F/A Mordred Backstory

───It was an uncomfortable dream.

Mother whispered into my tender ears:
"My dear son, become a knight and overthrow our king. As my son, you have a right to the throne. However, should the king knows of this now, he will surely...... Therefore, for now we must lie low; for now we wait."

I don't want to hear
Noises appear.
I don't want to hear
Ill will emerges.
I don't want to hear
I wish to ignore them.



An artificial life, born of a twisted lineage; I grow faster than others, age faster than others, and shall die faster than others.
While those innocent children are frolicking about in the village, I am already practicing the art of swordsmanship ─── yet we are of the same age.
By the time they reach adulthood, I shall have already withered and passed away.

I admire them. I envy them. I hate them.

So I swore to become a being that surpasses mankind; I must outpace them.
It was given that I shall be superior to everyone else.

Led by Mother, I gazed at the figure of the king from the dark.
Valiant. Calm and determined, like steel.

"That is your target. The enemy that must be defeated. The king that must be overthrown."

Impossible, I thought.
Because the king was so perfect.
His decisiveness. His swordsmanship. His tactics. No matter which aspect you look at, he was only too perfect.

Therefore I gave up defeating the king, although this means I must betray Mother. I decided to join him, to become his blade and cleanse the filth.

───I will become a knight.

The process of growth happened in just a blink of the eye. One day, Mother gave me a helmet. "You must not take off your helmet in front of others. If your face is seen, all will be lost."

As Mother commanded, I put on my mask. Even so, my swordsmanship and chivalry was perfect ─── it was because of this that I received my sword from the king and became his knight. Even though I was the least among them, I was still qualified to sit on the Round Table.

Those days of joy indeed passed by quickly.
As a knight, I cut down those who sought vengeance against the king.
"Why do you oppose the king?" I asked.
───And he replied,
"The king was too perfect."

Foolish. That is exactly why the king is so excellent. In the long span of history, there is probably not another king who is so perfect.
Most of the kings are a tyrannical bunch, proud and arrogant, making their pleasures the happiness of the people. The king gives them a dream and the king snatches it away; even after their dreams have been taken away, he behaved as if nothing happened. A disaster that came and went as it pleased.

"It does not matter who the king is. The people exists to be exploited."

The King of Knights have no selfish desires. What he possesses is limited to necessities; there is nothing beside him that is not necessary. He does not dream and possesses no dream.

Endeavoring to unify his fatherland, Britain - that is his simple life.

His existence was clear and beautiful like a polished blade. I admired him and looked up to him. I devoted myself to chivalry just as I felt immense shame at my birth.

I can say with certainty that it was the happiest and most brilliant period of my life.




......The end came quickly. From Mother, whose plans I thwarted, I knew of my true birth.

I was not the child of Morgan, enemy of King Arthur. Although I did not understand the exact method, I was his clone, his true son.

I was overjoyed. The King of Knights that I so admired actually had such a close relation with me. I was the only knight that inherited his blood.

───That is to say, I am the only one qualified as the successor of the King of Knights.

I told King Arthur everything. The reasons that I had the right to be his successor, every single one of them. The king did not change his usual attitude and told me coldly,

"───I see. Although it was due to my sister's treachery, you are indeed of my blood. However, I do not consider you my son, nor do I intend to pass to you the crown."

To speak of the crown was admittedly too hasty. The choice of a successor need not be made in a moment.

However, he did not consider me his son.
Those words wounded me deeply. Deeply.

That should have been the precondition for everything.
I believed that, this at least, he will be willing to accept.
Even if he cannot admit it in public, due to the problem of succession, I could understand.

In a conversation with just the two of us, he would have told me his true feelings. He would praise me, the son he was so proud of. That was all I asked───

"───You say you do not consider me your son, King of Knights."
I murmured.

The king who turned his back never expressed any care to his knight. He simply left.
My voice, filled with hate, contained spite to a degree I never experienced in my life.

But after I gave it some thoughts, I realized that this was a matter of course. A child created by his enemy, Morgan, by force. Who would admit that it was his own?
To the king, I was but a curse.

After that, I was placed the least among the knights. My excellence was not appreciated. My enthusiasm drew envy. My efforts were ignored.

Only because I was made by Morgan───just because of that was I never forgiven!

"Very well. I shall make you regret those words."





I made my decision then. Let hatred change myself. Depreciate everything my father had done. Be they the fruits of politics or warfare; everything that the king spent ten years to acquire, I shall make them worth nothing.

The king will hate me───that cannot be helped.
The king will punish me───let him, if he can.
The king will pay attention to me───if I can see him face to face, I am willing to sacrifice everything.

The long war for Britain drew to an end. After overcoming many difficulties, the nation shall become one under the rule of the King of Knights.

Warfare brings glory to the knights, but misery and poverty to the poor. As such days neared its end, discontent grew.

The king dealt with such matters without a change in his countenance. However, I knew that he must have felt great sorrow in his heart───yes, just imagining that made me smile in content.

The adultery of the Queen, Guinevere and Sir Lancelot of the Lake, a peerless man.
The one who made this affair escalate out of control was no other───it was I.

Rumors saying the king was unfit to rule appeared, especially concerning the incident with the queen. Even as I conspired with the knights disaffected with the king, I served him loyally.

It must have been bitter to the king. The knight who claimed to be his son was loyal to him even now.

Ah───his face full of gloom, as if right in front of my eyes. Thus, King Arthur made his first and last fatal mistake.

To punish Sir Lancelot, the knight betrayed him, King Arthur decided to lead an expedition to France. I was of course ordered to stay behind and command in his absence.

That was a matter of course. Through the ministers and other knights, I advertised my superiority. In fact, there was no need to advertise, since I was the only knight capable of administration.

The king named me regent and set off for France. To fight against the Knight of the Lake that he trusted in the past, how depressed must that have made him?

I estimated that the war against France───against Lancelot will be bogged down, so I immediately declared the news that King Arthur died in battle. In an emergency council, I made others accept the fact that I, the regent, was qualified to be king.

I retrieved from the vaults the symbol of kingship, "
Clarent
The Brilliant Sword of the King
" and held my coronation at Canterbury. Although it was only in form, I still became king.

After that, I proposed to Guinevere.

"Why do you speak of such foolish things?"

To the cold Guinevere, I laughed and said,

"The ones who are really foolish are you two, with your fake marriage."

I took off my helmet as I mocked them. Her frozen look in that instant was unforgettable.

The proposal had never been serious. However, the king's hatred towards me would grow. That is fine; hate me, spite me; hate me even more.

Of course, the deceit was seen through quickly. King Arthur arrived back at Britain from France.
Normally, I should have been killed when the lie was discovered. Although I was given command, I would surely be punished for making such a mess. However, those who were coerced, enticed or persuaded by me all stood at my side without exception.

It might partly be that my words were very persuasive.
However, the fundamental reason was that the people harbors discontent towards the king.
As for why, it was probably that the king was absolutely reasonable, absolutely cold; no matter who it was, he can discard them if necessary.

They said that, compared to the king, I was a more humane knight.
There has to be a limit to their foolishness.
I have never held affections towards any person other than myself.
Humans are beings that are no good besides talking.

Be they innocent children or adults, this is not changed.
If you throw in a piece of meat, they will start fighting for the spoils.

I did not slaughter humans only because I had no hatred towards them. Although they are to me but swarms of insects, I do not hate them.

Therefore I picked whatever strategy I wanted to pick. I acted without considering those who followed me.
But strangely, I was said by people to be more like a human.

───The king who wanted to save every single person was denounced as not understanding their feelings.

───I, who never considered saving anybody, was praised for understanding them.

Laughable.

I did not betray him for any of you, but for me alone.

If you want to follow me, so be it. I will not waste any time on you. I am not interested in you, who abandoned the king who took every care for you and flattered me.

Thus, the last war began.





Although the battle of Dover was lost and the enemies landed, we slew the exhausted Sir Gawain.

After some skirmishes, I finally stood against the king on the hill of Camlann.
At this moment, the fate of the nation shall be decided, no matter who is the victor.

Even then, the king was calm.

I repeatedly called my father's name on the battlefield. Every time, his soldiers would surround me and I would scatter them.

I killed, I killed, then I killed. I cannot help but wonder why things turned out like this.
From others' points of view, this must be very boring and very foolish───I do not care.

As Mother prophesied, I became the one who doomed the kingdom───I do not care.

I engulfed the entire nation in warfare just because of my own hatred───I do not care, I do not care, I do not care!

"AR───THUR───!!"

The King of Knights finally responded to my call───thus, the final duel began.




......The victor had been determined.
The king's holy lance pierced my breastplate.
This was my defeat; no, rather, it was my victory.

After all, everything that the king has, I have reduced to nothing.
So, look at me, hate me. Curse my name, let hatred twist your face, and howl.

But, even to the very end, the king had refused to acknowledge my existence.

He turned to leave after ascertaining my demise with his emerald eyes. Without a word, without a tear, and without hate.

That was when I understood.

───Ah, indeed.
───They were right.
───The king does not understand his people.

I admit the king was perfect even to the very end. However, that was precisely the source of my hatred. O perfect king, even if you are perfect, your reign was a failure.

If I were to rule, I would have been able to accomplish it. Where the king failed, I shall succeed.
Father, if you are the perfect king, then I will certainly surpass you.
Ah, just give me one more chance. Just once more, give me the chance.
As the king did, let me draw the sword of selection.
Just, once more───