Russified Michigan Dream

i just had a very interesting dream
Basically I ordered Thai food from my usual place, but there was an order mixup and instead of what I ordered (cashew chicken) I got a single tiny piece of raw chicken in a box. I called the restaurant to ask wtf was up, only for them to apologize and hang up, so I decided to walk there myself and ask them, since it's close to my house. Once there, they told me they would refund me so I said fine and started walking home.
However, I soon realized that my city wasn't quite like I remember it being. The streets were arranged somewhat differently, and the architecture suddenly seemed European or Soviet in style. The more I looked around me, the more I realized that my city looks just like Moscow (I actually visited Moscow a few times as a kid irl). I soon came to learn that apparently my city essentially became Russified, and had come to be known as the "little Russia" of America. I even pulled up Google and typed in "why is <MY CITY>" and the first suggestion was "why is <MY CITY> russian now." Naturally this made me annoyed as fuck because I liked my city the way it was just fine lol. But yeah I kept walking along the streets and started noticing things like old people walking around in Eastern European style clothes, women walking around in Soviet-era evening dresses while Russian harmonica music could be heard playing in the distance. And yeah the architecture around me was completely Russian/Soviet style by that point. I kept walking and came across 3 people sitting on an outdoor table. One of them was a black guy, and we had a funny but slightly racist exchange 😭
>me: do you speak Russian?
>him: yes
>me: no ti zhe negr (not considered a slur in Russia)
>he got mad at this point
>me: hmm, is there a Russian version of the hard R and soft A then? like, can i say "Vots Ahp Mai Neega"
>him: fine, you can
>me: so are you Russian then?
>him: yes
>me: fully Russian?
>him: yes
>me: but aren't you Russian-American
>him: i'm Russian-American
Then he got up and lightly punched me, and I was like "ok I deserved that." He lightly punched me again and I said "ok I deserved that too lol.
Anyway I kept walking across town and came across some people who said they were calling the police, and I was like "don't you mean militsiya? <MY CITY> is basically Russia now so." I don't entirely remember what happened next, but somehow I got tf out of there because I wanted to move somewhere that wasn't so Russified. When I arrived, I saw an airport building across the street that was labeled in English, so I felt relieved until I heard a voice on the megaphone making an announcement, and it was a lady talking in Russian ): So I got tf out of there and arrived in another city, where I followed a guy down an underground passage. It was really dark and musty, because apparently the underground tunnels were under the "tallest building in the world," and there were rats, so I got scared and did a trick to wake myself up. Only I didn't actually wake up and found myself in yet another city, only this one was Germanified by German nationalists (idk if they were Nazis specifically). Anyway I barely explored this one and woke up after. I wonder if I would've gotten into more adventures there if I didn't wake up, oh well