Digitize = Knight
Wink = Bricko Bat
Enamorang = Bishop
Saber = Zombie Chef

equip off-hand Kramco Sausage-o-Matic™

equip acc3 "I Voted!" sticker

familiar Mini-Hipster (6 lbs)

Use 1 disassembled clover
You acquire an item: ten-leaf clover

[1328] The Haunted Kitchen
Encounter: Government agent
Round 0: Lyft wins initiative!
Round 1: Lyft uses the green smoke bomb and uses the green smoke bomb!
This combat did not cost a turn

[1328] The Haunted Kitchen
Encounter: Nicebox
You acquire an item: brains casserole
You acquire an item: leftovers of indeterminate origin
You acquire an item: ancient frozen dinner

[1329] The Haunted Kitchen
Encounter: Play Misty For Me
You acquire an item: freezerburned ice cube
> queue possessed silverware drawer; paper towelgeist; skullery maid; possessed silverware drawer; Government agent
> turns spent 9

[1330] The Haunted Kitchen
Encounter: Lights Out in the Kitchen
Took choice 893/1: Refuse to Take the Heat
choice.php?pwd&whichchoice=893&option=1

[1330] The Haunted Kitchen
Encounter: giant rubber spider
Round 0: Lyft wins initiative!
Round 1: Lyft casts SAUCESTORM!
Round 2: giant rubber spider takes 60 damage.
Round 2: giant rubber spider takes 60 damage.
Round 2: You lose 12 hit points
Round 2: Lyft casts SAUCESTORM!
Round 3: giant rubber spider takes 60 damage.
Round 3: giant rubber spider takes 60 damage.
Round 3: Lyft wins the fight!
After Battle: You glance in the direction of an inspiring meteor as it arcs across the sky, just as you predicted.
After Battle: You gain 5 Muscleboundness
You acquire an item: rubber nubbin
After Battle: The words POWER UP appear above Square's head as he instantly grows a stupid-looking moustache.
After Battle: You gain 27 Muscleboundness
After Battle: You gain 49 Wizardliness
After Battle: You gain 30 Sarcasm
This combat did not cost a turn

[1330] The Haunted Kitchen
Encounter: zombie chef
Round 0: Lyft wins initiative!
Round 1: Lyft uses the green smoke bomb and uses the green smoke bomb!
This combat did not cost a turn

[1330] The Haunted Kitchen
Encounter: zombie chef
Round 0: Lyft wins initiative!
Adjusted combat item count: green smoke bomb
Round 1: Lyft uses the green smoke bomb and uses the green smoke bomb!
This combat did not cost a turn

[1330] The Haunted Kitchen
Encounter: zombie chef
Round 0: Lyft wins initiative!
Adjusted combat item count: green smoke bomb
Round 1: Lyft uses the green smoke bomb and uses the green smoke bomb!
This combat did not cost a turn

[1330] The Haunted Kitchen
Encounter: SSBBHax
Round 0: SSBBHax says: "you think your shiny medals and doohickeys make you better than us? Well, not wrong.."
Round 0: Lyft wins initiative!
Adjusted combat item count: green smoke bomb
Round 1: Lyft casts SAUCESTORM!
Round 2: time-spinner prank takes 60 damage.
Round 2: time-spinner prank takes 60 damage.
Round 2: Square hops on your back for an ironic piggy-back ride. You feel a little stronger after hauling all of that irony around.
Round 2: You gain 3 Beefiness
Round 2: Lyft wins the fight!
After Battle: A love cockroach scuttles out from beneath a nearby stove and gives you a present from the floor.
You acquire an item: hot powder
You acquire an item: time residue
After Battle: You gain 1 Strengthliness
After Battle: You gain 2 Magicalness
After Battle: You gain 2 Smarm
This combat did not cost a turn

[1330] The Haunted Kitchen
Encounter: terrible mutant
Round 0: Lyft wins initiative!
Round 1: Lyft casts SAUCESTORM!
Round 2: terrible mutant takes 60 damage.
Round 2: terrible mutant takes 60 damage.
Round 2: You lose 10 hit points
Round 2: Lyft casts SAUCESTORM!
glob of undifferentiated tissue is multiusable, but KoLmafia thought it was not
Round 3: terrible mutant takes 60 damage.
Round 3: terrible mutant takes 60 damage.
Round 3: Square teaches you the subtle differences between an ironic moustache and a regular ol' creepy moustache. You feel a little more moxious.
Round 3: You gain 4 Chutzpah
Round 3: Lyft wins the fight!
After Battle: A love cockroach scuttles out from beneath a nearby stove and gives you a present from the floor.
You acquire an item: hot powder
After Battle: You look to the sky just in time to catch a glimpse of a falling star. Lucky! Well, not really lucky, because you totally knew it was going to be there.
You gain 26 Meat
You acquire an item: glob of undifferentiated tissue
After Battle: You gain 31 Fortitude
After Battle: You gain 50 Magicalness
After Battle: You gain 28 Cheek
You gain a Moxie point!
This combat did not cost a turn

[1330] The Haunted Kitchen
Encounter: Witchess Bishop
Round 0: Lyft wins initiative!
Round 1: Lyft casts SAUCESTORM!
Round 2: Witchess Bishop takes 60 damage.
Round 2: Witchess Bishop takes 60 damage.
Round 2: Square hops on your back for an ironic piggy-back ride. You feel a little stronger after hauling all of that irony around.
Round 2: You gain 2 Muscleboundness
Round 2: You lose 12 hit points
Round 2: Lyft casts SAUCESTORM!
Round 3: Witchess Bishop takes 60 damage.
Round 3: Witchess Bishop takes 60 damage.
Round 3: Your opponent is too busy explaining the actual definition of irony to Square to attack this round.
Round 3: Lyft wins the fight!
Your familiar gains a pound: Square, the 2 lb. Mini-Hipster
You acquire an item: Sacramento wine
After Battle: You gain 27 Muscleboundness
After Battle: You gain 55 Wizardliness
You gain a Mysticality point!
After Battle: You gain 28 Sarcasm
This combat did not cost a turn

[1330] The Haunted Kitchen
Encounter: Mob Penguin hitman
Round 0: Lyft wins initiative!
Round 1: Lyft uses the replica bat-oomerang!
Round 2: Square hops on your back for an ironic piggy-back ride. You feel a little stronger after hauling all of that irony around.
Round 2: You gain 3 Muscleboundness
Round 2: Lyft wins the fight!
You gain 444 Meat
You acquire an item: kneecapping stick
You acquire an item: normal barrel
After Battle: You gain 8 Strongness
You gain a Muscle point!
After Battle: You gain 8 Magicalness
After Battle: You gain 7 Roguishness
This combat did not cost a turn

[1330] The Haunted Kitchen
Encounter: sausage goblin
Round 0: Lyft wins initiative!
Round 1: Lyft casts SAUCESTORM!
Round 2: sausage goblin takes 120 damage.
Round 2: sausage goblin takes 60 damage.
Round 2: Square teaches you the subtle differences between an ironic moustache and a regular ol' creepy moustache. You feel a little more moxious.
Round 2: You gain 4 Cheek
Round 2: Lyft wins the fight!
You gain 156 Meat
You acquire an item: magical sausage casing
After Battle: You gain 26 Strengthliness
After Battle: You gain 52 Wizardliness
After Battle: You gain 31 Cheek
This combat did not cost a turn

[1330] The Haunted Kitchen
Encounter: evil ex-girlfriend
Round 0: Lyft wins initiative!
Round 1: Lyft casts SAUCESTORM!
Round 2: evil ex-girlfriend takes 60 damage.
Round 2: evil ex-girlfriend takes 60 damage.
Round 2: Lyft casts SAUCESTORM!
Round 3: evil ex-girlfriend takes 60 damage.
Round 3: evil ex-girlfriend takes 60 damage.
Round 3: Square explains the backlash against the backlash against an indie comic book. See, it got too popular, so now everyone criticizes it, so now the cool thing to do is to like it again. Trying to follow the logic opens new neural pathways in your brain.
Round 3: You gain 3 Enchantedness
Round 3: Lyft wins the fight!
After Battle: You look to the sky just in time to catch a glimpse of a falling star. Lucky! Well, not really lucky, because you totally knew it was going to be there.
After Battle: You gain 21 Fortitude
After Battle: You gain 52 Mysteriousness
After Battle: You gain 33 Chutzpah
This combat did not cost a turn