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Normal_Norman

Normal Norman - The Aryan Beauty and the Racist

Jun 7th, 2013
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  1. >Once upon a time, in a town in the middle of nowhere,
  2.  
  3. >A young man went to a normal school
  4. >Although he didn't have everything his heart desired,
  5. >The man led a happy life
  6.  
  7. >But then, on his first day in this school,
  8. >An old janitor talked to him and offered him a tour on the school in return for his attention
  9. >Confused by the many colors of the students there
  10. >The man uttered a single question
  11. >"What's wrong with all the colored people?"
  12.  
  13. >But his question was not answered. and the janitor wished him a nice year
  14. >When he left the janitor's side.
  15. >He came to know that the question he made was heard by all the students, and the janitor revealed himself as the funder of the school
  16.  
  17. >The man tried to apologize,
  18. >but it was too late,
  19. >For all the students had already decided a way of dealing with him.
  20.  
  21. >So as punishment,
  22. >They called him a fucking racist
  23. >And that was what the school and all who studied there thought of him
  24.  
  25. >Ashamed of his new reputation,
  26. >the man decided to go on as if nothing had happened
  27. >With his assistance to class as his only window to a social life.
  28.  
  29. >The situation at hand had indeed a solution which he would need to apply before it is too late
  30.  
  31. >If he could learn to stand for himself and make some friends by the time school ended, then lonelyness would be over
  32. >If not, he wouid be doomed
  33. >to remain a racist for all time.
  34.  
  35. >As the hours passed,
  36. >he fell into despair and lost all hope,
  37. >for who could ever learn
  38. >to befriend a racist?
  39.  
  40. http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=Mx1MmY1Bb50
  41. >Little school, it's a quiet place
  42. >Every day like the one before
  43. >Little school, full of little students
  44. >Waking up to say...
  45. >There goes my sister with her friends, like always
  46. >The same old activities to try
  47. >Every morning just the same
  48. >Since the morning that we came
  49. >To this poor provincial school
  50. >B:Good morning, Rarity
  51. >R:Morning, Braeburn
  52. >B:Where you off to?
  53. >R:I'm looking for FluttershyThe bookshop. I just watched the most romantic story about a princess and an ogre and...
  54. >B:That's nice. Would you like to hang out with me this saturday?
  55. >*Rarity walks away from him
  56. >Look, there she goes
  57. >The girl is popular, no question
  58. >Classy and charming, can't you tell?
  59. >Always center of a crowd
  60. >Is being like her allowed?
  61. >Many girls in here want to be Rarity
  62. >Hello
  63. >Good day
  64. >How is your family?
  65. >Hi there
  66. >Good day
  67. >How is your life?
  68. >Made it on time
  69. >you almost didn't
  70. >There must be more than this provincial life
  71. >F:Rarity
  72. >R:Good morning. here's the series I borrowed
  73. >F:Finished already?
  74. >R:Of course. Have you got anything new?
  75. >F:Not since yesterday
  76. >R:That's all right. I'll borrow this one
  77. >F:That one? But you've seen it twice
  78. >R:Well, it's my favorite. Far-off places, daring sword fights, magic spells, a prince in disguise
  79. >F:If you like it all that much, it's yours
  80. >R:But...
  81. >F:I insist
  82. >R:Well, thank you. Thank you very much
  83. >Look, there she goes
  84. >That girl is so notorious
  85. >I wonder if she'll go out with me
  86. >With a pretty, Ideal look
  87. >Up with you, she will not hook
  88. >Dreamlike to the rest of us is her
  89. >Isn't this amazing?
  90. >It's my favorite show
  91. >Because you'll see
  92. >Here's where she meets
  93. >Prince Charming
  94. >But she won't discover that it's him
  95. >untill the end
  96. >Now it's no wonder
  97. >that she's called a beauty
  98. >Her looks have got no parallel
  99. >On top of that fair facade
  100. >Her heart shines like a gem
  101. >Very different from the rest of us
  102. >She's nothing like the rest of us
  103. >Yes, different from the rest of us is her
  104.  
  105. >Snips: Wow! You didn't miss a shot, Brad.
  106. >Snails:You're the greatest player in the whole world!
  107. >Brad: I know.
  108. >Snails: No team alive stands a chance against you.
  109. >Snips: And no girl, for that matter.
  110. >Brad: It's true, Guys. And I've got my sights set on that one.
  111. >Snips and Snails: The fashion girl?
  112. >Brad: She's the one.The lucky girl I'm going to fuck.
  113. >Snails: But she...
  114. >Brad: The most beautiful girl in town.
  115. >Snips: I know, but...
  116. >Brad: That makes her the best. And don't I deserve the best?
  117. >Snails: Well, of course. I mean, you do.
  118. >*Brad sings
  119. >Right from the moment
  120. >when I met her, saw her
  121. >I said she's gorgeous, and I fell
  122. >Here in town there's only she
  123. >Who is beautiful as me
  124. >So I'm making plans to woo and make her mine.
  125. >*end of Brad's solo
  126. >Look, there he goes
  127. >Isn't he dreamy?
  128. >He's Brad, the one
  129. >Oh, he's so cute
  130. >Be still, my heart
  131. >I'm hardly breathing
  132. >He's such a tall, dark, strong and handsome jock
  133. >hello
  134. >Good day
  135. >You call this homework?
  136. >What lovely legs
  137. >Say cheese
  138. >Ten bucks
  139. >Brad: Excuse me
  140. >I'll get a break
  141. >Brad:Please let me through
  142. >I'm almost there
  143. >Those fish, they smell
  144. >I'm very sorry
  145. >Rarity:There must be more than this provincial life
  146. >Brad: Just watch, I'm going to make her my gal
  147.  
  148. >Look, there she goes
  149. >a girl who's loved and envied
  150. >A most admired lovely doll
  151. >It's sad but also true
  152. >That she won't go out with you
  153. >Cause she really is a classy girl
  154. >A beauty and a classy girl
  155. >She really is a classy girl
  156. >Rarity!
  157.  
  158. >Being Rarity
  159. >I'm almost sure I heard some people singing behind my back. I wonder why I also sang with them, I even think that I started it
  160. >"Hello Rarity"
  161. >A guy's voice interrupts my thoughts; It's Brad
  162. >"Hello Brad, how are you?" I spoke as politely as I could; after all, even though he is being a bother I shouldn't stop being a lady
  163. >"I feel bradical" How can someone use that as a word? "specially now that you are here. how are you?"
  164. >Oh, bother
  165. >"I'm very well, thank you" I replied "now that our conversation is over, would you kindly step aside and let me through?"
  166. >Okay, that wasn't very friendly on my behalf but that bradical word is jus obnoxious
  167. >"So, I wonder" it seems he won't let me through "have you got a boyfriend yet?"
  168. >The nerve some people have "no, not yet; I guess some people are better off alone"
  169. >"Rarity," he began a speech "it's about time you stopped acting like a prude and paid attention to more important things" what can be more important than respecting myself? "Like me"
  170. >You can't be serious "The whole town's talking about it" Is there no way to silence him? "It's not right for a girl like you to spend your days alone; Specially when a guy like me can make her company" I can't take it anymore
  171. >"Oh Brad, I'm certainly not deserving of your company" I clearly do not deserve such suffering
  172. >"Why, thank you, Rarity" it seems my choice of words was not the wisest
  173. >"What do you say you and me take a walk to my home this afternoon and take a look at my trophies?" he finally made his request, time to turn him down
  174. >"Maybe some other time" I answered "now, may you please let me through? I want to go greet Twilight"
  175.  
  176. >One of the boys who were with Brad, Snips I think said "That crazy horse girl?" then his friend Snails added "I heard she scaped from an asylum"
  177. >These two fellows really make me lose my cool
  178. >"Don't talk about her that way" I yell in anger
  179. >"Yeah! Don't talk about her friend that way" Brad says; it would have been moving if he wasn't chuckling between words
  180. >"she's not crazy, she's just having adaptational problems" I scream
  181. >Suddenly, a loud crash is heard
  182. >It's Twilight colliding with a door
  183. >I run past the laughing trio towards my friend
  184. >"Twilight? How on earth did that happen?" I ask. I'm worried because it seems like it hurts a lot
  185. >"Why won't this door move" she says while rubbing her face
  186. >"Are you all right, my dear? You are supposed to pull that door" I simply couldn't stop myself from stating the obvious
  187. >"I did just that, but my magic didn't work" she speaks in all seriousness
  188. >I guess I'll ignore her previous comment
  189. >"You must pull the HANDle with your hands" I tell her
  190. >"Understood, it won't happen again" is her answer.
  191. >Sometimes I can't understand her, didnt they have normal doors in the place she's form? Maybe there were only automatic doors over there; Iguess it must be hard to get used to manually open doors if you only know about automatic doors
  192.  
  193. >"So, how's everything going?" she asks me as if nothing happened
  194. >"Same as always, but some guys have been trying to make advances on me since I put a foot in the school today" I answer her question and ask one too
  195. >"Do you think I'm too much of a prude?
  196. >"Of course no, why are you askiing me that?" She asks
  197. >"It's just that I haven't yet found a gentleman deserving of my attention" I complain
  198. >"What about Brad? he seems to be a good and handsome guy" how can you even think of suggesting that?
  199. >"Well, he's handsome, all right, but he's also a narcissistic scatterbrain; he's definitely not the one for me"
  200. >"Well, don't you worry. you'll surely find Your ideal man some day" she speaks "well, I guess it's time for class, see you later"
  201. >"See you, and remember to use your hands to open doors" I hope she's okay, today that racist kid from yesterday will start going to class or so I heard I hope he doesn't do anything to her, I wouldn't be able to help her as I'm not on her class.
  202. >Why must I be in Brad's class?
  203.  
  204. >Being Twilight
  205. >A young man I had never seen before sits by my side and talks to me. He's the first human who listens to my whole story, he must be the nicest person I've ever met
  206. >he remains totally silent during my whole speech, he doesn't say a word unless I ask him. If he wasn't such a good guy, I would say he was ignoring me
  207.  
  208. >Being Rarity
  209. >Class is finally over, so I make my way to Twilight's class; I'm worried about that racist kid
  210. >As I walk there, somthing stops me on my tracks. It's Brad
  211. >"Brad, what a pleasant surprise" I shouldn't stop being a lady just because I don't like him
  212. >"Isn't it, though?" he says "I'm just full of surprises" oh really?
  213. >"You know, Rarity, there's not a girl in town who wouldn't love to be in your shoes. This is the day your dreams come true"
  214. >"What do you know about my dreams, Gaston?" I reply trying not to show my annoyance
  215. >"Plenty! Here. Picture this" Oh god, he won't be saying this seriously, right?
  216. >"Me walking side by side with my gal being the most popular and beautiful couple in town and the envy of all the onlookers.Imagine that"
  217. >"Do you know who that gal will be?" he asks as if this was the best pickup line ever
  218. >"Let me think" I answer, not even trying to hide my sarcastic tone
  219. >"You, Rarity" Oh, come on! this is not romantic at all how can you be such a brute
  220. >"Brad, I'm... I'm speechless. I really don't know what to say" I say while trying to distance myself from him
  221. >"Say you'll be mine" He says while moving his face near mine. It seems he wants to kiss me, as he closes his eyes whil approaching me
  222. >"I'm very sorry, Brad, but..." I dodge his try of catching me between his arms while accidentally tripping him "But I just don't deserve you!"
  223. >He fell into a trash bin that was behind me. Everybody laughed but I feel a bit guilty, Even though her deserves the punishment.
  224. >Anyways, I'm off to find Twilight
  225.  
  226. >On my way to Twilight's class I was immersed in my thoughts
  227. >Can you imagine?
  228. >He asked me to marry him.
  229. >Me, the wife of that boorish, brainless...
  230. >*singing* http://youtu.be/Mx1MmY1Bb50?t=4m47s
  231. >The gal of Brad
  232. >Can't you just see it?
  233. >The gal of Brad
  234. >His trophy girl
  235. >No, sir, not me, I guarantee it
  236. >I want much more than this provincial life
  237. >I want a romance with a gentle fellow
  238. >I want it more than I can tell
  239. >And for once it might be grand
  240. >To have someone understand
  241. >I want so much more than they've got planned
  242. >*singing end*
  243. >How come no one reacted to that? and why did I even start singing?
  244. >Twilight comes into my sight. She seems happier than usual.
  245. >"Hi Twilight, how did your classes go?" I ask my smiling friend, knowing that it all went well from her expresion
  246. >"You won't believe it," she says "I met the nicest guy ever, he talked to me in class, and then he listened to all I had to say about equestria. He's the first one to not laugh when I tell my story"
  247. >My dear, he must have just laughed behind your back. I won't tell her that though because she seems very happy right now
  248. >"So, who was this kind guy?" I asked, to make sure the guy wasn't some kind of playboy or something
  249. >"His name is Norman," she answers
  250. >"Norman, huh?" the name doesn't ring any bells though I think I've heard it before "well Twilight, I hope you can present me to your friend some day"
  251. >"Of course, It'll be a pleasure" Twilight's eyes shine as she speaks
  252. >The guy she met must be quite the gentleman, to have this girl talking about him as if he was the second coming of Christ
  253. >I hope this man is actually what my friend thinks of him, I don't want to see her get sad because of some lecher
  254. >So you better watch out Norman, for I'll take care of you if I ever see you making her cry
  255.  
  256. >Some days later
  257. >I find Twilight in the cafeteria speaking to a guy I've never seen before; that must be her friend
  258. >"Hello Twilight, who's your friend?" I ask her with genuine interest
  259. >"Hi, Rarity!" Twilight says "look, this is my friend Norman"
  260. >Just giving him a quick glance I notice that his fashion sense is outdated for almost 30 years. I raise an eyebrow, however I shouldn't judge people based on their appearance
  261. >"Hello Norman, my name is Rarity" I say "it's a pleasure to meet you"
  262. >"The pleasure is all mine" he says that while putting a face that looks as if he had never seen a girl before. I guess this guy won't be a problem to Twilight
  263. >"Twilight, come here for a bit!" a voice calls Twilight; it's Pinkie's and I'm left alone with Norman, this may become awkward
  264. >"So, how did you guys meet?" I ask him
  265. >"I sat next to her and she told me she was new in the school too. Then things just arranged themselves in a way in wich she has been with me most of the time at school"
  266. >He speaks of her as if she was just following him instead of actually being a friend
  267. >But as I keep talking to him, I notice he seems to be a nice fellow and a good listener; just as twilight described him
  268. >I think he could be a very good friend
  269. >"Well, I've got to go" I say good bye, because time passed very quickly and it was already late "see you later Norman"
  270. >when I left the cafeteria, I heard some people shouting "Look at this racist pig going after the whitest girl in town"
  271. >I wonder what they meant by that. Norman can't possibly be the racist guy, and he didn't seem that interested in me; though he looked a little shy during our conversation
  272.  
  273. Being Twilight
  274.  
  275. >One day I asked Norman about how humans mate for a homework, also because of curiosity (see oneshots lines 75-101)
  276. >He's really helpful as he did his best at helping me look for information
  277.  
  278. Being Rarity
  279.  
  280. >One week later, I see Norman alone in the cafeteria
  281. >Is Twilight his only friend?
  282. >Why not make him a bit of company?
  283. >We begin to chat again, just like in the previous week. I feel as if we could converse forever if time wasn't a limit
  284. >After a while Twilight comes next to us
  285. >She seems to be sneaking behind him, will she give him a scare?
  286. >Go on, I'll keep him distracted for you
  287.  
  288. Being Twilight
  289.  
  290. >Thanks to Norman I aced that homework, I just need to let him now about how grateful I am
  291. >I hug him from behind and say
  292.  
  293. Being Rarity
  294.  
  295. >Wow, Twilight is being pretty bold today, to give him a hug as a surprise, maybe she's fallen in love with him. It's very likely
  296. >I was ready to accept the begining of a new couple but then Twilight goes and says
  297.  
  298. >"THANK YOU, THANK YOU ABOUT HUMAN REPRODUCTION!"
  299.  
  300. >I close my eyes in meditation
  301. >Calm down Rarity, there's surely an explanation to this, maybe it was homework. Also if they love each other that's none of your bussiness.
  302. >When I open my eyes I see how Twilight and Norman look at me in silence. I look at my hand and notice that I spilled my drink in Norman's face
  303. >Tears begin to form in my eyes so I leave the place before I start crying in public
  304. >What could have made me lose my composture in this way
  305. >I can only hear laughs comming from the cafeteria.
  306. >They must think I was jealous of Twilight or something; but that's not what happened at all, I just don't know what drove me to that
  307. >But I regret talking to Norman today
  308.  
  309.  
  310. Being Brad
  311.  
  312. >I've been feeling down for some weeks, so I got some friends to organize a party to cheer me up
  313. >However I can't stop thinking about Rarity
  314. >"Who does she think she is?" I say aloud "That girl has tangled with the wrong man. No one says no to the Brad"
  315. >"Darn right" says snips trying to cheer me up
  316. >But my complaints keep going "Dismissed. Rejected. Publicly humiliated"
  317. >"Why, it's more than I can bear"
  318. >"More punch?" offers Snails
  319. >"What for? Nothing helps" I reply "I'm disgraced"
  320. >"Who, you? Never" the both of them say in unison
  321. >Brad, you've got to pull yourself together.
  322.  
  323. >*Singing*
  324. http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=PK3x2DOoJIc
  325. >Snips:Gosh, it disturbs me to see you, my chum Looking so down in the dumps
  326. >Snails: Every guy here'd love to be you, dear bro. Even when taking your lumps
  327. >Snips: There's no man in town as admired as you. You're everyone's favorite guy
  328. >Snails: Everyone's awed and inspired by you
  329. >Both: And it's not very hard To see why
  330. >No one's slick as our Brad
  331. >No one's quick as our Brad
  332. >No one's neck's as incredibly thick as our Brad
  333. >For there's no man in town half as manly Perfect, a pure paragon
  334. >You can ask any
  335. >Tom, Dick or Stanley
  336. >And they'll tell you
  337. >whose team they prefer to be on
  338. >No one's been like our Brad
  339. >A kingpin like our Brad
  340. >No one's got a swell cleft
  341. >in his chin like our Brad
  342. >Brad:As a specimen, yes, I'm intimidating
  343. >My, what a guy, that Brad is
  344. >Give five hurrahs
  345. >Give 12 hip-hips
  346. >Brad is the best
  347. >and the rest is all drips
  348. >No one fights like the Brad
  349. >Douses lights like the Brad
  350. >In a wrestling match
  351. >nobody bites like the Brad
  352. >For there's no one
  353. >as burly and brawny
  354. >As you see, I've got biceps to spare
  355. >Not a bit of him scraggly or scrawny
  356. >That's right
  357. >Brad:And every last inch of me's covered with SWAG
  358. >No one hits like the Brad
  359. >Matches wits like the Brad
  360. >In a spitting match
  361. >nobody spits like the Brad
  362. >Brad: I'm especially good at expectorating
  363. >Ten points for the Brad
  364. >Brad: When I was a lad
  365. >Brad: I ate four dozen eggs
  366. >Brad: Every morning to help me get large
  367. >Brad: And now that I'm grown
  368. >Brad: I eat five dozen eggs
  369. >Brad: So I'm roughly the size of a barge
  370. >No one shoots like The Brad
  371. >Makes those beauts like The Brad
  372. >Then goes tromping around
  373. >wearing boots like The Brad
  374. >I use trophies in all of my decorating
  375. >My, what a guy
  376. >The Brad
  377. >*singing ends*
  378. >Bradical I didn't know we could sing this good
  379. >All that singing does wonders to your emotional state
  380. >I sit down to rest from the unexpected musical performance
  381. >My rest allows me to catch a glimpse of the latest rumors in school
  382. >"That crazy horse girl was riding on the racist the other day"
  383. >"I heard Rarity Spilled her drink on those perverts when they were making out in front of her"
  384. >many rumors concerning that crazy horse girl came to my ears
  385. >"I loved when she was constantly crashing with doors"
  386. >"That Crazy horse girl is always good for a laugh.
  387. >as I heard of her shenanigans I began to ponder
  388. >Crazy horse girl?
  389. >Crazy horse girl
  390. >*singing* http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=5f3hFq2crOo
  391. >Brad: Guys, I'm afraid I've been thinking
  392. >SnipSnails: A dangerous pastime
  393. >Brad:I know
  394. >But that Crazy horse girl
  395. >is her dear friend
  396. >And her common sense's only so-so
  397. >Now, the wheels in my head
  398. >have been turning
  399. >Since I thought of that weird loony girl
  400. >See, I promised myself
  401. >Rarity would be mine
  402. >And right now, I'm evolving a plan
  403.  
  404. >Brad:If I...
  405. >SnipSnails: Yes?
  406. >Brad:Then we...
  407. >SnipSnails: No, would she?
  408. >Brad: Guess.
  409. >SnipSnails: Now we get it!
  410. >Brad: Let's go!
  411. >SnipSnails: Let's go!
  412.  
  413. >No one plots like The Brad
  414. >Takes cheap shots like The Brad
  415. >Plans to persecute harmless crackpots
  416. >like The Brad
  417. >So, his new girlfriend
  418. >soon he will be Fucking
  419. >My, what a guy
  420. >The Brad
  421.  
  422. Being Norman (Finally)
  423.  
  424. >Goddamnit Purple why do you hate me so much
  425. >I swear, if you weren't the only one who speaks to me on a daily basis I'd have told you to fuck off
  426. >But it seems The Aryan Beauty is angry with the both of us, not just me; thus, I must put my hands on the issue and help Purple reconcile with my princess
  427. >"Hey Purple cheer up," I say "We'll find a way to get you to make up with Aryan"
  428. >Out of nowhere comes Pink appears "Let's make a dinner party, if it's classy enough, Rarity is bound to love it and she will surely forgive you anything"
  429. >The rose colored girl has been a friend of The Aryan Beauty for a long time, so we now we can trust her words
  430. >The three of us organize a classy dinner, Pink will cook, while purple and I act as the waiters.
  431. >At night Pink invited The Aryan Beauty to have dinner at her home without telling her that we would be there
  432. >As The Beauty approached the dinner table lights went out and a stage light reavealed Purple and me in the room
  433. >"Rarity" Purple spoke "we're very sorry about what happened today, though I dont get what bothered you, I'm still sorry"
  434. >"Aryan Beauty," My turn came "as an apology, we will humbly serve you this night"
  435. >Music started sounding out of nowhere
  436. >Norman:
  437. >Ma chere mademoiselle
  438. >It is with deepest pride
  439. >and greatest pleasure
  440. >that we welcome you tonight.
  441. >And now, we invite you to relax.
  442. >Let us pull up a chair,
  443. >as the dining room proudly presents
  444. >your dinner.
  445. >*singing* http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=afzmwAKUppU
  446. (No changes in the song because this time)
  447. >After the show, we heard The Aryan Beauty's aproval "Bravo! That was wonderful"
  448. >"Thank you" Purple and I reply
  449. >the Aryan Beauty talks again "I wanted to apologize because nothing could ever justify what I did to you"
  450. >"Worry not" I said "that is already on the past"
  451. >On the folowing weeks, The Aryan Beauty not only hanged out Purple But she also spent a lot of time with me
  452. >Thank you so much Pink and Purple
  453.  
  454. Being Brad
  455.  
  456. >I've plotted a great plan to make Rarity mine
  457. >For that I'll use that crazy horse girl and her racist friend
  458. >"Snips, You'll Kidnap the horsefucker" I start giving orders "Snails, find a way to pin it on the racist guy"
  459. >"Once all that is done, I'll beat the crap out of that racist and I'll look as a hero to Rarity"
  460. >"No one will care about what happens to the racist" Snails says
  461. >"And no one will believe he's innocent" Snips adds
  462. >"You plan is foolproof" both of the say
  463. >"That's exaxtly why I'm letting you participate
  464. >"You rock Brad" they say as they take their leave
  465. >For now, I'll just sit and wait
  466.  
  467. Being Rarity
  468.  
  469. >After apologizing to Twilight, our relationship went back to how it should be
  470. >On Norman. Well, let's say we have become friends in these past few days
  471. >I've hung out with him a lot
  472. >I know now that he is the one who the school calls a racist, I'm aware that isn't true
  473. >Today, Pinkie, Twilight, Norman and me, are going to have walk on the park and a picnic
  474. >When I get to the`park, Norman is there, but there's no sign of Twilight or Pinkie
  475. >We wait for half an hour
  476. >"It doesn't seem they'll come" Norman says "should we Proceed with our walk, just the two of us?"
  477. >"Yes, why not?" I replied
  478. >We then started moving while chatting
  479. >This may be a good day
  480.  
  481.  
  482. Hi, I'm Pinkie, how are you? (you are not supposed to actually speak in this space)
  483. Oh, Okay
  484.  
  485. >I'm supposed to go for a walk and a picnic with my friends
  486. >But after thinking for a while, a funnier idea came to my mind
  487. >I can see that Normy has taken a liking to my little Rarity, so lets geive him a little push
  488. >Speaking of the devil, there they are. I guess its better to leave them alone, they look so cute together
  489. >I'm watching this until the end
  490. >They walk arround just talking while keeping their distance. It looks as if they will not make any progress, maybe if they spend enough time alone they will get the courage to take the next step
  491. >During the love walk, I see Twilight
  492. >"Rarity, Norman Over..." Before she could finish her greeting I tackled her and hid ourselves behind a bush"
  493.  
  494. Being Norman
  495.  
  496. >I think I heard Purple, but when I looked in the direction of her voice I didn't see a thing
  497. >Maybe I've been hanging around with her so much that I'm starting to have hallucinations
  498.  
  499. Pinkie here again. So as I was saying, I tackled twilight and (Pinkie, please narrate in the green sections only)
  500. okey dokey lokey (...)
  501.  
  502. >"Pinkie why are you doing this?"
  503. >"Shhhhhhh, don't let them see you, look at how happy they are" I say while pointing Norman and Rarity
  504. >"You're right" says Twilight "they look so happy that they may start singing"
  505. >Some music starts playing out of nowhere, I definitely have to learn how to do that
  506.  
  507. >*Singing* http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=3ysRm_C56UM
  508. >Rarity:
  509. >There's something sweet
  510. >and almost kind
  511. >But he was mean
  512. >and he was coarse and unrefined
  513. >And now he's dear and so unsure
  514. >I wonder why
  515. >I didn't see it there before
  516.  
  517. >Norman
  518. >She glanced this way
  519. >I thought I saw
  520. >And when we touched
  521. >she didn't shudder at my hand
  522. >No, it can't be
  523. >I'll just ignore
  524. >But then she's never looked at me
  525. >that way before
  526.  
  527. >Rarity:
  528. >New and a bit alarming
  529. >Who'd have ever thought
  530. >That this could be
  531. >True. That he's no Prince Charming
  532. >But there's something in him
  533. >That I simply didn't see
  534.  
  535. >Pinkie and Twilight alternating verses:
  536. >Well, who'd have thought
  537. >Well, bless my soul
  538. >Well, who'd have known
  539. >Well, who, indeed
  540. >And who'd have guessed
  541. >they'd come together on their own
  542. >It's so peculiar. Wait and see
  543.  
  544. >Both: We'll wait and see
  545. >A few days more
  546. >There may be something there
  547. >that wasn't there before
  548.  
  549. >Pinkie:You know, perhaps there is something
  550. >there that wasn't there before
  551.  
  552. >Twilight: There may be something there
  553. >that wasn't there before
  554.  
  555. >*song end*
  556.  
  557. >"I can't believe they sang all that and are not kissing right now" I say
  558. >"It seems they didn't listen to each other's part of the song" says Twilight
  559. >"How is that even possible, are you nuts writefag?" I ask
  560. (Pinkie stop breaking the 4th wall)
  561. >"What is a writefag?" Twilight asks
  562. >"Um, let's not worry about that and keep watching the lovebirds" I answer
  563. >Right after I said that, I see Norman approaching Rarity
  564. >It's time!
  565. >"Aryan Beauty" he says. Can't he call her Rarity? not even this time, I mean...(the rest of Pinkie's complain has been omitted for storytelling reasons)
  566. >(Norman continues his speech unaware of my discusion with his pink friend)
  567. >"May my humble self treat your magnificence to dinner tonight?" wow, that sure was corny (by the way, this is Pinkie)
  568. >"I'd be delighted my courteous gentleman" both of them laughed.
  569. >It seems they were just playing around. I'm seriously disappointed Norman; this was the time to man up
  570. >"Might this generous proposition be considered as a date?" Oooooooooooooooooooooh, she said it, I cant believe it. Now norman, be a man and say yes
  571. >"My lady," He says "It is an honor for my lowly self that you regard a date as a posibility. Therefore..."
  572. >Say it, Say it, Say it
  573. >"It's my commitment and my desire to take your Aryan Beauty"
  574. >"He said it!!! he finally said it" Twilight and I yell as quietly as possible, in order to not be discovered and keep watching the potential couple
  575. >"This must have been the cheesiest invitation to a date that has ever been made; but still, he did it"
  576. >"And the date is tonight Twilight we've gotta go and watch"
  577. >"I don't think I'll go, we shouldn't bother them that much" Twilight says "I'll wait until Norman or Rarity tell me about all this" she has a point, but I'm still going to watch
  578. >After that, Norman walked Rarity home and waited till she closed the door to start his way home
  579. >It seems he's Rarity's type
  580. >Everything's gonna be alright
  581.  
  582.  
  583. Being Norman
  584.  
  585. >I can't believe how quickly it all developed
  586. >But here I am, about to have a date with The one and only Aryan Beauty
  587. >I somehow booked a fancy restaurant with the little time I had
  588. >Got my best clothes and went to her place
  589. >I am now at her door. Let's take a deep breath and calm down before knocking
  590. >Then she opens the door, the most beautiful being in this world, and she was waiting for me
  591. >"Shall we go now?" she asked
  592. >"Your wish is my command"
  593. >We walked towards the restaurant while people turned around to look at us, especifically they wanted to see The Aryan Beauty
  594. >She was the very definition of elegance
  595. >wearing a fancy dress she moves gracefully, her walking motion is similar to a carefully planned choreography all around her was a fancy harmony
  596. >"I must say that you look stunning" I say while trying to look cool
  597. >"Why, thank you" she says "it means a lot coming from you"
  598. >We arrive to the restaurant, we have a delicious dinner while we have a wonderful conversation
  599. >the date is perfect
  600.  
  601. Pinkie Pie here
  602.  
  603. >Of course I'm watching every single detail of this date
  604. >Norman and Rarity look very good together; it seems she finally found her prince
  605. >I'm so happy I could sing right now
  606. >*Music starts out of nowhere
  607. >Oh yeah, I did it!
  608.  
  609. >*Singing* http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=9qtTPTxvoPA
  610.  
  611. >Pinkie:
  612. >Tale as old as time
  613. >True as it can be
  614. >Barely even friends
  615. >Then somebody bends
  616. >Unexpectedly
  617. >Just a little change
  618. >Small to say the least
  619. >Both a little scared
  620. >Neither one prepared
  621. >Beauty and and Racist
  622. >Everjust the same
  623. >Ever a surprise
  624. >Ever as before
  625. >Everjust as sure
  626. >As the sun will rise
  627. >Tale as old as time
  628. >Tune as old as song
  629. >Bittersweet and strange
  630. >Finding you can change
  631. >Learning you were wrong
  632. >Certain as the sun
  633. >Rising in the east
  634. >Tale as old as time
  635. >Song as old as rhyme
  636. >Beauty and Racist
  637. >Tale as old as time
  638. >Song as old as rhyme
  639. >Beauty and Racist
  640.  
  641. >*song end*
  642.  
  643. Pinkie Pie here
  644.  
  645. >They are having a great time it seems
  646. >Once dinner was over, the potential couple took a walk; Norman, being the gentleman he is, lends his jacket to Rarity because it is a very cold night, specially for her because she's wearing just a dress
  647. >During their walk some girls from school saw them
  648. >"It seems we are looking at white supremacy here" says one of them
  649. >"So miss perfection is a racist too, this must be known by the school" says other one
  650. >"Rarity's time as the most perfect girl is now over" another one says
  651. >It seems they are envious of her
  652. >Girls can be very evil some times
  653.  
  654. Being Norman
  655.  
  656. >"Aryan Beauty," I whisper with pain in my heart "I guess our first date is also our last one. I can't have you living under this stigma as have been doing"
  657. >"She's here with me because I deserve the purest of the aryans and the greatest of the beauties" I spoke to the group in front of us, digging my own grave but trying to save my goddess from this curse "I'm using her purple friend as a leverage to get her to do whatever I ask, or else..."
  658.  
  659. I'm Pinkie
  660.  
  661. >What are you even thinking Norman, you are making things worse
  662. >Suddenly I notice Snails is near them talking on his phone "We can pin it on Norman now, go get the girl"
  663. >I have a bad feeling about this
  664. >It seems Norman did his best to enrage the group of girls. They got so angry that their boyfriens who weren't that far from there are now chasing him
  665. >Rarity is now alone, so I go and make her company on her way home
  666. >"Everything was going so well" she says, with a disappointed look in her face
  667. >"Well Norman had his reasons it seems" I said trying to cheer her up "at the very least they won't be spreading rumors about you"
  668. >"But I don't care about those rumors" she says while tears form on her eyes
  669. >Norman, once I get Rarity to her home I'm coming after you
  670.  
  671. Being Norman
  672.  
  673. >I'm doing my best to outrun those faggots, I'd fight them but they are just too many I guess this'll be my last day with this face
  674. >As I was distracted I failed to notice an arm which popped out from an open door and took me inside the building as my chasers ran past me
  675. >It's Pink
  676. >"Oh, Pink" I say "you don't know how grateful I am, you really saved me here"
  677. >She slaps my face
  678. >"Why Norman, how could you do this?" she says "your date was going so well and then you ruin it because you decided to be a jerk to some random guys"
  679. >"You don't understand Pink, the constant harassment I receive every day is a heavy burden which I don't want The Aryan Beauty to carry" It seems I played the classy gentleman game too much today
  680. >"Why is that?" she asks
  681. >"Because I love her, and I don't want to be the cause of any harm that may come to her. Even if I have to increase my daily suffering"
  682. >"If she is happy and well, I will be too"
  683. >After that exchange of words Pink became silent, this is a miracle, but right now no miracle could lift my spirit
  684. >I walk Pink to her place and then I go to my home in order to rest from this bitter-sweet experience
  685. >This night is too cold to walk without a jacket
  686.  
  687. Being Brad
  688.  
  689. >Snips and Snails abducted Twilight last night and told me that the racist himself said, in front of some students of this school, that he was using her for his personal gain
  690. >Today I'll execute my plan, of saving Rarity's friend from that racist's claws. she'll be so thankful that she'll be mine
  691. >I made sure to spread the rumor of the horse girl disappearance, so everyone will pay attention to her absence
  692. >Then I'll blame the racist when classes are over
  693.  
  694. Being Norman
  695.  
  696. >I've decided to avoid the aryan beauty for the time being. I don't want people to associate her with the racist
  697. >But that's not my only worry. I haven't seen Purple during the whole day
  698. >Some people say she disappeared yesterday. Once classes are over I'll sweep the town looking for her. After all, she is one of my dear friends
  699.  
  700. Being Rarity
  701.  
  702. >I must return Norman's jacket, I'll use that chance to tell him that I don't care about what people say as long as we can continue being friends
  703. >But more importantly, I heard Twilight disappeared. We need to find her soon, I don't know what could happen to her if she is not with anyone of us
  704.  
  705. Being Norman
  706.  
  707. >Classes have finally ended
  708. >I run to leave the classroom classroom and the school
  709. >As I make my way outside I hear Brad say "Normy, Twily told me she's waiting for you in the library's balcony"
  710. >This fucker, I haven't spoken to him once and he's calling me Normy
  711. >But right now he's been a great help
  712. >"Thanks for being a bro" I say while making my way to the library
  713. >Our library has a balcony on the second floor, I wonder what's purple doing there; I hope she doesn't try to fly with her horse magic or something as dangerous as that
  714. >When I get to the balcony, I find no one and the door locks behind me. I have been tricked, what can Brad be planning?
  715.  
  716.  
  717. Pinkie here
  718.  
  719. >Twilight didn't come to school today, people say she's lost but I may know who's responsible for this and I'll make him speak
  720.  
  721. Being Rarity
  722.  
  723. >I hurry towards the school gate, I need to look for Twilight
  724. >On my way there I find a search party has been organized, by Brad no less
  725. >I didn't know he was knd enough to worry about her
  726. >However
  727. >"We know who made our friend Twilight Sparkle disappear" Brad says while surrounded by a crowd
  728. >"It was none other than our local racist Norman. He was using Twily in order to blackmail our poor Rarity and make her bend to his will"
  729. >"But yesterday he was discovered by a group of our classmates. As the blackmailing racist saw his plans foiled, he proceded with his crime of abducting Twily"
  730. >"Let's find him before his twisted mind finds a way to torture his victim"
  731. >"Norman is innocent!" I yell with all my strength
  732. >"But we all heard him yesterday" some people of the group said
  733. >"That wasn't true, he just said it to protect my reputation" I replied
  734. >"Then where's Twilight" demanded the crowd
  735. >"I know he didn't do it, even though you all think he's a racist, he's actually a kind and gentle person. He's my friend, and he would never do anything to hurt anyone" I said this while hugging Norman's jacket
  736. >"If I didn't know better," Brad says while taking the jacket out of my hands "I'd think you had feelings for this criminal"
  737. >"He's no criminal, Brad. You are!" I say, making sure everyone heard
  738. >"She's his accomplice" Brad shouted
  739. >"Norman will start blackmailing all of you
  740. >"He'll come and find your weaknesses"
  741. >"then he'll make you do his biddings"
  742. >"Unless we teach him a lesson, we'll never be safe"
  743. >"I say we beat him up!"
  744.  
  745. >*Singing* http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=xCENkwPiuU0
  746.  
  747. >We're not safe until he's dead
  748. >He'll come stalking us at night
  749. >Set to turns us into slaves
  750. >To his monstrous desires
  751. >He'll wreak havoc on our highschool
  752. >If we let him wander free
  753. >Brad: So, it's time to take some action, boys
  754. >It's time to follow me
  755.  
  756. >For our friends, for our school
  757. >for our families and teachers
  758. >It's a nightmare
  759. >but we must resort to this
  760. >Say a prayer, then we're there
  761. >In the library of this school
  762. >We have caught that
  763. >Evil mastermind
  764.  
  765. >A racist
  766. >He's got plans, very cunning
  767. >He'll use them to break our
  768. >Wills and hearts
  769. >Hear him roar, see him foam
  770. >But we're not coming home
  771. >Till he learns his lesson
  772. >Beat him up!
  773.  
  774. (speaking)
  775. >Rarity: No, I won't let you do this
  776. >Brad: If you're not with us, you're against us. Seize her!
  777. >Rarity: Get your hands off me!
  778. >Brad: We can't have her running off to warn the faggot (Rarity is locked in a classroom)
  779. >Rarity: Let me out!
  780. Brad: We'll rid the village of this racist! Who's with me?
  781. >Crowd:
  782. >I am!
  783. >I am!
  784. >I am!
  785.  
  786. >*Singing*
  787. >Crowd: We're enraged, we're outraged Light your torch, mount your horse
  788. >Brad:That racist'll learn about respect
  789. >Crowd: We're counting on our Brad
  790. >to lead the way
  791. >To the place with the books
  792. >where an evil motherfucker
  793. >Has been imprisoned
  794. >By the hero of aour town
  795.  
  796. >A Racist
  797. >Who is set to destroy us
  798. >We won't rest
  799. >till he's good and beaten
  800. >Sally forth, tally-ho
  801. >Go Brad go, beat him up
  802. >Praise the Lord and here we go
  803.  
  804. (speaking)
  805. >Brad: You'll cut his escape routes and I'll teach him a good lesson!
  806. >Rarity: I have to warn Norman, this is all my fault. what am I going to do?
  807. >Pinkie: Pinkie's here!
  808.  
  809. >*singing*
  810. >We don't like
  811. >Those who don't understand
  812. >and tolerate us
  813. >And this racist
  814. >is set on hating us all
  815. >He will cry and complain
  816. >but we won't care about that cause
  817. >We'll save our highschool and our lives
  818. >We'll beat him up
  819.  
  820. (speaking)
  821. >Norman: I knew it. I knew it was foolish to get my hopes up. Maybe it would have been better if I'd never spoken to her at all.
  822. >(Norman notices the crowd)
  823. >Hey guys, I'm stuck here, help me out!
  824.  
  825. >Crowd: we're beating your ass up racist!
  826. >Norman: damn it
  827.  
  828. >Rarity: Thanks for letting me out of there
  829. >Pinkie: Let's go find Twilight I know where she is! she's in Snips' house, but don't worry, she wasn't actually kidnapped. According to Snails she has been playing videogames non-stop since last night
  830. >Rarity: Twilight needs to be a bit more careful, but I'm relieved to know she's safe. Let's go find her, only she can stop all this madness
  831.  
  832. >Norman:I don't even care anymore, just come and get me if you want
  833.  
  834. >Brad: Close all the escape routes, his ass is mine! (no homo)
  835.  
  836. >*singing*
  837. >Rarity, Pinkie:
  838. >Here we go, Hurry up
  839. >We must quickly go find Twilight
  840. >Norman will be saved
  841. >Only in this way
  842.  
  843. >Crowd:
  844. >He won't dare get away
  845. >We are blocking all the exits
  846. >And if he comes within our sight
  847. >We'll beat him up
  848.  
  849. (speaking)
  850. (the girls have reached Snips' house)
  851. >Pinkie(screaming):Twilight come out!
  852. >Twilight:Leave me alone, I'm kicking his ass!
  853. >Rarity: Twilight Norman's in trouble!
  854.  
  855. >*singing*
  856. >Crowd: Beat him up! Beat him up!
  857.  
  858. (speaking)
  859. >Twilight: What happened to Norman?
  860. >Pinkie: The whole school thinks he kidnapped you, and will beat him up!
  861. >Rarity: Stop talking and keep running!
  862.  
  863. >*singing*
  864. >Crowd: Beat him up! Beat him up!
  865.  
  866. (speaking)
  867. >Norman (screaming): What's taking you so long? Come over here and try to beat me!
  868.  
  869. >*singing*
  870. >Crowd: Beat him up! Beat him up!
  871. >Beat him up!!!
  872.  
  873.  
  874. Being Norman
  875.  
  876. >I'm stuck in this balcony, A fall from here may or may not kill me, but it will surelly break some bones
  877. >I'm also surrounded by people to whom I have never done anything wrong but have decided that I deserve a beating
  878. >I'm not even scared. After what happened yesterday I guess it'd have been better to never have come to this school at all
  879. >I'll just let them beat me up, that way this nightmare may finally come to an end
  880. >The balcony's door opens. But there's not a crowd up here, the only one to come in is Brad
  881. >"So, here you are" he says "what a pleasant surprise"
  882. >"just get over with it" I say just not caring anymore
  883. >"I didn't come here just to play with you" he said while showing me something, it was my jacket "look at what my girl gave to me, she told me to wipe my ass with it"
  884. >"As if it wasn't enough with the linching now you come here with lies?" I say "The Aryan Beauty would never speak in that filthy way"
  885. >However, as the only way he could have obtained my jacket was through her, tears start forming in my eyes.
  886. >I don't let them fall though, I'm not giving him the satisfaction
  887. >Brad then starts punching and kicking me, his relentless attack, though heavy, is not enough to put me down so I just stand there and take it as a man as the multitude of students is watching and cheering for my assailant
  888. >He interrupts his attack to say "What's the matter, Normy? Too kind and gentle to fight back?"
  889. >He then grabs my shirt and seems to have the intention to send me flying towards the ground
  890.  
  891. >During this motion a loud scream is heard across the school
  892. >"No!"
  893. >I turned my head in the direction of the unmistakable sound "Aryan Beauty" I say
  894. >"No, Brad, don't" the sound of her voice is enough to make me regain my strength. She won't see me defeated
  895. >I plant my feet on the floor and punch my oponent on the gut
  896. >Brad gets winded by my punch, chance I use to take my distance
  897. >As the jock recovers he says "are you in love with her, Normy? Did you honestly think she'd want you when she had someone like me?"
  898. >His words strike me with a force superior to the one of all of his physical attacks combined; afterall, I'm just a normal fellow while he's the most admired and loved man in the school. The Aryan Beauty wouldn't suffer any kind of discrimination if he was the one at her side
  899. >I was paralyzed by my thoughts while he charged against me
  900. >"It's over, faggot! Rarity is mine!" he yelled during his charge
  901. >Before I could receive his attack, The Aryan Beauty crossed the door of the balcony, her presence there cleared my mind from doubts and made me regain my fighting spirit
  902. >Once Brad got into my arms' reach, I aplied an osotogari throw and prepared to kick his face in
  903. >"Let me go. Let me go Please, don't hurt me" the faggot cried as he was in my hands "I'll do anything. Anything!"
  904. >Seeing how desperate and helpless he was I just said "Leave us alone" and let lay him there
  905. >"Norman!" the voice of my love was calling to me and I had to answer so I looked away from my prey and looked at my beloved
  906. >"Aryan Beauty" I said, unable to hide my smile "You came back for me?"
  907. >I made some steps towards her and then I noticed Brad running past me "If she won't be mine, then she won't be anyone else's" he yelled as he charged in the direction of the one I love
  908. >In a split second I closed my distance with him and took him with me through the airs to the ground bellow the balcony, somehow we didn't die on impact and I didn't break any bones
  909. >As I lay on the ground besides the cause of today misfortune, The Aryan Beauty came to my side
  910. >"You came back for me?" I repeated my question
  911. >"Of course I came back" she said "I couldn't let them... This is all my fault. If only I'd gotten here sooner"
  912. >I can't bear to see her cry, so in my death bed I say "Maybe it's better... It's better this way"
  913. >"Don't talk like that" she says while still in tears "You'll be all right. We're together now. Everything's going to be fine, you'll see."
  914. >"At least I got to see you one last time" is what I manage to say as my conciousness starts to slowly fade out
  915. >"No. No." I can see her and hear her words but I'm unable to answer them "Please. Please. Please don't leave me"
  916. >Then the greatest miracle happens, Her beautiful mouth compels her melodious voice to utter three magical words
  917. >"I love you" is the final message she has for me. I can at least die as a happy man
  918. >But then, a lesser miracle occurs.
  919. >Purple could actually use magic as she claimed, and administered a healing spell on me and Brad, which returned us to a better state
  920. >"Rarity," I say her name even though im not used to it yet "please don't cry, I'm okay now"
  921. >Her tears don't stop flowing but her face is illuminated by a wide smile as she hugs me
  922. >"You are safe now" she says
  923. >Then our lips join to form a kiss
  924.  
  925. >After all this incident was over, Snips and Snails were severely punished by the school but they weren't expelled because they were manipulated by Brad
  926. >Brad on the other hand was enrolled into a correctional school due to planning an abduction and for trying to murder me and The Aryan Beauty. He could even go straight to jail once he comes of age
  927. >The aryan Beauty and I loved each other for the rest of our lives and lived happily ever after
  928.  
  929. *beep beep beep*
  930.  
  931. >"That must have been the weirdest dream I've ever had" I say as I woke up
  932. >Once I get to school, Vice-principal Luna gives me a Flyer for the musical theater club "You could even go to broadway" she says
  933. >"Okay" I answer pretty wierded out by the coincidence of my dream and this offer
  934. >"Norman" Puple calls me as soon as she gets to school "I'm sorry Norman"
  935. >"Why?" I asked
  936. >"Remember the spell we tried yesterday?" she answered my question with a question
  937. >"The One that didn't have any effect?" I replied in the same manner
  938. >"Yes," She finally gave me an actual answer "that spell broadcasted your dream to every tv in town last night"
  939. >"I'm so sorry" she said but I wasn't able to respond. I just stood there until classes were over
  940. >Goddamnit Purple
  941.  
  942. The Aryan Beauty and the racist - End
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