Hypocrite (Mask #2/9)

I tell people, don't feel bad.

I let them know, no need to be sad, just be glad for all that you have.

Yet as hard as it is to understand, I'm standing on a strand of string feeling if I do one thing wrong I'll be damned and canned, can't fucking speak my mind because that's a crime, why was I designed to be confined to my mind.

You see me smile as I get laughed at, but inside I feel thrashed and like I crashed into a building, blood spilling and the pain is almost thrilling, cause I have a whirlwind of anger inside, like I'm about to go on a killing spree just to feel free and to a degree there's obviously something wrong with me, hell I don't know where I belong, is this like a painful song or like I have undergone a surgery with all my senses working, the pain lurking behind me and then it begins usurping me.

But no no no, have no worries these pains are temporary, infact contrary to what you think, this distinct pain will be gone soon I swear to God they'll be gone next afternoon.

That's a lie

It's all a lie

I want to cry but I feel the need to hold the tears upstairs and it scares me...I'm so afraid that someday I'll end up in a trade with the devil, several levels of mental peril.

A sudden stop

I drop

This nonstop pain

But here we go again, I'll remain and try to sustain my pain in my campaign to contain my pain

'Morning

Like my mask?

I'll give you a warning, the smile's fake.