Powder (1995)

>be me, bonky
>i'm hanging out with my albino friend, powder
>powder won't go back to the bus to drive me home
>he wants to sit in a field of daffodils and commune with nature or something
>he's sitting and sitting and sitting
>and i've raged to get him to drive me home
>but he's just sitting there getting hit by lightning
>i think he likes getting hit by the lightning
>it just really feels like he's choosing lightning strikes over me
>i tell him to cool it with the getting hit by lightning
>i tell him he's overdoing it
>but he's not listening
>he just keeps getting struck
>and at first i was like okay that's neat
>that's a neat trick
>but after like the sixteenth lightning strike
>his muscles started blowing open in big gibs
>and i think his thigh bone cracked in half
>i'm pretty sure i heard that
>i shout out "i think you have a problem!"
>powder's head whips around
>he screams "WHAT THE FUCK DID YOU JUST SAY ABOUT ME?"
>his gums are cherry red
>i squeal
>i bolt
>i look back
>powder is being carried up by a lightning storm
>he's screaming with rage
>"I'LL NEVER STOP!"
>the lightning carries him up over the forest
>he's coming after me
>his blood is showering down
>YOU FUCKED WITH THE WRONG ALBINO, MF-ER!
>i run to the safety of the bus
>but the bus won't start
>it's just an ordinary bus
>made of metal
>and powder is drawing it in with his magnetic powers
>the bulkheads pop open and luggage comes pouring out and tumbling down the aisles
>the whole of the bus is lifted up into the air
>powder, nooooooooo! i shout
>but my pleas are drowned out