and Luna stuff themselves in the trunk because they don't both trust us.
And Sam finally realizing that Max is truly for her.

All jokes aside, Me and Sam are still best friends. And Max loves to hang out with our group of shenanigans, he has nothing else better to do anyway.

The bad thing is, Max, Sam, and Luna, are the best friends I ever had.
Both in Fiction and Reality.

EPISODES
1. Xavier Vs. Luke And Lulu - Xavier wakes up to find Luna missing and instead finds; Luke and Lulu!? P.S - What a horrible but nice dream.
2. Operation: Lori - Sam, Max, and Xavier tried to break Luna out after Lori put the whole house on lockdown.
3. Really Loud Music: Max, Sam, and Xavier Edition - This is an alternate version of the original Loud House episode, Really Loud Music. - After Luna reveals herself and goes against Michelle and Douglas's plans; Sam helps Lynn (Instead of Lana helping Lynn) shoot the cannons to keep them away. Love-hearts start to form in Xavier's eyes and moves closer to the stage to watch. Luna sees this and smiles back at him. After finishing her song and explaining why you should always be yourself; Max violently drags both Michelle and Douglas out of the auditorium and the crowd cheers. Luna jumps into Xavier's arms and hugs him tightly. As an award, Xavier invites Max, Sam, and the Louds to his favorite pizza place! P.S - Don't ask Xavier about where Max put Michelle and Douglas. He doesn't know the answer.
4. The Sweet Spot: Max, Sam, and Xavier Edition - This is an alternate version of the original Loud House episode, The Sweet Spot. - After Lincoln thinks he's in the clear, a scene reveals that Luna, Max, Sam, and Xavier are hiding in a bush. The gang attacks Lincoln at the wrong time and results in Max being hit on the head by Luan and Xavier being pepper-spayed by Lincoln. Sam has to drag a blinded Xavier and a concussed Max back home. Xavier still happily tells Luna bye as he walks off. Luna then gets enraged and goes back into the fight.
5. Happy Valentine's Day from Luna and Xavier - Luna and Xavier struggle as they try to find each other a gift on Valentine's Day. F.Y.I - This is how Xavier got Luna's guitar, and he will wear it probably for the rest of his life.
6. Sam and Xavier's Californian Adventure - Sam becomes enraged with envy and fights Xavier. During the feud, Sam knocks Xavier onto Luna's guitar, causing it to break. He screams at Sam to stop and tells her the truth while sobbing. They made up but quickly remember Luna's guitar. Xavier then comes-up with a sketch plan to secretly go to LA to ask the animators to fix it. Sam agrees, and they leave without telling Max and Luna. F.Y.I - This fight was very violent, Sam almost scratches Xavier's eye out and he had to throw her down a hill. Also, Max and Luna hid in the trunk and followed them the whole trip.
7. The Loud Games: Luan Vs. Luna - Luan and Luna fight over parts of their room. They agreed to settle it out in war and battle their friends against each other. F.Y.I - This is the episode where Geroge and Ruth are kicked off the show. P.S - It was Max and Sam's fault. Also, they might be dead.
8. Happy Birthday, Max - Xavier and the Louds work together to get Max to enjoy his birthday. P.S - Sorry for stringing you up to the ceiling, Lana.
9. Babysitting Lincoln - Xavier volunteers to babysit the traumatized, miserable, and insufficient Lincoln Loud. F.Y.I - This is when Xavier and Lincoln's relationship starts to bloom. They see it each other as the bothers they never had.
10. Out Of The Spotlight - The whole cast gets a break from Lincoln and Xavier because they get locked inside a disciplinary class. P.S - Screw being the main character.
11. We Know The Secret: Part One - During a road trip, Leni accidentally locks Xavier, Lincoln, Clyde, and Sam in a hot car. Will the heat break them?  F.Y.I - Xavier insults Lincoln, using the traumatic moment of what Luna did to him as a weapon. Xavier immediately regretted this. Lincoln, in tears of anger, starts hitting Xavier as he moved to the front seat. Xavier only has seconds to realize what he just has done, until Luna opens his door. Luna stumbles on to a scene of Lincoln, holding Sam while crying, Clyde looking scared, and Xavier's face being plagued by regret and guiltiness. The look on Xavier's face is what scared her the most. Everyone gets out of the car; including Xavier. In a scared, confused, and worried voice, "What happened?" Said Luna. Xavier looks up at her then looks around the scene he put himself in. Max and Lucy exited the trunk while looking confused, Lincoln crying in Sam's arms, while she was upset at Xavier; Clyde looking worried next to them. Xavier took Luna's guitar and off his back and stared down on it. He slowly lifts his face back up to her's and hands her back her guitar. Xavier moves past Luna and walks away. The rest of the louds just briefly exited the gas station while he walked away. Luan was near the gas-pumps, Leni and Lori just stepped outside of the store to see Xavier walking off, Lana, Lola, and Lynn were still inside. Mr. and Mrs. Loud were just catching up with Leni and Lori; to catch a glimpse of what happened. Everyone stares at Xavier as he walks into the desert alone. Luna and only Luna stared in-complete worriedness. Not about Lincoln; but about her lover. The episode ends. P.S - I didn't mean to explain the whole other half but I guess I did anyway. P.S.S - I'm sorry for what I said, Lincoln.
12. We Know The Secret: Part Two - The secret is finally out. What the hell are Luna and Xavier going to do?  P.S - To avoid another long explanation, you can read it just right here.
Season One Shorts
- Luna's Friends Presents: Super Smash Bros - Luna's friends get together to play a game of Smash! The console blew-up after Xavier and Luna use their final-smash together at the same time. F.Y.I - Luna was Mario, Max was Luigi, Sam was Peach, and Xavier was Link.
- Happy Face - The Louds try to help fix Xavier's face after it becomes scambled-up.
- We Know You - The Louds have known Luna's friends for a while now, and they gather everyone for a family photo. But Xavier has second thoughts.
- Boredom Can Be Really Loud - Xavier, Luna, Max, and Sam all become simultaneously bored. Then they try to look for each other. P.S - Don't break into a house because you thought it was mine, Max!
- The Exterminator's Brother: Apex Legends X The Loud House - The Exterminator comes back for revenge, but this time he brings backup. His brother, Caustic!?
Season Two
1. The Leni Episode - Everyone doesn't know what Leni does all day except following Lori. Leni feels hurt by this, so she tries to film an episode all by herself.
2. Saving Lincoln - Luna, Xavier, Max, and Sam try to save Lincoln from getting jumped by bullies. F.Y.I - This is when the cast's alternate costumes first appear. You can learn what they look like here.
3. Friends Of The Louds - Xavier invites the Louds and all of their friends to a family celebration but struggles to find a song. F.Y.I - This is Xavier's FAVORITE EPISODE. The theme-song gets redefined in this episode. It becomes less silly and more catchy and energetic. The song is now sung by Xavier himself. And now runs in the hallway with Lincoln during the Title Sequence.  P.S - I told you it was going to be loud, Luna. :)
4. Thinking Out Loud - After not seeing the Louds for a week, Xavier spends the day reminiscing his favorite moments with them.
5. Shipped Away - Lincoln's father takes the family out on the lake, but Captain Rockbeard and his Crew (Xavier, Max, and Sam in pirate-disguises) reveal they pimped-out the ship for the family's pleasure. F.Y.I - The ship gets attacked by Lisa's test-subject enlarged octopus.
6. The Loud "Proud" Family - Max, Xavier, and Lincoln step into an alternate dimension where the Louds are...black. P.S - Seeing myself white was not a good site.
7. Too Many Lunas - The previous portal causes a dimensional rift and sucks Luna in, splitting her and spitting (Luke, Lulu, Lucia, and Bunny Luna) out. Xavier then has to take care of all of them until Luna returns. P.S - Playing The Sign by Ace of Base at 3-am will be and is annoying, Lulu.
8. Oblivion's Closet - Luna and Xavier search for Luan after she disappears into her closet. They find that it's a black matterless void that scatters on forever. What is Luan hiding?
9. The Loud Games: Shopping Spree - Luan and Xavier work together against Sam & Luna and Lucy & Max for the Ultimate Mother's day gift!
10. Where Are Your Parents? - The Mother's day ruckus gets Leni and Lori suspicious about Xavier's past and original family. F.Y.I - The Louds (except Luna) cornered Xavier until he admits that he deleted his parents and Max & Sam's parents for a more comfortable plot; which causes a bad fight between them. Xavier then frustratedly leaves after the argument; Luna then angrily erupts on Max and Sam for ganging-up on him and Leni and Lori being nosey.
11. Out Of My Mind - Xavier's mind finally starts to fall apart. Luna comes over and tries to help Xavier relax. Max and Sam (though reluctant) even come over and try to help their friend out. While everyone is sitting on the couch and Xavier lays on Luna's lap, A song starts to play on the radio. This song triggers an emotional reaction, causing Xavier's mind to rip Luna, Max, Sam's world apart. The gang now has to fight, find, and play their way back home; through Xavier's scattered mind of memories and thoughts.
12. Luna and Sam - The world is together but frozen; the band is tired and on its last knees. They need to play one more song in a chance for anything to go back to normal again.  F.Y.I - Luna is injured in this episode, and wear temporarily a bandage warp on her right thigh. Also, this is where the Xavier and Sam feud officially ends.
Season Two Shorts
- Mirror Act - Luna and Xavier (and their opposite selves, Luke and Female Xavier) put on a show for the Loud Family!
- Max & Sam Vs. Sam & Max - Max and Sam face their biggest rivals yet! Sam & Max, The Freelance Police!
Season Three
1. The Checklist - After the finale shows that the original episode "Racing Hearts", reveals that Sam and Luna have nothing in common. The band makes a checklist to see what they do. F.Y.I - Luna, Max, and Xavier are ok at dancing while Sam is not. Luna and Xavier suck with animals, while Max and Sam are great. Xavier and Max are good at cooking, and Luna and Sam suck. And the whole band hates baking and gospel music with a passion. P.S - I and Luna are also really good hallucinators.
2. Happy Halloween from Max and Sam - Sam helps Max enjoy his Halloween Night while Xavier and Luna are stuck on guard-duty, trick and treating with the Louds. P.S - Don't scrape and lick apples in front of me, Clyde.
3. Welcome To The Upside-Down House - While Xavier is babysitting Lena; so that the older Louds can get a break. The house starts to shake violently and literally flips upside-down. Xavier with Lena tries to maneuver and rescue the others in a destroyed, obsoleted, and upside-down version of The Loud House.
4. Xavier and Luna Crashes A Wedding - With Max and Sam, of course. Lori regretfully invites the family and band to her ex-fiance's wedding. Xavier, Luna, Max, Sam, are already trying to find some ways to ruin it. Including Lori, who finds herself envious of the bride. Xavier then tells her, "If you hate a wedding, why not crash it? And do it in a very, Loud style!"

NOTE: These are only brief descriptions of the episodes. They have a lot more details, story-arch, and character development that I did not cover. If you would like to know more about an episode, just ask.

Songs and Album
Sam: Plays the guitar, bass, or sings. She does vocals for songs from Tegan and Sara, Florence and the Machine, Billie Eilish, and sometimes Rare Americans.
Max: Mostly drums; but plays the guitar and bass when needed too. He can't sing because you know why. But he's a big AJR fan, not sure why.
Luna: Luna is the most universal. She mostly plays guitar and bass, but she'll switch to drums and vocals when needed. She does backup vocals for Tegan and Sara, Rare Americans, and Florence and the Machine. And she main vocals for P!nk.
Xavier: Mostly sings, but plays the guitar and bass, and some background instruments when needed. He does vocals for Twenty-One Pilots, Younger Hunger, Rare Americans, and any song in existence that has a male singer.

Sam's Song: The Dog Days Are Over - Florence and the Machine - REALLY GOOD
Luna and Sam's Song: I'll Be Back Someday - Tegan and Sara - REALLY GOOD
Luna and Xavier's Song: Blame It On My Youth - Blink-182  - REALLY GOOD
Luna's Song: So What - P!nk
Max's Song: Break My Face - AJR
Xavier's Song: Summer Bummer - Younger Hunger - REALLY GOOD
Other Songs We Play
- Dead Inside - Younger Hunger
- Rare Americans - Two Lives
- Tegan and Sara - Closer
- Twenty-One Pilots - The Run And Go
- Rare Americans - Let Go For Love
- Twenty-One Pilots - Screen
- Gold Rush - Death Cab For Cutie
- Billie Eilish - Hostage
Do you still love Luna?
I do, and I love her family even more. It's been so long, and I still can't stop thinking about them. My brain tries to hurt me by hurting them. But, I keep going anyway; Luna keeps me imagining, Max keeps me fighting, Sam keeps me going.

I like to think I'm the only one who loves Luna, but I'm not. There's must be some other person out there, obsessing over her, like me.

And I'll say to that person, Fuck You. You wouldn't do half the shit I would sacrifice for them. I would swim through vomit and fucking blood before you even think about it. I would fight you to the death for her and her family; I don't give a shit about myself anyway.

Even though we fight, I still wish I can call Lori my sister, or Lincoln, my younger brother; I kind of find myself obsessed with All the Louds now, to be honest. Luna is still my number one though.

I'll do anything to make them real. Or even, to just have a picture with all of us together at least.

Messages For The Louds. - Final Passage
To Lena: You were the cutest baby that I've to have ever seen. Your smile almost convinces me to have kids of my own. You remind me of the innocence; that I lost so long ago. I just hope you'll become a better person than me.

To Lana: Hey, Lana. I hope you enjoyed the baseball bat I gave you; it's an excellent gift, for the perfect troublemaker! I'm sorry we didn't hang out as much as I would like too, but I saw you, Lana, and I will never forget you.

To Lola: Hey, Princess. I hope your younger sister hasn't given you a concussion yet. Those can really hurt! But, I know you're strong, you rock the same dress without caring almost every day! I also wish we could have hung out more, maybe one day we have an episode with You, Me, and Lana!
I love you, Lola.

To Lisa: Knowing you, you'll probably tell me that love is only a biochemical response that's caused by the impulses in your brain. And, you'll walk off thinking that you've surrounded by a house full of idiots.

The truth is, we are. That's why you're essential to us.

There's no-one with the scruffiest hair and the dorkiest glasses; who can make the most powerful potions and poisons than anyone I know.
\Well that, and I don't anyone else who would make their sister's boyfriend fight a giant octopus.

We need your more than you realize, Lisa.

To Lucy: Max loves you. I've haven't seen him this happy for a kid for a long time. And you will keep seeing him happy forever; because I'm leaving him here with you. You need and deserve someone to help push the bad-days away.
P.S - Please don't turn into a killer assassin like Max, the boys will be all over you!

To Lincoln: You're the Loud that shines in the spotlight, the main character of your family story and mine.

I don't know how you do it, Lincoln. Well, with the help of a script and an animation team, of course. But still, it's impressive carrying a show on your back.
Everyone loves you; everyone wants a piece of you, maybe even a little too much.

I'm sorry for the pain I caused you, Luna is too. It shows acts of maturity forgiving those who were supposed to lead you by example.
I am, before and after, still your friend, and I would even love to call you my brother, you're at the world's center of attention, Lincoln Loud.

Hold it, and don't you ever let it go.

To Lynn:  I'm sorry, Lynn. I feel bad for not adding you to anything. My mind simply didn't see a reason for you to be in my stories.

A long time ago, you were my favorite Loud. I was an athlete, just like you and the same age. At the time, I thought you looked pretty cute.

I guess times change, huh?
For better or for worse.

I promise I'll save you a spot, Lynn.

To Luan: Thank you.

Thank you for everything.

Thank you for helping me defend Luna against everyone.

Thank you for calming her down after I fought with Max, Sam, and Lori.

Thank you for distracting that octopus enough for me to finish it.

Thank you for being my shopping cart buddy and defeating the odds.

Thank you for entertaining us. Your jokes were never that bad.

And even though your friends are clowns, they'll always be invited to this circus.


You wanna know what's the funniest joke, Luan?

I always said that you were my second favorite Loud.

But really, you were tied with Luna.

Take care of her, ok?


To Leni: It's amazing how I see you in a bad light, but you've never said anything hurtful to me at all.
You keep quiet, Leni. You simply like to follow your big sister around.

But I guess, a Leni without a Lori, is like a Sidekick without a Superhero.

You just feel lost.

But you're no sidekick, Leni. You are your own person. You can be whoever you like to be.

Just be you.


To Lori:  Hey, Sister. Can I call you that?

Because a part of me still wants to call you that.

I don't hate you, Lori. And I know you don't hate me either.

We're just two people who bump heads, like a spot in your house where you always hit your elbow on.

But somehow, after all the arguments, the name-calling, and the makeups, you were still ten times better than my real sister.

You get bonus points because you were actually there.

You weren't that bad, Lori. You weren't even bad at all.

I also heard what you said to Luna after I left when the house flipped over.

Thanks for that.


To Mr. & Mrs. Loud: I like you, guys. Now, why you two never show your faces in the first seasons, I'm not sure. But, the moments I got alone with you two; were spectacular.

You guys are a team that always work well together. Your husband's kind charisma and your wife's sassiness; always put a smile on my face.

I was scared you wouldn't accept me. Especially, appearing obsessed with you and your family.

But, thank you.

You made The Loud House into what it is.


For Luna Loud:

People would say you were just a bunch of lines and colors.

A fictional character that never existed, only coming to life like a puppet, with the use of an animation team and a voice actor.

Someelse's figurative imagination, being manipulated by thousands of other minds. Before it ever, got to yours.

But somehow.

But somehow, you were still more fucking real to me than flesh and blood.

If you were just a source of my imagination, then why could I not throw you away like a thought? Why did you keep staying?

Why did you become my friend? Why did you have your own personality, thoughts, and ideas?

You ley with me every night, I couldn't see you, but I knew you were there.

You waited for me to forgive you after I found out about you and Sam.

You followed me around for two days, just calling my name, waiting for me to talk to you.

You claimed me down after seeing Rule-34 of you, being weirded-out but reassuring me at the same time.

It was your idea to bring Max and Sam together; I never thought the two would get along.

I was so happy when you gave me your guitar. I knew you had no money, but you still gave me such a priceless gift.

I felt you.

Your short but stylish hair, your soft, pale, and freckly skin. Your thin and slim body, that was somehow more comfortable to lay on than my bed. And I really never cared about you being flat-chested, It just made you cuter in every way.

Beside your backside, Jesus Christ, Rockstar. I could make an entire essay on only that!

But I probably won't; you're more than just a thousand words; like how you're more than a bunch of lines and colors.


You saved me, Rockstar.

You saved me when you ran into me.

You saved me by staying with me; by standing aside me.

You used to wait for hours until I got off shift, to walk home with me.

Then hold me and slowly fell asleep together.

I wanted to kill myself, Luna.
I was so isolated and alone, all I had were my two parents.

I never want to go back. I don't want to be alone again.

I would die for you, Luna. I want to be with you forever. I want to follow you, with Max and Sam. We were a team and an addition to your family.

I finally found my friends; I finally found my family.

I fucking hate it here, Rockstar.

I'm tired of not being in control, being surrounded by people who don't care about you, feeling embarrassed, feeling destroyed, feeling worthless.

But I don't feel that when I'm with you.

I love you, Luna Loud. I hope you can hear that.

If I did marry you, we would totally take your last name.


"Luna! Why are you here!?" - Lincoln

"Wherever the music goes, I follow!" - Luna

And wherever you go, I follow.

5/27/19 - 10/15/19
Tl;dr: You've should have just read.










Geroge X Luna (Broke Up) > The Secret > Geroge X Ruth  + Xavier X Luna + Max X Sam - TRUE TIMELINE

Geroge X Luna (Still Together) > The Secret > Geroge X Ruth
NOTE: Luna wouldn't be obsessed over Lincoln; If she was still in a relationship.
NOTE: Geroge and Ruth couldn't be with each other in 2019.

The Secret > Geroge X Luna > Geroge X Ruth
NOTE: Geroge and Ruth couldn't be with each other in 2019.


If Luna went with Sam > The Loud House (Offical Show)
If Luna went with Geroge > The Secret + Geroge X Ruth + Xavier X Luna