Villainous thing for fun
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Kungaloosh

The camcorder clicks on
Blackhat, esteemed master of evil and purveyor of fine wares enters.
"Hello there villains lesser and lesser alike, it's me, blackhat, back again with another fine invention."
He begins walking to the right, the camera tracking him.
"How much do you get done? Do you ever feel like you'd have the whole world under your thumb if there were just one more of you? Well fret no longer!"
He approaches a closed display box and happily flings it open, presenting... an empty stand.
He doesn't seem to notice.
"This easy to use device can temporarily convert one of your hapless minions into a perfect copy of someone much smarter and much better looking... you! Just scan yourself..."
He attempts to pick up a gun that isn't there.
At last, blackhat notices his missing device.
"FLUB!"
Dr.Flub, bent with fear, stumbles into shot.
"Y-yes sir?"
Blackhat taps his foot accusingly.
Flubs eyes fall upon the empty case.
"I-it's gone?! Oh no! Oh nonononono!"
"Oh YES! And where, pray tell, IS IT?"
Blackhat has grabbed flub by the collar and lifted him up to eye level.
A giggle echoes through the air.
Both flub and blackhat pause at this, looking around them before locking eyes.
"Dementia." They both state.
Blackhat drops flub and turns to adress the air.
"Dementia! Wherever you are, bring t hat gun here at once!"
"No!" A green laser flys out of the darkness and smacks blackhat in the side of the head. Flub falls backwards in surprise.
Blackhat rubs the impact spot in brief pain before shouting at the darkness again:
"Dementiaaaaa! You get out here right this moment!"
He almost seems... slightly shorter.
"You can't make me!" Taunts the girls voice.
"I can too!" Shoots back blackhat, rather uncharacteristically.
Flub watches in terror as red hairs begin to poke out from under his bosses signature top hat.
"But thats not the point! The point is, I am your employer, and when I order you to reveal yourself you have to!"
He stamps his foot in anger, feeling a little odd as it seems to come back down weird. From flubs vantage point its clear: the boss is shrinking.
As he dwindles from his imposing height, his dark skin seems off as well. Slightly lighter.
Dementia at last steps out of the shadows, giggling to herself and idly spinning the missing clone gun around her finger.
"Looking for this?
"Yes! Give!"
Next to each other, its startling. Blackhat is now the same height as his fangirl.
That wasn't all. His face seems to be gaining... a nose? Indeed, a protrusion is beginning to push out of the flat space that is the middle of his face, growing out and looking sort of feminine.
Blackhat claws desperately for the gun, but dementia evades his reach.
"If you want it back, tell me, how would you describe blackhat?"
"What? Describe myself?"
"Yup."
Dementia holds back laughter as she looks blackhat in the eyes. His monocle falls off and clatters to the ground as they lose their predatory evil look and look a bit more human. His skin is still lightening, approaching the edge of gray.
"I am..."
"Ut ut, describe blackhat."
Hair is now starting to really burst out from under his hat. Green in the back and bright red in front. As some of the red flops out, it falls over one of his eyes. A bit like dementias.
"Fine. BLACKHAT is..." unsure of what to say, he says the first thing that comes to mind. "Absurdly good looking."
"Heck yeah!"
Blackhat skin has now lightened considerably, warming to a human flesh tone.
Flub is stammering in terror as he watches blackhat change.
Hair has begun to really shoot out of the back of his hat, falling out in bright green waterfalls and quickly reaching the ground.
But, as it hits the ground, it curves away from it, spiraling up into a big pointed turn.
"Blackhat is really good looking! So smart too..."
"He really is!"
As blackhats skin finishes lightening, reaching a pale tone not dissimilar to dementias, changes have begun to enact themselves on his face. To match his softened eyes, his teeth begin to lose their points, squaring off and becoming more human. He grins, now looking goofy rather than terrifying.
"He dresses so nicely."
"And his voice makes me swoon every time!"
"And his inventions are always genius!"
Flub can't even tell which one of them is saying what, as blackhats voice cracks, shifting into an exact copy of dementias. His speech patterns are changing too, to match her excited pace and fangirlish demeanor.
Yet more changes were in store however, as blackhats body begins to thin, losing its angular, masculine look and dwindling into curves and female skeletary build. Most noticeably, his hips push out, leaving his thin rectangularness behind in favor of new round shapes. His waist pulls in, and most importantly, his chest pushes out. A sudden feeling of lightening down below signifies that the impossible has happened. Head to toe, blackhat, terrifying villain and super genius, has become an exact twin of his own giddy fangirl.
The two dementias laugh together as they chat about meaningless things. (Currently the smell of black hats cologne, Evil for men #5)
Dr.Flub stands up hesitantly.
"Ex-excuse me dementia..."
Both turn to face him, grinning.
"Yeah?" "Yeah?"
The two answer in unison, before having a giggle fit at the timing.
Flub wonders how to handle this.
"So... blackhat is going to be out of commission for a bit. As I'm sure you both know. As such, I think we can probably take a couple days off from business."
"Yay!" "Yay!"
"Ooh, hey! We should make him a cake for when he gets back!"
"That's a great idea!"
"We can make devils food! That's his favorite."
"Hey dementia..."
"Yeah dementia?"
"Do you know how to make cake?"
"Nope! Do you?"
"Nope!"
The two headed for the testing labs exit arm in arm, giggling madly.
"Ooh, we gotta get you a better outfit first though!"
Flub stares as they left.
When hes sure theyre gone, he picks up the clone ray from where it's been discarded. He then smashed it on the ground as hard as possible.
"One of her was bad enough... 2 weeks with two is going to be a nightmare."
A crash could be heard in the distance.
"Oops!"