Hermetic Anon

>"Hey girls, you ever wonder why Anon is always alone?"
>The girls around the table looked at Sunset and then each other.
>"Nope." Rainbow Dash broke the silence and shrugged anticlimactically.
>"Now that you mention it dear, I haven't ever seen him talk to another student. Poor thing must be lonely."
>Twilight nodded and added: "And I haven't ever seen him get a bad grade. I'm ashamed to admit, I've been feeling just a tiny bit threatened."
>"What?! That creep is threatening you?!" Rainbow Dash bolted up furiously.
>"Wha- No! God no! I mean that academically!"
>"P-please don't shout in the cafeteria, Rainbow Dash. Not that I'm blaming you or anything..."
>Fluttershy's voice trailed off in apologies and RD sat back down.
>"Oh, okay. So what, he's some kind of a super egghead then?"
>"I didn't say that." Twilight retorted, with some coolness her voice. "Let's just say he reads a LOT of books. At least half as much as me, I never see him without one."

>"So if ah heard ya right, he don't got much in the way of friends now, does he?"
>"Looks like that's the way it is, AJ." Sunset concluded.
>"Then it's decided!!!" Screamed Pinkie, causing Fluttershy to almost fall off of her seat.
>"We're gonna have a new! Best! Friend!"
>Before anyone could react, Pinkie had already thrown a fistful of confetti over their heads, which was now slowly landing on everyone's mashed potatoes.
>"PINKIE!" Everyone exclaimed in unison.
>Everyone but Fluttershy, she was content with emitting a barely audible 'huu' sound.

>Be Anonichus Etherius Trismegistus the Magister Templi
>The seer of the unseen and the unraveler of esoteric gnosis.
>But your friends could call you Anon.
>You had no friends, though.
>At only 10 years old you had already reached the rank of an Adept, going by your late father's books.
>You were a prodigy, there was no way you would let yourself stagnate at the rank of a mere Magister.
>You HAD to become a Magus, no matter the cost to your mind or body.
>Or even soul, if such a thing truly existed.
>Letting your mashed potatoes go cold (indeed, what was cafeteria food to food for thought) you opened the first page of your 'Lemegeton'
>The Lesser Key of Suliman, an ancient anonymous grimoire on commanding and conjuring dark spirits.
>This version was translated some hundred years ago by a revolutionary occultist, Al Aister Crawli.
>You had not dared to touch it, growing up, but you now knew how to sufficiently protect yourself.
>As you're reading the book's preface, you sense a sinister presence approach you from behind.
>With the practiced movements of a true ceremonial magician, you slam the book shut and whirl around.
>From the confines of your robe-like coat, you pull out your ceremonial dagger. You keep it on you at all times, just in case.
>You come face to face with your attacker and now behold the vilest of all possible being that could have invaded your reading space.
>A well-meaning young girl.

>While Pinkie was getting a scolding from Twilight, the rest of the girls had decided that Sunset should be the first one to approach Anon.
>She didn't object, as this had been her idea from the start. She could relate to someone who didn't have any real friends, maybe more so than the others.
>"Twi was right, he's reading something again..." Sunset mumbled to herself, as she could see Anon open up a gloomy, leather covered book.
>She didn't know how to approach someone who was reading, maybe it was better to wait for a new opportunity?
>But Anon was always reading.
>At least he just started, maybe he won't mind even if I interrupt him for just a little.
>With this justification, Sunset gathered enough courage to put one foot in front of another and approach the lone boy's table.
>What should she say?
>With countless bad ideas racing through her head, she settled on one.
>Ask him about his book, that ought to work, right?
>Right.
>She reached Anon and opened her mouth right before something scary happened.

>WOOSH!
>Sunset had never had a knife pointed at her before.
>She was looking at Anon, who was pointing a bizarre looking knife at her and staring back with a complicated expression.
>His features were obscured by a shadow cast by the large red hood of his coat.
>After a few seconds, which felt more like minutes, Anon quickly hid his implement of murder within the confines of his clothing.
>"Sorry. I felt threatened." Spoke an ominous, choked voice.
>Anon turned around, showing his back to her once again.
>Sunset's heart was racing, for a brief moment, she had stared death in the eye.
>"N-no problem! Haha... I did approach you from behind, didn't I, my bad!"
>What was she saying, of course it wasn't her bad! No sane person would react like that, no matter how you approached them!
>She was much too scared of Anon to say that though.
>This person was dangerous, but something within her refused to back down.

>Anon had taken his seat and was opening the gloomy looking book once again.
>"H-hey watcha reading?"
>She blurted the only line in her head.
>"N-n..."
>She carefully leaned over his shoulder and tilted her head to listen.
>"Sorry, what was that? Didn't quite catch it."
>"N-NOTHIIIIIING!"
>A high pitched screech resonated through the cafeteria like a banshee in a tin can.
>Students all around stopped what they were doing and looked for the source of the horrible sound.
>Sunset stumbled backwards in surprise as Anon hurriedly stuffed his book into his bag and jumped over the table, running out of the cafeteria like a wild gazelle.
>"W-what was that...?"
>She had no idea what she had done wrong.
>Did Anon make that sound? Sunset didn't think boys could scream like that.
>"Sunny, are you alright?! What in tarnation happened?"
>Her friends who had been watching the events unfold from their table were now running to her aid.

>Be Anon
>You just pulled a ceremonial blade on a student. A girl, no less.
>It wasn't a real weapon, but the court of public opinion wouldn't see it like that.
>Fuckfuckfuckfuckfuck...
>She looks scared, I probably look pretty scary.
>Better put the blade away, at least. Then I'll apologize. Right.
>She'll forgive me if I apologize, right? At least she didn't scream yet.
>You quickly return the ceremonial tool back whence you conjured it.
>Time for an apology. Make it heartfelt.
>"Sorry, I felt threatened."
>THAT WAS TERRIBLE!
>Oh no, don't look at me like that.
>You turn around and hide your face in your trembling hands.
>This is a disaster. Think. Think.
>You ignore the girl standing behind you and sit down. This was your ultimate trump card. No matter how bad the situation was, you could always calm yourself down by reading.
>It worked.
>Suddenly a foul hex broke your spell of concentration.
>Words so unimaginably wretched they had to have been dripping from the lips of some daemoniac fiend, like black venom.
>"H-hey watcha reading?"
>So stygian was the pronunciation that your blood ran cold and your jaw locked in place.
>N-n...

>The girl had leaned closer.
>You desperately tried to formulate an answer, but your mind was going blank.
>She was touching your shoulder.
>"N-NOTHIIIIIING!"
>You bellowed a powerful war cry and stuffed your book into your bag.
>The girl fell backwards on her butt, her eyes wide and her mouth open.
>This called for a tactical retreat.
>With the grace of a practicing master of the art, you leaped on top of the table.
>This was the altar for your ritual of escape.
>You had memorized the positions of the cardinal directions inside the cafeteria, thus it only took you a second to begin your wordless incantation.
>Come unto me, O thou of the four winds, almighty one, who breathest spirit into men to give them life;
>Whose name is hidden, and beyond the power of men to speak; no prophet can pronounce it; yea, even daimons, when they hear thy name, are fearful!
>You hadn't ever thought words of power this fast.
>But you had assumed a (albeit rushed) godform of Lord Hermes, the Thrice Great.
>You felt unrivaled power and speed coursing through your legs.
>And with that, you flew out of the cafeteria with the mighty fury of a raging gale.