Daring Do and the Museum Bureaucracy Adventure (SFW)

>The doors of the Equestrian National Museum slam open with a thunderous boom; the sudden sound threatening to knock the semi-conscious clerk manning the lobby counter from his seat.
>Squaring his glasses and re-settling himself on his padded stool, the pegasus secretary - Featherwright - glared openly at the sand-colored mare racing to him.
>"Quick! I need to submit an artifact to the museum!" she gasps, nearly slamming into the counter despite flaring her wings to reduce her speed.
>"That's hardly how one enters a museum, miss..."
>"Do. Daring Do," the adventurer puffs.
>Featherwright rolls his eyes,"Oh, please. Another 'Daring Do', come to submit their 'greatest discovery'?"
>Seeing the mare's face contort with confusion, Featherwright waves toward a stack of...stuff, at the end of the lobby to his left.
>A massive pile of assorted books, trophies, papers, and all manner of junk lies untidily against the wall - most bearing logos, phrases, or at least the colors of Daring Do from her varying adventure novels.
>"Every year when the DDC comes around we get a surplus of 'rare artifacts' submitted by every Daring Do look-alike under Celestia's sun," Featherwright explains with a heavy sigh, "So if you've come to give me another copy of A.K. Yearling's newest novel, or a poster bearing her signature, or your homemade Ahuizotl costume, please do us both a favor and just place it with the appropriate reverence in that pile over there and we'll make sure to examine it thoroughly in the near future."
>"I...what? That happens?" Daring Do shakes her head, "No, this is different! Seriously! I have the 7-sided Chest and it needs to be in the museum's care for protection from those who would seek to sell it for profit!"
>"Do you have said non-euclidean chest in your possesion, miss....?"
>"Daring Do."
>Featherwright rolls his eyes, "Right. Well, Miss Do, have you filled out the appropriate submission paperwork already?"

>"Paperwork? The museum has never made me-"
>"Yes, the previous clerk was removed for failure to adequately follow proper procedures - hence why I, the Administrative Head of Artifact Acceptances, am now manning the front desk," Featherwright sighs, "A role I thought I'd never have to return to following my initial internship."
>"Look, uh, Mr...."
>"Featherwright."
>"Mr. Featherwright, please, you have to understand that this artifact is irreplaceable and a window into the times of our great ancestors but some bad individuals seek to sell it for personal profit! It needs to be put in a secure location within the museum to keep it from their greedy clutches, and preserve our history!"
>"Very inspiring, Miss Do. But as I asked; do you have the appropriate paperwork?"
>"Well...no."
>"Then please, take these forms-" Featherwright reaches under his desk, pulling a massive stack of paperwork hundreds of pages thick and dropping them heavily on the desk between Daring Do and himself, "-and bring them back to me once you've filled them all out appropriately."
>Pages flutter from the top of the stack, gracefully circling Daring Do in her slack-jawed disbelief as they make their way to the floor.
>"You can't be serious," she finally sighs.
>"Oh, but I am. The museum has very strict standards for submissions and a process for consideration. Even if you are who you say you are - which I find doubtful given the circumstances - even you must follow procedure."
>"Oh come on!" Daring Do exclaims, "Just look at the chest, you'll see it belongs in the museum!"
>Featherwright rolls his eyes before sighing.
>"Fine, fine. If it will appease you. Please show me this 'artifact' you would like to submit."

>With a self-assured grin, Daring Do produces an object from the satchel on her side.
>"Behold! The 7-sided Chest of Chico Maztaht!"
>Featherwright's eyes widen slightly as the onyx-black chest is placed beside the stack of procedure paperwork; the turquoise gemstones that line the chest's top reflecting dimly in the museum lobby lighting.
>"That's....rather impressive, Miss Do," he says softly, as though trying not to disturb the chest with his voice, "It's not really 7-sided though now is it? I mean, the top is angled into 7 directions but-"
>"That's not important!" Daring Do brings her wing to cover her face, "Look, it's a legitimate artifact, in need of protecting. Can we just..." she taps the stack of paperwork gently with her wing, "Make all this, go away? I'm not trying to gain anything, I just want this chest in a safe place."
>Featherwright looks up from the chest, then subtly nods.
>"I...suppose I can make an exception, this once-"
>"Thank, goodness."
>"Provided, of course, you can tell me what is inside this chest, exactly."
>"I-Inside the chest?"
>"Yes, Miss Do. I need to know what is inside the chest so I can put it in the appropriate section. Or is it empty?"
>"I-uh, well, the legend didn't really say, so..."
>"So you don't know?" Featherwright raises an eyebrow inquisitively, "You...didn't open it before coming here?"
>"I was in a rush, alright?"
>"Rush or no rush, I would like to know what is inside this inadequately named chest, Miss Do. Would you be opposed to opening it?"
>"Well, not exactly-"
>"Alright then. Would you care to do the honors, Miss Do, or should I?"
>Daring Do snatches the chest off the desk before Featherwright can grab it himself, "I think I've got it. You know; just in case?"
>Featherwright blinks blankly, "Just in case, what?"
>"Oh, you know; In case of an ancient curse, forbidden knowledge, or moldy food. Standard dangers."

>"A-ancient curse?" Featherwright's stool creaks slightly as he leans back from Daring Do and the chest in her hoof, "M-Miss do, if you believe the item is cursed I would-"
>"The legend didn't say anything about a curse, Featherwright, relax," Daring Do gives the clerk a mischievous wink, "I'm sure it'll be fine."
>Daring Do places her free hoof on the top of the 7-sided chest with only a hint of nervousness.
>"Alright, here we go! On three."
>Featherwright takes cover behind the desk; only the top half of his face exposed.
>"One. Two. Three!"
>Daring Do yanks at the lid with all her might, and nearly throws the chest behind her with the effort as the lid refuses to separate from the rest of the chest.
>"C-careful!" Featherwright yelps, ducking behind the counter completely before sheepishly poking his head back out.
>"Huh. Lid is stuck pretty good. Then again, it's been in there for how many years without being touched; I guess I should've expected this."
>"It...won't open?" Featherwright mumbles.
>"Let's try again!" Daring Do exclaims, bracing her hind legs for another focused effort, "And remember; if it opens and something strange pops out, book it!"
>"Miss Do perhaps it would be better if we-"
>"One!"
>"Miss Do!"
>"Two!"
>Featherwright bolts from his position behind the counter - a sudden brown blur of motion as he streaks to Daring Do and snatches the 7-sided chest from her grasp.
>"O-on second thought I'll just..take this off your hooves for you, Miss Do, and place it in our 'potentially dangerous and not suited for display' vault! Y-yes, I think that'll do nicely, don't you?"
>"A vault, huh? Is it guarded?"
>"By both spells and Royal Guards themselves!"
>"So, no pony will be able to get to it?"
>"Only authorized personnel!"
>"And you won't open it, will you?"
>"NEVER," Featherwright covers his mouth at his sudden outburst, before answering in a slightly less wavering tone, "I-I mean, no, of course not Miss Do."

>"Suits me!" Daring Do grins widely before tipping her explorer's hat forward, "Thank you, Mr. Featherwright, for your understanding."
>"Y-yes, Miss Do, just - please, contact me ahead of time if you plan to bring anything else like this so I can have the paperwork filled out and ready for you," he swallows hard, "A-and some professionals to deal with handling such...rare and, uh, potentially hazardous, artifacts."
>The stallion holds the chest away from his body, as if afraid the chest will bite him at any moment.
>Daring Do laughs as she turns and begins to stroll from the museum lobby, leaving the nervous clerk stiffly walking into the depths of the museum to secure the 7-sided chest.