#PastebinMonday 07/01/2019

SGDQ 2019 Recap Edition

Hey guys, how's it goin'?

I still have so many feelings to mentally sort through to properly recount my SGDQ 2019 experience. However, when thinking back on everything I did while I was there, I keep finding myself coming back to a single word to describe the majority of the experience:

Regret.

Before I go into great detail about what I regret about the GDQ experience, let me go over the highlights of it--the highs were pretty high. For instance, I was in the stream room for the entirety of Keizaron's Pokemon Crystal run, definitely a must-watch for fans of Pokemon and/or memes. The atmosphere in that room was unlike any I had ever experienced from a run in the middle of the marathon. Surreal. I was also able to couch for WinnerBit's runs of Looney Tunes (GB) and Rhino Rumble on Thursday. It was my first exposure to going to a "green room" before going on stage and getting powdered up for the camera. GDQ really has stepped their game up in recent years. I didn't really think that I would get to see Rhino Rumble on a GDQ stage, but there I was, with a front row seat, attempting to explain how it worked to a much more significant audience than maybe it deserved. I also got some saps to play the first Pokemon Master Trainer board game with me. Pardon my French, but the endgame of Pokemon Master Trainer is FUCKING BULLSHIT. To beat a final boss, you need 1. a top percentage Pokemon (red or yellow chip--you are not going to be able to get a full evolution set); 2. two attack bonus cards of at least +3 (max. is +5); 3. your dice roll to be high (like, 5 or 6); 4. the boss's dice roll to be low (like, 1 or 2); and 5. to hope you're up against Lorelei or Bruno. You practically have to invent new rules to win otherwise. The rest of the game is quite pleasant, actually.

Speaking of Rhino Rumble, I will be racing the game against WinnerBit at Handheld Heroes on July 13. You can watch the entire weekend of handheld gaming action at twitch.tv/speedgaming.

Those moments, alone, were worth the price of admission. That said, for all that was there to do at the venue and nearby, I got bored really quickly. I wanted to go to GDQ to have a bunch of unforgettable experiences I could only have there, but I didn't really get very much of that. I spent a lot of time walking around looking for things to do... and finding nothing... and subsequently feeling tired. I saw Toy Story 4 with my friends... and realized why I don't watch movies. I need to be interactive with my entertainment in order to be mentally engaged. I could not pay any attention to the movie the entire time. I played in some puzzle game tournaments on site... and promptly got eliminated because I don't play too many other puzzle games. I just played the games and ducked out as soon as I got eliminated because nothing else about the tournaments interested me. I also had some lunches with some friends... more like kept to myself eating food with other people I knew near me. I'm still recovering from that TGI Friday's midnight meal. I also played a few games with friends... and promptly wished I could have recorded them for other people to absorb. I also wish I could have been more equipped to hold a proper Puzzle League tournament at GDQ. I think I will make an effort to change that for future GDQs.

It also hit me pretty hard during the week there that 1. I don't like many of the games that most people like; 2. I hate small talk; and 3. I don't have very much to talk about. I work, eat, sleep, and speedrun. That's it. (Not in that order.) None of those traits are conducive to meeting new people and making new friends. Then again, neither is the anxiety I tend to get when I have to start thinking off the cuff. It may not always look like it, but quick thinking is something that I wish I had. My inability to think quickly rears its ugly head the most in social situations. Even holding a casual conversation is a great challenge for me. It always fills me with great trepidation. I had always associated my issues with social anxiety, but the anxiety comes up in more than just social situations. I don't know if I'll ever be able to overcome this.

All that in mind, however, I am not going to trade this experience for anything. If anything, I hope that this motivates me to push myself to make my own future GDQ experiences more fulfilling. Since I had no runs to do this time around, I wanted to take this opportunity to hang out with the people that I knew. Turns out that I need to do more than that to keep myself entertained the entire week.

That’s my life story for the week. And now I unpack. And then I sleep. Until next time, everyone, thanks for reading!

--Cards