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Halagini

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Dec 7th, 2019
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  1. ==CLOTHES==
  2. forgotten tomb shirt or another metal shirt
  3. ideally black jeans (see jack rourke), otherwise either blue jeans or gray/camo cargo pants
  4. black converse (for sure, especially due to its alt relevance)
  5. black carhartt jacket
  6. C:\Users\Halagini\Pictures\phone\creepin\amanda\outfit\amanda outfit.png
  7.  
  8. of note is that she clearly sees the value of all black considering the fact i saw her with a gothic aesthetic 10 hours ago as of typing
  9.  
  10. ==REMEMBER==
  11. red creep showed no signs of interest until i did
  12. amanda probably won't ever make it as obvious unless she follows my lead with eye contact
  13. http://archive.is/hC2hG
  14. "A shy girl won't just flirt with anyone, so you can be sure she is interested in you if you see that she tries to flirt back. She may flirt back by making more frequent eye contact"
  15.  
  16. ==THE FOUNDATION HAS BEEN LAID==
  17. by going for red creep that day, you set the foundation for doing it
  18. see retrospectives of real shit
  19. get it into your head that this can happen and you will be doing it, because i've seemed to forget that this will actually be happening
  20. amanda is ~18 and i will be doing everything i can to enter a relationship with her
  21. this is reality
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  40. ===================PLAN===================
  41. -part minus 1-
  42. make friendly eye contact in a prior encounter before doing anything related to getting her number
  43. make eye contact for 1-2 seconds
  44. attempt smile (genuine happiness can lead to this)
  45.  
  46. -part 0-
  47. remember that it's easy as fuck, when i went for red creep it wasn't really that hard, it was mostly external factors
  48. shave day before
  49. ensure cash is in wallet
  50. shave non-lazily on correct day, possibly twice
  51. remember henry with blonde girl
  52. remember that red creep happened because i saw an opportunity and i took it
  53.  
  54. -part 1-
  55. enter store and notice if she's at front register, if she is say hi briefly while smiling
  56. if she's moving clothing racks but near the front entrance, still say hi while walking past
  57. notice how crowded the store is while remaining logical - she will probably be extremely embarrassed if i ask for her number in front of people, so it would by far be best to do it when neither employees or other customers are within hearing range
  58.  
  59. -part 2-
  60. get some shit worth ~$5 - not too much though or it'll take longer to ring me up
  61. be very loose, casual, and smiley - i was feeling like this when i saw her on 9-13-19
  62. go find some shit and once nobody's at the front i can go up, if nobody's there she may be doing other shit which might be a good opportunity to move it since it'll definitely be empty
  63. ^ also make sure that no other employees are around to ring me up
  64. make eye contact immediately once i'm getting ringed up (with a friendly aura, if i do not seem friendly i must smile)
  65.  
  66. -part 3-
  67. say "hey, how's your day going" as an icebreaker because immediately cutting to below would be awkward as fuck if she doesn't hear me
  68. after she responds say "i'm hal btw"
  69. "you must be new here" - start casually discussing how long she's been at the store for (and that i haven't seen her around much until recently), mention that there was someone else in her place but she's gone now
  70. while she's getting the receipt, i should say "by the way, can i get your number?" very clearly while making eye contact
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  92. ===NOTES===
  93. -i have absolutely nothing to lose
  94. -i have no social obligations of any kind
  95. -there is a chance she could say yes
  96. -DO SOMETHING INTERESTING
  97. -if rejected, her skin tone might not be up to snuff
  98. also a reminder i could get her number at almost any time i desire, i already almost did with red creep which was a significant stepping alone
  99. red creep happened because i took the opportunity
  100. new girl new goal
  101.  
  102. bottom line, i am not living right now
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  105. NO REGRETS, JUST DO IT CUNT
  106. DON'T QUESTION ANY PART OF THE PLAN, JUST DO IT
  107. YOUR LIFE CHANGES NO MATTER WHAT THE RESULTS ARE
  108. REMINDER THAT THE LONGER I TAKE, THE LONGER NOTHING CHANGES AND THAT THERE IS ZERO BENEFIT TO WAITING AROUND - SHE IS READILY AVAILABLE
  109. DO IT ASAP, THERE'S ___ZERO___ REASON TO FUCK AROUND
  110. START MOVING TO GET IT DONE ASAP, THERE'S SOME MOMENTUM SO DON'T LET IT STOP
  111. I CAN TELL TWEAK I HAVE A GIRLFRIEND IN A MATTER OF DAYS, JUST FUCKING MOVE IT CUNT
  112. being in the bronx for a few days should motivate me - once this happens, get to it immediately
  113. get it into your head that you're doing it just like i did with red creep - once i started walking, there was no returning
  114.  
  115. LISTEN TO FAR AWAY FOR MOTIVATION - YOU KNOW WHAT I'M TALKING ABOUT MOTHERFUCKER
  116.  
  117. retrospective of 7-12-19.txt
  118. remember all of my dreams involving females
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  121.  
  122. -she listens to alt rock
  123. remember when i wanted a girl who listened to alt rock to the point that i thought of ~30 year old women who did and accepted that this would likely never happen
  124. guess what happened
  125. -her voice is higher pitched than most girls
  126. comparing it to many women on csgo, i've tried to add the audio files into her reminisicent to compare voices and they never match up; hers is always higher than all of the girls i've gone through so far
  127. attractive women are correlated with their voices and strongly prefer masculine men, which equals submissive personalities (as if it wasn't obvious considering the fact that she is the least formidable human on the planet)
  128. i tried to match amandas pitch with csgo girl 3 and went up to 16% and it was STILL lower
  129. it's obvious that she is extremely submissive
  130. -she fulfills a 2006 neo-gothic emo new england aesthetic
  131. -she is canadian
  132. -her name means 'worthy of love' in latin - a sign from god (hence why He pushed red creep away from me)
  133. she was magically present after red creep left which was the only thing to cheer me up in a very long time
  134. non-disgusting alt girls practically no longer exist since 2008, and yet i never got one when i was younger - and here she is, in the present
  135. -she might be able to pull off red hair, look at pink pigmentation - compare it to christy
  136. there's no way to verify
  137. -imagine how her quiet demeanor will contrast against someones hostility
  138. -imagine her and myself in bull maroon
  139. -imagine her massaging my hand like shannon
  140. -i can imagine her petite fingers gently touching me - that is to say, i feel it and her presence
  141. -she will touch my head
  142. -she will walk around the house in pants barefoot
  143. she will totally do this but you can't even comprehend it, think joann
  144. -she will provide footjobs
  145. -she will take off her socks upon entering home if i ask: https://invidio.us/watch?v=dNSi5P817c8 (3:45)
  146. -piercings, converse without socks, bracelets, anklets, chokers, raven colored hair, form fitting parkas, cat ears, etc.
  147. she can do almost anything shown in female specimens
  148. -burnout 3 becomes reality
  149. canadian burnout 3
  150. -i would have loved her during age 3 to age 14
  151. if i showed myself a pic back then saying "this is your first gf" i would chimp out
  152. -imagine her on snowy roads
  153. -imagine her near pc with gothic foliage - it's reality, not only does the time not matter but now IS the perfect time - she is the perfect passage to experiencing what i never did
  154. -imagine being in manhattan and holding her hand while i wear my forgotten tomb shirt, and the guy in the red metal shirt gets takes notice and stares
  155. -imagine driving into manhattan from the bronx in the morning with her while listening to ride (nfsu)
  156. -imagine driving home from the bronx at sunrise with windows down while listening to ruling me
  157. -imagine me taking a piss in bathroom while she lays on my bed, then i come back to my room and climb into bed and snuggle
  158. -imagine her inside zs_stormier or a l4d beta setting
  159.  
  160. -imagine her listening to hand of blood
  161. -imagine her listening to tears don't fall
  162. -imagine her listening to one
  163. -imagine her listening to sleep
  164. -imagine her listening to ride (nfsu)
  165. -imagine her listening to rightside of the bed
  166. -imagine her listening to memory
  167. -imagine her listening to dead living
  168. -imagine her listening to collapse
  169. -imagine her listening to mxpx
  170. -imagine her listening to my curse
  171. -imagine her listening to adrift
  172. -imagine her listening to world so cold
  173. -imagine her listening to raver's fantasy
  174. -imagine her listening to digging a hole
  175. -imagine her listening to https://invidio.us/watch?v=kFRC6r-BBag
  176. -imagine her listening to dirty little secret
  177.  
  178. it's easy to imagine nostalgia in this way
  179.  
  180. consider how many guys are too scared to get straight to the point with a girl, masquerading as their friend because they're too scared of girls both judging them and rejecting them for coming on too strong
  181. realize the advantages you have over other men
  182.  
  183. consider my significant mood boost document - when discussing hs, consider that she is perfect and fulfills the idealistic shit i never had (that my father did) - i can still have it
  184.  
  185. consider the fact that she's shy and effeminate - confident and masculine actions are foreign to her, she doesn't do them and so it provides great contrast between you and her
  186. she's just a girl, that's probably her best trait - she's just female and normal by all biological standards, no fucking around
  187.  
  188. remember how much i desired touches from female teachers - imagine a girl simply walking up to where you're sitting then freely touching you
  189. i can imagine her petite fingers gently touching me - that is to say, i feel it and her presence
  190. it's reality
  191.  
  192. looking at lix vivens feet/hands i can imagine amandas feet/hands when considering her hand texture and nail shape
  193. i imagine them as being really good, i am content with what i imagined for once
  194. https://www.pornhub.com/view_video.php?viewkey=2104971372
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  198. /\-/\-/\-/\-/\-/\
  199. all of this will become a reality if you work to get it, if you do it then it's reality and you have control up until she says yes/no
  200. footjobs are real life, they are sex life, what i felt before is real, they are real and you have the power to make it real
  201. but only if you work towards it
  202. how easy or how hard it is depends on you
  203. /\-/\-/\-/\-/\-/\
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  212. -EXTERNAL IDEA-
  213. thought of this in shower but i could have my father call me to play deathbox on my phone
  214. explain to him in detail that i'm going to get a girls number while wearing my forgotten tomb shirt that clearly indicates my music tastes, while her style of dress also indicates her music tastes (which are similar)
  215. by having him call me so my ringtone plays, it shows her my taste in music and thus something we have in common
  216.  
  217. "so listen, i'm going to get this girls number right now, i'm at the place and i have a quick plan"
  218. "her name is amanda and she's working at the register right now and will be there all day"
  219. "see, by the way she dresses it's extremely obvious she listens to a certain style of music - as much black clothing as her uniform allows, piercings on her face, her hair, black nail polish, and other shit"
  220. "the way she dresses is called alternative and is indicative of her taste in music and other media, so i'm wearing my forgotten tomb shirt which is black and has words in a distinctive visual style that's only used in metal which tells anyone familiar with it this is what i listen to"
  221. "i got the idea to do this some time ago when a completely unrelated girl at walmart who also dressed alternative was staring at my forgotten tomb shirt clearly intrigued, doing the same with this girl is indicative that we have something in common already"
  222. "i also want her to hear my ringtone so she is more intrigued by my taste in music"
  223. "so what i want is for you to call me in about 2 minutes from now while i'm in the store, i'll confirm whether or not i'm with amanda yet and have you call me again when i am"
  224. "when i'm at the desk, if you call me then we will have a very brief conversation not on speaker where you fixed my mothers rear bumper while i confirm i'm at the desk by saying 'yeah i got it'"
  225.  
  226. SECOND PHONE CALL:
  227. Hal: "hey"
  228. Dad: "yeah listen i fixed her bumper"
  229. Hal: "alright good, i'm a little busy now though"
  230. Dad: "are you with her?"
  231. Hal: "yeah alright, i'll see you in a bit"
  232. Dad: "ok bye"
  233. Hal: "bye"
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  242. -SECOND IDEA: MULTIPLE CONVERSATIONS-
  243. i may need to have multiple conversations with her, for others girls i wouldn't give a shit obviously but she is quiet as fuck and may need to open up to me
  244. this is easy if someone pops up behind me which means that it's off the table anyway
  245.  
  246.  
  247. -FIRST DATE-
  248. after i get her number i obviously need to come up with something - ideally it's something private
  249.  
  250. what that thing will be is going for coffee at dunkin donuts (due to a lack of starbucks)
  251. i buy everything obviously
  252.  
  253. it's easy, neutral, and provides a quick getaway unlike dinner which is more restraining if things go south
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