Dedede x Escargoon (Birthday Blowjob)

"Hmm... not bad."

Escargoon studied himself in the mirror. The frilly pink apron he had on was cute, he thought, but the snail wasn't sure if he liked the hat that went with it.

He took the hat off and scrutinized his reflection once more. Great. Now the outfit looks incomplete. Annoyed, Escargoon placed it back on his head, crossing his arms. "Maybe it'll grow on me," he sighed. Experimentally, he spun around in a little circle. "As long as Dedede likes it, I suppose." He wasn't sure how his employer-slash-boyfriend was going to handle this birthday surprise, but it was the best thing Escargoon could come up with.

"Maybe I'll look so ridiculous he'll get a laugh out of it," he mused aloud. "That's still somethin', right?"

He gave another twirl, but was not completely satisfied just yet. "Well, who knows... Maybe he'll see something I don't see..." He looked over at the door, and then at the clock hanging on the wall. I told him to come at around six o'clock, and it's almost time...

With a sigh, Escargoon turned back to his reflection. "It'll have to do. He'll be here in a few minutes and there isn't much I can do except roll with what I have..."

And if this doesn't satisfy him, I know exactly what will.

This particular thought brought a knowing smile to Escargoon's face as he re-positioned the pillows, making sure they looked just right. Dedede may not have been a perfectionist, but he was, and Escargoon wasn't going to let anything spoil their evening together.

He glanced around the room, pursing his lips. "Now, is the ambiance romantic or just tacky...?" Escargoon peered up at the clock once more and decided that it was too late to change anything now. He climbed onto Dedede's bed - although Escargoon slept in it so often now it might as well be their bed at this point - and attempted to arrange himself into a sultry position.

"This would be so much easier if I had a little sex appeal," he huffed, lying on his stomach and propping his face up with his elbows. At least Dedede found him attractive in general; that was the main thing.
He perked up at the sound of approaching footsteps, simultaneously trying to calm his nerves. The king had no idea what his partner had planned for him - other than the fact he was getting a present, of course, and in this castle a present could range from a piece of cheesecake to a nuclear reactor. (The former of which being far deadlier if Escargoon was the one who created it.)

The footsteps grew closer, and sounded heavier than normal footsteps - the confirmation that the footsteps belonged to the king himself.

The door knob turned, and Escargoon held his breath, preparing himself. I hope he enjoys this...

Said door promptly opened, King Dedede waking into the room.

"Happy birthday," a sultry voice greeted.

Dedede stopped in his tracks, frowning. "Escargoon?" He looked around in confusion. "Where are ya? Why are all the lights off?"

A sigh. "I'm over here."

"Over where?"

"Just follow the sound of my voice," came the exasperated reply. I knew I should've lit some candles...

"But why are the lights off?" Dedede demanded. "You playin' some kinda game with me, boy?"

"Once you come over here, you'll understand," Escargoon retorted. "And just because you pull pranks on my birthday doesn't mean I'd do the same to you."

Dedede gave an annoyed huff, approaching the bed and squinting. "I still don't - "

Fed up, Escargoon switched on the bedside lamp and promptly stared at him.

Dedede simply stared back, his eyes going up and down Escargoon's body, taking in the frilly outfit he was wearing. "What the... what are you - ?"

"This is your surprise," Escargoon said simply, crawling toward the king. His attitude transitioned from mildly irritated to coy within seconds. "Don't you like it?"

Dedede just stared at him, his eyes growing wide. He would never expected something like this from his partner; it was quite obvious what the snail was hinting at. "So... this is my surprise?"

"Why else would I put this outfit on for you?" Escargoon smiled. "It is your birthday, after all..."

Dedede continued to gaze at him, but now he began to look more curious - aroused, even - than puzzled. "So that means..."

"I made myself look nice for you," Escargoon replied, gesturing to the pink costume he had on. "And why do you think I'd do that?"

His tone was teasing, the question rhetorical, but Dedede still felt obligated to answer. "'Cause this isn't just a surprise. It's the present, ain't it?" He leaned closer, running his hand up Escargoon's side. The snail shivered. "What you up to, Escargoon?" Dedede smirked at him. "What you hidin' from me?"

Escargoon scooted away, much to the penguin's mild annoyance. "I'm not hiding anything," he answered in a faux innocent tone. "Besides, if you're so curious, then why not come a little closer?"

"Don't tempt me," Dedede warned in a teasing tone, but nonetheless he got onto the bed, crawling closer as Escargoon crawled back.

The snail came to a stop. He smirked as Dedede slowly headed toward him. "This will be a birthday you'll never forget."

"I'll hold ya to that, don't you worry," the penguin replied with a grin, grabbing a hold of the younger male and yanking him forward.

Escargoon let out a startled yelp as he was pulled against the king, but his smirk didn't waiver. "Looks like someone is a bit excited to get their other gift..."

"Maybe..." Dedede ran his tongue along Escargoon's neck, loving the little gasp this prompted from him. "But I wanna have a little fun with ya first."

Escargoon all but squirmed, wanting nothing more than to give into his body's urges. No, he reminded himself. Tonight it's all about him.

So instead he pulled away, amused at the annoyed look he received in response. "In time," Escargoon promised. "Just sit back and relax. I think you're gonna like what I have in store for ya." He hoped he wasn't blushing at the very thought. That would kind of ruin the sultry, come-hither image he was trying to create for himself.

Escargoon pulled Dedede's hat off, running his fingers through ruffled feathers before gently pressing his lips against his, straddling his lover as they toppled backwards onto the mattress. The snail pressed his hands against Dedede's wrists, pinning him to the bed.

"Just what are ya plannin'?" Dedede asked, partly with suspicion, partly with anticipation.

"Oh, you'll know once it happens..." Escargoon took control then, pressing his lips against his lover's neck, a satisfied moan escaping Dedede. His lips trailed down the penguin's neck and chest, continuing to leave a trail until he reached a certain area downstairs. Dedede shuddered, feeling a heat between his legs from Escargoon's lips.

"W-what - " he stuttered, but Escargoon rose his head and silenced him.

"Just try not to choke me to death, okay?"

Before Dedede could even ponder over the meaning of Escargoon's words, the snail wrapped his mouth around him and began.

Dedede let out a shuddering gasp, almost overwhelmed by this unfamiliar - but far from unwelcome - sensation. "Son of a bitch,"he groaned, gripping the silk sheets of the bed in an effort to show restraint. Had it been a year ago, Dedede probably would've made a smart-ass remark about Escargoon's mouth finally being put to good use.

Instead, he peered at the sight before him - something that only fueled his arousal. Escargoon's head bobbed back and forth, emerald green eyes meeting Dedede's blue ones immediately. The message there was obvious - I have you right where I want you.

And damn it, yes he did.

It was at that precise moment that somebody knocked on the door. "Uh, boss?"

Dedede bit back a yelp of surprise, looking from Escargoon - who made no move to stop whatsoever - to the door. The voice on the other side belonged to none other than Waddle Doo. "You just got mailed another birthday card. From the mayor, I think..."

"J-just - " Dedede gave a sharp intake of breath, trying to steady his voice. "Leave it under the door!"
There was a pause. "But - "

"You heard what I said!" the king yelled, using every inch of his strength to not let out undignified noises (at least not with Waddle Doo around to hear, anyway).

"Uh... alright then..." There was a brief pause before the envelope slid under the door, followed by the sound of footsteps retreating.

"Dammit, Goonie," Dedede hissed, irritated despite the circumstances, "you want someone to walk in on us?"

In response, Escargoon smiled cheekily, giving a non-chalant hum. Dedede growled at him, reaching over to gently grip the back of the smaller male's head. The familiar material of Dedede's gloves provided Escargoon with a sense of comfort, urging him to take more into his mouth.

Dedede inhaled sharply, trying not to make his squirming blatantly obvious (and failing, of course). Escargoon was moving slowly now; he was trying to get Dedede wound up and they both knew it.

Two can play at this game, the penguin thought, giving Escargoon's head a slight push forward. The moan that followed was one of surprise, and pleasure as well.

"You..." Dedede panted, "you gettin' off on this, ain't ya?"

Escargoon's eyes narrowed, as if taking this as a challenge. With one quick, sudden jerk of his head, he managed to slide the member all the way down his throat.

Dedede choked back a loud moan, gripping the silk sheets even tighter. Don't show him you like it... Don't give in!

Escargoon glanced up at him through half-lidded eyes. Had it been long before, the penguin would have wanted to knock that smug look off his face with his fist. He wouldn't do that now, of course, but he sure as hell wasn't going to let the snail get away with this. Not without a fight.

But the way Escargoon's tongue swirled around his member - twirling to the tip before sliding the whole thing down his throat again - was enough to drive him over the edge. The snail's movements with his tongue and mouth were graceful and sensual, putting the king, for once, in his place.

Giving into primal instinct, Dedede placed his other hand on the back of Escargoon's head as he began thrusting mercilessly into his mouth.

Not deterred in the slightest - if anything, he found Dedede's familiar roughness as a sign that he was doing things the right way - Escargoon abruptly pulled back, tightly gripping the base of the length in his right hand, greedily licking away at the underside of it.

At this, Dedede let out a sound akin to snarling. He was close - Escargoon could tell by the taste of him, and by the gleam in the penguin's eyes he'd come to recognize during their previous lovemaking sessions.

Dedede had slowed down now, chest heaving in and out from exerting himself so intensely. He shrugged out of his robe, tossing it aside. Escargoon decided to help him out, using his left hand to grab hold of the band around his waist and yanking it out of sight.

Not missing a beat, Escargoon returned to his previous task, moving hard and fast, feeling Dedede begin to violently quiver and tighten his grip around his head.

Three... two... one.

And then Dedede was gone, just as Escargoon predicted, groaning out the snail's name like some sort of bedroom hymn. He waited patiently until Dedede had finished, making sure to swallow every drop before popping the length out of his mouth, cleaning it of any remanents with his tongue.

Dedede had collapsed onto the bed, chest heaving up and down for breath. "Holy..." he murmured in a quiet, amazed breath, too stunned to even remember what he was going to say.

Escargoon pulled back finally, the last taste of Dedede's seed slithering down his throat. He licked his lips, giving a satisfied grin as he caught sight of his lover lying flat on the bed. "I told ya you'd like your surprise." The snail crawled onto Dedede, running his hands up and down his chest. "I bet no one has ever given you a gift like that before."

Instead of directly answering, Dedede took another deep breath. "That... was..." He was at a loss for words. "Wow..."

Escargoon couldn't help wishing he had a camera, because he never wanted to forget the look of absolute awe that Dedede was giving him now. It was kind of flattering, really.

"I take it that you liked it, then." He leaned over to give him a kiss. "Good, 'cause my mouth's feelin' a little numb. I'd hate to think I did all that for nothing." Escargoon smiled playfully and added, "Not that I minded. It was fun."

"I kinda figured," Dedede joked. "You made it clear as crystal that you liked it as much as I did." He studied the other male for a moment, curious. "How'd you do that, anyway?"

"Do what?"

"Get it to fit," Dedede answered bluntly. He was a big guy and they both knew it, after all.

Escargoon chuckled. "That's 'cause of my gag reflex, or lack there of. You can thank years of eating Kawasaki's trash for that."

Dedede couldn't help feeling amused. "Huh, I never would have thought of that. I guess I'll have to thank him."

"Thank him?" Escargoon laughed despite himself. "For making me able to shove your..." He blushed, unable to utter the word. "You-know-what... down my throat?"

"Well, it was an enjoyable experience for me!" Dedede ran his hands up and down Escargoon's sides.

The snail squirmed a bit at the touch. "Hey! That tickles..."

Dedede cocked an eyebrow in amusement. "I never took you for the ticklish type, Goonie..." He didn't let up, instead taking the giggle that escape his lover as a signal to continue.

"I-I don't know why I'm laughing," Escargoon managed to get out. "I think it's just the leftover nerves..."

"Nerves? You mean you was nervous?"

"Wouldn't you be nervous if you were putting your boyfriend's very intimate body parts in your mouth?"

Dedede pondered over this. "Nah," he said finally, tugging his gloves off as he spoke. "Not if it was you." He reached over, brushing his fingers alongside Escargoon's cheek.

The snail let out a little sigh, resting his head against the other male's chest. Dedede had pulled his ridiculous-looking pink hat off, and for that Escargoon was glad. That thing itched something terrible.
"You ain't fallin' asleep on me, are ya?"

"Mm-mm." Escargoon closed his eyes. "Just restin'. Unless you've had enough for the night, in which case yes, I'm gonna hit the sack."

A long pause.

"You really sucked the life outta me with that blowjob," Dedede said finally, letting out another sigh.

Escargoon's face flushed at the term. "Well... I guess that was the plan. I mean, it was your gift, and I really hope you liked it."

Dedede wrapped an arm around his lover, gently pulling him closer. "It was the best gift I've ever gotten, Goonie, 'cause it was from you."

"Who else would give you a you-know-what?" the snail joked, stifling a yawn. "Hopefully no one else..."

"What's with you and sex words?" Dedede asked, watching as Escargoon wiggled out of the ridiculous pink get-up he'd been wearing.

"They make me uncomfortable."

"The word blowjob makes you uncomfortable, eh?"

"Yes!"

"What are we supposed to call it, then?"

"Oral sex, Dedede. The term is oral sex."

"You know I don't like big words. They make my head hurt."

"It's three syllables, for crying out loud!"

"What's three syllables?"

"...Oral sex."

"You mean a blowjob?"

"You're a child."

"Ain't nothin' childish 'bout a blowjob."

Escargoon hesitated. "Was I good?"

"Do you even have to ask?"

"I'm just wonderin'..."

"It should be pretty obvious that it was good." To make his boyfriend feel better, the king added, "Not even good. You were great."

Escargoon's blush deepened. "I'm glad you enjoyed it." He stayed quiet for a moment, unsure what to say next.

Dedede decided to speak up. "Goonie?"

"Yeah?"

"You should wear that apron more often. It looks good on ya."

Escargoon gazed at the discarded apron on the floor, heart fluttering at his words. So he did like it. "Thanks." He gave Dedede a serious look. "But if you're gonna borrow it for some reason, don't leave it on the stove, whatever ya do. It's flammable."

"Yeah, yeah, whatever." Dedede grabbed hold of the blanket, ready to pull it over them both, when a thought struck him. "Shouldn't I... ya know... pay you back?"

"You don't have to." Escargoon pressed a kiss against the penguin's cheek. "Your pleasure is my pleasure, and I mean that."

~End.