Hobstweedl: so there’s this huge whale that lives in the atlantic ocean
Hobstweedl: simply massive, the biggest ever
Hobstweedl: he lives down in the bottom of the ocean with all the little fishes and starfishes, that feed off of the whale and clean his asshole from time to time
Hobstweedl: so one day while the whale was getting a rim job, a group of navy seals drops into the water and captures the whale
Hobstweedl: woah
Hobstweedl: easy now
Hobstweedl: and the whale’s name is vladmir
Hobstweedl: vladmir the inept
Hobstweedl: so he gets captured by the SEALS
Hobstweedl: and they transport him to Tampa by means of a hovercraft
Hobstweedl: because in the future, we all have hovercrafts
Hobstweedl: so when they get vladmir back to base, they spray paint him in camo colors, attach a freakin laser beam to his head, and stuff a small family of penguins in his ass, so they can live and like experiment and create biological weapons
Hobstweedl: in short, vladmir became a research submarine
Hobstweedl: except he was a whale
Hobstweedl: and penguins were probably nawing on dead ferrets in his rectum
Hobstweedl: while testing anthrax
Hobstweedl: ok so they want vladmir to be able to fly as well
Hobstweedl: so they take his fins, and put ruebar around it and frame it, put some foil on him
Hobstweedl: and then boom! he can fly
Hobstweedl: they just need to drop him off of a cliff
Hobstweedl: so with the flying vladmir, they load up with the penguins, that have created super anthrax that instantly kills, and fly over switzerland
Hobstweedl: drop the anthrax
Hobstweedl: and float towards france
keziarsenic: hay i’m swiss
Hobstweedl: ok
Hobstweedl: then
Hobstweedl: um
keziarsenic: france
keziarsenic: just france
Hobstweedl: ok
keziarsenic: and mexico
Hobstweedl: they toss anthrax and mexico
Hobstweedl: mexico gets it too
Hobstweedl: so after that
Hobstweedl: they proceed to divebomb vladmir right into the capitol in order to crush the moral of the people
Hobstweedl: so boom!
Hobstweedl: vladmir hits some paris building
Hobstweedl: and explodes
Hobstweedl: dies
Hobstweedl: but from him spawn 500 killer ninja penguins
Hobstweedl: that viciously slaughter the french population
Hobstweedl: and the whole reason the french didnt see it coming….
Hobstweedl: was because vladmir had the green and brown camo, and was completely invisible
Hobstweedl: the end