Shrek 2 (2004)

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Once upon a time
in a kingdom Far Far Away,

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the king and queen were blessed
with a beautiful baby girl.

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And throughout the land,
everyone was happy

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until the sun went down

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and they saw that their daughter was
cursed with a frightful enchantment

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that took hold each and every night.

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Desperate, they sought the help
of a fairy godmother

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who had them lock the
young princess away in a tower,

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there to await the kiss
of the handsome Prince Charming.

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It was he who would chance
the perilous journey

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through blistering cold
and scorching desert

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travelling for many days and nights,

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risking life and limb

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to reach the Dragon's Keep.

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For he was the bravest

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and most handsome

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in all the land.

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And it was destiny that his kiss

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would break the dreaded curse.

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He alone would climb to the highest
room of the tallest tower

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to enter the princess's chambers, cross
the room to her sleeping silhouette,

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pull back the gossamer curtains
to find her...

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What?

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- Princess Fiona?
- No!

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Oh, thank heavens. Where is she?

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- She's on her honeymoon.
- Honeymoon? With whom?

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It's so good to be home!

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Just you and me and...

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Donkey?

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Shrek! Fiona! Aren't you two
a sight for sore eyes!

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Give us a hug, Shrek,
you old love machine.

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And look at you, Mrs Shrek.
How about a side of sugar for the steed?

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Donkey, what are you doing here?

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I was just taking care
of your love nest for you.

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Oh, you mean like sorting the mail
and watering the plants.

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- Yeah, and feeding the fish!
-1 don't have any fish.

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You do now. I call that one Shrek
and the other Fiona.

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That Shrek is a rascally devil.
Get your...

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Will you look at the time.
I guess you'd better be going.

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Don't you want to tell me about your
trip? Or how about a game of Parcheesi?

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Actually, Donkey? Shouldn't you
be getting home to Dragon?

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Oh, yeah, that.

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I don't know.
She's been all moody and stuff lately.

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So I thought I'd
move back in with you guys.

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Well, you know we're always
happy to see you, Donkey.

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But Fiona and I are married now.

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We need a little time, you know,
to be together.

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Just with each other.

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Alone.

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Say no more.
You don't have to worry about a thing.

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I will always be here to make sure
nobody bothers you.

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- Donkey!
- Yes, roomie?

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You're bothering me.

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Oh, OK. All right, cool. I guess...

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Me and Pinocchio was gonna
try to catch a tournament, anyway,

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so maybe I'll see y'all Sunday
for a barbecue or something.

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He'll be fine.
Now, where were we?

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think I remember.

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Donkey!

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I know, I know! Alone!
I'm going! I'm going.

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But what do you want me
to tell these guys?

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Enough, Reggie.

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"Dearest Princess Fiona:

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You are hereby summoned
to the Kingdom of Far Far Away

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for a royal ball
in celebration of your marriage,

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at which time the King will
bestow his royal blessing

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upon you and your...

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...Prince Charming.

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Love, the King and Queen
of Far Far Away...

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...aka Mom and Dad."

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Mom and Dad?

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- Prince Charming?
- Royal ball? Can I come?

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- We're not going.
- What?

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I mean, don't you think
they might be a bit shocked

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to see you like this?

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Well, they might be a bit surprised.

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But they're my parents, Shrek.
They love me.

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And don't worry.
They're gonna love you, too.

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Yeah, right. Somehow I don't think
I'll be welcome at the country club.

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Will you stop it?
They're not like that.

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How do you explain Sergeant Pompous
and the Fancy Pants Club Band?

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Come on! You could at least
give them a chance.

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To do what? Sharpen their pitchforks?

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No! They just want
to give you their blessing.

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Oh, great. Now I need their blessing?

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If you want to be a part
of this family, yes.

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Who says I want
to be part of this family?

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You did! When you married me!

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Well, there's some fine print for you!

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So that's it. You won't come?

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Trust me. It's a bad idea.
We are not going! And that's final!

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Come on, Shrek!
We don't want to hit traffic!

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Don't worry!
We'll take care of everything.

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Hey, wait for me!

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All right, hit it!

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- Are we there yet?
- No.

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- Are we there yet?
- Not yet.

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- OK, are we there yet?
- No.

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- Are we there yet?
- No!

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- Are we there yet?
-Yes.

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- Really?
- No!

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- Are we there yet?
- No!

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- Are we there yet?
- No, we are not!

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- Are we there yet?
- No!

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- Are we there yet?
- Are we there yet?

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- Hey, that's not funny.
- That's not funny.

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- That's really immature.
- That's really immature.

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- This is why nobody likes ogres.
- ...why no one likes ogres.

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- All right! Your loss!
- ...your loss.

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- I'm gonna just stop talking.
- Finally!

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This is taking forever, Shrek.
There's no in-flight movie or nothing!

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The Kingdom of Far Far Away, Donkey.

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That's where we're going.
Far, far...

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...away!

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All right, all right, I get it.
I'm just so darn bored.

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Well, find a way to entertain yourself.

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For five minutes...

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Could you not be yourself
for five minutes!

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Are we there yet?

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-Yes!
- Oh, finally!

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It's going to be champagne wishes
and caviar dreams from now on.

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Hey, good looking!
We'll be back to pick you up later!

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Pantyhose!

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We are definitely not
in the swamp anymore.

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Hey, everyone, look!

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Hey, ladies! Nice day for a parade!
Yeah! You working that hat.

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Swimming pools! Movie stars!

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Announcing the long-awaited return

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of the beautiful Princess Fiona
and her new husband.

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Well, this is it.

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- This is it.
- This is it.

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"his is it.

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Why don't you guys go ahead?
I'll park the car.

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So, you still think this is a good idea?

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Of course! Look!
Mom and Dad look happy to see us.

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- Who on earth are they?
-1 think that's our little girl.

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That's not little!
That's a really big problem.

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Wasn't she supposed to kiss
Prince Charming and break the spell?

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00:14:03,551 --> 00:14:06,721
Well, he's no Prince Charming,
but they do look...

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Happy now?
We came. We saw them.

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00:14:10,683 --> 00:14:13,061
Now let's go before
they light the torches.

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- They're my parents.
- Hello? They locked you in a tower.

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Hey! That was for my own...

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Good! Here's our chance. Let's go
back inside and pretend we're not home.

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00:14:21,527 --> 00:14:23,154
Harold! We have to be...

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Quick! While they're not looking
we can make a run for it.

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Shrek, stop it! Everything's gonna be...

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A disaster! There is no way...

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- You can do this.
- But I really...

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- Really...
- Really!

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...don't... want... to... be...

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...here!

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Mom...

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Dad...

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I'd like you to meet my husband...

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...Shrek.

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Well...

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It's easy to see
where Fiona gets her good looks from.

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Excuse me.

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Better out than in,
I always say, eh, Fiona?

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That's good.

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I guess not.

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What do you mean, "not on the list?"
Don't tell me you don't know who I am.

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Hey! What's happening, everybody?
Thanks for waiting.

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I had the hardest time
finding this place.

166
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No! No! Bad donkey! Bad! Down!

167
00:15:56,539 --> 00:15:59,834
No, Dad! It's all right.
It's all right. He's with us.

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- He helped rescue me from the dragon.
- Yep, that's me: the noble steed.

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00:16:03,462 --> 00:16:05,423
Hey, waiter!
How about a bowl for the steed?

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Oh, boy.

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- Shrek!
- Yeah?

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00:16:11,387 --> 00:16:15,224
Oh, sorry! Great soup, Mrs Q.

173
00:16:16,100 --> 00:16:18,060
No, no. Darling.

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00:16:22,732 --> 00:16:26,360
So, Fiona, tell us about where you live.

175
00:16:26,527 --> 00:16:28,029
Well...

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Shrek owns his own land.

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- Don't you, honey?
- Oh, yes!

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It's in an enchanted forest...

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...abundant in squirrels

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and cute little duckies and...

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00:16:42,043 --> 00:16:44,670
What? I know you ain't
talking about the swamp.

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- Donkey!
- An ogre from a swamp. How original.

183
00:16:49,008 --> 00:16:52,637
Well, I suppose that would be
a fine place to raise the children.

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00:17:02,730 --> 00:17:05,816
It's a bit early to be
thinking about that, isn't it?

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00:17:05,983 --> 00:17:08,819
- Indeed. I just started eating.
- Harold!

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00:17:08,986 --> 00:17:12,073
- What's that supposed to mean?
- Dad. It's great, OK?

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00:17:12,240 --> 00:17:14,909
- For his type, yes.
- My type?

188
00:17:15,076 --> 00:17:16,369
I got to go to the bathroom.

189
00:17:16,535 --> 00:17:19,997
- Dinner is served!
- Never mind. I can hold it.

190
00:17:27,630 --> 00:17:29,173
Mexican food! My favourite.

191
00:17:29,340 --> 00:17:33,052
Well, let's not just sit here with
our tummies rumbling. Everybody dig in.

192
00:17:33,219 --> 00:17:34,512
Don't mind if I do, Lillian.

193
00:17:34,679 --> 00:17:38,432
So, I suppose any grandchildren
I could expect from you would be...

194
00:17:38,599 --> 00:17:40,393
Ogres, yes!

195
00:17:40,559 --> 00:17:43,896
Not that there's anything wrong
with that. Right, Harold?

196
00:17:44,063 --> 00:17:45,773
Oh, no! No! Of course, not!

197
00:17:45,940 --> 00:17:49,026
That is, assuming you don't
eat your own young!

198
00:17:49,193 --> 00:17:50,194
-Dad!
- Oh, no.

199
00:17:50,361 --> 00:17:54,615
We usually prefer the ones
who've been locked away in a tower!

200
00:17:54,782 --> 00:17:57,243
- Shrek, please!
-1 only did that because I loved her.

201
00:17:57,410 --> 00:18:00,413
Aye, day care
or dragon-guarded castle.

202
00:18:00,579 --> 00:18:02,582
You wouldn't understand.
You're not her father!

203
00:18:08,754 --> 00:18:11,591
It's so nice to have the family
together for dinner.

204
00:18:15,970 --> 00:18:17,221
- Harold!
- Shrek!

205
00:18:17,388 --> 00:18:18,306
- Fiona!
- Fiona!

206
00:18:18,472 --> 00:18:19,640
- Mom!
- Harold...

207
00:18:19,807 --> 00:18:21,726
Donkey!

208
00:19:44,308 --> 00:19:47,144
Oh, my dear. Oh, look at you.

209
00:19:47,311 --> 00:19:48,354
You're all...

210
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...grown up.

211
00:19:51,899 --> 00:19:54,944
- Who are you?
- Oh, sweet pea!

212
00:19:55,111 --> 00:19:56,987
I'm your fairy godmother.

213
00:19:57,154 --> 00:19:58,781
I have a fairy godmother?

214
00:19:59,907 --> 00:20:04,120
Now don't worry.
I'm here to make it all better.

215
00:20:04,286 --> 00:20:07,373
With just a...

216
00:21:08,976 --> 00:21:10,769
Stop!

217
00:21:11,228 --> 00:21:12,438
Look...

218
00:21:12,813 --> 00:21:15,649
Thank you very much,
Fairy Godmother,

219
00:21:15,816 --> 00:21:18,694
but I really don't need all this.

220
00:21:21,030 --> 00:21:23,949
- Fine. Be that way.
- We didn't like you, anyway.

221
00:21:24,742 --> 00:21:26,744
Fiona? Fiona?

222
00:21:30,789 --> 00:21:33,918
Oh! You got a puppy?
All I got in my room was shampoo.

223
00:21:35,753 --> 00:21:38,714
Fairy Godmother, furniture...

224
00:21:38,881 --> 00:21:41,217
I'd like you to meet my husband, Shrek.

225
00:21:41,383 --> 00:21:44,887
Your husband? What? What did
you say? When did this happen?

226
00:21:45,054 --> 00:21:46,680
Shrek is the one who rescued me.

227
00:21:46,847 --> 00:21:50,643
- But that can't be right.
- Oh, great, more relatives!

228
00:21:50,809 --> 00:21:52,520
She's just trying to help.

229
00:21:52,686 --> 00:21:55,814
Good! She can help us pack.
Get your coat, dear. We're leaving.

230
00:21:55,981 --> 00:21:57,483
- What?
- Leaving? I don't want to leave.

231
00:21:57,650 --> 00:21:59,026
When did you decide this?

232
00:21:59,193 --> 00:22:01,862
- Shortly after arriving.
- Look, I'm sorry...

233
00:22:02,029 --> 00:22:05,199
No, that's all right.
I need to go, anyway.

234
00:22:05,366 --> 00:22:08,702
But remember, dear.
If you should ever need me,

235
00:22:08,869 --> 00:22:11,705
happiness is just a teardrop away.

236
00:22:11,872 --> 00:22:14,375
Thanks, but we've got
all the happiness we need.

237
00:22:14,542 --> 00:22:16,210
Happy, happy, happy...

238
00:22:16,377 --> 00:22:18,045
So I see.

239
00:22:19,046 --> 00:22:20,381
Let's go, Kyle.

240
00:22:23,384 --> 00:22:25,052
- Very nice, Shrek.
- What?

241
00:22:25,219 --> 00:22:27,513
I told you coming here was a bad idea.

242
00:22:27,680 --> 00:22:29,890
You could have at least tried
to get along with my father.

243
00:22:30,057 --> 00:22:33,102
You know, somehow I don't think
I was going to get Daddy's blessing,

244
00:22:33,269 --> 00:22:34,562
even if I did want it.

245
00:22:34,728 --> 00:22:38,899
Well, do you think it might be nice
if somebody asked me what I wanted?

246
00:22:39,066 --> 00:22:41,485
Sure. Do you want me to pack for you?

247
00:22:41,861 --> 00:22:45,406
You're unbelievable!
You're behaving like a...

248
00:22:46,532 --> 00:22:49,410
- Go on! Say it!
- Like an ogre!

249
00:22:49,577 --> 00:22:50,911
Well, here's a news flash for you!

250
00:22:51,078 --> 00:22:54,999
Whether your parents like it or not...
I am an ogre!

251
00:23:00,754 --> 00:23:04,592
And guess what, Princess?
That's not about to change.

252
00:23:10,431 --> 00:23:14,560
I've made changes for you, Shrek.
Think about that.

253
00:23:16,437 --> 00:23:20,441
That's real smooth, Shrek.
"I'm an ogre!"

254
00:23:46,508 --> 00:23:49,678
-1 knew this would happen.
- You should. You started it.

255
00:23:49,845 --> 00:23:53,807
I can hardly believe that, Lillian.
Really! He's the ogre. Not me.

256
00:23:53,974 --> 00:23:57,311
I think, Harold, you're taking
this a little too personally.

257
00:23:57,478 --> 00:23:59,188
"his is Fiona's choice.

258
00:23:59,355 --> 00:24:02,983
Yes, but she was supposed to choose
the prince we picked out for her.

259
00:24:03,150 --> 00:24:07,237
I mean, you expect me to give
my blessings to this... this thing?

260
00:24:07,404 --> 00:24:11,283
Fiona does. And she'll
never forgive you if you don't.

261
00:24:11,450 --> 00:24:14,662
I don't want to lose
our daughter again, Harold.

262
00:24:16,121 --> 00:24:18,666
You act as if love
is totally predictable.

263
00:24:18,832 --> 00:24:21,543
Don't you remember
when we were young and...

264
00:24:21,710 --> 00:24:24,630
We used to walk
down by the lily pond and...

265
00:24:24,797 --> 00:24:27,925
- ...they were in bloom...
- Our first kiss.

266
00:24:28,092 --> 00:24:29,343
It's not the same!

267
00:24:29,510 --> 00:24:33,472
I don't think you realize that our
daughter has married a monster!

268
00:24:33,639 --> 00:24:35,849
Oh, stop being such a drama king.

269
00:24:36,016 --> 00:24:37,893
Fine! Pretend there's nothing wrong!

270
00:24:39,520 --> 00:24:43,190
Isn't it all wonderful! I'd like to know
how it could get any worse!

271
00:24:43,357 --> 00:24:45,150
- Hello, Harold.
- What happened?

272
00:24:45,317 --> 00:24:50,280
Nothing, dear! Just the old
hunting wound playing up a bit!

273
00:24:50,614 --> 00:24:53,450
I'll just stretch it
out here for a while.

274
00:24:53,617 --> 00:24:54,660
You better get in.

275
00:24:55,077 --> 00:24:56,537
We need to talk.

276
00:24:56,704 --> 00:24:59,206
Actually, Fairy Godmother,
just off to bed.

277
00:24:59,373 --> 00:25:02,459
Already taken my pills,
and they tend to make me a bit drowsy.

278
00:25:02,626 --> 00:25:06,505
So, how about...
We make this a quick visit. What?

279
00:25:07,756 --> 00:25:09,383
Oh, hello.

280
00:25:12,136 --> 00:25:13,679
So, what's new?

281
00:25:13,846 --> 00:25:16,724
You remember my son,
Prince Charming?

282
00:25:16,890 --> 00:25:21,061
Charming! Is that you? My gosh!
It's been years.

283
00:25:21,228 --> 00:25:23,230
When did you get back?

284
00:25:23,397 --> 00:25:26,358
Oh, about five minutes ago, actually.

285
00:25:26,525 --> 00:25:29,945
After I endured blistering winds,
scorching desert...

286
00:25:30,112 --> 00:25:33,073
I climbed to the highest room
in the tallest tower...

287
00:25:33,240 --> 00:25:35,534
Mommy can handle this.

288
00:25:35,701 --> 00:25:39,705
He endures blistering winds
and scorching desert!

289
00:25:39,872 --> 00:25:43,751
He climbs to the highest bloody room
of the tallest bloody tower...

290
00:25:43,917 --> 00:25:44,960
And what does he find?

291
00:25:45,127 --> 00:25:48,756
Some gender-confused wolf
telling him that his princess...

292
00:25:48,922 --> 00:25:50,716
- If I can just...
- ...is already married.

293
00:25:50,883 --> 00:25:53,260
It wasn't my fault.
He didn't get there in time.

294
00:25:53,427 --> 00:25:55,095
Stop the car!

295
00:25:56,889 --> 00:25:58,182
Harold...

296
00:25:59,600 --> 00:26:04,063
You force me to do something
I really don't want to do.

297
00:26:04,521 --> 00:26:05,939
Where are we?

298
00:26:06,106 --> 00:26:09,067
Well, hi. Welcome to Friar's Fat Boy!
May I take your order?

299
00:26:09,234 --> 00:26:12,613
My diet is ruined! I hope you're happy.

300
00:26:12,863 --> 00:26:16,158
OK... Two Renaissance Wraps,
no mayo... chilli rings...

301
00:26:16,325 --> 00:26:19,745
- I'll have the Medieval Meal.
- One Medieval Meal and, Harold,

302
00:26:19,912 --> 00:26:21,497
- curly fries?
- No, thank you.

303
00:26:21,663 --> 00:26:23,415
Sourdough soft taco, then?
What do you want?

304
00:26:23,582 --> 00:26:24,625
No, really, I'm fine.

305
00:26:24,792 --> 00:26:28,545
Your order, Fairy Godmother.
This comes with the Medieval Meal.

306
00:26:28,712 --> 00:26:29,880
Here you are, dear.

307
00:26:33,383 --> 00:26:37,137
We made a deal, Harold. I assume you
don't want me to go back on my part.

308
00:26:37,721 --> 00:26:39,306
Indeed not.

309
00:26:39,473 --> 00:26:42,976
So, Fiona and Charming will be together.

310
00:26:43,143 --> 00:26:46,980
-Yes.
- Believe me, Harold. It's what's best.

311
00:26:47,147 --> 00:26:49,316
Not only for your daughter...

312
00:26:50,609 --> 00:26:52,611
...but for your Kingdom.

313
00:26:57,199 --> 00:26:59,326
What am I supposed to do about it?

314
00:27:00,911 --> 00:27:02,871
Use your imagination.

315
00:27:41,201 --> 00:27:42,786
Come on in, Your Majesty.

316
00:28:03,390 --> 00:28:04,725
Excuse me.

317
00:28:04,892 --> 00:28:07,060
Do I know you?

318
00:28:07,227 --> 00:28:10,022
No, you must be mistaking me
for someone else.

319
00:28:10,188 --> 00:28:13,859
Excuse me.
I'm looking for the Ugly Stepsister.

320
00:28:16,695 --> 00:28:19,323
There you are. Right.

321
00:28:19,489 --> 00:28:23,702
You see, I need to
have someone taken care of.

322
00:28:24,286 --> 00:28:28,123
- Who's the guy?
- Well, he's not a guy, per se.

323
00:28:28,290 --> 00:28:30,083
He's an ogre.

324
00:28:32,920 --> 00:28:34,922
Hey, buddy, let me clue you in.

325
00:28:35,088 --> 00:28:39,134
There's only one fellow who can handle
a job like that, and, frankly...

326
00:28:39,301 --> 00:28:41,136
...he don't like to be disturbed.

327
00:28:41,303 --> 00:28:43,013
Where could I find him?

328
00:28:46,391 --> 00:28:47,684
Hello?

329
00:28:49,311 --> 00:28:51,438
Who dares enter my room?

330
00:28:51,605 --> 00:28:55,108
Sorry! I hope I'm not interrupting,
but I'm told you're the one to talk to

331
00:28:55,275 --> 00:28:56,944
about an ogre problem?

332
00:28:57,110 --> 00:28:59,112
You are told correct.

333
00:28:59,905 --> 00:29:03,283
But for this, I charge
a great deal of money.

334
00:29:03,450 --> 00:29:05,452
Would this be enough?

335
00:29:12,292 --> 00:29:17,381
You have engaged my valuable
services, Your Majesty.

336
00:29:17,547 --> 00:29:20,842
Just tell me where I can find this ogre.

337
00:30:29,202 --> 00:30:33,707
Dear Knight, I pray that you take
this favour as a token of my gratitude.

338
00:30:55,979 --> 00:30:57,230
Dear Diary...

339
00:30:57,397 --> 00:31:00,025
Sleeping Beauty is having
a slumber party tomorrow,

340
00:31:00,192 --> 00:31:04,029
but Dad says I can't go.
He never lets me out after sunset.

341
00:31:04,905 --> 00:31:07,240
Dad says I'm going away for a while.

342
00:31:07,407 --> 00:31:10,077
Must be like some
finishing school or something.

343
00:31:11,078 --> 00:31:12,913
Mom says that when I'm old enough,

344
00:31:13,080 --> 00:31:15,874
my handsome Prince Charming
will rescue me from my tower

345
00:31:16,041 --> 00:31:17,667
and bring me back to my family.

346
00:31:18,585 --> 00:31:21,713
And we'll all live happily ever after.

347
00:31:23,423 --> 00:31:25,550
Mrs Fiona Charming.

348
00:31:27,010 --> 00:31:28,762
Mrs Fiona Charming.

349
00:31:28,929 --> 00:31:30,347
Mrs Fiona Charming.

350
00:31:30,514 --> 00:31:33,600
Mrs Fiona Charming...

351
00:31:42,442 --> 00:31:45,278
Sorry. I hope I'm not
interrupting anything.

352
00:31:45,445 --> 00:31:51,034
No, no.
I was just reading a scary book.

353
00:31:51,451 --> 00:31:56,081
I was hoping you'd let me apologize
for my despicable behaviour earlier.

354
00:31:56,248 --> 00:31:58,583
-OK...
-1 don't know what came over me.

355
00:31:58,750 --> 00:32:02,129
Do you suppose we could pretend
it never happened and start over...

356
00:32:02,295 --> 00:32:05,215
- Look, Your Majesty, I just...
- Please. Call me Dad.

357
00:32:05,465 --> 00:32:09,553
Dad. We both acted like ogres.

358
00:32:09,719 --> 00:32:13,098
Maybe we just need some time
to get to know each other.

359
00:32:13,265 --> 00:32:17,644
Excellent idea! I was actually hoping
you might join me for a morning hunt.

360
00:32:17,811 --> 00:32:19,813
A little father-son time?

361
00:32:21,481 --> 00:32:24,151
I know it would mean
the world to Fiona.

362
00:32:32,993 --> 00:32:36,997
Shall we say,
7:30 by the old oak?

363
00:32:42,502 --> 00:32:44,504
Face it, Donkey! We're lost.

364
00:32:44,671 --> 00:32:47,591
We can't be lost. We followed
the King's instructions exactly.

365
00:32:47,757 --> 00:32:50,010
What did he say? "Head to the
deepest, darkest part of the woods..."

366
00:32:50,177 --> 00:32:51,636
-Aye.
- "Past the sinister trees

367
00:32:51,803 --> 00:32:53,680
- with those scary-looking branches."
- Check.

368
00:32:53,847 --> 00:32:55,849
Yeah, and there's that
bush shaped like Shirley Bassey!

369
00:32:56,016 --> 00:32:58,351
We passed that bush
three times already!

370
00:32:58,518 --> 00:33:01,313
Hey, you were the one who said
you didn't wanna stop for directions.

371
00:33:01,479 --> 00:33:05,817
Great. My one chance
to fix things up with Fiona's dad

372
00:33:05,984 --> 00:33:07,861
and I end up lost in the woods with you!

373
00:33:08,028 --> 00:33:10,197
All right. You don't have to get
all huffy! I'm only trying to help.

374
00:33:10,363 --> 00:33:12,324
know! I know.

375
00:33:14,701 --> 00:33:17,954
- I'm sorry, all right?
- Hey, don't worry about it.

376
00:33:18,121 --> 00:33:21,208
I just really need to make
things work with this guy.

377
00:33:21,374 --> 00:33:24,211
Yeah, sure. Now let's go
bond with Daddy.

378
00:33:32,177 --> 00:33:33,511
Well, well, well, Donkey.

379
00:33:33,678 --> 00:33:37,140
I know it was kind of a tender
moment back there, but the purring?

380
00:33:37,307 --> 00:33:39,017
What are you talking about?
I ain't purring.

381
00:33:39,184 --> 00:33:41,895
Oh, sure. What's next? A hug?

382
00:33:42,062 --> 00:33:45,690
Shrek, donkeys don't purr. What do
you think I am, some kind of a...

383
00:33:46,566 --> 00:33:48,360
Fear me! If you dare!

384
00:33:49,236 --> 00:33:50,445
Hey, look! A little cat.

385
00:33:50,612 --> 00:33:53,990
- Look out, Shrek! He got a piece!
- It's a cat, Donkey.

386
00:33:54,157 --> 00:33:55,992
Come here,
little kitty, kitty, kitty.

387
00:33:56,159 --> 00:34:01,248
Come on, little kitty. Come here.
Oh! Come here, little kitty.

388
00:34:04,251 --> 00:34:08,546
- Hold on, Shrek! I'm coming!
- Come on! Get it off! Get it off!

389
00:34:14,594 --> 00:34:16,930
- Look out, Shrek! Hold still!
- Get it off!

390
00:34:17,097 --> 00:34:19,099
Shrek! Hold still!

391
00:34:20,308 --> 00:34:24,187
- Did I miss?
- No. You got them.

392
00:34:27,857 --> 00:34:31,403
Now, ye ogre, pray for mercy from...

393
00:34:33,154 --> 00:34:35,949
...Puss... In Boots.

394
00:34:36,116 --> 00:34:37,742
I'll kill that cat!

395
00:34:57,846 --> 00:35:00,682
- Hairball.
- Oh! That is nasty!

396
00:35:01,975 --> 00:35:03,601
What do you reckon
we should do with him?

397
00:35:03,768 --> 00:35:05,645
I say we take the sword
and neuter him right here.

398
00:35:05,812 --> 00:35:06,980
Give him the Bob Barker treatment.

399
00:35:07,147 --> 00:35:11,609
No! Please, I implore you!
It was nothing personal, Senor.

400
00:35:11,776 --> 00:35:14,529
I was doing it only for my family.
My mother, she is sick.

401
00:35:14,696 --> 00:35:17,115
And my father lives off the garbage!

402
00:35:17,282 --> 00:35:20,785
The King offered me much in gold
and I have a litter of brothers...

403
00:35:22,329 --> 00:35:24,998
Fiona's father paid you to do this?

404
00:35:25,165 --> 00:35:27,083
The rich King? Si.

405
00:35:30,128 --> 00:35:33,506
Well, so much for Dad's royal blessing.

406
00:35:33,673 --> 00:35:35,342
Come on, Shrek. Don't feel bad.

407
00:35:35,508 --> 00:35:37,344
Almost everybody
that meets you wants to kill you.

408
00:35:37,510 --> 00:35:38,887
Gee, thanks.

409
00:35:42,015 --> 00:35:46,436
Maybe Fiona would've been better off
if I were some sort of Prince Charming.

410
00:35:46,603 --> 00:35:47,979
That's what the King said.

411
00:35:50,523 --> 00:35:52,692
Sorry. I thought that question
was directed at me.

412
00:35:53,860 --> 00:35:56,738
Shrek, Fiona knows
you'd do anything for her.

413
00:35:56,905 --> 00:36:00,033
Well, it's not like I wouldn't
change if I could.

414
00:36:00,450 --> 00:36:01,868
I just...

415
00:36:02,035 --> 00:36:04,204
I just wish I could make her happy.

416
00:36:06,373 --> 00:36:07,874
Hold the phone...

417
00:36:09,834 --> 00:36:11,336
"Happiness."

418
00:36:11,795 --> 00:36:14,214
"A tear drop away."

419
00:36:14,964 --> 00:36:18,385
Donkey! Think of the saddest thing
that's ever happened to you!

420
00:36:19,302 --> 00:36:21,054
Man, where do I begin?

421
00:36:21,221 --> 00:36:24,182
First there was the time that old farmer
tried to sell me for some magic beans.

422
00:36:24,349 --> 00:36:25,475
I ain't never got over that.

423
00:36:25,642 --> 00:36:29,270
Then this fool had a party and he have
the guests trying to pin the tail on me.

424
00:36:29,437 --> 00:36:33,483
Then they got drunk and start beating
me with a stick, going "Pinata!"

425
00:36:33,650 --> 00:36:34,859
What is a pinata, anyway?

426
00:36:35,026 --> 00:36:37,404
No, Donkey! I need you to cry!

427
00:36:37,570 --> 00:36:41,408
Don't go projecting on me. I know you're
feeling bad, but you got to let...

428
00:36:44,077 --> 00:36:46,621
You little, hairy,
litter-licking sack of...

429
00:36:53,962 --> 00:36:55,964
What? Is it on? Is it on?

430
00:36:57,257 --> 00:36:58,925
This is Fairy Godmother.

431
00:36:59,092 --> 00:37:02,846
I'm either away from my desk or with
a client. But if you come by the office,

432
00:37:03,012 --> 00:37:05,849
we'll be glad to make you
a personal appointment.

433
00:37:06,015 --> 00:37:07,767
Have a "happy ever after."

434
00:37:12,188 --> 00:37:14,357
Are you up for a little quest, Donkey?

435
00:37:14,524 --> 00:37:15,650
All right, that's more like it!

436
00:37:15,817 --> 00:37:17,944
Shrek and Donkey,
on another whirlwind adventure!

437
00:37:21,656 --> 00:37:26,244
- Stop, Ogre! I have misjudged you.
- Join the club. We've got jackets.

438
00:37:26,411 --> 00:37:28,872
On my honour,
I am obliged to accompany you

439
00:37:29,038 --> 00:37:31,624
until I have saved your life
as you have spared me mine.

440
00:37:31,791 --> 00:37:35,670
I'm sorry, the position of annoying
talking animal has already been taken.

441
00:37:35,837 --> 00:37:38,548
Let's go, Shrek. Shrek?

442
00:37:47,474 --> 00:37:50,727
- Shrek!
- Come on, Donkey. Look at him...

443
00:37:50,894 --> 00:37:52,687
...in his wee little boots.

444
00:37:52,854 --> 00:37:56,316
You know, how many cats
can wear boots? Honestly.

445
00:37:56,483 --> 00:37:58,359
- Let's keep him!
- Say what?

446
00:38:02,071 --> 00:38:03,781
Listen. He's purring!

447
00:38:03,948 --> 00:38:06,951
- So now it's cute.
- Come on, Donkey. Lighten up.

448
00:38:07,118 --> 00:38:10,622
Lighten up? I should lighten up.
Look who's telling who to lighten up!

449
00:38:14,334 --> 00:38:15,668
Shrek...

450
00:38:20,298 --> 00:38:21,508
Shrek?

451
00:38:32,018 --> 00:38:36,272
They're both festive, aren't they?
What do you think, Harold?

452
00:38:37,190 --> 00:38:38,942
Yes. Yes, fine. Fine.

453
00:38:41,027 --> 00:38:43,363
Try to at least pretend
that you're interested

454
00:38:43,530 --> 00:38:44,948
in your daughter's wedding ball.

455
00:38:45,114 --> 00:38:47,200
Honestly, Lillian,
I don't think it really matters.

456
00:38:47,367 --> 00:38:49,702
How do we know there's
even going to be a ball?

457
00:38:49,869 --> 00:38:51,412
Mom. Dad.

458
00:38:51,579 --> 00:38:55,208
- Oh, hello, dear.
- What's that, Cedric? Right! Coming.

459
00:38:55,834 --> 00:38:57,877
Mom, have you seen Shrek?

460
00:38:58,044 --> 00:39:00,838
I haven't. You should ask your father.

461
00:39:01,005 --> 00:39:05,510
Be sure and use small words, dear.
He's a little slow this morning.

462
00:39:05,677 --> 00:39:08,054
- Can I help you, Your Majesty?
-Yes!

463
00:39:09,848 --> 00:39:11,683
Exquisite. What do you call this dish?

464
00:39:11,850 --> 00:39:14,894
That would be the dog's breakfast,
Your Majesty.

465
00:39:15,728 --> 00:39:18,314
Yes. Very good, then.
Carry on, Cedric.

466
00:39:18,481 --> 00:39:22,860
- Dad? Have you seen Shrek?
- No, I haven't, dear.

467
00:39:23,027 --> 00:39:26,739
I'm sure he just went off to look
for a nice mud hole to cool down in.

468
00:39:26,906 --> 00:39:29,450
You know,
after your little spat last night.

469
00:39:30,118 --> 00:39:32,912
- You heard that?
- Darling, the whole kingdom heard you.

470
00:39:33,079 --> 00:39:36,124
I mean, after all,
it is in his nature to be,

471
00:39:36,291 --> 00:39:38,167
well, a bit of a brute.

472
00:39:38,334 --> 00:39:42,005
Him? You know, you didn't exactly
roll out the welcome wagon.

473
00:39:42,171 --> 00:39:45,592
Well, what did you expect?
Look at what he's done to you.

474
00:39:46,467 --> 00:39:48,803
Shrek loves me for who I am.

475
00:39:49,596 --> 00:39:51,931
I would think you'd be happy for me.

476
00:39:52,098 --> 00:39:55,476
Darling, I'm just thinking about
what's best for you.

477
00:39:55,643 --> 00:39:58,438
Maybe you should do the same.

478
00:40:12,410 --> 00:40:14,078
No, really?

479
00:40:26,215 --> 00:40:29,218
No, that's the old Keebler's place.
Let's just back away slowly.

480
00:40:29,385 --> 00:40:31,220
That's the Fairy Godmother's cottage.

481
00:40:31,387 --> 00:40:34,807
She's the largest producer of hexes
and potions in the whole kingdom.

482
00:40:34,974 --> 00:40:38,603
Then why don't we pop in there
for a spell? Spell.

483
00:40:44,025 --> 00:40:45,485
He makes me laugh.

484
00:40:51,324 --> 00:40:53,159
Hi. I'm here to see the...

485
00:40:53,326 --> 00:40:56,287
The Fairy Godmother.
I'm sorry. She is not in.

486
00:40:56,454 --> 00:40:59,666
Jerome! Coffee and
a Monte Cristo. Now!

487
00:41:00,750 --> 00:41:03,878
Yes, Fairy Godmother. Right away.

488
00:41:04,045 --> 00:41:06,673
Look, she's not seeing
any clients today, OK?

489
00:41:06,839 --> 00:41:08,675
That's OK, buddy.
We're from the union.

490
00:41:08,841 --> 00:41:10,009
"he union?

491
00:41:10,176 --> 00:41:14,639
We represent the workers in all magical
industries, both evil and benign.

492
00:41:15,306 --> 00:41:16,349
Oh! Right.

493
00:41:16,516 --> 00:41:19,602
Are you feeling at all
degraded or oppressed?

494
00:41:20,478 --> 00:41:23,189
A little. We don't even have dental.

495
00:41:23,356 --> 00:41:25,024
They don't even have dental.

496
00:41:25,483 --> 00:41:27,568
OK, we're just gonna
have a look around.

497
00:41:27,735 --> 00:41:29,779
By the way, I think it'd be better

498
00:41:29,946 --> 00:41:32,031
if the Fairy Godmother
didn't know we were here.

499
00:41:32,198 --> 00:41:33,324
Know what I'm saying?

500
00:41:35,368 --> 00:41:38,621
- Stop it.
- Of course. Go right in.

501
00:42:08,067 --> 00:42:09,736
A drop of desire.

502
00:42:11,446 --> 00:42:12,655
Naughty.

503
00:42:13,865 --> 00:42:15,533
A pinch of passion.

504
00:42:20,830 --> 00:42:23,583
And just a hint of...

505
00:42:23,750 --> 00:42:24,917
...lust!

506
00:42:28,421 --> 00:42:29,756
Excuse me.

507
00:42:30,506 --> 00:42:32,091
Sorry to barge in like this, but...

508
00:42:32,258 --> 00:42:34,969
What in Grimm's name
are you doing here?

509
00:42:35,136 --> 00:42:36,262
Well...

510
00:42:36,429 --> 00:42:40,516
It seems that Fiona's not exactly happy.

511
00:42:41,976 --> 00:42:44,520
And there's some question
as to why that is?

512
00:42:45,480 --> 00:42:47,607
Well, let's explore that, shall we?

513
00:42:51,360 --> 00:42:53,154
Princess. Cinderella.

514
00:42:53,321 --> 00:42:56,365
Here we are. "Lived happily
ever after." Oh...

515
00:42:56,532 --> 00:42:58,618
No ogres!

516
00:42:58,785 --> 00:43:00,119
Let's see. Snow White.

517
00:43:00,286 --> 00:43:03,956
A handsome prince. Oh, no ogres.

518
00:43:04,123 --> 00:43:06,292
Sleeping Beauty. Oh, no ogres!

519
00:43:06,459 --> 00:43:09,545
Hansel and Gretel? No!
Thumbelina? No.

520
00:43:09,712 --> 00:43:12,590
The Golden Bird,
The Little Mermaid, Pretty Woman...

521
00:43:12,757 --> 00:43:15,635
No, no, no, no, no!

522
00:43:15,802 --> 00:43:19,806
You see, ogres don't
live happily ever after.

523
00:43:19,972 --> 00:43:22,141
- All right, look, lady!
- Don't you point

524
00:43:22,308 --> 00:43:25,311
those dirty green sausages at me!

525
00:43:26,771 --> 00:43:28,481
Monte Cristo and coffee.

526
00:43:28,648 --> 00:43:30,149
Oh! Sorry.

527
00:43:31,400 --> 00:43:34,570
That's OK. We were just leaving.

528
00:43:34,737 --> 00:43:37,323
Very sorry to have wasted your time,
Miss Godmother.

529
00:43:37,490 --> 00:43:39,158
Just go.

530
00:43:39,325 --> 00:43:40,660
Come on, guys.

531
00:43:56,509 --> 00:43:58,469
TGIF, eh, buddy?

532
00:44:00,429 --> 00:44:03,141
Working hard or hardly working,
eh, Mac?

533
00:44:12,692 --> 00:44:14,610
Man, you wanna get
your fine Corinthian footwear

534
00:44:14,777 --> 00:44:17,363
and your cat cheeks out
of my face? Man, that stinks!

535
00:44:18,156 --> 00:44:21,242
Well, you don't exactly smell
like a basket of roses.

536
00:44:24,370 --> 00:44:28,708
- Well, one of these has got to help.
-1 was just concocting this very plan!

537
00:44:28,875 --> 00:44:31,335
Already our minds are becoming one.

538
00:44:33,337 --> 00:44:36,799
Listen, if we need an expert on licking
ourselves, we'll give you a call.

539
00:44:36,966 --> 00:44:38,551
Shrek, this is a bad idea.

540
00:44:38,718 --> 00:44:41,888
Look. Make yourself useful
and go keep watch.

541
00:44:42,054 --> 00:44:45,224
Puss, do you think you
could get to those on top?

542
00:44:45,391 --> 00:44:46,392
No problema, boss.

543
00:44:46,559 --> 00:44:50,980
In one of my nine lives, I was the great
cat burglar of Santiago de Compostela.

544
00:44:51,898 --> 00:44:53,232
Shrek, are you off your nut?

545
00:44:53,399 --> 00:44:54,901
Donkey, keep watch.

546
00:44:55,067 --> 00:44:56,944
Keep watch?
Yeah, I'm gonna keep watch.

547
00:44:57,111 --> 00:44:58,946
I'll watch that
wicked witch come down here

548
00:44:59,113 --> 00:45:01,073
and whammy zammy a world
of hurt all up your backside.

549
00:45:01,240 --> 00:45:04,035
I'm gonna laugh, too.
I'm gonna be giggling to myself.

550
00:45:04,201 --> 00:45:06,913
- What do you see?
- "Toad Stool Softener?"

551
00:45:07,079 --> 00:45:11,042
Oh, yeah. I'm sure a nice BM is the
perfect solution for marital problems.

552
00:45:11,209 --> 00:45:12,418
Elf a Seltzer?

553
00:45:13,211 --> 00:45:16,672
- "Hex Lax?"
- No! Try "Handsome."

554
00:45:17,590 --> 00:45:19,091
Sorry. No handsome.

555
00:45:20,343 --> 00:45:23,346
Hey! How about "Happily Ever After?"

556
00:45:23,512 --> 00:45:25,598
Well, what does it do?

557
00:45:26,223 --> 00:45:28,935
It says "Beauty Divine."

558
00:45:29,101 --> 00:45:32,396
In some cultures, donkeys are
revered as the wisest of all creatures.

559
00:45:32,563 --> 00:45:34,190
Especially us talking ones.

560
00:45:35,149 --> 00:45:36,442
Donkey!

561
00:45:37,944 --> 00:45:39,862
That'll have to do. We've got company.

562
00:45:47,370 --> 00:45:48,621
Can we get on with this?

563
00:45:51,624 --> 00:45:52,667
Hurry!

564
00:46:02,134 --> 00:46:03,594
Nice catch, Donkey!

565
00:46:03,761 --> 00:46:05,680
Finally! A good use for your mouth.

566
00:46:10,142 --> 00:46:11,143
Come on!

567
00:47:12,872 --> 00:47:16,876
Look, I don't care whose fault it is.
Just get this place cleaned up!

568
00:47:17,043 --> 00:47:18,044
Yes, Godmother.

569
00:47:18,210 --> 00:47:22,548
And somebody bring me something
deep fried and smothered in chocolate!

570
00:47:23,924 --> 00:47:27,011
- Mother!
- Charming. Sweetheart.

571
00:47:27,636 --> 00:47:30,473
This isn't a good time, pumpkin.
Mama's working.

572
00:47:30,639 --> 00:47:34,143
- Well, what happened here?
- The ogre, that's what!

573
00:47:34,310 --> 00:47:35,853
What? Where is he, Mom?

574
00:47:36,020 --> 00:47:38,481
I shall rend his head
from his shoulders!

575
00:47:38,647 --> 00:47:40,941
will smite him where he stands!

576
00:47:41,108 --> 00:47:45,071
He will rue the very day he stole
my kingdom from me!

577
00:47:46,822 --> 00:47:49,575
Put it away, junior!
You're still gonna be king.

578
00:47:50,201 --> 00:47:52,995
We're just gonna have to come up
with something smarter, that's all.

579
00:47:53,162 --> 00:47:54,413
Pardon...

580
00:47:54,580 --> 00:47:58,751
Everything is accounted for,
Fairy Godmother, except for one potion.

581
00:47:58,918 --> 00:47:59,919
What?

582
00:48:03,089 --> 00:48:06,092
I do believe we can make
this work to our advantage.

583
00:48:07,843 --> 00:48:11,514
"Happily Ever After Potion.
Maximum strength.

584
00:48:11,680 --> 00:48:14,225
For you and your true love.

585
00:48:14,392 --> 00:48:17,228
If one of you drinks this,
you both will be fine.

586
00:48:17,395 --> 00:48:19,897
Happiness, comfort and beauty divine."

587
00:48:20,064 --> 00:48:21,190
"You both will be fine?"

588
00:48:21,357 --> 00:48:23,776
I guess it means
it'll affect Fiona, too.

589
00:48:24,777 --> 00:48:28,447
Hey, man, this don't feel right.
My donkey senses are tingling all over.

590
00:48:28,614 --> 00:48:31,409
Why don't you drop that jug o' voodoo
and let's get out of here.

591
00:48:31,575 --> 00:48:34,995
It says, "Beauty Divine."
How bad can it be?

592
00:48:37,706 --> 00:48:40,167
See, you're allergic to that stuff.
You're gonna have a reaction.

593
00:48:40,334 --> 00:48:42,294
And if you think
that I'm gonna be smearing VapoRub

594
00:48:42,461 --> 00:48:44,463
all over your chest, think again!

595
00:48:44,630 --> 00:48:47,758
Boss, just in case there is something
wrong with the potion,

596
00:48:47,925 --> 00:48:49,718
allow me to take the first sip.

597
00:48:49,885 --> 00:48:53,139
It would be an honour to lay my life
on the line for you.

598
00:48:53,305 --> 00:48:55,474
No, no, no. I don't think so.

599
00:48:55,641 --> 00:48:57,977
If there's gonna be
any animal testing, I'm gonna do it.

600
00:48:58,144 --> 00:49:01,272
That's the best friend's job.
Now give me that bottle.

601
00:49:06,944 --> 00:49:08,320
How do you feel?

602
00:49:09,155 --> 00:49:12,575
I don't feel any different.
I look any different?

603
00:49:12,741 --> 00:49:14,910
You still look like an ass to me.

604
00:49:15,661 --> 00:49:17,997
Maybe it doesn't work on donkeys.

605
00:49:18,873 --> 00:49:20,958
Well...

606
00:49:21,125 --> 00:49:22,877
- Here's to us, Fiona.
- Shrek!

607
00:49:23,544 --> 00:49:26,505
- You drink that, there's no going back.
-1 know.

608
00:49:26,672 --> 00:49:28,465
- But, no more wallowing in the mud?
-1 know.

609
00:49:28,632 --> 00:49:30,301
- No more itchy butt crack?
-1 know!

610
00:49:30,467 --> 00:49:32,803
- But you love being an ogre!
-1 know!

611
00:49:36,515 --> 00:49:38,517
But I love Fiona more.

612
00:49:39,852 --> 00:49:41,687
Shrek, no! Wait!

613
00:49:55,534 --> 00:49:58,871
Got to be... Shrek, I think you grabbed
the "Farty Ever After" potion.

614
00:49:59,038 --> 00:50:00,206
Maybe it's a dud.

615
00:50:01,415 --> 00:50:03,876
Or maybe Fiona and I
were never meant to be.

616
00:50:08,547 --> 00:50:11,050
What did I tell you?
I think I feel something coming on.

617
00:50:11,217 --> 00:50:13,594
I don't want to die.
I don't want to die!

618
00:50:13,761 --> 00:50:17,890
I don't want to die! Oh, sweet sister,
mother of mercy. I'm melting!

619
00:50:18,057 --> 00:50:20,059
I'm melting!

620
00:50:20,226 --> 00:50:21,727
It's just the rain, Donkey.

621
00:51:07,106 --> 00:51:10,109
Shrek, don't worry. Things just
seem bad because it's dark and rainy

622
00:51:10,276 --> 00:51:13,612
and Fiona's father hired a sleazy
hit man to whack you.

623
00:51:13,779 --> 00:51:16,907
It'll be better in the morning.
You'll see.

624
00:51:24,873 --> 00:51:26,584
Bet my bottom?

625
00:51:26,750 --> 00:51:28,043
I'm coming, Elizabeth!

626
00:51:28,460 --> 00:51:31,714
Donkey? Are you all right?

627
00:51:31,880 --> 00:51:34,800
Hey, boss. Let's shave him.

628
00:51:34,967 --> 00:51:36,552
Donkey?

629
00:51:45,144 --> 00:51:47,521
There you are!
We missed you at dinner.

630
00:51:48,897 --> 00:51:50,316
What is it, darling?

631
00:51:50,482 --> 00:51:51,984
Dad...

632
00:51:52,151 --> 00:51:54,486
I've been thinking
about what you said.

633
00:51:55,487 --> 00:51:57,364
And I'm going to set things right.

634
00:51:58,073 --> 00:51:59,950
Excellent! That's my girl.

635
00:52:00,117 --> 00:52:02,786
It was a mistake to bring Shrek here.

636
00:52:02,953 --> 00:52:05,122
I'm going to go out and find him.

637
00:52:05,706 --> 00:52:08,834
And then we're gonna go back
to the swamp where we belong.

638
00:52:12,004 --> 00:52:13,672
Fiona, please!

639
00:52:13,839 --> 00:52:16,967
Let's not be rash, darling.
You can't go anywhere right now.

640
00:52:19,845 --> 00:52:21,513
- Fiona...
- Fiona!

641
00:53:00,844 --> 00:53:05,766
Look, I told you he was here.
Look at him! Quiet. Look at him.

642
00:53:08,143 --> 00:53:09,728
Good morning, sleepyhead.

643
00:53:11,146 --> 00:53:12,523
- Good morning!
- Good morning!

644
00:53:12,689 --> 00:53:14,024
We love your kitty!

645
00:53:15,067 --> 00:53:17,820
- My head...
- Here, I fetched you a pail of water.

646
00:53:18,445 --> 00:53:19,488
"hanks.

647
00:53:27,496 --> 00:53:29,832
A cute button nose?

648
00:53:30,249 --> 00:53:32,251
Thick, wavy locks?

649
00:53:33,168 --> 00:53:35,212
Taut, round buttocks?

650
00:53:36,088 --> 00:53:37,506
I'm... I'm...

651
00:53:37,673 --> 00:53:38,924
- Gorgeous!
- I'll say.

652
00:53:39,091 --> 00:53:41,468
I'm Jill. What's your name?

653
00:53:41,635 --> 00:53:44,930
- Shrek.
- Shrek? Wow. Are you from Europe?

654
00:53:45,472 --> 00:53:47,391
- You're so tense.
-1 want to rub his shoulders.

655
00:53:47,558 --> 00:53:50,102
-1 got it covered, thanks.
-1 don't have anything to rub.

656
00:53:50,269 --> 00:53:51,770
Get in line.

657
00:53:51,937 --> 00:53:53,147
Have you seen my donkey?

658
00:53:53,313 --> 00:53:54,857
Who are you calling Donkey?

659
00:53:56,316 --> 00:53:59,778
- Donkey? You're a...
- A stallion, baby!

660
00:53:59,945 --> 00:54:03,115
I can whinny. I can count.

661
00:54:03,782 --> 00:54:06,410
Look at me, Shrek! I'm trotting!

662
00:54:07,286 --> 00:54:10,122
That's some quality potion.
What's in that stuff?

663
00:54:10,289 --> 00:54:13,459
"Oh, don't take the potion,
Mr Boss, it's very bad."

664
00:54:14,793 --> 00:54:19,131
"Warning: Side effects may include
burning, itching, oozing, weeping."

665
00:54:19,298 --> 00:54:23,218
"Not intended for heart patients
or those with nervous disorders."

666
00:54:23,385 --> 00:54:25,679
I'm trotting,
I'm trotting in place! Yeah!

667
00:54:28,140 --> 00:54:29,141
What?

668
00:54:29,308 --> 00:54:30,309
Senoii

669
00:54:30,476 --> 00:54:32,561
"To make the effects
of this potion permanent

670
00:54:32,728 --> 00:54:36,607
the drinker must obtain his
true love's kiss by midnight."

671
00:54:36,773 --> 00:54:38,984
Midnight? Why is it always midnight?

672
00:54:39,151 --> 00:54:41,862
- Pick me! I'll be your true love!
- I'll be your true love.

673
00:54:42,029 --> 00:54:44,531
I'll be true... enough.

674
00:54:44,698 --> 00:54:48,118
Look, ladies,
I already have a true love.

675
00:54:49,328 --> 00:54:53,499
And take it from me, Boss. You are
going to have one satisfied Princess.

676
00:54:54,041 --> 00:54:56,668
And let's face it.
You are a lot easier on the eyes.

677
00:54:56,835 --> 00:54:59,171
But inside you're
still the same old mean, salty...

678
00:54:59,338 --> 00:55:01,298
- Easy.
- ...cantankerous, foul,

679
00:55:01,465 --> 00:55:03,175
angry ogre you always been.

680
00:55:03,342 --> 00:55:05,427
And you're still the same
annoying donkey.

681
00:55:05,594 --> 00:55:06,595
Yeah.

682
00:55:08,764 --> 00:55:09,848
Well...

683
00:55:10,432 --> 00:55:13,811
Look out, Princess.
Here comes the new me.

684
00:55:15,103 --> 00:55:17,815
First things first. We need to get
you out of those clothes.

685
00:55:22,653 --> 00:55:24,279
- Ready?
- Ready!

686
00:55:29,034 --> 00:55:30,202
Driver, stop!

687
00:55:30,369 --> 00:55:33,372
Oh, God! Help me, please!
My racing days are over!

688
00:55:33,539 --> 00:55:36,959
I'm blind! Tell the truth. Will I
ever be able to play the violin again?

689
00:55:37,125 --> 00:55:41,171
You poor creature!
Is there anything I can do for you?

690
00:55:41,922 --> 00:55:43,549
Well, there is one thing.

691
00:55:43,715 --> 00:55:46,510
Take off the powdered wig and step
away from your drawers.

692
00:55:50,806 --> 00:55:52,849
- Not bad.
- Not bad at all.

693
00:56:00,983 --> 00:56:04,111
Father? Is everything all right, Father?

694
00:56:09,408 --> 00:56:13,245
Thank you, gentlemen!
Someday, I will repay you.

695
00:56:13,412 --> 00:56:16,915
Unless, of course,
I can't find you or if I forget.

696
00:57:01,126 --> 00:57:02,127
Halt!

697
00:57:02,294 --> 00:57:05,213
Tell Princess Fiona her husband,
Sir Shrek, is here to see her.

698
00:57:27,319 --> 00:57:28,320
Fiona!

699
00:57:28,487 --> 00:57:29,529
Shrek?

700
00:57:32,991 --> 00:57:34,159
Shrek?

701
00:57:39,498 --> 00:57:40,499
Fiona!

702
00:57:44,002 --> 00:57:45,796
Hello, handsome.

703
00:57:47,714 --> 00:57:48,840
Shrek!

704
00:57:49,007 --> 00:57:52,260
- Princess!
- Donkey?

705
00:57:52,427 --> 00:57:53,845
That potion worked on you, too?

706
00:57:54,680 --> 00:57:55,847
What potion?

707
00:57:56,014 --> 00:57:59,059
It's kind of a long story. Shrek and I
took some magic potion. And well...

708
00:57:59,226 --> 00:58:01,478
Now, we're sexy!

709
00:58:02,771 --> 00:58:03,897
Shrek?

710
00:58:08,026 --> 00:58:10,654
For you, baby... I could be.

711
00:58:10,821 --> 00:58:13,031
- Yeah, you wish.
- Donkey, where is Shrek?

712
00:58:13,198 --> 00:58:15,492
He went inside looking for you.

713
00:58:17,369 --> 00:58:18,704
Shrek!

714
00:58:19,329 --> 00:58:22,082
Fiona! Fiona!

715
00:58:23,875 --> 00:58:26,044
You wanna dance, pretty boy?

716
00:58:28,880 --> 00:58:32,551
Are you going so soon?
Don't you want to see your wife?

717
00:58:33,885 --> 00:58:35,220
Fiona?

718
00:58:37,389 --> 00:58:41,017
- Shrek?
- Aye, Fiona. It is me.

719
00:58:41,184 --> 00:58:43,228
What happened to your voice?

720
00:58:43,603 --> 00:58:47,399
The potion changed
a lot of things, Fiona.

721
00:58:47,566 --> 00:58:50,068
But not the way I feel about you.

722
00:58:50,235 --> 00:58:51,737
Fiona?

723
00:58:52,571 --> 00:58:53,905
Charming?

724
00:58:54,072 --> 00:58:55,365
Do you think so?

725
00:58:56,032 --> 00:58:59,369
Dad? I was so hoping you'd approve.

726
00:59:00,037 --> 00:59:02,998
- Who are you?
- Mom, it's me, Shrek.

727
00:59:03,165 --> 00:59:06,501
I know you never get a second chance
at a first impression

728
00:59:06,668 --> 00:59:09,087
but, well, what do you think?

729
00:59:13,091 --> 00:59:16,136
Fiona! Fiona!

730
00:59:16,303 --> 00:59:17,596
Fiona!

731
00:59:17,763 --> 00:59:19,598
Fiona!

732
00:59:19,765 --> 00:59:23,143
- Fiona!
- Fiona! Fiona!

733
00:59:23,310 --> 00:59:27,063
Oh, shoot! I don't think they
can hear us, pigeon.

734
00:59:29,649 --> 00:59:33,070
Don't you think you've already
messed her life up enough?

735
00:59:33,945 --> 00:59:35,947
I just wanted her to be happy.

736
00:59:36,114 --> 00:59:38,366
And now she can be.

737
00:59:38,533 --> 00:59:40,744
Oh, sweetheart.

738
00:59:40,911 --> 00:59:44,289
She's finally found
the prince of her dreams.

739
00:59:44,456 --> 00:59:48,460
But look at me.
Look what I've done for her.

740
00:59:48,627 --> 00:59:51,880
It's time you stop living
in a fairytale, Shrek.

741
00:59:52,047 --> 00:59:56,092
She's a Princess.
And you're an ogre.

742
00:59:56,259 --> 01:00:00,263
That's something no amount of potion
is ever going to change.

743
01:00:07,979 --> 01:00:09,481
But...

744
01:00:09,648 --> 01:00:11,024
...I love her.

745
01:00:11,191 --> 01:00:13,235
If you really love her...

746
01:00:14,152 --> 01:00:16,154
...you'll let her go.

747
01:00:21,243 --> 01:00:23,328
- Shrek?
- Senor\

748
01:00:23,495 --> 01:00:26,331
Hey, what's going on?
Where are you going?

749
01:00:32,462 --> 01:00:36,967
You wouldn't have had anything to do
with this, would you, Harold?

750
01:00:51,481 --> 01:00:53,024
There you go, boys.

751
01:00:53,191 --> 01:00:55,110
Just leave the bottle, Doris.

752
01:00:55,277 --> 01:00:57,654
Hey! Why the long face?

753
01:00:58,864 --> 01:01:01,283
It was all just a stupid mistake.

754
01:01:02,200 --> 01:01:06,037
I never should have rescued her
from that tower in the first place.

755
01:01:08,206 --> 01:01:10,041
I hate Mondays.

756
01:01:10,208 --> 01:01:12,043
I can't believe you're
gonna just walk away

757
01:01:12,210 --> 01:01:13,879
from the best thing
that ever happened to you.

758
01:01:14,045 --> 01:01:15,547
What choice do I have?

759
01:01:15,714 --> 01:01:19,676
She loves that pretty boy,
Prince Charming.

760
01:01:19,843 --> 01:01:21,595
Come on. Is he really
that good-looking?

761
01:01:21,761 --> 01:01:23,889
Are you kidding? He's gorgeous!

762
01:01:24,055 --> 01:01:27,559
He has a face that looks
like it was carved by angels.

763
01:01:27,726 --> 01:01:29,144
He sounds dreamy.

764
01:01:29,311 --> 01:01:33,189
You know, shockingly, this isn't
making me feel any better.

765
01:01:35,942 --> 01:01:39,905
Look, guys. It's for the best.

766
01:01:40,071 --> 01:01:44,743
Mom and Dad approve, and Fiona
gets the man she's always dreamed of.

767
01:01:44,910 --> 01:01:46,786
Everybody wins.

768
01:01:47,829 --> 01:01:49,080
Except for you.

769
01:01:49,623 --> 01:01:52,751
I don't get it, Shrek. You love Fiona.

770
01:01:52,918 --> 01:01:54,085
Aye.

771
01:01:55,086 --> 01:01:57,464
And that's why I have to let her go.

772
01:01:58,256 --> 01:02:01,426
Excuse me, is she here?

773
01:02:01,593 --> 01:02:03,595
She's in the back.

774
01:02:05,430 --> 01:02:06,640
Hello again.

775
01:02:11,061 --> 01:02:13,021
Fairy Godmother. Charming.

776
01:02:14,064 --> 01:02:17,108
You better have a good reason
for dragging us down here, Harold.

777
01:02:17,275 --> 01:02:23,239
Well... I'm afraid Fiona isn't really
warming up to Prince Charming.

778
01:02:23,406 --> 01:02:26,868
- FYI, not my fault.
- No, of course it's not, dear.

779
01:02:27,035 --> 01:02:28,954
I mean, how charming can I be

780
01:02:29,120 --> 01:02:31,248
when I have to pretend
I'm that dreadful ogre?

781
01:02:31,414 --> 01:02:33,416
No! No, it's nobody's fault.

782
01:02:33,583 --> 01:02:36,753
Perhaps it's best if we just
call the whole thing off. OK?

783
01:02:36,920 --> 01:02:37,754
- What?
- What?

784
01:02:37,921 --> 01:02:41,216
You can't force someone
to fall in love!

785
01:02:41,383 --> 01:02:44,469
I beg to differ. I do it all the time!

786
01:02:44,636 --> 01:02:49,140
Have Fiona drink this and she'll fall
in love with the first man she kisses.

787
01:02:49,307 --> 01:02:51,101
Which will be Charming.

788
01:02:53,353 --> 01:02:55,146
- No.
- What did you say?

789
01:02:55,313 --> 01:02:57,774
can't. I won't do it.

790
01:02:57,941 --> 01:02:59,442
Oh, yes, you will.

791
01:02:59,609 --> 01:03:02,946
If you remember, I helped you
with your happily ever after.

792
01:03:03,113 --> 01:03:06,574
And I can take it away just as easily.

793
01:03:06,741 --> 01:03:09,953
Is that what you want? Is it?

794
01:03:11,329 --> 01:03:13,456
- No.
- Good boy.

795
01:03:13,832 --> 01:03:17,669
Now we have to go. I need to do
Charming's hair before the ball.

796
01:03:17,836 --> 01:03:21,047
He's hopeless. He's all high in the
front. He can never get to the back.

797
01:03:21,214 --> 01:03:23,675
You always need someone
to do the back of your hair.

798
01:03:23,842 --> 01:03:25,677
- Thank you, Mother.
- Mother?

799
01:03:27,262 --> 01:03:29,597
Mary! A talking horse!

800
01:03:29,764 --> 01:03:30,849
The ogre!

801
01:03:32,642 --> 01:03:36,646
Stop them! Thieves! Bandits!
Stop them!

802
01:03:38,273 --> 01:03:41,860
Well, the abs are fab and it's gluteus
to the maximus here at tonight's

803
01:03:42,027 --> 01:03:45,071
Far Far Away Royal Ball blowout!

804
01:03:45,238 --> 01:03:47,782
The coaches are lined up as the
cream of the crop pours out of them

805
01:03:47,949 --> 01:03:49,701
like Miss Muffet's curds and whey.

806
01:03:49,868 --> 01:03:51,870
Everyone who's anyone has turned out

807
01:03:52,037 --> 01:03:54,331
to honour Princess Fiona
and Prince Shrek.

808
01:03:54,497 --> 01:03:57,417
And, oh my, the outfits look gorgeous!

809
01:03:57,584 --> 01:03:58,877
Look! Hansel and Gretel!

810
01:03:59,836 --> 01:04:01,546
What the heck are the crumbs for?

811
01:04:01,713 --> 01:04:04,674
And right behind them,
Tom Thumb and Thumbelina!

812
01:04:04,841 --> 01:04:06,926
Oh, aren't they adorable!

813
01:04:07,552 --> 01:04:10,347
Here comes Sleeping Beauty!

814
01:04:10,847 --> 01:04:12,682
Tired old thing.

815
01:04:13,433 --> 01:04:16,311
Who's this? Who's this? Who is this?

816
01:04:17,353 --> 01:04:19,522
It's the one, it's the only...

817
01:04:19,689 --> 01:04:22,192
It's the Fairy Godmother!

818
01:04:22,358 --> 01:04:25,528
Hello, Far Far Away!

819
01:04:26,738 --> 01:04:28,406
Can I get a whoop, whoop?

820
01:04:28,573 --> 01:04:30,075
Whoop, whoop!

821
01:04:30,241 --> 01:04:33,578
May all your endings be happy and...

822
01:04:33,745 --> 01:04:36,331
Well, you know the rest!

823
01:04:36,748 --> 01:04:39,793
We'll be right back
with the Royal Far Far Away Ball

824
01:04:39,959 --> 01:04:41,252
after these messages.

825
01:04:41,419 --> 01:04:43,505
hate these ball shows.

826
01:04:43,671 --> 01:04:46,257
They bore me to tears.
Flip over to Wheel of Torturel

827
01:04:46,424 --> 01:04:50,428
I'm not flipping anywhere, sir,
until I see Shrek and Fiona.

828
01:04:51,554 --> 01:04:53,139
Whizzes on you guys.

829
01:04:53,306 --> 01:04:55,308
Hey, mice, pass me a buffalo wing!

830
01:04:55,475 --> 01:04:57,685
No, to your left. Your left!

831
01:05:00,772 --> 01:05:03,858
- Tonight on Knights...
- Now here's a good show!

832
01:05:04,025 --> 01:05:07,278
We got a white bronco heading east
into the forest. Requesting backup.

833
01:05:07,445 --> 01:05:10,031
It's time for the men in steel
to teach these madcap mammals

834
01:05:10,198 --> 01:05:12,409
their "devil may mare"
attitudes just won't fly.

835
01:05:13,785 --> 01:05:17,539
- Let me go!
- Why you grabbing me? Police brutality!

836
01:05:18,748 --> 01:05:22,252
-1 have to talk to Princess Fiona!
- We warned you!

837
01:05:22,961 --> 01:05:25,338
Will they get away with it? Or did
someone let the cat out of the bag?

838
01:05:25,505 --> 01:05:27,757
You, capitalist pig dogs!

839
01:05:33,012 --> 01:05:34,681
- Catnip!
- That's not mine.

840
01:05:35,807 --> 01:05:37,851
Find Princess Fiona!

841
01:05:38,560 --> 01:05:39,519
I'm a donkey!

842
01:05:39,686 --> 01:05:42,230
Tell her Shrek...
I'm her husband, Shrek!

843
01:05:42,397 --> 01:05:43,398
Knights.

844
01:05:43,565 --> 01:05:44,983
Quick! Rewind it!

845
01:05:45,984 --> 01:05:47,819
...Shrek! I'm her husband, Shrek!

846
01:06:16,389 --> 01:06:17,432
Darling?

847
01:06:18,725 --> 01:06:20,351
I thought I might find you here.

848
01:06:20,518 --> 01:06:24,063
How about a nice hot cup
of tea before the ball?

849
01:06:25,315 --> 01:06:26,524
I'm not going.

850
01:06:26,691 --> 01:06:29,694
But the whole Kingdom's turned out
to celebrate your marriage.

851
01:06:29,861 --> 01:06:33,781
There's just one problem.
That's not my husband.

852
01:06:35,158 --> 01:06:36,618
I mean, look at him.

853
01:06:38,953 --> 01:06:43,541
Yes, he is a bit different, but
people change for the ones they love.

854
01:06:43,708 --> 01:06:46,794
You'd be surprised how much
I changed for your mother.

855
01:06:46,961 --> 01:06:48,588
Change?

856
01:06:48,755 --> 01:06:50,882
He's completely lost his mind!

857
01:06:51,049 --> 01:06:54,052
Darling, why not come down to the ball
and give him another chance?

858
01:06:54,219 --> 01:06:57,514
I mean, you might find you
like this new Shrek.

859
01:06:57,680 --> 01:07:00,892
But it's the old one
I fell in love with, Dad.

860
01:07:01,935 --> 01:07:04,062
I'd give anything to have him back.

861
01:07:07,232 --> 01:07:10,276
Darling! That's mine. Decaf.

862
01:07:10,443 --> 01:07:12,362
Otherwise I'm up all night.

863
01:07:19,244 --> 01:07:20,245
"hanks.

864
01:07:23,373 --> 01:07:27,502
I got to get out of here! You can't lock
us up like this! Let me go!

865
01:07:27,669 --> 01:07:29,045
What about my Miranda Rights?

866
01:07:29,212 --> 01:07:31,923
You're supposed to say
I have the right to remain silent.

867
01:07:32,090 --> 01:07:33,633
Nobody said I have the right
to remain silent!

868
01:07:33,800 --> 01:07:36,928
Donkey, you have
the right to remain silent.

869
01:07:37,095 --> 01:07:39,556
What you lack is the capacity.

870
01:07:39,722 --> 01:07:43,601
I must hold on before I, too,
go totally mad.

871
01:07:43,768 --> 01:07:45,603
Shrek? Donkey?

872
01:07:46,604 --> 01:07:47,605
Too late.

873
01:07:47,772 --> 01:07:51,401
Gingy! Pinocchio! Get us out of here!

874
01:07:56,948 --> 01:07:58,866
Fire in the hole!

875
01:08:17,635 --> 01:08:18,970
Look out below!

876
01:08:21,431 --> 01:08:23,308
Quick! Tell a lie!

877
01:08:23,474 --> 01:08:26,144
- What should I say?
- Anything, but quick!

878
01:08:26,311 --> 01:08:28,396
Say something crazy, like,
"I'm wearing ladies' underwear!"

879
01:08:28,563 --> 01:08:31,482
I am wearing ladies' underwear.

880
01:08:35,320 --> 01:08:37,989
- Are you?
-1 most certainly am not!

881
01:08:39,073 --> 01:08:41,159
It looks like you most certainly am are!

882
01:08:41,326 --> 01:08:42,827
-1 am not!
- What kind?

883
01:08:42,994 --> 01:08:45,496
- It's a thong!
- They're briefs!

884
01:08:45,663 --> 01:08:46,873
- Are not.
- Are too!

885
01:08:47,040 --> 01:08:48,750
- Are not!
- Are too!

886
01:08:48,916 --> 01:08:50,627
Here we go. Hang tight.

887
01:08:54,714 --> 01:08:57,300
Hey, wait! Hey, hey!

888
01:09:01,095 --> 01:09:03,348
- Excuse me?
- What? Puss!

889
01:09:03,514 --> 01:09:05,558
Pardon me, would you
mind letting me go?

890
01:09:05,725 --> 01:09:07,685
- Sorry, boss.
- Quit messing around!

891
01:09:07,852 --> 01:09:09,520
We've got to stop that kiss!

892
01:09:09,687 --> 01:09:11,439
I thought you was going to let her go.

893
01:09:11,606 --> 01:09:13,816
I was, but I can't let them
do this to Fiona.

894
01:09:13,983 --> 01:09:17,111
Boom! That's what I like to hear.
Look who's finally coming around!

895
01:09:17,278 --> 01:09:18,863
It's impossible! We'll never get in.

896
01:09:19,030 --> 01:09:21,616
The castle is guarded and
there is a moat and everything!

897
01:09:23,076 --> 01:09:25,995
Well, folks, it looks like
we're up chocolate creek

898
01:09:26,162 --> 01:09:28,039
without a Popsicle stick.

899
01:09:32,543 --> 01:09:36,047
- What?
- Do you still know the Muffin Man?

900
01:09:36,214 --> 01:09:39,634
Well, sure!
He's down on Drury Lane. Why?

901
01:09:39,801 --> 01:09:42,136
Because we're gonna need flour.

902
01:09:42,303 --> 01:09:45,390
Lots and lots of flour.

903
01:09:48,685 --> 01:09:50,061
Gingy!

904
01:09:50,228 --> 01:09:54,649
Fire up the ovens, Muffin Man!
We've got a big order to fill!

905
01:09:58,611 --> 01:10:00,571
It's alive!

906
01:10:10,248 --> 01:10:12,625
Run, run, run, as fast you can!

907
01:10:19,841 --> 01:10:21,926
Go, baby, go!

908
01:10:23,678 --> 01:10:26,347
There it is, Mongol To the castle!

909
01:10:26,514 --> 01:10:31,102
No, no, no, you great stupid pastry!
Come on!

910
01:10:38,651 --> 01:10:41,362
Mongol Down here! Look at the pony!

911
01:10:42,947 --> 01:10:45,283
That's right! Follow the pretty pony!

912
01:10:45,450 --> 01:10:48,035
Pretty pony wants to play at the castle!

913
01:10:48,202 --> 01:10:49,620
Pretty pony...

914
01:10:51,539 --> 01:10:54,041
Ladies and gentlemen.
Presenting:

915
01:10:54,208 --> 01:10:58,796
Princess Fiona and her new husband,
Prince Shrek.

916
01:11:00,590 --> 01:11:02,550
Shrek, what are you doing?

917
01:11:02,717 --> 01:11:05,470
I'm just playing the part, Fiona.

918
01:11:05,636 --> 01:11:08,055
Is that glitter on your lips?

919
01:11:08,764 --> 01:11:11,058
Cherry flavoured. Want to taste?

920
01:11:11,768 --> 01:11:15,146
- What is with you?
- But, Muffin Cake...

921
01:11:18,149 --> 01:11:20,109
C Minor, put it in C Minor.

922
01:11:21,152 --> 01:11:22,653
Ladies and gentlemen...

923
01:11:25,198 --> 01:11:28,075
I'd like to dedicate this song to

924
01:11:28,242 --> 01:11:31,662
Princess Fiona and Prince Shrek.

925
01:11:32,663 --> 01:11:34,332
Fiona, my Princess.

926
01:11:34,499 --> 01:11:37,084
Will you honour me with a dance?

927
01:11:42,298 --> 01:11:43,925
Dance, dance, dance...

928
01:11:57,104 --> 01:11:58,439
Since when do you dance?

929
01:11:58,606 --> 01:12:01,359
Fiona, my dearest...
if there's one thing I know,

930
01:12:01,526 --> 01:12:04,487
it's that love is full of surprises.

931
01:12:15,039 --> 01:12:16,332
Hit it!

932
01:12:21,337 --> 01:12:24,882
All right, big fellow!
Let's crash this party!

933
01:12:26,300 --> 01:12:28,052
Man the catapults!

934
01:12:28,636 --> 01:12:30,847
Aim! Fire!

935
01:12:31,973 --> 01:12:34,892
- Brace yourselves!
- Purty!

936
01:12:42,400 --> 01:12:44,694
Not the gumdrop button!

937
01:12:51,075 --> 01:12:52,910
Incoming!

938
01:12:54,370 --> 01:12:55,580
All right!

939
01:13:04,380 --> 01:13:06,007
Go, Mongol Go!

940
01:13:09,635 --> 01:13:10,887
Man the cauldrons!

941
01:13:16,726 --> 01:13:18,728
After you, Mongo.

942
01:13:21,564 --> 01:13:25,693
That's it! Heave!
Ho! Watch out!

943
01:13:28,529 --> 01:13:29,864
Shrek!

944
01:13:33,659 --> 01:13:35,453
More heat, less foam!

945
01:13:46,422 --> 01:13:47,965
Heave!

946
01:13:54,931 --> 01:13:57,099
No!

947
01:14:27,755 --> 01:14:28,756
Come on!

948
01:14:29,966 --> 01:14:33,344
- No, no!
- Be good.

949
01:14:35,846 --> 01:14:38,683
He needs me! Let me go!

950
01:14:42,144 --> 01:14:43,396
Donkey!

951
01:14:53,030 --> 01:14:54,365
Puss!

952
01:14:57,493 --> 01:14:59,996
Go! Go! Your lady needs you! Go!

953
01:15:02,748 --> 01:15:05,209
Today, I repay my debt.

954
01:15:14,176 --> 01:15:15,761
En garde\

955
01:15:26,731 --> 01:15:27,857
Stop!

956
01:15:33,320 --> 01:15:36,407
Hey, you! Back away from my wife.

957
01:15:36,574 --> 01:15:37,908
Shrek?

958
01:15:38,701 --> 01:15:43,205
You couldn't just go back to your
swamp and leave well enough alone.

959
01:15:43,372 --> 01:15:45,583
- Now!
- Pigs und blanket!

960
01:15:48,377 --> 01:15:49,795
Pinocchio! Get the wand!

961
01:15:49,962 --> 01:15:51,756
see London! I see France!

962
01:15:55,426 --> 01:15:56,886
I'm a real boy!

963
01:16:08,939 --> 01:16:10,107
Donkey!

964
01:16:14,320 --> 01:16:15,821
I'm a real boy.

965
01:16:20,743 --> 01:16:22,453
"hat's mine! That's mine!

966
01:16:26,624 --> 01:16:28,125
Pray for mercy, from Puss...

967
01:16:28,292 --> 01:16:29,794
And Donkey!

968
01:16:29,960 --> 01:16:32,963
She's taken the potion!
Kiss her now!

969
01:16:36,300 --> 01:16:37,635
No!

970
01:16:59,615 --> 01:17:01,575
- Fiona...
- Shrek.

971
01:17:01,742 --> 01:17:05,454
Harold! You were supposed
to give her the potion!

972
01:17:05,621 --> 01:17:09,416
Well, I guess I gave her the wrong tea.

973
01:17:09,583 --> 01:17:10,793
Mommy!

974
01:17:10,960 --> 01:17:11,961
Mommy?

975
01:17:13,379 --> 01:17:15,256
I told you

976
01:17:15,422 --> 01:17:19,593
ogres don't live happily ever after.

977
01:17:22,012 --> 01:17:24,682
- Harold!
- No...

978
01:17:43,826 --> 01:17:46,620
Dad! Daddy...

979
01:17:49,123 --> 01:17:51,000
- Is he...?
- Yup.

980
01:17:52,376 --> 01:17:54,169
He croaked.

981
01:17:56,088 --> 01:17:57,506
Harold?

982
01:17:57,673 --> 01:17:59,008
Dad?

983
01:17:59,550 --> 01:18:01,635
I'd hoped you'd never see me like this.

984
01:18:01,802 --> 01:18:03,679
Hey, and he gave you a hard time!

985
01:18:03,846 --> 01:18:06,599
- Donkey!
- No, no, he's right. I'm sorry.

986
01:18:07,558 --> 01:18:08,559
To both of you.

987
01:18:08,726 --> 01:18:11,687
I only wanted what was best for Fiona.

988
01:18:12,521 --> 01:18:13,731
But I can see now...

989
01:18:14,815 --> 01:18:16,650
...she already has it.

990
01:18:17,735 --> 01:18:18,986
Shrek, Fiona...

991
01:18:20,237 --> 01:18:23,741
...will you accept
an old frog's apologies

992
01:18:24,909 --> 01:18:26,243
and my blessing?

993
01:18:27,745 --> 01:18:29,955
- Harold...
- I'm sorry, Lillian.

994
01:18:30,122 --> 01:18:33,667
I just wish I could
be the man you deserve.

995
01:18:34,752 --> 01:18:40,090
You're more that man today
than you ever were. Warts and all.

996
01:18:44,094 --> 01:18:46,347
Boss! The Happily Ever After Potion!

997
01:18:46,513 --> 01:18:47,598
Midnight!

998
01:18:48,390 --> 01:18:51,310
Fiona... is this what you want?

999
01:18:52,353 --> 01:18:54,438
To be this way forever?

1000
01:18:54,605 --> 01:18:57,232
- What?
- Because if you kiss me now...

1001
01:18:58,275 --> 01:18:59,944
...we can stay like this.

1002
01:19:00,694 --> 01:19:02,279
You'd do that?

1003
01:19:03,030 --> 01:19:04,990
- For me?
-Yes.

1004
01:19:13,791 --> 01:19:16,293
I want what any princess wants.

1005
01:19:16,794 --> 01:19:19,421
To live happily ever after...

1006
01:19:23,509 --> 01:19:26,178
...with the ogre I married.

1007
01:19:29,306 --> 01:19:32,142
Whatever happens, I must not cry!

1008
01:19:32,309 --> 01:19:34,812
You cannot make me cry!

1009
01:19:59,336 --> 01:20:01,422
No... No, no... No!

1010
01:20:06,343 --> 01:20:07,928
Oh, no...

1011
01:20:24,862 --> 01:20:26,155
Hey...

1012
01:20:26,322 --> 01:20:28,699
...you still look like
a noble steed to me.

1013
01:20:33,287 --> 01:20:35,539
Now, where were we?

1014
01:20:36,999 --> 01:20:38,167
remember.

1015
01:20:45,132 --> 01:20:48,594
Hey! Isn't we supposed
to be having a fiesta?

1016
01:20:48,761 --> 01:20:50,554
Uno, dos, cuatro, hit it!

1017
01:20:58,062 --> 01:20:59,438
Puss and Donkey, y'all...

1018
01:21:05,027 --> 01:21:06,111
Sing it, Puss!

1019
01:21:12,284 --> 01:21:13,619
Here we go!

1020
01:21:43,732 --> 01:21:45,442
Hey gorgeous!

1021
01:22:00,499 --> 01:22:02,167
Sing it one more time now!

1022
01:22:09,675 --> 01:22:11,468
Hey, Donkey, that's Spanish!

1023
01:22:11,635 --> 01:22:12,845
Break it down!

1024
01:22:46,295 --> 01:22:47,796
Sing it one more time, now!

1025
01:24:16,093 --> 01:24:17,135
Amigo?

1026
01:24:17,302 --> 01:24:20,097
We are off to the Kit-Kat Club.
Come on, join us.

1027
01:24:21,056 --> 01:24:23,767
Thanks, compadre.
I'm... I'm just not in the mood.

1028
01:24:23,934 --> 01:24:27,688
We will cheer you up!
Find you a nice burro\

1029
01:24:29,481 --> 01:24:30,566
Hey, baby!

1030
01:24:32,734 --> 01:24:36,321
Hey, that's my girl! Yeah! All right!

1031
01:24:37,114 --> 01:24:38,365
Baby, where you been?

1032
01:24:39,616 --> 01:24:43,412
I'm sorry, too. I should have stayed.
But Shrek had this thing he had to do.

1033
01:24:43,579 --> 01:24:45,080
What? Say it one more time.

1034
01:24:45,247 --> 01:24:47,749
What you talking about?
Are you serious?

1035
01:24:50,669 --> 01:24:51,795
Dada!

1036
01:24:58,885 --> 01:25:01,221
Look at our little mutant babies!

1037
01:25:03,890 --> 01:25:05,434
I got to get a job.