Par (Saki)

“Golf??????”

“Yes - it’s good for your heart. And I wanted to wear a cute outfit”. Her golden eyes look at me, impossibly warm with the sun. She is wearing a white athletic dress that pleasantly shows off her figure while also hiding much. A gentleman’s sport.

——

I always thought of golf, if I thought of it at all, as a sport for geezers and businessmen. Something people did when they had too much money and not enough time; or perhaps the other way around. A quick online search has revealed to me that it is quite a large sport in Japan.

The people on the online forums are telling me it’s a sport about etiquette. About playing fast and honestly. Because it’s a game where you report your own score, it’s a test of yourself. If you are not honest with yourself, how can you be honest with others?

Is that the goal? I suppose in golf, it is so.

——

“This one is a par four, Hisao. Take out your driver, the biggest club in the bag”.

She is looking at me impatiently, chestnut hair in the wind. We are playing on a summer Tuesday so we have the place to ourselves. She flirted with the old man in the shop so we got out here for half the fee. She’s never played either but she’s walking around, in her dress, like a lady professional. Gentleman’s game.

I rummage through the bag. Driver, tees, balls, glove. Arms straight and head still. The internet can’t possibly be wrong.

Look down at the fairway. Long, clean, a cut green driveway with rustling long grasses. It seems so peaceful here. I’m not sure I even want to hit the ball at all. I just want to enjoy the stillness. But there is a girl, and she is on borrowed time. Gentlemen play fast.

——

Skipping. She is skipping down the fairway, and I can smell her strawberry perfume in the air. It is actually a body scrub, she tells me. Another woman wore it once in an elevator in Tokyo and I felt an impossible joy. Proust was right. I was on my way back from the doctor. But I could not help but feel joy and excitement in the air. I miss her.

“Feet together, Hisao. Rhythm. Keep your eyes on the ball”.

I am in the sand. One of those holes on the course they call a bunker. Something to be avoided, a hazard. But it is part of life. You have to play it as it lies. And play it honestly.

——

You get to eat little snacks and drinks while you play golf. Cookies and bars and hydrating sports drinks. I’m not quite sure this is a real sport. You’re never out of breath. But as I walk down the fairway with her I feel a thrill. Soon the golf will be over, then the day, the month, the year. Am I afraid of my future? Or hers? The present contains so much joy; full, sincere, joy.

“Can you carry my clubs to the next tee box, Hisao? I’m tired”.

Yes, I can. She does look a little tired. It is a long walk in the sun and we are almost done. The sky is blue but I feel the woods around us too. Legrandin looks to the sky and says it is still blue although he fears the darkness of the woods. I look up.

——

She kisses me. A soft, warm, pink. It has a touch of desire but I know it is one of love. Her hands are trembling from exhaustion.

“Thank you for today, Hisao. I always wanted to play.”

We are waiting for a taxi to take us back to Yamaku. Passing our summer holidays doing nothing. Enjoying the borrowed time we have. Playing and living.

I think, I think, this is all I wanted. Just to play honestly. The sky is fading amber. She is a flash of scent and honey, tawny and taut, and joy.

She leans her head against mine and begins to snore. There is still a ball in my pocket. I smile.