Day Game Model
1.Opener
2.Rambling (filled with small and big bait) (a) Follow up (b) Elderly Chat (c) She asks a personal question
3.Closing

Vocab
IOI - Indicator of Interest
IOO - Indicator of Openness
Cat - The girl during the day.
Elder Opener - A opener where the person opening ask a question that he probably already knew the answer to or that he didn’t actually need an answer in an attempt to start a conversation that goes in many different direction.
Personal Questions - questions to find out someone’s beliefs, hobbies, or background

IOI’s during the day:
Personal Questions
Smiling at you
Deeply staring at you

IOO’s during the day
Scanning the room
Eye contact

Openers: Excuse me…
Is that the new iPhone G7?
Is that a good bag?
Is that a good pen? (when she’s writing in a diary or paper)
Is it hard to write in cursive?

DAY GAME:
Is indirect and non-cocky
Requires high levels of seemingly "boring" chatter
Uses absurdly simple openers
Does not involve asking personal questions early on
Delays flirting until the end
Uses the "yes ladder" to reduce flakiness

The person who moves the least (i.e., the person who reacts the least) will often be perceived
as the one with more social status.

A good correlator to seeing a girl again that you met during the day it’s a lot easier to tell if a number will lead to a date or not. Simply multiple the number of personal questions she asks you by the length of conversation in minutes. Anything over 100 means at least a 50% chance of seeing her again, which are great odds.

Chapters
1.Preparations
2.Opening
3.Rambling
4.Closing
5.The Coffee Shop
6.The Street
7.The Clothing Store
8.The Bookstore
9.Public Transportation
10.The Grocery Store
11.Other Venues
12.Putting It All Together

PREPARATION

Before we dive into the actual model we will use to approach women during the day let this chapter prepare you for the work you’re about to undertake.

1.1 The Reality Of Day Game

Cold approaching is perhaps the most labor-intensive method to get dates but it's one that consistently works.

Assuming you have weak game and average conversational skills, you’ll get a number from 5% of your day approaches. The average is 7.5% (since some guys already have night game experience). Which months of practice on your part you should be able to achieve 20% number close.

Men hit a ceilings after several years and can't seem to go higher no matter what but it will always be a higher possible rate if you didn't practice game.

If you find a niche day venue you can double your close rate (bookstores and coffee shops 50% number close rates are not uncommon)

No matter how amazing your day game gets you won't be able to get more than an overall 40% close rate. This is because most women are in a serious relationship, have a sex buddy, are in a bad mood from PMS, are homosexual, or are experiencing a herpes flare up that makes them suicidal. Only 40% of girls at any point are even open to talking to a guy and a percentage of those will never want to go out with you on a date.

Even if your game is tight you still will get blown off. Even if you’re a famous singer of a rock and roll band you still could get rejected. A girl has to be in the right state of mind to even receive your game. A game based on abundant approaches will get you the best results.

As your game improves in time you'll be able to approach less while getting more than before. But it’s impossible to avoid the numbers game unless you have some special gimmick or status. Tight game combined with a gimmick or status will get you rock star numbers. A gimmick or status without game will get you only as much as a guy with game. Learning game will boost the amount of success with women.

Game is an efficient tool for getting access to women (numbers and dates). She must be OPEN for you to use your game tools. If she isn't you'll have to keep going until you find a girl who is. Especially early on, when progress is slow a belief of “I must keep going” will give you the strength to stay committed until you start seeing results.

Consistency requires at least 2 hours a week to daytime approaches. If you can't do the bare minimum then just stop now. Just like learning an instrument or taking on a new hobby you must block out chunks of time in order to get good at it. It's silly to think that you can get your dream girl on your first approach.

The passive man uses day game as a little supplement. The active man goes out for the main purpose to hit on girls, especially early in his development. He's a man on a mission, motivated to learn, no matter what the cost.

1.2 Differences Between Day & Night Game

At night you can run complex openers with success. You can do something like a female opinion opener and give a mini speech before the girl is expected to give you an answer. During the day complex openers came across as weird. She will wonder why you're talking to her and how much longer she will have to hear your routine.

At night girls show more interest sooner. During the day they're much less likely to show interest, even if they're actually in to you. For example, at night a girl may, “What do you do?” even if she’s not interested in you. But during the day that same question is a huge IOI.

At night it's more natural for the girl to flirt, tease, and use double entendres (things that have a hidden meaning).

During the day it's rare to get very flirtatious and force on your part to force it is the fastest way to push her away.

Even if a girl is capable of daytime flirting it's likely she isn't in the social mood. At moment you engage her. She could’ve just woken up or gotten into a texting battle. During the day a girl needs more time to get into a relaxed, fun state than if she was at a bar and oftentimes that state NEVER comes. With some girls you won’t even know if they’re capable of flirting until you get them out on a date.

At night girls expect you to talk to them so they have up a titanium shield to defend against your advances.

During the day girls don't expect you to talk to them, so when you do they're surprised.

In many chick flicks the girl meets the guy of her dreams during a daytime situation. It's due to this silly fantasy, which has been installed on western girls since they were teens, that you'll need much less to get a girl out on a date after a day meeting.

Ever ten minutes you talk to a girl during the day is worth one hour of night conversation. The novelty of a day pickup puts you above other guys she met the past weekend at the club, even those she talked to at length.

At night girls act in a way they think is more sexually attractive. During the day they act more natural and flawed. It's hard for a girl to fake who she is when she hasn't been drinking, especially since they’re no friends around to put on appearances for.

A girl you meet at day will jump a full point in looks when you get her out on a date. If you met her during the night it usually only gets worse.

During the day the most physical touch will be a handshake or light arm touches.

During the day you ease into game because you're essentially a stranger off the street. You need to let her know that you're a normal guy not a jerk or any type of threat.

During the day an approach will rarely be longer than 15 minutes and rare that a girl will get lost in the moment during a daytime approach.

During the day girls are like cats. Cats will be scared off if you immediately run up to it. You have to let the girl slowly warm up to you. They are sensitive to not only how you approach but also to the content of your game.

Don't Be Cocky Or Direct 1.3

Being cocky at night may be super effective but during the day it scares the cat away. Even lightly teasing is a big risk (unless you're towards the very end of conversation and the number is in the bag and she's opening up to you).

Being cocky is not valued during the day. It's okay to be humorous and playful, but only if it's not at her expense.

Another quality that is less valued during the day is being direct. By direct, I mean stating your immediate intention that you want to get to know her on a personal level.

Direct gamesmen get numbers, but they get few dates from pretty girls as a result. You can’t skip the connection building process, because a connection is what it takes to get girls out on dates.

This day game model is overkill if you’re just trying to get numbers but to be in the business of getting dates you need to get the number in a way that maximizes the likelihood of seeing the girl again. That mean approaching indirectly, treating her like a cat (letting her warm up to you), letting her show interest, and then getting the phone number in a natural way that increases both rapport and attraction.

The indirect model is the most favorable way to meet women during the day because it leads to more dates instead of just numbers.

If you want to experiment with direct game, do so toward the end of the conversation. You can say “Actually I’m a liar, I wasn’t looking for a pet shop (if you used that opener). I just wanted to talk to you.” Resist referencing her beauty in your direct material because you don’t want her to think she has higher value than you. If she likes you, that line won’t hurt. I hope you can see how grossly unnecessary it is to state your intentions. I (the author) don’t do it because it spoils the tensions I created with my indirect opener and leaves no room for doubt my intentions.

I (author) try to let girls read between the lines instead of serving my intentions on a silver platter.

The only time acceptable to go direct is if you're short on time. The likelihood you will see her again is low.

The bottom line is that there are girls who will reject your direct game that would have eventually dated you had you gone indirect, but not the other way around. If you approach a girl indirectly that you could have gone direct on, the only difference is that it will take a little longer to seal the deal, but on the flip side, you build a stronger connection. Because of this reason alone, it’s simply a better bet to have a default game that’s indirect. Direct game is fun to mess around with on the side but when I’m serious about getting dates I (author) stay indirect, both night and day.

1.4 The Optimal Daygame Mindset

Hello, I just want to have an innocent little chat, and through that chat, cool and interesting things about me will leak out. At the end of the chat I’m going to to give you a chance to continue the interaction at another time. If you don’t take advantage of that, it’s your loss. There are a lot of girls out there I’ve yet to talk to.

That’s the mindset I want you to think about when approaching during the day, of having little innocent chats with girls you find attractive. The value that you display (DHV), your coolness, and interestingness, is the primary force that leads to dates. Without that value, your close rate will be low. While it’s possible to play video games eighteen hours a day and still get dates with game it’s much easier if you have an interesting life. It’s no surprise that in the process of tightening your game you become a more interesting man. It’s a positive feedback loop where getting dates makes you cooler and becoming cooler get you more dates.

Don’t have to much respect for girls who have not proved it (many girls are not virtuous women). Putting a girl on a pedestal is counterproductive when trying to get her on a date. Don’t treat a girl better than you treat your family or friends. Don’t go rearranging your entire schedule to see her, because I guarantee she’s not doing the same for you. Only be respectful of a girl who earns it.

The guys who excel at game all share one trait (abundance mentality). They don’t highly value women. They have a belief that women are everywhere, so there’s no point to value a specific girl who doesn’t value them first. Again, this doesn’t mean you hate women, but it means withholding your more caring and sensitive nature until she puts work into a relationship.

1.5 Approach Courage
Almost every man in the world has two fears: a fear of judgement and a fear of death. The former is why the thought of approaching a woman puts your body into a classic fight-or-flight response.

Imagine getting rejected very badly and you’re being mocked by the girl and people around you. There’s no saber-tooth tiger gnawing through your flesh. There’s no grizzly bear with its jaws clamped around your neck.  You’re still alive and no closer to dying that you were a few moments ago. Your ego took a nuclear hit, sure, but in just a couple days more likely a couple hours you’ll start to forget what happened, and life will go on.

You most likely won’t be ready for the optimal mindset about only wanting to have a little chat in your first few approaches. Instead, you need to have the rejection mindset where you imagine the absolute worst possible case, accept it in your mind, and then do the approach anyway.

Every day spend at least 10 minutes playing “worst case” rejection movies in your head, where you catastrophize the outcome of approaches in the venues you frequent. Be imaginative about them. Go into your first approaches with the thought that everyone will erupt in laughter, most especially the girl. You’ll accept the emotionally painful outcome, take a deep breath, and then proceed with the approach anyway, because you’re a man who is trying to get dates. When you do the approach nothing horrible will happen. On average about 1 out of 70 approaches will be mean to you. That is only 1.4% a very small percentage.

You’re probably too self-absorbed. You think you’re important. You think people actually care enough to form opinions about you based on what you do in the venue. In a random stranger’s world your mistake may get a chuckle, but five minutes later you will essentially be erased from their memory.

The truth is that no one take notice about you. Be flattered if they do, even if it’s not an entirely  positive impression, because you entered their world when there are a thousand other things fighting for their attention. Breaching a girl’s reality is the first step before attempting to build a connection that may result in a date. The point of game is to go from an insignificant stranger to someone with a history, with interests, with a story, someone worthy of a date. These day’s I’m not scared of being rejected, I’m scared of not being noticed (author).

Remember the “worst case” rejection movies in your head. Have a smile on your face and make eye contact with everyone who’s mocking you. The higher you hold your head up, the quieter the coffee shop grows. No one is laughing now. Everyone is returning to their work, and even if you see those people against, they’ll only have a vague recollection of who you are.

In every scenario there’s the best outcome, the worst outcome (what I’ve just described), and the most likely outcome, which is so ordinary that you should be hard on yourself for hesitating even on second on your approaches. The most likely outcome is that a girl politely ends a conversation with you. Again remember that in most of your approaches, a girl will nicely end the chat by continuing to do what she was doing before you started talking. Pretty brutal, huh?

If you have an extreme case of approach anxiety, which I’ve (author) have observed in about 10% of men, then you may have to play these rejection movies for a longer period of time instead of the couple weeks an “average” guy has to. Either way, don’t skip this step, because it’s an important part in desensitizing you to approaches. In short time, the thought of approaching should no longer affect your state.

Let’s play another movie in your mind. Imagine that the same coffee shop approach but now you’re viewing it through the eyes of a spectator. You can see yourself saying the opening line and you can see the girl reacting. In your movie, the girl  responds politely but not warmly, and then gets back to her work after half a minute or so. As a spectator, how many minutes will it take for you to forget what you just saw. Not many, I (author) assure you.

Now Let’s play one final movie. With the same approach, I want you to imagine you’re a king on a rocket ship, blasting off right above the the coffee shop. With the roof of the coffee shop peeled away you can see your earthly self below, talking to the girl as the rocket propels you into space. Five seconds in, you and the girl are little ants, surrounded by hundreds of thousands of other ants. A couple of seconds later you can only see buildings and hills, which stretch into the horizon as far as you can see. Only ten seconds after that, the city you were in is but a black dot with other black dots crowding around it. Soon you’re close to the moon and can see nothing but clouds and oceans. This king movie should serve as a reminder of how insignificant an approach really is. In the grand scheme of things, one approach is nothing but a grain of sand on a large beach, so don’t give it more importance than it deserves. Give importance for the meaningful things in life, like a first kiss, marriage, or graduation, but not a little chat with a random girl who most likely isn’t even your type.

Once you get over the hurdle of approaching, the next step is to reframe how you view rejection. It’s true that a rejection means a girl doesn’t want you in her life. You mean nothing to her. She doesn’t even want to get to know you. My response to that is… so what? Just because an attractive girl doesn’t want to get to know you, it doesn’t mean your value is low. If that was the case, I’d (the author) be one of the biggest losers on the planet. Whether I am or not, it doesn’t feel that way when I do succeed which I wouldn't if I hadn’t approached and endured prior rejections. My (the author) value as a man comes from the successes I’ve had. They serve me as my strongest memories, helping make my life enjoyable and pleasurable.

Remember that even if your game is perfect, and you do everything right after adding stronger moves of your own, you’ll still get rejected at least 60% of the time. Embrace the rejection, love it, and cherish it, because it won't change. If you hate going to the bathroom bad news because you will be doing that for the rest of your life. You deal with that without much complaint, so embrace rejection in the same way.

1.6 Optimizing Your Beliefs

6 mindsets to have
1.With a rejection I've gained more knowledge in getting what I want. It wasn't a rejection it was a learning opportunity.

2.Rejection isn't a big deal. There are a lot worse things that could happen to me. I could be blind and starving.

3.With this rejection I've only just begun. Consistency makes progress, and I'll keep going.

4.This rejection has put me closer than I've ever been to success. The law of averages say so.

5.I accept my limitation in not being everything to every woman. I will keep going until I find a girl who likes my vibe.

6.How important will this rejection be on day from now, one month from now, or one year from now? Will I ever remember it?


Understand that you’re not a mind reader. You don’t know what she’s thinking while she’s talking to you and you don’t know what else is going on in her life that may restrict her ability to get to know you. There’s absolutely no use trying to guess why things didn’t work base on the limited information she gave you. Controlling your own behavior and thought processes is hard enough so don’t complicate matter by trying to be a psychic. Instead adopt believe that promote action and then focus on making those actions the best you’re capable of.

1.7 The Model Approach

After a couple dozen approaches, you’ll start to feel more comfortable having day time chats. You’ll be nervous at time, but you’ll no longer be afraid (if you were). At this point you want to move from visualizing failure to visualizing solid effort.

Let’s edit our original coffee shop movie where you got laughed at by everyone. You’re talking to a girl who maintains eye contact with a neutral expression on her face. She stops what she’s doing to focus on you and crack a friendly smirk after your follow up. She doesn’t realize (or care) that other people may be trying to eavesdrop on the chat. I want you to fast forward through a long conversation, one that gets deeper with each passing minute. Laughs and information are being exchanged, and toward the end you touched her gently on the forearm. The movie is going so fast that at least ten minutes of conversation have gone by, though it feels like much less time. Then everything slows down again for you to hear her say, “What’s your name?” You hear a snap, like two lego blocks locking into place, and you know the number is in the bag. When you contact her in a couple of days, she’s enthusiastic about seeing you again.

The above will be your success movie, the one you visualize after the thought of approaching no longer stirs up fear and thoughts of hesitation. Playing this movie when you’re still anxious, though, won’t spur you into action. Visualizing success when you’re still stuck on getting over anxiety will actually demotivate you, which is why I want you to graduate to this movie only after a good dose of experience.

It’s normal for your anxiety level to fluctuate during your development. If you haven’t approached in a while, perhaps after a monogamous relationship, your first approach back may be excruciatingly hard. Or maybe you’re in an unfamiliar environment you’ve yet to succeed in or are gaming in a new language and don’t have the same confidence level that you have in your native language. In these cases, simply go back to playing your rejection movie in your head until you can rack up enough approached to shift back to playing the success movie.

Don’t try to shortcut the learning process by skipping the rejection movie. High anxiety must be addressed before you can concern yourself with getting dates, because it can cause a severe drop in performance to the point where you can’t focus on correct game principles. Low to medium anxiety is actually optimal for the best performance since it gives a man enough vigor to make what he’s doing a conscious, thoughtful process.

Any goal worth striving for must stir your being at least a little. Zero arousal is actually a detriment to your performance and probably a guarantee that the girl you’re thinking of talking to is ugly or fat. You should be slightly nervous when approaching a girl. That’s how I (author) judge if I should approach or not. If I feel a bit of tension in my chest from an increased heart rate, then I know I must approach. I push aside all excuses that may pop up, then begin making sounds with my voice box.

OPENING

The model makes two assumptions. The first is that you’re an average guy. Your looks are about average, your conversational skills are average, your style is average, and your life is average.
If you’re below average in any of those qualities, you’ll have to compensate by being strong in the others. However, if you’re above average on multiple fonts, you’ll kill. The second assumption of model is that the girl is alone (excluding pets). It’s no easier talking to a pair of girls during the day than a pair at night, and in many cases it’s harder since isolation is all but impossible.


During the day you won’t have to deal with people interfering as much and random stuff like that.

The model has three components. The first is the opener. It’s something basic and natural that doesn’t scare the cat away. The second component is rambling, where we build attraction by being interesting instead of cocky. Using juicy pieces of bait, we’re going to to display our value in a casual way that intrigues her and make her want to learn more. The last component is GALNUC, a system that personalizes the interaction and helps you get the number (or more).

2.1 The Opener
The purpose of the opener is to break the ice and allow a conversation to happen. It is not to build attraction. You’re not trying to score brownie points (recognition) with it and if you’re thinking of way to come up with a good opener, chances are you’re trying too hard and will end up scaring the cat. Witty openers are best suited for a nighttime environment. During for the day go for boring. The more boring the better. All that matter is if the opener give you a way to continue the conversation so you can then start to add dashes of seasoning (conversational bait).

The style of opener to use is what we’ll call the elderly opener. An elderly approach is what the author calls when an person asked him a question that he probably already knew the answer to or that he didn’t actually need an answer in an attempt to start a conversation that goes in many different directions.

An example of the original elderly opener was when the an old man in a coffee shop asked if the authors laptop was good for example but branched out to the old man's military experience.

The elderly opener was widely used by elderly people who wanted to have a chat and realized a great way to do it was to open on a prop.

The reason the author allowed these conversations to happen wasn’t because he wanted to date the old people, but because he was open to having a chat with an interesting person.

The one precondition we need when hitting on girls during the day: she has to be open to having a chat with another human being, regardless of that person’s age or appearance. We don’t need her to be bubbly and friendly from the beginning, but we do need her to hold eye contact and to participate in the conversation. Disclaimer: Don’t confuse being “open” with being instantly attracted to you. The attraction stuff comes much later in the conversation.

The elder opener is a harmless question related to some type of prop or unique feature in the environment you’re both sharing. It’s open ended enough so that after the girl replies “yes” or “no” it’s expected she will explain in further detail. It’s not personal in nature meaning it doesn’t attempt to gain info about her beliefs, hobbies, or background. Through the elderly opener you want to announce you’re a normal man who isn’t a bum, pervert, or a hippie asking her to sign a petition. You’re opener communicates “Hey, I’m not a weirdo, I just need a little info. Don’t be afraid.” Since the only time she actually converses with strangers during the day is with clerks, waiters, or salesperson using an elder opener will likely be the only normal daytime interaction she’s had with a stranger in weeks.

The individual venues will have specific opening lines to use.

Imagine you’re in a coffee shop, sitting one table over from a girl who has a large piece of luggage. It’s obvious she’s about to take a strip. The true elderly opener is, “Excuse me, is that a good bag?” The wrong opener is “Are you taking a trip” (it’s personal in nature and has a high chance of scaring that cat away). After asking the elderly opener you would continue about it’s durability, material, wheel stability, volume, and everything else a man who is shopping for a piece of luggage might ask. You can touch the bag itself as a way to express your curiosity about its construction. You can also ask if she finds the bag more suitable for longer or shorter trips.

After talking about the bag for a couple of minutes, you’d then say something like, “On my last trip to Scandinavia, my luggage didn’t hold up well because…” and then you’d describe why it wasn’t useful on the journey. If the girl was open to chatting then you would discuss travel. You can later find out her destination and make a couple of interesting comments about what you know about that city, dropping additional cities you’ve visited to make her curious. Yet in the first couple minutes after the opener, there is no game involved. You’re just having a normal conversation about some type of prop.

You’re opener is nothing more than a test to indirectly ask the girl if she's capable of having a regular chat. If so you’ll reward her with more interesting topics.

To lower the girl’s guard use self deprecating humor.

Of course eventually you’ll eventually want to segue out of the elder opener chat, because even the most experienced man in the world can only talk about luggage for so long, but it’s critical that you start the chat on this harmless prop.

A girl who is in a serious relationship or anti-social mood won’t be open to having even the most innocent chat about pens or handwriting. If I’m open to chatting with an old man, there’s no reason why a female shouldn’t have an innocent chat with a non-threatening man. Again, these elderly openers and chat about everyday props are tests to see if she’s open. Just because she’s open to talking doesn’t mean she’s open to a date. But it’s necessary before you can even think about injecting your game.

If a cute girl makes eye contact with you that's a guaranteed chat. If she smiles at you, you can probably open with a simple “How are you?” and get her number with very little effort.

A slightly less reliable indicator of openness is how often she looks around the room. If a girl is scanning the room not only is she likely to be open, but she’s probably single, too.

If a girl is sighing or yawning loudly, or rustling through her papers in an exaggerated way. She’s trying to get someone to notice her.

If a girl is glued to her laptop screen estimate there's about a 33% chance of her being open.
If she’s scanning the room regularly, increase that to 50%.
If she made eye contact, make it 66% chance she open to chatting.

Remember approach any girl you want even if they don’t give an indicator of openness.

Don’t make aggressive eye contact with girls during the day, because doing so will convey heavy interest and make your elderly opener less believable. It’s okay to periodically glance around, but don’t fish for eye contact as your determining factor of whether you should approach or not.

Again if you find a girl attractive approach her regardless of the signals she’s putting out. In the worst case, you’ll gain experience. In the best case you can go out with her on a date.

2.2 Opener Mechanics
A girl isn’t expecting to be approached during the day, she’ll have some initial doubt as to whether you're actually talking to her or not. To fix this speak louder than you normally would and precede the opener with, “Excuse me.”

Speaking loud is also a great way to mask mild anxiety. She’s being so bombarded by your strong words that her brain is distracted from your shaky hand or sweat beads gathering on the tip of your nose. It’s when you speak softly and she can barely hear you that she starts to focus on your flaws. She scans your faults when you’re not capturing her attention with the proper volume. Early in the conversation she may pretend she heard you rather than ask you to repeat yourself, so make sure you look her in the eyes and elevate your voice.

You may be concerned that other people can hear you during your approaches, especially since you’re suppose to speak loud. The loud music in a bar or club acts a privacy filter, but in the subway you may have a dozen spectators eavesdropping on your game. Earlier I told you that men have two main fears: the fear of judgement and the fear of death. Caring about what other think ties into the judgement fear, so let’s nip that in the bud right now. Imagine that all those spectators already think you’re the biggest loser in the world. They’ve already laughed for hours at your expense, already updated their blogs with how much of a tool you are, and generally think you’re a worthless person that brings zero value to the human race. When they’re feeling down on their own lives, they think of you just to make themselves feel better. It’s truly impossible for them to think any lower of you than they already do. After you imagine that movie a couple dozen times it will train you to release the fear of judgement, not only with hitting on women, but in other areas of your life as well. Reality is nothing like the worse case movies. The average male spectator will resent you for having the courage while he doesn’t while the average female spectator will wish that more normal guys would approach her during the day. Then after ten seconds they will go back to what they were doing, and you’ll be forgotten shortly thereafter.

Don’t be surprised if you get enough experience to where you actually prefer an audience to make the approach more exciting.

The second technique you want to use is to always precede your opener with, “Excuse me.” It lets the cat know you’re not going to offend or humiliate her. Most importantly, it gets her attention. Otherwise she may think you’re talking on your phone with a bluetooth. A case where it’s optional is when you’re sharing the same table in a coffee shop, since whatever you say will automatically get her attention. Saying “Excuse me” get your mind ready to make the full effort to have a conversation instead of throwing out random comments like, “It’s cold outside” in the hope she’ll do the work for you. It forces you to go all-in and fully commit to the approach. “Excuse me” is polite, but don’t overdo it by apologizing. While you can say, “Excuse me for interruption,” don’t say, “I’m sorry for interrupting.” More importantly, don’t ask for her permission to deliver your opener by asking, “Are you busy? Can I ask you something?” Once she looks at you after saying “Excuse me” go right into the opener.

With the elderly opener you’re going to be asking a question that you most likely don’t need an answer to, so some acting will be necessary. I don’t mean acting by accentuating certain words or using exaggerated expressions, like how a mother would talk to her baby, but by coming across as believable.

When asking for help or opinions have a slightly confused look with your eyebrows scrunched and eyes slightly squinted. One thing you don’t do is smile.


Imagine a young man asking you, “Is that a good bag?” with a big cheesy grin on his face. If you’re like me, you’ll probably think he doesn’t really care about the bag and that he’s actually a homosexual.

Smiling will kill your approach before it even gets started because it reliably scares the cat. There’s no reason to smile unless you’re saying something sarcastic or responding to a funny joke. A good rule of thumb is that a smile shouldn’t show on your face until you see one on her first.

Believable acting dictates that you stay on the opening topic for at least two or three minutes before venturing on to other subjects. If you ask a girl about her travel bag, then ask where she’s from twenty seconds later, you make your entire approach fraudulent, raising her guard and sharply decreasing that the conversation will last more than another minute.

One way to help your approach come across as natural is to have a low style of speech with a flat tone. Some guys may feel that they need to add flair to the elderly opener but that’s the fastest way to morph it into the senile elder opener. There’s no need to stress random words.

Keep your tone flat for the first few minutes, at least until she varies her own tone, so that you come across as relaxed and cat-friendly as possible. (See how the author speaks in his videos). I (author) deliver my jokes and sarcasm either deadpan or with a slight smirk.

During the day pauses make the approach sound genuine and believable. You get no bonus points for being smooth and polished.

If you’re trying to come across as flawless and have masterfully rehearsed long conversational pieces, you’re increasing the chance that girls think you’re merely “hitting” on them.

Understand that you most likely will go blank. For ten seconds you may just be looking at her in silence, waiting until my brain sends you something, and when it does, the words start flowing again. Her conversation with you will be far from perfect so there’s no reason for you to expect perfection from yourself. You’re not a machine and neither is she.

When it comes to body positioning face her directly with a normal, erect posture, which means no slouching and no pussing out your chest. Stand at least four feet away from her if possible, unless it can’t be helped, like in coffee shops where you’re in fixed chairs. More on proximity later for individual venues, but you should be standing much farther than you would be with a girl in a bar. Don’t stand close to the girl during day approaches (you’ll do nothing but scare the cat). As long as she can hear you, you won’t hurt your chances by standing a bit farther away. In fact, the farther away you stand, the more likely she’ll be able to show subtle interest by talking a half step closer to you. By standing close, you don’t allow her to give you this clue on your progress.

Maintain normal eye contact. By normal, I mean don’t try to stare through her or gaze into her eyes. When starting an approach, you want to be able as plain as you can so she thinks you’re a regular guy who isn’t a threat. Since you want to make the cat feel that you’re safe, refrain from pursing your lips and giving off a sexy smirk. Also refrain from high-energy movements that make her wonder why you’re so worked up just to ask a basic question. The more vanilla you can be, the more likely you’ll relax her enough for a longer conversation.

Not all girls will be alone during the day. To convince you not to bother with pairs or larger groups, here are the two most common outcomes if you do decide to approach them.

The first is that the girls become paralyzed, unsure how they should act for fear of what their friend(s) might think. If you approach a pair of girls in a coffee shop, they can be much less friendly than they would have been alone, since they don’t want the other friend to think they’re “easy” girl who flirts with any guy no matter the time or place. I’m sure you couldn’t care less what you wingman thinks about your approaches, but girls are hyper-aware of being judged by each other and will be more reserved as a result. It also happens that one girl is subliminally dominated by the uglier girl, looking to her for permission on whether she should be talking to you or not. Both will be colder as a result.

The second common outcome is when the girls are exceedingly friendly. You’ll be thinking, “This is great! They love me!” But then the conversation suddenly ends, almost as if it was planned. In this case, the girls were in a social mood and ready to chat with any guy who used a proper elderly opener, but the fear of being judged by the friend kicked in by the five-minute mark and they started having their own chat. If you’re in a clothing store or bookstore, wait until the girls split up until approaching so you can out of there with a number before the friend returns to interrupt the conversation.

Do you best to avoid pairs, no matter how hot the girls may be, because logistically it’s just a pain in the butt. Pairs are fine at night, but awful during the day.


2.3 Her Initial Response
Even if you have the ideal cat-friendly approach with the correct body language and proximity, there’s still no guarantee that she’ll want to indulge in a conversation. About 60% of girls at any time won’t be open to chatting with you, but since you won’t be getting a 40% close rate just beginning, what can you conclude about girls who were single but still didn’t want to interact with you?

Two main factors determine the reception you’ll get from women: your attractiveness and you essence. I’m sure you already understand that good-looking guys are better received, so there’s no need to belabour that point.

By essence, I mean the feeling she gets after a couple seconds of exposure to you. Girls are a lot better than men are at sizing up people, so before you’re even done say “Excuse me,” she’ll already have categorized you, whether it’s a James Dean badass, corporate nice guy, artist type, hipster, shy guy, or what have you. If she pegs you into a category that isn’t her type, she won’t be open. If she’s lukewarm about you essence, but you don’t meet her minimum attractiveness standards, she won’t be open. If you come across as old and doesn’t like older guys, she won’t be open, either. Sometimes getting a low responsiveness rate is due to factors beyond your control such as age and race. If you’re getting initial responses that are mostly negative, consider the correctness of your approach, your appearance, the essence you’re putting out, and your target selection.

Your style is important and will definitely impact a girl’s openness. Will the type of girl you like be more or less receptive if you wore khakis and a blue button-down versus a drooping v-neck shirt with an old leather jacket? For the girls you want, figure out the clothing stores they frequent and then shop there. Examples are corporate type of girl, shop conservative at J. Crew or Macy’s. If you like hipster chicks, try vintage shops. Take the basic steps to match the vibe your ideal girl has. To receive good initial responses, you have to dress the part and dress well.

The main point I want you to take away from this chapter is that opening girls during the day involves no game. Think how to come across as boring and relaxed with a general look that fits into the category of men your ideal girl likes. Remember, you’re just being a normal, safe guy, trying to start an innocent conversation, As of right now we’re only using basic social skills, and it’s not until we get deeper into the chat that we’ll start using game techniques.

RAMBLING

Rambling is the term used to describe a long-winded style of conversation (little to say but takes a while to say it) where the main objective is to get a girl to ask you a personal question. It starts with what you say after the opener, also known as the follow up.

3.1 The Follow-Up And Beyond
The follow-up is an attempt to gain more information from your opener. Earlier examples showed how you must “ramble” on about an opening topic at length, not only to determine if the girl is open or not, but also to make help more comfortable chatting with you.

In your ramble will be two types of bait: small and big.

Small pieces of bait are statements, opinions, intriguing observations, jokes, or facts. Early in the conversation they will be related to your opener. The goal of small bait is to keep the conversation going by allowing her to respond easily.

Big bait is an interesting and personal fact that makes you who you are, such as a hobby or foreign country you’ve visited.

Big bait offer a more direct link to getting her to ask a personal question, which will be your green light to escalate the encounter. Your principle form of initial ramble for the first couple of the approach is “elderly chat,” where you keep the conversation non-personal in nature. Toward the end of your approach you’ll move into personal chat, a second form of ramble that, as you may guess, is personal in nature. The middle parts of the approach will contain a mixture of both chat elements.

If you eavesdrop on an hour-long conversation between two women, you’ll notice that only about 5% of what they say people would consider interesting. The rest is mindless chatter. For women, talking is a means to no particular end, while a conversation between men is almost entirely designed to convey information. Women mostly talk just to talk. While men mostly talk with a purpose in mind.

Dropping small bait can be best described as pointless talking because you’ll talk on about props you find to be mostly meaningless, but understand that it’s through this that a woman begins to feel comfortable with other people.

Only by pointlessly talking about a prop for three minutes will the girl be ready to talk about other topics you may be more interested in, which will then help you get to know her on a deeper level. This is a necessary component of building rapport with women during the day.

During the initial stages of the conversation it’s important to remain on your opening topic for at least two minutes. If you open with “Is that a good bag?” and then ask, “So what are your favorite cities in the world?” only thirty seconds later, she’ll know that you didn’t care about the bag and just wanted to hit on her. While remaining on the opening topic keep things non-personal.

Don’t make the mistake of going personal or being cocky to early because usually the girl will give you about twenty to sixty seconds of “niceness” before ending the conversation.

In later chapters on specific venues, I’ll (author) give you ways to stay on the opening topic, but for now understand that in the beginning of the approach you’re just having an elderly chat about some type of prop or neutral subject.

Most guys think they’re talking to a girl longer than they really were. Solve this problem by timing yourself at home rambling about a random object or periodically glancing at your watch or cell phone in conversation.

It doesn’t matter if a girl doesn’t give you much to work with. Early in the conversation it will be rare for a girl to hit you with sentences longer than five words. As long as she’s making eye contact with you and not turning her body away, KEEP GOING. She’s not going to ask you to keep going. You have to push forward by continuing the chat about your topic as long as she’s there no matter how ridiculous you think it sounds.

Understand that your entire delivery must be flat and slow. Smile only after she does. There’s no way in the world the girl will think you're faking a conversation as long as you firmly remain committed to your topic, deeply exploring it to get her opinions. This may seem bizarre but to the average girl, who only has homeless men talk to her, your topic will not only be interesting, but it will also make her feel safe.

Towards the end of the elder chat the girl may start giving her opinion. You’ll know when a girl is throwing out bait since it’ll be very easy to continue the conversation. This is how a natural conversation proceeds.

Something that seems like ridiculous rambling to men is comfort building to women.

3.2 Elderly Chat

After the follow-up you’ll find yourself having an elderly chat, an innocent conversation where you draw upon your knowledge and experiences to make statements and ask non-personal question. This is something old people excel at. They can have an hour chat stemming from ice cream flavor because their life experience is so deep that they can seamlessly and casually connect it to a dozen other topics.

During the day think of yourself as a wandering, slightly confused old man who needs to gain information or knowledge. Even if you’re capable of making a decision still ask for help even if it makes you look simple.

Being a little lost or confused actually aids conversation. Not only will a girl want to help you, but she may explain things on a more detailed level. Then it will just be a matter of time until you move the conversation from the boring prop to something that’s easier for you to talk about.

Remember the opener is meant to see if a girl is open and to build rapport.

A example of small bait might be if you ask a girl if her book is good and she replies “I’ve read a lot of book by this author before.” She’s baiting you because now you can ask what type of books the author has written, who the author is, and why she likes that particular author. Her statement contains a lot of hooks that you can bite on.

Now imagine you’re at the grocery store and you ask a girl if her container of garlic bread crumbs is any good. We get to talking about and she makes a comment about olives. Then you say “Last night I used some spanish olives in this dish I made and it was very tasty.” What will her instinct be? If she’s a normal person who’s open, it will be to know what dish you cooked.

If you said this instead: “Last night I cooked an awesome meatloaf meal with homemade tomato sauce from a recipe my mom gave me and it was so delicious.” She’ll probably nod or just say, “Cool.” In this case with the olives, you give her an opportunity to easily invest in the conversation, but with the meatloaf line you make it much more difficult for her to give a meaningful response.

If there’s a statement you want to make that contains information, like a meal you cooked, how much can you remove from that statement to make her complete the picture by asking a question?

Let’s say you're meeting a friend for lunch, but arrive twenty minutes late. I sit down at his table and say, “Sorry I’m late. There was a serious incident on the subway.” What’s his instinct going to be? Without even thinking, my friend is going to ask, “What happened?”

Now if you just told your friend the whole story he can’t do much more than nod. Giving too much detail to someone who hasn’t shown any interest in the topic, is an unnatural way to have a conversation.  Even if you want to tell your friend about the subway incident, if he doesn’t show any interest withhold further detail about it.

There are three different responses a girl can give to your bait: no bite, a nibble, and a full bite. If she doesn’t even acknowledge what you just said, you can’t elaborate on it. For example, if she doesn’t ask you what the “tasty” meal you cooked was, you can’t tell her. She must show an investment in the topics you bring up before you can go deeper. Otherwise, you must continue to skim the surface until you land on something she wants to talk about.

A nibble is when she responds with a statement that shows lukewarm interest in the topic. Instead of asking what meal you cooked, she might say, “I don’t time to cook at home. I’m just to busy with school.”  She’s responding with small bait of her own, giving you a way to proceed. You can then talk about how long it takes to make a good home-cooked meal, an article you read about how Americans are eating out come (contributing to the obesity epidemic), or what type of activities she does that keep her so busy. A nibble is still a great outcome since she’s giving you substance to continue the conversation.

With a full bite, she’d ask what the meal was or say, “Oh really?” You can then talk about the meal. Again, unless you get a full bite, you can’t elaborate on what the meal was. Full bites aren’t going to be to common in the first few minute of a conversation, so early on you should be content with nibbles.

In some cases, it will be hard to tell if she just offered a nibble or a full bite. A good rule of thumb is this: did she give signs that she wanted to learn more? This could come with nonverbal cues, like a laugh, a big smile, or even a confused look. If you think she made a firm bite, but going deeper into the topic causes her to clam up, that means you misinterpreted the signal. Log her reaction in your memory bank to aid in future approaches.

Bait allows you to show value and have a lively conversation that makes a girl comfortable with you.

Rambling while tossing out bait is a means for drawing a girl out of her cat shell and allowing her to become engaged in the conversation. It encourages her to share information, her opinions, and ask questions, which you can then use to further personalize the interaction. This means that no matter how awesome your bait is, you still need to pause even couple of sentences to allow her to respond. You then use her responses to make the conversation more natural and enjoyable.

Don’t worry about focusing on memorizing game material to much it’s less important that understanding the principles of having a good conversation. You have to pause and toss out good bait and know when she’s nibbling or biting, then you’ll do far better than if you were to memorize every example in the book.

The more real you come across the better. Don’t appear rough on purpose. It’s more than acceptable to think while you talk. Instead of memorizing specific routines, memorize the ramble mindset: “As long as she’s looking at me, I must keep talking, and I don’t care if I say something stupid. I won’t stop talking until she walks or looks away.”

Throughout our initial ramble, we’re waiting for a response that allows us to take the conversation somewhere else. For example, say I ask a girl where I can find a pet shop that sells cats, and she says, “Why do you want to buy a cat? Dogs are better.” I can then easily go on about the merits of dogs while asking why she doesn’t like cats. But if she keeps saying something like, “Sorry I don’t know where is is” or “I’m not sure,” I need to continue to ramble about pet shops until she gives me an answer with more meat.

Chicken-and-egg issue: Does happiness cause smiling or does smiling cause happiness? Triggering muscles responsible for smiling makes your brain think your happy, which causes happiness. The effect is small but measurable.

Roosh’s chicken-and-egg question Game Hypothesis: A girl asking questions will see her interest in you increase. We normally think along the lines of “If a girl is asking me questions, that means she’s into me,” but we can hijack the process by structuring our conversation in a way that almost forces her to ask a lot of questions. Thanks to our baiting, the questions will come first and her brain won’t be able to help but make the assumption that she’s interested in the person she’s talking to.

Your goal during the day will be to get her as engaged in the conversation as possible, and the best way to do that is for her to ask questions through the use of strong small bait, even if her question is as simple as, “Why do you want to buy a cat?” It’s fine if she’s engaged merely by nibbling on your bait, but the more she bites by hitting you with questions, no matter how meaningless you make think those questions are, the faster her interest will develop. If you can get her asking question when you’re talking about things like books, pets, or food, the chances of her biting on your bigger bait will go up dramatically.

3.3 Bigger Bait

Ramble filled with small bait makes the conversation more lively, investing her in the encounter. It also encourages her to ask basic questions, which gets her even more interested. Big bait is the final piece of the puzzle, because it causes her to ask a personal question, during which she seeks information about who you are. This is pure interest.

You even played a little dumb, asking if her laptop had “the Internet access” and USB ports, questions I’ve actually asked before. She was overly helpful in describing its features and capabilities, and by the three-minute mark there was nothing more you could discuss about laptops. Since you know you’ve stayed on the opening topic for a sufficient amount of time, you decide to hit her with a bigger piece of bait. You say, “My laptop isn’t bad. I’m just hoping it lasts because I’ve been working eight months on this project and it’s almost done.” Hopefully, she won’t be able to stop herself from responding, “What kind of project?” (You could have made it even juicier by lengthening eight months to something like three years.)

Let’s say you opened a girl in a bookstore café about the quality of her laptop, to the point where you were pretty much qualified to be a salesman of her particular model.
If she bites, you can elaborate on the project while still speaking in bait form, where you withhold some information to encourage her to dig into the specifics of what you’re doing. When that topic dies down, you can inquire about the work she’s doing on her laptop. This is how deep conversations occur from laughably innocuous openers. Even if she doesn’t give a full bite to your “eight months” bait, a nibble of “Oh, cool. I’m doing a school assignment myself” would still open the door to talking about her assignment.

It’s unlikely that I had really worked on the project for eight months. I lied. I also don’t care if her laptop is good, what kind of bag she’s traveling with, or if her pen puts out a smooth trail of thick black ink. Those were lies, too. Proper day game involves telling little white lies, including anecdotes that may have happened to a friend instead of to you. Yes, you’re going to be telling lies. Get over that right now, because remember that approaching strangers during the day isn’t natural. Pure, priestly honesty might get you two numbers a year—if that—since there’s rarely a “real” reason to talk to a girl during the day. Telling little lies while seeking information we don’t really need is necessary to start a conversation in a way that keeps a girl relaxed.

I don’t want to go overboard in rationalizing white lies, but I will say that we’re not lying about who we really are. Our lies are so small that there’s no need to cover our tracks, construct alibis, or enlist the help of co-conspirators. As long as you don’t overdo it and limit yourself to only a couple white lies per approach, you’ll find that it’s a necessary evil for making girls feel comfortable.

The “I’ve been working on this project for eight months” comment is big bait, meaning it’s related to who you are as a human being. It begins to define your true essence. The two big pieces of bait I use often start with “When I lived in South America…” or “After I quit my corporate job…” I then continue with some sort of comparison or opinion that relates to what we’re talking about. For example: “After I quit my corporate job, I started coming to coffee shops like this to work on my project,” or “After I quit my corporate job, I started riding the subway more often since I have to come to the city.”

The only thing is that I can’t dive into these things unless she at least nibbles on the bait drop.

Let’s say I’m in a clothing shop. A few minutes into an approach I say, “When I lived in South America, it was impossible to find this type of shirt. The style there was graphic tees instead of plaid.” For me to elaborate about my South American experience, she has to show interest in the form of asking a follow-up question or saying something like, “Really?” In effect, I’m telling her, “I’m putting this topic right here. If you don’t want to talk about it, that’s fine. I’ll simply take it away and talk about something else you may be more interested in.”

What I’d never do is this: “When I lived in South America, from the period of April 2009 to May 2010, where I spent six months in Colombia, six months in Brazil, and one month in Argentina, mostly in hostels, cheap hotels, and private apartments, I didn’t encounter this type of shirt. The style there was graphic tees instead of plaid.” That’s annoying and makes her wonder why the hell I’m going on and on about something that she didn’t show any interest in. Don’t elaborate until she gives you the green light to continue. Until then, you’re simply making a short statement that offers her a glimpse of something interesting you’ve done.

Big bait allows you to introduce your best qualities and strengths without bragging. You’re squeezing it out gently, like using a tube of toothpaste. Most other guys, though, stomp on the tube so that toothpaste matter splatters all over the place. If she digs my South America bait, we’ll probably be able to talk about travel for quite some time, which will give me opportunities to drop other things I’ve done while traveling through the continent. Within ten minutes she’s going to know the coolest parts about me, and if she’s a single girl who doesn’t find my appearance objectionable, the decision to give me her number will be an easy one

3.4 Making Your Own Custom Big Bait
It helps to have a slogan which defines you, almost as if you were a commercial item. If she’s open and doesn’t mind your vibe, things will definitely proceed when you drop big bait for her to bite on. Who are you as a man? What defines you? Are you a “professional who loves the outdoors?” Are you an artist with a passion for Eastern European culture”? Whatever it is,  you’re going to have to start broadcasting it via bait no later than the fifth minute of conversation. While it’s not necessary to have a slogan, it does help you realize what qualities you should communicate first—the things that are most congruent with your personality and lifestyle.

If you you work a boring job and play video games, it’ll take more time and more approaches to attract women. It’s no surprise that having an interesting life makes it easier for women to want to go out with you, and for some men, game is more about becoming an interesting person that they think of as “game.”

Seek out younger, more inexperienced girls who have yet to meet a lot of guys with vast life experience if you have not a lot of things to talk about.

Understand that your value is perceived in a relative way. In “flyover” country simply coming across as normal and hygienic will be enough to attract girls. In NYC or LA, however, where there are lots of men doing interesting things, the bar will be higher.

When a girl asks you a personal question the odds that you get her number increases to 75%.

Think of ways the phrase your unique experiences in the most interesting way so that a girl can’t resist  asking something about you. The whole point of day approached is to have girls ask a personal question. Any other signals about her interest can be ignored, but when the personal question comes, you’ve done enough to go for the number.

You job is to identify not only best bait you should deliver, but how to deliver it.

Let’s start with the easiest form of big bait: travel. That’s when you mention different places you’ve traveled to or lived in, including cities in your own country.

Pretend you’ve been to Sweden, Thailand, Russia, and San Francisco. Because we want to make the bait juicy, it helps to withhold the name of the countries to increase the intrigue factor. Therefore you’d say Scandinavia, Southeast Asia, the Soviet Union, or the West Coast. Since you’re hijacking her question-asking apparatus, you want her to inquire about the specific names of the countries in addition to other travel details. Remember: the more questions she asks, the better.

I had a student who had lived a rural life. He had never ventured from a small Virginia town to a foreign country or even to New York City, which is just five hours away by bus. Washington DC is the only other city he set foot in. Therefore his big bait would be “Where I come from...” When you’re out of your home city, your first big bait drop will be those four words. This is pretty damn juicy, especially if you’ve dropped some enticing hints about where that location is.
When I’m in South America, saying “Where I come from…” invites far more engagement than “Back in America…” Sometimes I have to repeat it two or three times until she finally bites, but only then can I give more detail about my homeland. (Two examples would be: “Where I come from, the coffee shops close much later” or “Where I come from, the travel section in bookstores takes up an entire row.”)

Girls won’t automatically bite hard on your travel bait. For example, if you say, “When I was in Scandinavia, the coffee was more bitter. I think the coffee here is smoother,” she may not directly ask, “Where in Scandinavia?” But she may nibble instead, making statements about coffee or saying, “I’ve never been to Scandinavia,” which is a faint request for a little more information about your experience.

While a bite is the best response, nibbles are just fine in helping us out. It’s when she responds with short phrases like “Oh,” “I see,” and “Yeah” that you should take a step back and continue talking about the previous topic (in this case, coffee).

If she doesn’t ask you a personal question on your big piece of bait you’ll drop another big piece of bait in a minute or two since she has to ask a personal question for you to get her number.

Since a girl will rarely bite hard on your first big piece of bait, it’s important to keep at least six solid pieces in your pipeline. The fewer pieces of bait you have, the more you risk “wasting” your good stuff before you’re absolutely sure she’s open and engaged with your elderly chat.

One good thing is that you always have the option of repeating bait, something I don’t hesitate to do with “Where I come from” while I’m traveling. She’s going to bite whether she likes it or not, especially if she’s maintaining eye contact and not turning away. It’s only after you’ve been talking forever (at least fifteen minutes) and she doesn’t bite on any big bait that you can safely assume she’s not interested. I find that girls in serious relationships will have a long conversation with a strange man, but not ask him any personal questions because asking is considered closer to cheating than merely having the conversation. A

At this point we have small bait, which are everyday opinions and comments that aren’t personal, and big bait, which is based on travel, hobbies, and lifestyle. To better understand the latter two categories of big bait, it’s best to give you some examples. (More examples of small bait will be given in the venue chapters.)

Let’s say you’re in a creative field and one day you’re enjoying a cappuccino in a coffee shop. If you’re a musician, your big bait would be something like, “I’m drinking a quadruple shot espresso because of a tough performance I had last night. I didn’t get much sleep.” If you’re an artist: “I was staring at that piece of art on the wall because I like how the painter used broad strokes in the landscape. I’m familiar with that technique.” You’d point out anything artistic in the vicinity and drop a comment that makes you come across as knowledgeable in that area. If you’re a writer, glance at your screen and say, “I’ve been here all day because of this project I’ve been working on. This is actually my favorite chair because my productivity is highest.”

Venturing out of the art world, imagine you dabble in rock climbing. Still in the coffee shop, your big bait would be: “I’m trying to relax now with this apple cider to save up energy for an excursion I’m taking with my group.” If you’re a chess player or some other sort of competitor: “I’m trying to do some light reading for a tournament tomorrow, but I’m finding it hard to concentrate. My mind keeps wandering.” If you’re a scientist: “I’m just reviewing some papers for an experiment coming up. I figured this coffee shop would be a nice place to get some work done.” If you’re a bartender: “I had a late night at work dealing with crazy drunks, so it’s nice to be in a quiet, sober place.”

Note how you don’t come out and say you’re a rock climber or bartender or what have you. Instead, you hit her with an intriguing statement that begins to reveal a positive quality that makes up a good chunk of who you are.

It’s been previously stated that it’s best to wait a few minutes before even thinking about dropping big bait. Another yardstick is if she has asked you a couple of small questions during elderly chat, because it’s unlikely that a girl will bite on your big bait if she’s being barely responsive before you drop it. Her participation during the initial “boring” part of the conversation is a good clue on whether she’ll bite on your big bait. If she’s maintaining eye contact, not turning away, and engaged in the conversation, drop a first big bait about travel around the two or three-minute mark. If you didn’t get a full bite, drop a different piece two minutes later.

Unless you’re a bartender, actor, DJ, model, professional photographer, television producer, or CIA agent, the girl won’t care a whole lot about your job. Dropping your job is a borderline attraction destroyer, though it’s okay to experiment with job bait while you develop your pipeline.

One exception is if you’re passionate about your job. If you can discuss it in an energetic way that leads to other topics, by all means use it as one of your early pieces of bait. Unfortunately, the typical middle class career that 95% of men have isn’t interesting, so you’ll have to try to snag her with better topics than your job.

I want to make a quick side note that humor alone is a very reliable way to build attraction during the day, but it can be overdone to the point where you appear like a clown. While your only intention shouldn’t be to appear funny, it does help to toss in some casual or witty dry humor. I’ve had many approaches where I didn’t drop a single piece of big bait but the girl started asking me personal questions, all because she was nearly keeling over in laughter.

A problem with using a humor strategy to build attraction instead of interestingness is that most girls have mediocre senses of humor, especially when they’re from a different culture than your own. As effective as humor is, I can’t in good conscience send you out there with it as one of your main attraction-building strategies. It’s just not as universal and effective as displaying personal value.

Big baits that are juicy will be more related to your hobbies and lifestyle than your job. Some actual examples used from other people. “When I was bushcrafting the other week...” Bushcrafting is camping with very limited supplies. For this bait, I told my student to follow with a statement showing how he had “missed” something, like good coffee, a regular shirt, books, or whatever subject is currently being discussed. First example: “Even though I’m not a huge fan of Starbucks coffee, I really missed it when I was bushcrafting the other week.” Second example: “I was bushcrafting all week, so I’m just getting used to riding the train again. The fast movement is making me a little dizzy.”

“In my last competition, I met a guy who…” Here you drop one of your athletic or competitive hobbies by mentioning how a “guy” made a comment related to the current topic. First example: “At my race last week, I saw a guy wearing this style of shirt and he told me to stop by this store.” Second example: “At my competition yesterday, my opponent told me this bookstore had the best selection.” The imaginary guy serves as a device to bring up your contest, race, meet, or event. You can also omit him completely: “I like to calm myself before I compete, so I usually come to this coffee shop to get one of their herbal teas. It’s very soothing.”

“During my lesson the other day, my instructor said…” This is useful if you’re learning a language or musical instrument. You’ll then attribute a comment to your instructor that relates to the current topic. First example: “During my language lesson last week, my instructor recommended I try feta cheese. He said it has sharp bite.” Second example: “I used to always take the 46 bus, but my music teacher said the 42 bus is much faster.”

“When I was couchsurfing…” Couchsurfing is based on the website of the same name, where you crash on couches for free. Most girls don’t know what this is, increasing the chance that they’ll inquire about it, which opens the door for a travel discussion. First example: “I’m trying to find a shirt that I can wear night or day. I’m going to do a bit of couchsurfing soon and I want to pack light.” Second example: “Is that a good food for adding to a lot of dishes? I cook for my hosts when I couchsurf, so it’s nice to have an ingredient that can go with different things.”

“In my old gig, I had a student/friend who…” The point here isn’t to show value in what your old gig was, but for her to ask what you’re currently doing. This isn’t a powerful piece of bait since you’ll be talking about work, but it deserves a place in your pipeline. First example: “In my old gig, I always had to go in on the weekends. Now I can spend them in coffee shops like this one.” Second example: “In my old gig, I couldn’t wear shirts like this, but now I don’t have to worry about dressing up in something like a uniform.”

I’ve taught several guys who were into martial arts. I told them to roll their shoulder a few minutes into the conversation (as if they’re trying to stretch it out or alleviate an ache) until the girl notices with her eyes. Then I told them to say, “Yeah, I’m just a little sore from my fight the other day. I’m hoping it will get better in a couple days.” At night, these guys can say, “I’m not drinking too much tonight, I have to prepare for an upcoming fight.” It’s okay to exaggerate about live fighting even if you don’t really do it.

“When I’m on the water…” This is for guys who fish or do water sports. One student liked to fish on the Chesapeake Bay, so his big bait was, “When I’m on the bay…” (By now you should see how ambiguous these big bait drops are.) First example: “When I’m on the water, I like to take snacks that are heavy on carbohydrates. That item looks like it would work.” Second example: “When I’m on the water, the wind is usually strong, so I need a lycra shirt that will keep me warm.”

“For my dances…” or “In my dancing battle…” This big bait is useful if you’re into specific dance styles like salsa or tango. The easiest time to bring it up is in a retail store. First example: “I’m looking for a nice but simple shirt for a dance I have coming up. I don’t want a shirt that’s too constricting.” Second example: “I think this would be a calming book to read. I’m looking for something to pass the time with in my dancing battles when I have to wait a while until my number comes up.”

“Whenever I’m on my board…” For use by surfers or other adventure sports that use boards. Example: “I get claustrophobic on trains like this. I like it when I’m on my board and there’s nothing but open space.”

“When I took a ride…” For use by motorcyclists. Example: “During my ride the other day, I got this weird headache and my doctor thinks it’s because I’m not getting enough iron. This food seems to be packed with it.”

“This new dish I’m working on…” For use by amateur cooks while shopping in a grocery store. Example: “I’m wondering if this spice will work on a new exotic dish I’m trying to develop.”

“This new story I’m working on…” For use by writers. Example: “It doesn’t matter how much caffeine I drink, but I’m having trouble getting past the climax on this story I’m working on.”

“When I play my sport…” For use by amateur athletes. Example: “I usually ride my bike, but I’m taking the subway so I can give my legs a rest after my tough game yesterday.”

“In my art project…” For use by budding artists. An “art project” can be anything remotely artistic, like a collection of travel photographs or short movie clips. Example: “I was thinking of buying this book about film to help with my art project. I’m confused about how lighting works in outdoor shoots and was hoping to learn more about it.”

“In my last production…” For use by producers or actors. Example: “In my last production, we did a scene that was about how bookstores are dying and how everyone is going to be using e-readers in the future.”

 “In my music group….” or “In my current musical gig…” For use by guys in a band. First example: “One of the members in my music group recommended this coffee shop. It’s pretty laid back.” Second example: “I’m trying to find a shirt to wear in my music gig tomorrow that says, ‘Cool, but not trying too hard.’”

“Out on the range…” For use by policemen or guys in the military. Example: “I was craving a cup of coffee when I was out on the range earlier, since they have a rule that says you can’t drink caffeine.”

These is not even scratching the surface of possible hobbies men participate in, but with these examples I hope to get your mind moving in the right direction. It should now be clear how to drop the cool things you’re doing in a casual way, even if the drops are slightly obvious or silly (if she’s open and engaged, odds are she’ll look forward to discussing it).

You’ll have to take a leap of faith and drop something that has absolutely nothing to do with the current conversation, but as long as you can link it back to the topic, the worst case is that she doesn’t ask about it and you continue on the trajectory you were on.

Get out a piece of paper and write down a list of your projects, hobbies, cities and countries visited, and unique experiences. Then construct a list of possible bait drops that you can test. A general guideline is to create bait that’s 70% interesting and 30% vague, a balance that’ll be clearer in the field when you see what’s getting bites and what’s not. The good news is that since you’ve been to at least one other city in your life, you already have one piece of bait in your pipeline. Most guys can come up with at least five after thinking about their lives for ten minutes, which is more than enough to get numbers during the day. To reach superstar status, where you’re able to connect with a wide variety of women, you’ll need at least ten diverse pieces of big bait (bonus points if you can drop them in a foreign language).

It’s unlikely that your big bait version 1.0 will be best, so you’ll have to experiment over time. For example, maybe saying “fight” leads to more bites instead of saying “match.” Maybe saying “dancing competition” leads to more bites than “dancing gig.” The only way to find out is to test.

Bait can also come in other forms, such as facts about yourself. Oftentimes I (author) use my age as bait when I’m talking to a younger girl, because I find that most enjoy the company of men around 30 years old. I’ll say something such as, “When you get to my advanced age, you become very choosy about the coffee shops you do your work at.” Or I’ll say, “Once you start getting gray hair like me, you can’t go to those places anymore.” If I’m dropping age bait at only three minutes into the conversation, I can almost guarantee she won’t bite on it since it would be showing too much interest on her part, but if she’s curious then she’ll likely bite on the next piece, assuming the chat continues. Sometimes a girl will ask how old I am several minutes after I initially dropped age bait, showing that some bait drops take time to marinade in her brain.

Notice how money isn’t mentioned in any bait examples. In Western culture, girls aren’t impressed by money since they make their own. If you go on about your successful job or imply that you make a lot of cash, there’s a risk you’ll be pegged as a douche bag. It’s just too transparent, and if that sort of game worked, guys would be walking around with t-shirts displaying their annual income. When it comes to day game, social skills and interestingness make up 75% of success, with logistics making up most of the remainder.

Unfortunately, game isn’t a miracle drug. It doesn’t create value where there is none—it merely brings out the value that you already have. You’ll still need to offer something.

While you don’t need to be well-traveled or have several cool hobbies, the more interesting you are, the easier it will be for you to get numbers and dates.

Becoming more interesting is a process. It starts with reading books or exposing yourself to interesting people in order to gather knowledge and ideas for activities to try. You then act on what you’ve learned by exploring something new, pushing yourself out of your comfort zone. Those new actions can then provide excellent fodder for good conversation.

Hobbies involving art, travel, cooking, sailing, hiking, surfing, snowboarding, and outdoor recreation have unique features that impress a layman. Some people seem awed when I say I’ve written a couple of books, but to me sitting in front of laptop for hours a day isn’t particularly exciting. I may get into a chat with a snowboarder, asking him all sorts of questions about how he got into the hobby, while he sees the sport as a vanilla activity like jogging.

Don’t underestimate yourself and think that because a hobby is no longer novel to you it won’t be fascinating to others. You must understand there’s no way a girl will find out about your cool features unless you drop them on her. She’s not going to ask you to drop bait—you have to do it on your own.

When it comes to interestingness, a good rule of thumb is this: are you more interesting than the girl? Most girls spend the bulk of their free time on their cell phones sending text messages, watching reality television, or reading Cosmo. If you can’t beat that, you’re in trouble. On the other hand, if you meet a stylish girl in a clothing store who’s actually a party promoter while also performing in an electro-rock band, you better bring the value. The cooler (and hotter) the girl, the more value you need to bring. Reading a couple cool books may be enough to get the number of the Cosmo girl, but it won’t be enough for the stylish girl, because when you run out of all your bait only five minutes in, she’s not going to feel crazy about getting to know you.

Being interesting is part of your path to self-discovery. There’s no clear recipe to follow, but it does involve going above and beyond your daily routine. It involves taking risks, breaking out of your comfort zone, and being creative. If you’re just doing the bare minimum in life, wasting several hours a day on the Internet, you’re going to have problems connecting with high-quality women. Game is a great way to help show your value to women, but no game in the world will hide a boring life or help a “loser” land a girl who already has a dozen guys in hot pursuit.

3.5 Waiting For The Bite

The overall point in our approach is to get her intrigues enough to ask just one personal question about you.
 She can ask one of the big personal questions such as…
“How old are you?”
“Where are you from?”
“What’s your name?”
“What do you do?”
Or she can ask a question related to one of your big bait drops. While having a girl ask, “Do you like your coffee?” or “What is your favorite breed of cat?” is a good indicator of interest, we need to keep going until she can’t help but ask a big personal question about who we are or what we’ve done. Only then can we go for the digits.

We need a girl to make at least the minimum investment of wanting to get to know us before we can even think about arranging a future meeting. The personal question requirement is a non-negotiable part of my system.

If you run night game, you probably have girls ask, “What do you do?” all the time. It definitely isn’t any sign that she really likes you or wants to talk to you again in the future, but during the day it’s huge. If a girl asks that question, you’re definitely getting her number.

You’ll have to wait patiently like a fisherman for a bite before you can start reeling in the line (by running Galnuc, which will be described in the next chapter).

At night you respond to “What do you do?” by being humorous, inventing something like “organic farmer” or “seal hunter,” but during the day I recommend you respond with a serious answer. After she acknowledges your job title, offer a brief description that highlights something interesting about your duties or why you chose the career in the first place.

Let’s pretend you’re a middle manager at a boring accounting firm and a girl asks what you do. “I’m an accountant,” you say. “That’s nice,” she replies. “Yeah, I deal with numbers and Excel spreadsheets all day. It’s not too exciting to a normal person such as yourself, but when you’ve been obsessed with numbers since childhood, it becomes a logical career move. I enjoy the work.”

If she doesn’t respond with anything, simply ask what she does. The main idea isn’t just to offer your job title and then go silent, but to respond with a humorous or interesting explanation that makes it easier for her to respond back. Even if you hate your job, talk about the positives.

When a girl asks about your job or any other personal information, you’ll get her number. There is one exception: when you’re traveling. If you’re abroad and played up your out-of-town status with the “Where I’m from…” bait, you’ll need a girl to ask two personal questions before running Galnuc. Being a foreigner is such gigantic bait that even girls who don’t like you won’t be able to resist asking where you’re from. Think of that as a gimme. Don’t skip the rambling process if a foreign chick asks your background a minute or two into a conversation. For them you need to get asked that second personal question.

In many cases you’ll be dropping big bait all day and she just won’t bite. You think you’re wasting your time, but then out of the blue she’ll say, “I’m sorry, but I never got your name.” When that happens, reel it in. Until that glorious moment when a girl asks a personal question, I imagine that my feet are encased in cement and I can’t move until she leaves first.

Even if you think a girl is disinterested COMMIT TO THE APPROACH. Many people walk away even when a phone number is near.

To prevent you from making the same mistake, commit to every approach. You’re in it until you get a clear rejection that she no longer wants to talk to you.

An approach isn’t over until you get a number, she turns away, or she completely stops talking. That’s when the cement loosens and you can move. I want you to feel the rejection, because only by getting that will you learn the persistence it takes to get numbers during the day.

3.6 The Art Of Rambling

If a girl responds with a question, repeat the process of giving a bait-rich answer. If she only answers with a statement, that’s fine—she’s still nibbling and wants you to continue. But if a girl only nods or says “Okay” after I say all that, trouble is brewing and she’ll probably be averting eye contact soon. Until then, though, I keep talking.

Some girls need a while to warm up to a man. I (author) remember listening (via wireless radio) to the approach of a student in a grocery store. For the first three minutes, the girl never spoke in sentences of more than three words. It was a never-ending chorus of “Okay,” “Yeah,” and “Cool.” My student kept going because she maintained firm eye contact, and like a butterfly emerging from a cocoon, she eventually started responding with longer sentences. Then at the five-minute mark, she asked him a personal question. Though the conversation had started out as a dud from an outsider’s perspective, that particular cat simply needed some time to warm up to the human being who wanted to pet her.

The above example reinforces the idea of remaining encased in concrete until it’s obvious a girl isn’t interested. If you don’t feel at least some discomfort, you bailed out too early. Only two outcomes are acceptable: a clear rejection or at least a phone number. The emotion you’ll make her feel is either annoyance or happiness.

Understand: the richer the statements you give, the richer the responses you can potentially receive, which will inevitably lead to her asking a personal question. Practice being long-winded, even if it’s not your natural style, by pretending you’re an elderly old man who keeps on talking and talking. That’s what is required if you want to pick up girls during the day.

Make it painfully easy for the girl to respond. Almost as if you’re spoon-feeding her responses that will deepen the conversation. Make stuff happen instead of being passive and hoping the girl is a bubbly conversationalist.

A good thing to think about is all the simple questions people ask you every day, such as “How was your weekend?” or “What are you up to?” and the quick answers you give in response. How could you respond at greater length, squeezing in tidbits they’d find interesting enough to follow up with more questions?

While it’s okay to ask questions to keep the conversation going, try to not. If you are to ask any questions, make them related to your opening topic and come only after a sizable chunk of rambling. Hitting a girl with a machine-gun barrage of questions, especially personal ones, makes the conversation nothing more than an interview, something that annoys the hell out of women.

A common bad habit guys have is to resort to personal questions before they’ve attempted to ramble.

Keep your chat elderly in nature by making non-personal, inoffensive statements. until she warms up and hit you with maybe two complete sentences in a row, a seemingly minor feat that’s actually a great sign of progress.

One thing that helps your ramble is being aware of your surroundings. What is she doing? What prop is she working with? Why is she sharing your space at this moment in time? What is the overall context? Unless the two of you are in an isolation chamber, there will be countless things you can talk about in your shared environment for the time it takes until you can start dropping big bait.

While struggling to maintain elderly chat can be a sign that your social skills need work, another possibility is that you’re not observant enough. Wherever you are, stop and look around. What’s going on that you can comment about? Environmental awareness makes rambling simply an extension of your thoughts.

It’s important to realize that rambling is necessary for two people to start developing a connection. This means that you need to enjoy the entire process of elderly chatting and big bait dropping. You must enjoy going on and on about topics that may not be the most interesting in the world to you, because if you’re enjoying it, then chances are she will be, too. If you’re just punching the clock, giving a half-hearted effort to ramble only so you can get to the personal chatting, you’ll be disappointed at how often the cat refuses to bite, all because you’re scaring her off.

You also need to remember to take your time. Every conversation is unique and it must be nourished along, slowly and gently. Commit to your approaches, commit to rambling, and commit to building a real rapport through rich conversation and big bait drops.

It’s crucial to master your rambling skill because time is highly correlated to success. Even if a girl isn’t entirely sure how she feels about you, she’ll probably give you her number if you’ve been talking for at least ten minutes. In the beginning of the approach, you’ll be doing about 80% of the talking, which gives you ample opportunity to demonstrate your value, but as time goes on it should decrease to about 60%. In some cases, you’ll be lucky and have a chatterbox on your hands who does most of the work for you. If there’s only one skill set you need to be good at during the day, it’s chattiness—of running your mouth even when a girl doesn’t explicitly say she wants you to continue. Because she never will.

CLOSING

4.1 Galnuc

4.2 The Venue Change

4.3 Same-Day Dates

COFFEE SHOP
The second technique you want to use is to always precede your opener with, “Excuse me.” It lets the cat know you’re not going to offend or humiliate her. Most importantly, it gets her attention. Otherwise she may think you’re talking on your phone with a bluetooth. A case where it’s optional is when you’re sharing the same table in a coffee shop, since whatever you say will automatically get her attention.

PUTTING IT ALL TOGETHER

You now posses enough knowledge to successfully pick women up during the day. With a firm grasp of this material, it probably won’t take you more than fifteen approaches to get your first number. The final step is to connect all the dots to make sure you understanding of the day game model is rock-solid.

Scripted Openers vs. Spontaneous Openers

Some guys are hesitant to use scripted openers, and want to come up with an awesome spontaneous opener that’s unique to each situation. Understand that all the scripted openers in this book are maximized for their naturalness. They’re cat-friendly lines that have been used hundreds of times.

Trust the lines. They work and will continue to work until human beings use virtual reality machines to communicate with each other. Until you’ve tried a line at least a dozen times, withhold judgment and have faith in what I’m (author) teaching you.

While I’m (author) sure you’re an intelligent, creative man, there’s little room to optimize the openers and immediate follow-ups I’ve given you. The improvement will come with your ramble, which should flow naturally from your unique personality and experiences. Unless you figure out an opener that’s even more elderly than the ones I’ve shared, stick with mine.

There are two types of instances when I use a spontaneous opener. The first is when I’m in a situation I’ve never encountered before. I’ll at least try to bring in elements of another opener so I don’t have to start entirely from scratch, but that may not always be an option. The second case is when I’m trying to freshen my game. If you’ve said a line a hundred times, your mind no longer gets excited about using it.