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NameIsJolly

Skittows Stowies Fife: Hopsital

Mar 25th, 2012
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  1. >"You fuckin' idiot."
  2. "It's not my fault!"
  3. >"Uh, yeah. It is. Don't you know like, 25-"
  4. "Percent of fluffy ponies die from drowning each year, yeah, I fucking know, but he won't wake up. He needs some kind of help now!"
  5. >How is it that vets can never find good help
  6. >The tired woman looks down at skittles, unconscious in your arms
  7. >"Looks stable to me. Sit over there and we'll get to him when we get to him."
  8. "What? He needs the doctor now!"
  9. >"Sir, with all due respect, fuck off and sit your ass down."
  10. >You sit, not happy
  11. >You feel like you should be doing something for Skittles, like trying to wake him or something, but you're afraid you'd do more harm than good
  12. >Skittles is completely still, but breathing
  13. >You're lucky he's alive
  14. >Fuck
  15.  
  16. >After a whole god damn half hour the doctor comes out for you
  17. >"Mr... Anon?"
  18. "Yeah, that's me!"
  19. >You walk with him out into the hallway
  20. >He seems flustered, as many doctors do
  21. "It's my fluffy, he almost-"
  22. >"Drowned? Let me guess, you tried feeding it without a bottle?"
  23. "Yeah."
  24. >"1: Fuck yourself. 2: Get a bottle. 3: Read a god damn book about owning a pet before you buy one, ass-clown."
  25. >He grabs Skittles out of your arms effortlessly and lays him on the table
  26. >He inspects him a bit, including opening his eyelids
  27. >"Yeah, he's dying."
  28. "WHAT!?"
  29. >"Shut the fuck up, I can fix this."
  30. >He reaches to the counter in the room and pulls a little tool off of it
  31. >He places two soft prongs from the tool on Skittles' belly
  32. >"1, 2, 3."
  33. >He presses the tool down onto Skittles. Nothing happens.
  34. >"1, 2, 3."
  35. >Nothing happens
  36. >"1, 2, 3."
  37. >Jab
  38. >Nothing happens
  39. >Skittles has stopped breathing
  40.  
  41. >"Well, fuck."
  42. "What do you mean?!"
  43. >"He's fucked. He's got water in his lungs, but I'm not getting a response out of him. He's still alive, but he'll be dead in a few minutes."
  44. >A silence enters
  45. >The doctor isn't stirred by this at all
  46. >You don't blame him; these things must drop like flies, given the amount of owners who are as shitty as you
  47. >Oh man, he's dead
  48. >"Yeah.... I'm calling it."
  49. >He sees your depression and hesitates a moment before resuming his job
  50. >"You can see the receptionist on the way out. I gotta go, you know... more of this shit."
  51. "Yeah, no... sure thing... thanks..."
  52. >Silence
  53. >"Hey, buddy, don't worry about it. I've seen worse owners than you."
  54. >The comment doesn't make you fe-
  55. >
  56. >Skittles' right forehoof wiggles and his snout erupts in a fountain of excess water and mucus
  57. >His eyes open wide and tear up
  58. >He's wiggling around the table like a madman
  59. >The doctor springs into action and grabs a sponge and washcloth off of the counter to clean up all the shit
  60. "What?! What happened?!"
  61. >He looks at you
  62. >"Dude, it's a little fluffy pony. Fuck if I know."
  63. >Skittles is shouting
  64. >"Why tummy huwt! Owchies, daddy!"
  65.  
  66. "Skittles!"
  67. >You go in for a hug, but the doctor stops you
  68. >"Woah woah, buddy, I need to clean this up first. We're not out of the woods."
  69. >"Daddy dis pwace *cough* scawyyy!"
  70. "I know, I know, kiddo, just relax, it'll be okay."
  71. >"Daddy..."
  72. >You're all silent while the doctor finishes wiping
  73. >After he's done, he backs off
  74. >Skit is fine, just wet a bit
  75. >You come in to pick him up and pull him to your chest
  76. >Skittles is crying
  77. >"Daddy i sowwy, Skittows sowwy!"
  78. "What? No, no, you didn't do anything wrong!"
  79. >"No wan' spwashies no mow!"
  80. >The doctor tosses you a spare bottle
  81. >"Yeah, you're gonna want one of these, idiot.""
  82. "Thanks, thanks, man..."
  83. >"Yeah, that's gonna be 20$."
  84. "For a bottle?"
  85. >"Fuck you, I just brought him back from the dead."
  86. >You hand him the money, trying to calm Skittles down
  87. >He's down to a slow whimpering
  88. "You think he's, like, immortal or something?"
  89. >"Don't be retarded."
  90. "Don't be Ableist!"
  91. >"Get the fuck out, I gotta go save people's pets."
  92. >"Daddy i dun wike dis fweind..."
  93.  
  94. >After another joyous talk with the receptionist, and a perfectly reasonable fee, you and Skittles arrive back home
  95. >He can't wait to see George again
  96. >By the time you open the door his fluff has dried and he seems to understand what you did was an accident
  97. >He still seemed a bit more wary, though, he might be a bit scarred
  98. >As soon as you get in, he starts wiggling his hooves mindlessly toward the living room
  99. >You take him there and he catches up with george
  100. >"Geowge! Geowge! Skittows missed yow sooo much!"
  101. >He doesn't even check for a reaction before the huggies start
  102. >You crouch down to see them better
  103. "You miss george?"
  104. >He turns his head to you and nods yes furiously
  105. >"Daddy why did we go to dat scawy pwace?"
  106. >He doesn't even remember what happened
  107. >You don't know if you should baww, daww, or be thankful
  108. "Daddy tried to make you drink some water, but I didn't think too far ahead and I screwed up."
  109. >"But Skittows was thowsty!"
  110. "I know, but I should have fed you from one of these special bottles, see? Daddy made a huge mistake, and he almost killed you."
  111. >Skittles coughs up some water on George
  112. >"Skittows is sowwy, wat did skittows do?"
  113. >He lacks the capacity to understand the idea of authority figures making mistakes
  114.  
  115. "Skit, you didn't do anything, it was an accident."
  116. >"Assadint?"
  117. >Fuck it
  118. "You still thirsty?
  119. >"Skittows hungies and thowsties."
  120. >Pick up Skittles and take him to the kitchen, he still has george hanging out of his snout
  121. >Feed him from his new bottle
  122. >He dubs it a "nummy-bub"
  123.  
  124. -END-
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