Stupid Mare

>Hear noises under front stairs.
>Get flashlight, big stick.
>Expect raccoon or dog.
>Stray fluffy pony.
>Seems frightened, won't talk or come out.
>See why.
>Mare with two newborn foals.
>Successful fluffy pony birth in the wild is super-rare.
>They'll never survive outside.
>Adopt fluffy pony family.
>Mare is okay, most of the time.
>Sometimes snaps, growls at you.
>Quick thwack to the nose fixes that.
>Fluffy foals are terrific.
>Playful, communicative, both love people.
>Mare never really accepts being tame.
>Gets worse with time.
>Tolerates you but not strangers.
>Has to be locked in safe room when you have visitors.
>Foals are great with strangers, energetically playing with your friends.
>Embarrassing, because mother howls and cries, banging her feeble hooves on safe-room door the entire time.
>Can't come outside to play either.
>Attacked mailman once.
>Fluffy pony attacks are harmless, but they could make a human trip & fall.
>Don't want to get sued.
One day...
>Fluffy mare is being particularly obnoxious.
"Okay...you're going in the sorry-box to cool off."
>"No!" snaps fluffy mare.
>Runs from you.
>thiscannotbetolerated.gif
>Give chase.
>Fluffy mare makes a break for outside.
>Crashes face first into screen door.
>Bounces back, dazed, but screen is torn.
>Gets to her feet, scrambles out hole, ripping tear wider.
>You could stop her, but you don't.
>Seconds later, tires squeal.
>Fluffy mare is now splattered on the pavement.
>Two foals watched the whole thing from safe-room window.
>Foals cry horribly.
>"Mummy! Why mummy died!?"
>Hold them to your chest, comfort them as best you can.
>Happy their stupid mother is dead.
>Best Day Ever.
>Fluffy foals stop sobbing, begin sucking on your man nipples.
>You're their mummy now.
>Totally worth a torn screen door.