Luna's Stallion (RGRE)

>You are Celestia and your sister has just ended another potential match-up in failure.
>The two of you are sitting in the gardens enjoying a spot of tea. Luna is regaling you with the tales of her latest dating flop.
"How many does that make now Luna? How many more stallions are you going to chase away before you're satisfied?"
>"Thou can not blame us sister, these stallions you send to me as companions prance about like a small filly at a tea party."
"You mean as we do now?"
>"We do not mean it as such and you know this."
"Sister please... try to be more understanding of today's traditions. Things are not as they were then."
>Luna's ears flatten against her head and she looks at the ground.
>"We are aware of this sister. It has been a long time sine we were... away."
>You quickly try to find a way to change the subject away from your sister's banishment.
"I know! Sister, why don't you tell me once again why this date failed. You seemed to find it most amusing."
>Luna's ears perk up slightly and she snorts in a most un-princessly manner.
>"We decided it would be fun to go see that circus over in Ponyville. Does thou remember, the one with the Timberwolf?"
"Dreadful little creatures I believe, and very hostile towards ponies too."
>Thou are correct. Anyway, we wanted to go see that show first since it reminded us of our days playing in the Everfree forest."
"You were always so mischievous back then. You used to love tying branches to yourself and jumping out of bushes at me."
>"And you used to scream so loud I thought you were going to scare the birds right out of the trees."
>You chuckle and take a playful swipe at Luna's shoulder.
"As much as I enjoy reminiscing, please continue with the tale of your last date."
>Luna sighs and shakes her head.
>"We went to the Timberwolf cage first and the stallion was boasting how he could handle a Timberwolf with one hoof tied behind his back."
"You didn't. Please tell me you didn't."
>"What? We were somewhat impressed by his claims of strength and wanted to see him best the beast in our honor."
>You rub your hooves on your temples.
"You let the Timberwolf out of the cage and set it free in Ponyville?"
>"Oh heavens no sister."
>You let out a sigh of relief. Surely your sister couldn't be that out of touch.
>"We placed him in the cage with the Timberwolf. It could have been dangerous if the beast escaped.
>Okay maybe she was.
"No harm came to this pony I hope? Do you know the amount of protesting I am going to have to endure if he was injured?"
>"The creature never got near him dearest sister. Shortly after we teleported him into the cage he became hysterical and acted in a manner most unbecoming of our company."
"What did you do then?"
>"We were very upset that he lied to us about his prowess so we sent him to the moon and returned home."
>You facehoof and go back to rubbing your temples.
"I hope you understand how much complaining I will hear when I send him back home. You can't keep poofing your bad dates onto the moon."
"We are sorry sister, we know that is not how we should carry ourselves as members of royalty."
"Come now Luna, it's not all that bad. Yes I know these outings have been one failure after another but you're getting out of the castle and mingling with the townsfolk."
>"Yes, we suppose it isn't all THAT bad. We do enjoy our time walking under the night sky."
"See? I knew you would eventually start enjoying yourself."
>"....You have more dates lined up, don't you sister?"
>You suddenly find yourself very interested in the details of your teapot.
>Luna stares at you without blinking and you feel your face start to heat up under her unwavering gaze.
"I might."
>"How many sister?"
"A few."
>"How. Many. More. Sister?"
"Eight."
>Luna slams her head into the table and buries it under her hooves.
>"Please dearest sister, just have mercy and send us back to the moon."

>You are Luna and you are bored out of your mind.
>Your sister in all of her infinite wisdom has set you up on a date with another stallion.
>This one has a heavy interest in tea and teapots.
>Oh joy.