The Runner's High

The Runner's High: Part 1

I walk briskly into the clubroom, pushing open the door with one hand. I see the girls standing in pairs exchanging their poems, immediately all heads turn towards the threshold as I scamper inside and place my gym bag and my backpack on the floor at the nearest desk.

"Anon!" Monika smiles at me "Glad you could join us. Were just exchanging poems now so you arrived just in time." Sayori starts waving at me excitedly.

I nod, give a little wave back and start getting my poem out of my bag. I feel the eyes of the other girls linger on me for a few moments before their attention is drawn back to the poetry they are reading and discussing. Poem in hand, I approach the group and wait patiently for one of them to be finished discussing so I can partner up. I feel painfully aware of the fact that I'm wearing my gym clothes and that I probably smell of sweat. I silently curse the gym teacher for keeping me today, and then I curse myself for going along with his idea.

"Track...", I think derisively to myself.

I don't have much more time to brood however as Yuri returns Sayori's poem and both girls turn towards me.

"Hi anon!" Sayori says warmly "I'm so glad you made it today, I thought you got detention or something bad."
"Nah nothing like that, the gym teacher just held me a little late today to run a few laps."
Sayori looks at me quizzically "Why would he do that? Your last period today isn't even gym."
"I'll tell you later" I reply, aware of the dwindling time we have left in the club today.

I turn to Yuri, only to find that she has vanished from her spot in the corner of my vision and is loitering around the edge of the room. Oh well.

I give my poem to Sayori and she takes it enthusiastically. A few minutes pass in silence before Sayori looks up at me with a smile. "This is really good Anon, I like the rhymes a lot."

"Thanks, I tried to give it some more structure. That book Monika lent me helped a lot."
Sayori nods "Yeah that one really helped me as well. Freeform is a nice way to get your feelings out, but sometimes to really bring out your heart you need to have some rules in your writing. Good job!" Sayori gives me another big smile and gives me her poem. It strikes me with its peaceful, almost pastoral tone describing a mama bird bringing food back for her hungry babies. Watching them grow, helping them to leave the nest, and then ends on a bittersweet note with the mama bird being alone as her babies have gone away. I can read the veins of sadness in the writing, and the foreshadowing of the birds gone away from their mother from the start and I once again feel amazed at Sayori's sensitivity to feelings of melancholy and nostalgia and her ability to express them through such a simple metaphor.

"Sayori, I'm really impressed. I feel like I'm seeing a whole new you in this club sometimes."
Sayori's cheeks flush "I haven't changed or anything, this is just another part of me I guess."
We look at each other in silence and for a moment. The face of the girl who I've lived next to for my entire life suddenly becomes the face of someone I feel like I hardly know. These past few weeks in the literature club have made me more unsure about Sayori than ever.

"W-well I guess I should go show my poem to the others. I have to catch up since I was late." I stammer, suddenly feeling more than a bit awkward.

"Oh...sure." Sayori replies. I hurry over to Yuri and say hello before handing her my poem.

I share my poem with the other girls getting passing marks from Yuri, Natsuki, and Monika with the latter being especially pleased my use of the interlocking rhyme scheme suggested for beginners in the book she lent me. Monika and I were the last ones to share our poems and once she hands it back to me she says "So Anon, what was the hold up today? Did you lose track of time in the gym? I have to say I didn't figure you for the athletic type." She says the last part with a smile.

"Ah no I'm not really that athletic" I reply a bit embarrassed at the direct question. "The gym teacher wanted to see me after class today to do some laps. Sorry I was late."

"That explains why you smell so sweaty" Natsuki says, wrinkling her nose at me.

"Natsuki you don't have to make him feel embarrassed" Yuri chides, "judging by how he rushed in he clearly didn't have time to shower and make it here in time."

Natsuki rolls her eyes "Right, we wouldn't want to be deprived of the sight of Anon in his short-shorts would we?"

I turn beet red, and I instantly despise the school gym uniform for being so ill fitting.

"Don't worry, its fine" Monika reassures me "I was just curious. Why did he need you then?"

By now all the girls have turned their attention to our conversation. "W-well he wanted to time me in a few of the runs. He wants me to run in the meet."

At this Monika raises an eyebrow and all the other girls give me curious looks "I had no idea you were such a good runner to be considered for the meet! You know I'm a bit of a runner myself, we should compare our speeds sometime haha."

I stiffen, did Monika just ask me to hang out with her after school? I don't know how to respond to that. "S-sure if you want. But I'm really not that fast. He only picked me because a few of the other runners can't make it and I'm decently ahead of the curve in my class. I don't expect to win anything."

"Well even so, just the fact that you're running means you have talent or he would't have picked you."

"Anon is just being humble, hes good at running!" Sayori chimes in, beaming at me. "He always smoked me in every race we ever had."

I keep to myself the fact that Sayori can't run a mile in under 10 minutes and is generally a below average runner. Instead I shrug and simply say "I like to run."

Yuri turns to me, looking as though something just occurred to her. "Wait...does this mean you're joining the track team? I don't see how you can be a part of this club and that one." Her eyes betray an instant of worry and it spreads to the other 3 pairs of eyes in room as well.

"Thats a good point Anon, you're not leaving the club are you?" Monika asks worriedly.

"Figures hes gonna leave just as soon as he got settled in." Natsuki grumbles.

Sayori says nothing but just stares at me expectantly, her eyes liquid blue.

"Don't worry I'm not leaving the literature club, coach just needs me to run in this one meet thats all. He offered me a spot as a backup runner though and I might take that." I reassure the girls, but it feels oddly nice to have them care so much about my presence here. "But I am gonna miss the meetings for the rest of this week. The meet is on Friday and coach is making me train for it after school."

"Thats understandable." Monika says "Well I hope you do your best! And I suppose you are excused from writing poems for the week as well." With that Monika turns to grab her bag and says "Well thats about it for today guys, see you tomorrow and good luck Anon!"


I go to get my bag as well and walk out into the hall with Sayori close behind. Were all walking down the hall together chatting when Yuri says to me "Anon since you're getting such a big break from writing remember to keep your skills up with a few exercises every now and again. A whole week without any writing and your skills are going to dull, just remember that writing is a skill like anything else and it has to be maintained with constant practice."

"Yeah you've come a long way from your writing at the beginning, wouldn't want you to slide back into your old habits." Natsuki comments as well.

"I didn't mean it like that!" Yuri exclaims. I can't tell whether shes saying it to me or Natsuki. "You have gotten better but you weren't bad before either. I-I w-was just trying to..." she trails off, unable to finish her thought.

I step in. "Its alright, I understand what you're saying. I do feel like I've come a long way though, when I first started this club I felt like there was no way I could compare. Now I feel a little more comfortable sharing although I'm still nowhere near the level of you all."

"Well you've had some great examples to follow" Natsuki says with a large grin, "we are pros after all."

"I think Anon has taken a little something from all of us" Monika says while tapping at her phone "but his development is still a product of his own effort. And you really have made a great effort so far Anon." Monika finishes her text and looks up at me to give me a smile.

"Writing, running, you really are developing into a man of many talents Anon" Sayori says to me skipping alongside me at my pace. "A long way from the person you were a year ago."

At this point all the blood in my body is in my face and I lower my head a little. "Jeez Sayori overstate it a little more why don't you? I haven't changed that much at all."

Sayori visibly considers this, giggles and says "I guess thats true! You still spend most of your free time watching anime and playing video games so I guess you haven't changed that much after all."

The other girls laugh in unison while Sayori characteristically seems oblivious to the comment she just made at my expense. "Yeah thanks Sayori" I say sarcastically.

"Well hopefully you don't spend all your free time that way." Yuri says shyly, her voice barely audible from next to me. "Have you made any progress in that book I gave you?"

"Uhhhhh"

Crap.

I haven't read a chapter of that in the past week.

"To be completely honest I kind of forgot about it." I admit ashamedly. "But I'll pick it up tonight, I promise."

Yuri gives me a small smile. "Its not boring or anything is it?"

"No its not that at all" I urge "I just...haven't read in a long time. I get kind of distracted. The book is intriguing so far."

"Well no rush" Yuri says to me, shifting the weight of her bag from one shoulder to the other. "Its not like its an assignment or anything, I just read fairly fast myself so I was curious about your progress."

"Don't worry Yuri" Sayori says "I'll remind him."

"Sayori shouldn't have to mom you" Natsuki says disapprovingly "also Sayori has told me what you watch and trust me when I say that you're not missing anything if you skip some episodes to read."

"I didn't realize my hobbies were a topic of such interest to you" I say back to her coyly.

"Uuuu" Natsuki seems temporarily unable to respond, then says "They're not! Sayori just never shuts up about you is all!"

Sayori laughs a little and looks down at her feet. "We've just known each other forever is all." She looks a little embarrassed by what Natsuki said. Sensing this, Natsuki quickly says "Its not like its annoying or anything, I uh..." she looks a little unsure about what to say "your stories are good ammunition to use against him. Its like a study on how bad a sense of taste one person can have."

We make it to the front of the school and I push open the doors, letting the girls walk through ahead of me. The schoolyard is totally empty and street beyond the gate is barren of any cars. The day feels slow and warm, and the sunny rays beat down on us until were all raising our hands above our eyes to see.

Monika turns to me.

"Hey Anon, wanna race to the crosswalk?"

"Umm why?"

Monika laughs "What do you mean why? You're racing in four days! You should be jumping at any chance to practice. And besides I want to test your speed."

"Ok then" I say, the my competitive spirit aroused by her challenge. "Its a little unfair though considering I have my running shoes and gym clothes on and you're still wearing the your uniform."

Monika starts taking off her school blazer, revealing her long sleeved button down white shirt. "Thats fine, if I lose then that just gives me an excuse for a rematch!" She turns to Yuri behind her "hey Yuri could you hold these for me?" Monika holds out her blazer and her vest. "Sure" Yuri says. She looks at us with interest, and so does Natsuki and Sayori I can tell. I know Monika is athletic, she was on the volleyball team for a while and I've even seen her play. She was fast, strong, and had an aggressive playing style. Shes such a kind and genuine person on the outside, but its not hard to reconcile that with her competitive spirit when you've seen it in action.

"Oh yay!" Sayori squeals "Monika vs Anon, this is like a battle of the titans!"

"Please Sayori" I say while beginning to stretch out my legs "I'm the furthest thing from a titan." I touch my toes and grunt a little in the effort.

As I stand up I notice Yuri looking at me. She quickly looks away, her face flushing. "S-sorry. I was just noticing y-your legs."

"My legs?" I look down at my legs. "What about them?"

"Ah..." Yuri refuses to make eye contact with me. I realize that I shouldn't have said anything. "I was just observing that they're fairly well toned...is all."

I feel flattered by Yuri's compliment but not wanting to cause any more awkwardness I simply say "Thanks, I don't really pay attention to that kind of stuff though. I don't work out super heavily or anything. I'm mostly living off the muscles I built when I played sports in middle school."

Yuri seems relieved by my dismissal of her awkward comment.

"Are you guys gonna talk and stretch all day or are you gonna run?" Natsuki suddenly says impatiently.

"Sorry, but stretching is important" Monika says in the middle of a hamstring sweep. "But I think I'm ready now, how about you Anon?" I notice that she untied her ribbon and undid the top button of her shirt. My eyes are momentarily pulled down to her collarbones but I force them back up into her smiling, eager emerald eyes.

"Yeah I'm ready." I jog in place for a second then swing my arms around. "Wheres the finish? The gate?"

"Yeah thats about a 200 meter sprint, should be good enough to test your skills." Monika bounces on the balls of her feet and then drops into a crouch. "Ready?"

"Yeah" I say as I drop into the same position beside her. Both coiled like springs, we crouch side my side. I tense my muscles. Feeling my heart beating fast already, I take some deep breaths. I want to impress Monika, but I really have no idea how fast she is. What if she completely destroys me? I'll look like a fool after all this excitement about my race. I try to quell my beating heart and focus on the path leading through the schoolyard.

Music: https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=BJ0xBCwkg3E

"I'll count it down!" I hear Sayori say from behind us.

"On go! On your mark!"

"Get set!

"Go!"

My coiled muscles explode into action, shooting me forth onto the path. I push my legs as fast as they'll go, the environment around me melting into a blur as I focus only on the gate ahead of me. My heart beats in rhythm with my feet. My lungs scream as I push myself harder and harder, faster and faster.

I see Monika in the corner of my eye, I can't tell if shes keeping pace with me or if shes behind, but I dare not turn to look at her lest she get the advantage. Its enough that she hasn't blazed past me. My seeming success gives me vigor and my legs pump even harder than before. Sweat beads down my forehead and I grit my teeth in excitement and pain. I was running really fast now, I can feel my body screaming at me to stop but I ignore it and push ahead. In my minds eyes I could see only Monika.

Perhaps Monika had a similar moment of adrenaline because my eye caught her inching further into my view. The gate was approaching fast now, and any distraction meant letting go of victory. I tried to push her out of my mind, but her flowing auburn hair and poofy white ribbon kept invading my eyes. Her legs were a blur, her skirt flapped about her hips like tissue paper in the wind. Her stride was perfect, her face was the very soul of determination.

I tore my eyes away from her and closed them, I worked my body like a taskmaster to make up for any ground ceded by my distraction. I pushed myself to my very limit, I felt sharp pain in my abdomen, my body pleaded with me to stop.

I didn't stop.

I felt a colossal force smash into me. My feet left the ground. I opened my eyes to see the world spinning above me. I tasted blood in my mouth.

"What..." I tried to say, but then words left my mouth as I slammed into a wall behind me. Or was it the ground? As stayed motionless for a moment, I determined that I was laying on the ground. The gate towered above me. My heart thumped in my chest, it beat so fast I thought it would explode. I sucked in air through my mouth, desperately trying to fill my lungs. What happened?

Suddenly a shadow stepped over me. A pair of emeralds, set in a beautiful face shining with sweat looked down at me. Her auburn hair fell around her cheeks I could see her white shirt clinging to the sweat of her athletic body.

"Are you okay?" Monika asked. She sounded pretty concerned.

I took a moment to respond. I realized that I was staring at her. "Y-yeah, I'm fine. I said, trying to sit up. My head immediately began to swim and my put my hand up to it. I felt a slick wetness on my forehead. "Ugh...what happened?" Monika crouched down next to me.

"You swerved a little left and crashed right into the gate! Were you closing your eyes?" The tone of her voice was even, but her expression betrayed her concern. How bad did I look exactly? Through her words I could hear her labored breaths, and her chest rose and fell heavily. Slick sweat shined on her face and around her neck.

"I uhh...yeah I think so. I closed my eyes and put my hand against my head again. A headache was forming, and I felt a stinging pain on my forehead. "Owwww". Monika put a hand on my shoulder. "You have a little blood there. I think you split the skin a little. How do you feel?"

I opened one eye and looked at her. "That depends, did I win?"

A smile immediately broke the concern on Monika's face. She let out a classic Monika giggle and said "Yes you did. I thought I was catching up to you at the end there but then you just careened ahead of me. You have quite the second wind, even if it did blow a little off course."

I won. I beat her. The elation I felt almost superseded the pain of my throbbing head. "Well then I'd say that I feel alright, despite the circumstances."

At this point I could hear the voices of Natsuki, Yuri, and Sayori calling out from behind me. I turned to look at them. Sayori rushed over to me and knelt beside me. Her eyes were wide and her voice filled with worry.

"Are you okay???? I saw you slam into the gate Anon! Ohmygod is that blood?" Sayori pulls me into a tight embrace.

"I'm fine, I'm fine. I'm just a bit stunned. Jeez you made it seem like I'm about to die."

Sayori let go of me and studies my forehead "Well okay. But it looked pretty nasty."

"So who won?" Natsuki's voice cut through Sayori's fussing.

"He did" Monika said, she was standing up now and leaning against the gate with one hand. She spoke through labored breaths. "He's real fast."

Sayori beamed at me "Good job Anon!"

Yuri nodded behind her "Yes well done. Your form was excellent. You really sell yourself too short."

"Ah, thanks." I moved to stand up. My headache persisted but my dizziness had subsided.

"I should probably get something to clean up my forehead, if my Mom sees me walk in with all this blood smeared across my face shes gonna have a heart attack." As if to emphasize, I spit in the grass next me and the saliva was blood red.

"Here" Yuri reached into her bag and pulled out a small packet of tissue paper. She pulled out a few and handed them to me.

"Ah thanks." I started to dab at my stinging forehead, wincing as I did so.

"I have something for that as well" she pulled a small black bottle out of her bag, unscrewed the cap and dabbed a piece of tissue into it.

"What is that?" I asked nervously as she approached me with it.

"Peroxide, it will keep it from getting infected. It will sting though, so get ready."

She began to dab at my forehead with the tissue and I let out a gasp. It really hurt.

"S-sorry!" She scrambled to say.

"Its alright, I know its for my own good." Part of me wanted to ask Yuri why she carried around a bottle of peroxide in her backpack but I decided against it. It was enough that she was helping me.

"Hopefully they dont have any big metal gates in the track meet." Natsuki said as Yuri was tending to my forehead.

I laughed. "Yeah hopefully not."

"I'm sure you'll find something to crash into though." Natsuki said this playfully, and she was unable to hide her relief at my being alright.

Yuri soon finished and put her things back in her bag. "Thanks nurse Yuri." I said, rubbing at my head.

Yuri smiled at me, playing with her hair "It was nothing."

I see Monika approach me and give me a sweet smile. "Well I'm glad you're okay, but I have to say that I'm going to be asking for that rematch." Her tone was as sweet as candy but I could see her eyes sparkle with excitement and determination.

"Count on it" I said in a challenging tone. "after all, I want to beat you on even ground."

Monika laughed and put her hands on her hips. "Consider it done then. We should go running together you know? It would be fun."

Holy crap. Monika just asked me to go running with her. My heart pounds.

"Yeah sure."

The words left my mouth with me unable to stop them.

"Great! I'll text you then and we can meet whenever you want."

At this we began to part, I said my goodbyes to Monika, Yuri, and Natsuki who went the way opposite Sayori and I.

Walking home with Sayori she doted on me a bit, but I reassured her that I was fine and a little rest when I got home was all I needed to get back to normal. As we reached our homes Sayori turned to me

"So I probably wont be seeing much of you for the next couple of days huh?" She sounded a little down.

"Well yeah, I guess. Since I'm not coming to the club for a bit." In all the time we've been spending together in the club and walking home, Sayori and I still never really hang out outside of school anymore.

"Well maybe I'll get up in time to walk to school with you."

"Haha yeah and maybe I'll suddenly stop procrastinating on all my homework. Its fun to list things that are never gonna happen."

Sayori puffs out her cheeks in a pout.

"Meanie! I'm gonna wake up even earlier than you and get to school before you even leave!"

I laugh and pat Sayori's head. "I'd love to see that."

I give her a smile and a wave and walk to my front door.

I would be out of the literature club for a few days, it would be the longest time I've spent without the Sayori and the others in a while. But today's race with Monika has changed my perspective on upcoming meet. I now wanted to actually do well, maybe I could do decent job. Maybe I wouldn't win but maybe I could get 2nd or 3rd place? Part of me knew it was wishful thinking, I was just a backup runner, these other boys have been practicing for this meet for a long time. But the other part of me felt motivated, a feeling I have been experiencing more and more since I joined the literature club.

I could do this, and I would.