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- The Pants In The Relationship part 3
- >"Thanks again for lettin' me hang around until this storm blew over."
- "Applejack, you thanked me seven times already, go home."
- >"Alright now. Can Ah expect you to be at Sweet Apple Acres on Saturday at six in the mornin'?"
- "Pff, you can't even expect me to be out of bed by noon."
- >She rolls eyes, "Welp, worth a shot to ask. You and your little love dove have a good night, now!"
- "Ugh, yeah whatever, bye."
- >You close the door and walk to the kitchen sink to knock out the dishes used tonight.
- >By now, it's a habit.
- >No matter how little the amount of dishes, wash them because the alternative would be the return of "The Sink of Mysteriousness".
- >You shudder at the thought. Neglecting dishes for two weeks is a deadly thing to do. The sink becomes a fucking magical biohazard.
- >Turning on the facet in the left sink, you squeeze some liquid dish soap into it while putting three cups and a spoon into the sink.
- >As the water accumulates, Ditzy flutters over unnoticed, scaring you half to death.
- >It's something about hearing fluttering wings approaching you at this time of night.
- >"Need some help?" Ditzy inquires, rubbing your left shoulder.
- "Not really, but thanks for asking."
- >You grab a dish towel and start busting some suds, and let the hot water blast the inside of the cups while making a swirling motion with them.
- >After a couple of short minutes, you already have the cups drip drying onto a dry dish towel.
- >You turn your back to the sink and cross your arms while Ditzy sits on a kitchen island across from you.
- "Alright, since that chore is out of the way now, sup?"
- >"Figured we can talk for a little while before we get in bed together," she replies, shrugging.
- >You had to close your eyes to keep from rolling them.
- “Could you not phrase it that way?”
- >Having an eyebrow go skyward, she flashes a confused look.
- >”What? I was just saying--Ooooh.”
- 1/19
- “Yeah, exactly.”
- >"But it's not like -that-, not yet anyway."
- >You clear your throat, ignoring that last bit.
- "Anyway, what did you want to talk about?"
- >”Our deal needs some tweaking.”
- “Tweaking?”
- >You shift your weight, leaning toward her.
- >”Mhm, it has to be two dinner dates now.”
- >Glaring at her, you notice a smile forming when studying her face.
- “You’re enjoying this way too much.”
- >”A little bit, mhm.”
- >You lean back, taking a deep breath.
- “Okay, so why do I owe you two dinner dates now?”
- >”Because of our 'break' from the pants thing.”
- “Oh come on, it was raining out there.”
- >"I'm not finished; you also didn't share any of that Alfredo, much less offered."
- "Alright, granted on that one, it was amazing."
- >"I know, I used to work at Bonnet's in my younger years."
- >You flash a look of genuine interest. Questions about her past form into your mind.
- "As a chef?"
- >"As a waitress, but I would always have a plate of it every Friday when I got off from work."
- "Nice, sounds like comfy times."
- >"You know what else is comfy?"
- "What?
- >”You and me sleeping together.”
- “Okay, now you’re just doing that on purpose.”
- >”Wait, there’s more,” she starts, fluttering up to you. “On a huge muffin~”
- >You’re not even sure how to react; you’ve never had to deal with a mare like this.
- >Even though she isn’t exactly the prettiest penny in the jar, she seems like a mare that you wouldn’t get bored with.
- >It's almost like you don't even notice her wandering eye.
- >Ditzy is what her name suggests, ditzy, but seeing this side of her makes you wonder if she’s actively redefining the word.
- >Almost.
- 2/19
- “On a muffin huh? Seems like a waste of a good treat.”
- >Ditzy strokes her chin with a hoof, putting on her thinking face for a moment.
- >Tilting her head to the left, she giggles, “yeah, you’re right. Hehehe!”
- >God damn that giggle, too cute.
- “So, bedtime?”
- >”Not -quite- yet,” she replies. “How about that dinner date tomorrow?”
- “I’ll get back to you on that,” you answer, walking toward the living room.
- >”Mkay, Anon, but it's not like you're doing anything tomorrow."
- "I'm broke as a joke right now. I gotta cut back on spending and all that."
- >That meal with Rarity and the others really knocked a dent in your wallet.
- >Fucking Rarity and her expensive taste.
- >Still the Alfredo was worth it.
- >"I'll pay."
- >You turn around to her just before you start to climb the stairs, your face perfectly conveying befuddlement
- >Ditzy stays afloat, aloof as if she's said nothing odd.
- "You wot, mare? You're going to pay for the dinner date?"
- >"Mhm. What's the big deal?"
- "That seems a bit backwards."
- >"True," she agrees, giving a nod, "but I did ask you out, not the other way around. So it'll be on me. C'mon it'll be fun."
- >You shrug, having a hard time seeing a downside.
- "Well, who am I to deny a free meal?"
- >”Figured you would go for that, now for the fine print.”
- “Aw fuck,” you say, looking up at the ceiling.
- >She punches your arm playfully, starting up another giggle storm.
- >”It’s nothing bad, hear me out,” she says with a smile. “You and I have to-“
- “Ditzy, I’m aware that I’m irresistible, but you gotta keep your urges for me under control.”
- >Another playful punch lands on your right arm.
- 3/19
- >”Well I can’t help it! You’re very snuggable! Don’t you even -think- of cutting me off!”
- >You cackle as you climb the stairs, but find you’re having trouble to keep walking.
- >That was both funny and adorable. Where has she been?
- >When you walk into your bedroom, you head for the window to close the blinds.
- >Crash land on the bed back first, letting out a sigh.
- >Only to groan when Ditzy lands on top of you, knocking the wind out of you.
- “Ooof! Damn it Ditzy!”
- >”I slipped, oops~”
- "Bullshit."
- >You close your eyes to finally get some sleep.
- >”But seriously, there really was fine print.”
- >You exhale through your nose.
- “And what might that be?” You ask, yawning afterward.
- >”You help Applejack on Saturday.”
- “Fuck. I think I’ll pass on that free meal.”
- >”Oh c’mon, you’ll get paid, not to mention I’ll help and won’t be in your way.”
- >You crack your eyes open for a moment to look at her.
- "You serious?"
- >"Mhm. Promise."
- "No pants hanging bullshit?"
- >"Not until after you've finished the project."
- >Well, that doesn't seem so bad.
- "Alright, sure whatever, deal, what time?" you ask with a yawn while you wrap your arms around Ditzy.
- >"How's seven in the morning?"
- "Great. Fine time."
- >Ditzy yawns into a hoof before nuzzling into your chest.
- >”Goodnight, Anon."
- "G'night."
- ---
- 4/19
- >You turn over on your left side facing the window.
- >A warm smile on your face from the smell of chocolate chip muffins lingering in your sheets.
- >However, your body isn't burning up like it usually would.
- >Although you'll admit the snuggling is totally comfy as shit.
- >Cracking open your eyes, you take note that Ditzy is out of bed.
- >You squint your eyes from the sunlight that leaks through the blinds.
- "Fuck, morning already?"
- >Shrugging, you go back to getting some shut eye.
- >That was the idea until you hear sounds of pots and pans colliding with the kitchen floor and a distinct "THUNK".
- >"Ow! Not cool!"
- >Another loud thunk and a series of clangs lead you to believe something is going down in the kitchen.
- >You sit up in bed, groaning.
- "Ditzy, what the hell..."
- >You get out of bed to see what the fuck this clumsy pony is up to.
- >You wouldn't want some sort of Final Destination death trap going on.
- >Sitting at the kitchen table with Ditzy, you shake your head out of pity.
- "How do you do this every day? Seriously?" You ask, handing Ditzy a bag of frozen peas.
- >Making a chuckle, she just shrugs while taking it.
- >"I just wanted to make coffee," she replies wincing while applying the frozen peas on the top of her head.
- "Ditzy, you shouldn't open cabinets. You're way too much of an easy target for Death."
- >Apparently, when Ditzy opened one of the cabinets, a pot that wasn't put away correctly was just waiting for the door to open so it can fall out.
- >Its target: Ditzy's head.
- "You alright?"
- >"I'm tougher than I seem!" She shoots back with an upbeat tone, beaming at you.
- "Ditzy, you're adurable."
- >"Nice one!"
- "How about you let me make the coffee, okay? Stay here."
- >"Okay!"
- 5/19
- >It only took a few short minutes to prep the coffee.
- >While you wait for it to brew, Ditzy seemed to be in her own world, same for you since you aren't officially awake yet.
- >Once finished, you and Ditzy gather around the coffee pot, pouring your own cups of the bitter bean.
- >Ditzy nudges your arm while she pours her cup.
- >"For future reference, how do you like your coffee?"
- "Well, I don't know about you, but I like coffee in my cream and sugar."
- >She snickers, but found you were dead serious when you didn't stop adding sugar after the fifth tablespoon.
- >"What are you going to do with all that energy?"
- "I’m going to the basement to set up."
- >She tilts her head in curiosity, "huh? Set up for what?"
- "Going to have company over, gotta clean up my bar and what not."
- >"You have a bar downstairs?"
- "Yeah, wanna check it out?"
- >"Mhm!"
- >"Nooo waaaay," Ditzy says with her mouth hanging open.
- >Her eyes behold the beauty of your basement, your pride and joy.
- >An L shaped bar with a nice mahogany finish, and bottles of liquor on the shelf behind it.
- >You have the usual stuff that one would expect behind a bar.
- >However, you need to stalk up on limes and lemons meaning you'll have to do some shopping today.
- >Some barstools, tables and chairs including a special round table in the corner for some good ol' fashion poker
- >It's a shame you don't have any beer on tap. Maybe after another big pay day you'll do just that.
- >In the meantime, a mini fridge with packs of beer will do fine.
- >You nudge Ditzy's side with an elbow.
- "Pretty cool right?"
- >She turns to you, nodding. "Coolest thing ever."
- "Yeah, anyway, I need to get cleaning."
- >"Hey umm, need some help?"
- "I'll be alright, thanks though."
- 6/19
- >"Maybe I can mop the floors? Set up the tables and chairs?"
- >Just from her asking the question you can already picture the disaster that can happen.
- >Not to be a dick, but you'd rather she keep her clumsy self away from the shelves of liquor.
- "Ditzy, thanks but, I've got this."
- >"Is there anything I can do to help?"
- >She can be so upbeat, so quick to offer help without even thinking twice about it.
- "Again, thanks for the offer, but I'm used to setting everything up by myself."
- >"Oh, okay," you notice her ears drooping.
- >Fuck, you didn't think she take that to heart. She's almost frowning now.
- >Taking a deep breath, a task comes to mind.
- "Actually, there is one thing."
- >And just like that, Ditzy's face lights up with a smile.
- >"Really? How can I help?"
- >You pull out a list from your pants pocket and hand it to her.
- "Could you get these items from the store? I'll need them for some drinks I've been craving."
- >She doesn't respond right away, just scans the list.
- >Looking back up at you, she beams, "what happened to cutting back on spending?"
- "It won't cost much."
- >"Mkay, but it's gonna cost ya."
- "There's always strings attached isn't there?"
- >"What? I just wanna learn how to bartend a little."
- >Ditzy?
- >A bartender?
- "You wanna learn how to bartend?"
- >"Well, yeah. Why not? I wanna learn from the best."
- >God damn her flattering.
- >This could be fun and it could help her be a little less clumsy.
- >You rub the back of your neck, keeping a humble smile on your face.
- "Well, I wouldn't say I'm the -best-, but--"
- >"I mean, doesn't having a drink after our dinner date sound fun to you?"
- "Sounds like a good way to start a weekend."
- >"Exactly! So, deal?"
- "Deal, now hurry back with the stuff alright?"
- >"Aww, gonna miss me -that- much?"
- >You roll your eyes while you making a shooing motion with your hand.
- "Just... go. You had too much coffee. The bits are on the kitchen counter."
- 7/19
- >"Hehehe, okay."
- >She flutters back upstairs while you walk behind the bar.
- >You walk over to the mini fridge and open it to grab you a beer.
- >Twist off the top, take a swig, and then you take in your surroundings, still proud of crossing the main thing off your bucket list.
- "Fuckin' sweet," you tell yourself while nodding in approval.
- >"Isn't it a bit too early for drinking?" Ditzy asks out of nowhere.
- >You look her direction to find her poking her head into the basement.
- "It's five o' clock somewhere in this multiverse," you say, shrugging your shoulders.
- >You start cleaning soon after your refreshment, mopping up the floors and sweeping up the corners.
- >You have the place smelling like some pony knock off version of Lemon Pledge.
- >Give the bar a quick wipe down.
- >Inventory check your liquor shelf.
- >Looking at your make shift bar, you take a deep breath.
- >You hear a set of hooves descend down to your basement.
- >You laugh in your throat, because there are only three ponies that would come into your house without knocking.
- >And one of them is running an errand for you, and another is currently working an eight hour shift at Sugarcube Corner.
- >Walking behind the bar, you grab your trusty towel and start to give the bar a polish.
- >Once the hoofsteps stopped at the bottom of the stairs, you toss the towel over your shoulder and cross your arms.
- "You're here early, Berry."
- >She trots up to her usual seat, a barstool that's at the corner of the L shaped bar.
- >Taking a moment to take a gander of her. You smell a welcoming grape aroma.
- >Her mane nice and neat, her fur shining.
- "What have we here?" You ask, walking over to her.
- >Standing in front of her, you only smirk, letting the silence fall for a while.
- >She groans, rolling her eyes.
- >"Ugh, hurry up with your smartass comment."
- 8/19
- "What? I was just gonna say you look nice," you reply, shrugging your shoulders.
- >"That's all I'm getting out of you, isn't it?"
- "And not a word more. So, how about a beer?"
- >"Too early."
- >You raise an eyebrow, moving your head closer to study her face to face.
- "Are you okay? Too early? For beer?"
- >"No, for ridiculous questions, yeah I'll have a beer."
- "Sweet."
- >You walk over to the mini fridge, grab a bottle of--
- >"Actually, you know what? I'll have a glass of Three Wise Mares."
- >You turn around, nodding while you break a smile.
- "Berry, you made my day, I haven't made that drink in a while."
- >You walk to your liqueur shelf to grab some Applejack Daniels, Joan Trotter, and Jamie Sun Beam.
- >You slide a Collins glass that has a third of each over to Berry.
- >Put the bottles back where they were while Berry enjoys her drink.
- >"Mmmmm~"
- >Facing her again, you can see her eyes light up.
- >"You're the only one in this town that can make this properly. Isn't it sad?"
- >You have to laugh. What the hell is so hard about the drink?
- "Crazy, I know. So, why are you here so early?"
- >Downing the rest of her drink, she puts the glass down and clears her throat.
- >"Free drinks? To see your handsome face? Take you upstairs and show you a good time?"
- "Nope, ain’t buying it. Talk."
- >"Ugh, fine. I need you to do me a favor."
- "Fuck."
- >You pinch the bridge your nose, preparing for something that'll probably screw you over.
- >Usually when she says, "I need you to do me a favor," the majority of the time it's borderline illegal.
- "Fuck, alright, let's hear it."
- 9/19
- >"Well, okay, so, I met this stallion at my new job, and he asked me out, claiming he wants to get to know me over a few drinks."
- "He doesn't know what he got himself into, poor bastard."
- >She punches your arm in response while you laugh it off.
- >"Shut up, I'm not that bad. Anyway, I told him about a nice quiet spot that I visit once every blue moon."
- "Okay, what does that have to do with me?"
- >She cringes, "I... -may- have told him about your little bar."
- "Wait, you just wanted to make sure if it's okay to have him here?"
- >"Well, there's more at stake, you see, he's my boss and I want to make a good impression."
- "Oh, gotcha."
- >"Now, I'm the last one to ever ask this but, can we tone down the rowdiness tonight?"
- "That's seriously it?"
- >"Mhm."
- >Well, that's a relief.
- "Sure thing, Berry, I'll let the others know when they get here."
- >"Thanks, Anon, you're the best. Now, can I get a Mojito and an Angel's Tit before I go?"
- "You can get out."
- >She laughs, making a teasing hoof wave.
- >"I'm just kiddin'. You don't mind if I keep you company do you?"
- >You shrug your shoulders.
- "Eh, I've got some time to kill before my date tonight."
- >Berry blinks a few times while tilting her head. Her eyes locked on you waiting for you to give up the info.
- >"Since when did you start going on dates?"
- "Since tonight. That's all I'm telling you."
- >Berry's face scrunches. "You never tell me anything!"
- "You've got the biggest mouth in town. If I told you that I'm getting married, Cadance would be sending me a letter of congratulations in the next hour."
- >"Oh that's ridiculous!"
- "What would be ridiculous is the fact that she'd be the last to know."
- >"Oh screw you, I don't blabber -that- much."
- "I'm just messin' with you. So, how about another shot of Three Wise Mares?"
- >"Make that three."
- "Whoa, slow down there, Berry."
- >"What? One for me and two for you. You gotta catch up, handsome," she says as she winks.
- "Alright, alright point made."
- 10/19
- >For the next twenty minutes, you and Berry chat about the week, catch up for the most part.
- >Sadly, not everyone is here yet who hangs out with you on Friday nights.
- >By the time Ditzy arrives, you've got a buzz going.
- >As she descends the stairs, Berry holds her sides to contain her cackling.
- >"Mother of Celestia, that joke had everything! A school house, a timberwolf, and lube! You are -filthy- Anon! HAHAHA!"
- "Would you believe me if I told you Rarity told me that joke?"
- >"Pfff, what?! You're full of it!"
- "I swear she did. Don't let her fool you."
- >"Special delivery for Anonymous."
- >You turn to Ditzy and give her the 'sup' nod.
- "There she is, bring on ze stuffs."
- >"Anon, I think you may have made that last one a little too strong."
- "Shuddup Berry."
- >Ditzy trots behind the bar and flutters next to you while holding a bag of lemons and lime.
- >"Wait a minute," Berry says, shifting her eyes between you and Ditzy. "You two actually know each other?"
- >You take the bag from Ditzy while giving her a thankful nod.
- "Yeah, she's my date tonight."
- >"Ahhh, it all makes sense now."
- "What are you on about Berry?"
- >"Well, there has been -some- talk about the two of you. But I didn't pay much mind until now. What’s up? You two a couple yet?"
- "Ha, funny."
- >"I'm working on it. We're already sharing a bed."
- >"Awwww," Berry says as she puts a hoof on her heart.
- "Ditzy, could you not."
- >Ditzy leans against you while rubbing the center of your back.
- >"He's a little shy to admit it, as you can see."
- "You snatched a beer on the way out when I wasn't looking, didn't you?"
- >The mares have a round of cackling.
- >"I miss this," Berry says before raising her glass and taking a sip. “Tonight is gonna be a good night."
- "Damn straight."
- 11/19
- >"So, what's the game plan? When should my date and I come by?" Berry asks.
- "Shit, I didn't even think about that. We gotta be back for you guys."
- >"Well, maybe we can catch an early showing of a movie then grab some lunch if we have the time?"
- "That doesn't sound like too bad of an idea actually. Won't be too many ponies crowding the place."
- >"So... what time should I drop by?"
- "Eh, seven-ish, pretty sure we'll be back before then, but just to be safe."
- >"It's barely noon, a lunch date and a movie takes at the latest three and a half hours."
- "What are you getting at Berry?"
- >"Why the extra alone time?"
- >Maybe it’s you, but you swear every mare has that same wry smirk.
- "Chilling most likely."
- >Ditzy flutters behind you and wraps her forelegs around neck, nuzzles her face against yours.
- >"Psst, Berry, 'chilling' is code for snuggling session."
- "God damn it Ditzy."
- ---
- >You have to admit, you should go to movies around this time more often.
- >Only a handful of ponies are in the theater.
- >Ditzy took the liberty of picking the movie.
- >'Dating Chaos' is the title.
- >You weren't really all that hyped about it until they established the premise.
- >About some stallion trying to put up with Eris as his neighbor.
- >Hilarity ensues.
- >What's kinda crazy though is that Eris is -actually- in the movie, playing as herself.
- >You got to give credit where credit is due, that's pretty cool.
- "I can't believe they actually got Eris," you whisper to Ditzy.
- >"Mhm, she's actually pretty down to Earth. Funny too, you'd like her."
- "What? You've met her?"
- 12/19
- >"I deliver mail in some of the strangest places in Equestria, you'd be surprise who I've met in all the years I've been working just as a mail mare."
- >"SHHHHH!" some pony says who's in a row just in front of yours.
- >It took all your strength to hold your tongue, because the fucker was about to get an earful.
- >Ditzy rubs a hoof on your lap did help calm you down though.
- >"Popcorn?" Ditzy offers while chewing on a mouthful.
- "I'll pass, trying to save room for lunch."
- >"SHHHH!"
- >You glare at the pony that's getting under your skin.
- "Stop listening so hard you Nazi."
- >The stallion looks back at you.
- >"We gonna have a problem?"
- "If you keep shushing us, yeah, it's not like we're shouting. Now eighty six that shushing shit."
- >He turns back around mumbling under his breath while Ditzy mouths 'sorry'.
- >You shrug it off then go back to watching the movie.
- >Your eyes glued to the screen while you lean back and relax, and admire the fact you're having a good time.
- >For a moment, it's like you forgot why you're supposed to reject going out with ponies.
- >And for the time being, your buzzed mind is simply saying, "Its fucking Friday, get off your high horse for a day and have fun, God damn."
- >That's exactly what you plan to do.
- >About an hour into the movie, there was some cheesy, sappy scene that made you roll your eyes.
- >Sure it’s sweet and all, but ugh, if you fast forward this, it'd be great.
- >Ditzy's hoof started to rub on your thigh, to catch your attention you assume.
- "Yeah?" you whisper to her.
- >"You sure you don't want any popcorn?"
- "I'm sure. Thanks."
- >"Mkay."
- >She continues to rub your right thigh absent-mindedly as the scene goes on.
- >You tug at your collar as the scene was starting to get a bit lewd.
- >One moan from Eris caught your boner's attention.
- >As it started to get stiff, Ditzy happens to rub her hoof a bit too close.
- >She turns her head to look at you, and a trouble making grin emerged on her face.
- >SHIT
- ---
- 13/19
- >"Ditz, what the hell was that earlier?"
- >You don't answer right away since the waitress was trotting by to give you your orders.
- >A stack of pancakes and an apple-cranberry salad lands on the table, you had to roll your eyes while you chuckle under your breath.
- >Of course Anon would order pancakes.
- >"Alrighty, anything else I can for you two love birds?"
- >"This town, I swear to God," he mumbles.
- "No, this will be all, thanks."
- >She nods then trots off.
- >Once she was far enough away, Anon shifts his attention to you.
- >"Ditzy, we need to have a talk."
- "Sure, what about?"
- >"About boundaries."
- "Mhm?"
- >"Why were you rubbing my lap in the movies?"
- "Ooh, that wasn't intentional."
- >"Really now?"
- "Mhm, was trying to get your attention so I can whisper in your ear if you wanted to come here afterward."
- >Anon leans in, his eyes narrowed and locked onto your face.
- >"Was that really it?"
- "Yup, promise."
- >"Oh, cool. I guess that's why you asked me after the movie, but did you need to whisper?"
- "That pony in front of us was--"
- >He puts his hand up to stop you.
- >"That guy was too liberal with the shushing, not to mention old, that might've made his day for all we know."
- >You crack a smile.
- "Why does that make so much sense?"
- >"Old folks love being miserable."
- "Hahaha, you think so?"
- >"Definitely, now as I was saying about boundaries..."
- "Right, anything else?"
- >"... There's really no chance you're gonna let go of the pants hanging thing is there?"
- "Nope, but enjoy the break while you can. You've got the weekend to look forward to."
- >"Oh right, you mean the getting up extra early to help Applejack tomorrow?"
- "You're eating pancakes and got to see a movie featuring Eris, my treat."
- >He bites his lip, and then nods humbly.
- >"Fair trade off now that I think about it. Hell, I'm still mind blown about Eris actual being in a film. Really gotta meet her one day."
- "She's taken."
- 14/19
- >"Whoa, easy there, Ditz," he replies, putting his hands up.
- >If it weren't for Anon's reaction, you would've never guessed your eyebrows were furrowed.
- >You put a hoof on your chest and swallow, while looking down at your salad.
- "Sorry, got a bit ummm..."
- >"Ditzy? You alright?"
- "Yeah, sorry. It's just I'm finally getting to know you, spending time and all y'know?"
- >"And you don't want to risk losing me, I get it."
- "That. Yes. It's not easy approaching you with mares like Lyra who flirt with all the time."
- >"Mares like Lyra? She's just... fuck how do I put this," he shifts his eyes to the ceiling, thinking of a word.
- >"Parched."
- "Oh... Oooooh."
- >"Yeah know what I mean?"
- "Just horny?"
- >"Most of them are. Personally if you ask me, the mares here are way too casual about their intentions and no one calls them out on it."
- "You always seem to be fine with it though.”
- >”That’s because it’s way too much fun turning down Lyra and the others and it’s a nice boost of confidence, sure.”
- “So, what do you think about me?”
- >”You have a more radical way of catching my attention, up there with Fluttershy, that’s for sure.”
- >You feel your cheeks burn.
- “How else was I supposed to get your attention? Remember the other day when I talked to you in here? You barely acknowledged me; you just kept eating your pancakes, said I was ‘doing a fine job’.”
- >”Ditzy, I was eating these godly pancakes at the time, you could rob me and I would still tell you the same thing. It’s all in the timing.”
- >You chuckle at the thought.
- “And what about now?”
- >”You have my attention.”
- 15/19
- >You lean back in your chair, sighing in relief while looking up to the ceiling.
- >An ear to ear smile on your face, you look toward the counter to make eye contact with the waitress that gave you the advice.
- “Thank you,” you whisper to her.
- >She gives you a wink and goes on about her work.
- >You turn back to Anon who’s now digging into his pancakes.
- ”So, Anon, tell me about what’s happening tonight.”
- >”Hmm? Oh yeah yeah. Congrats, you're doing a fine job.”
- “Anooon.”
- >You give him a gentle kick under the table.
- >He looks up at you, putting on a smirk.
- “Not funny!”
- >”Couldn’t help myself. So anyway about tonight...”
- ---
- 15.5/19
- [spoiler] fucking character limit[/spoiler]
- “Just no rowdy shit, alright?”
- >Dash’s wide eye stare signals that she didn’t comprehend anything.
- >Soarin on the other hand just shrugs and takes a swig from his beer.
- >”And WHY can’t we be rowdy? I thought that was the whole point of this.”
- “Dash, look. I’m all for getting wild and weird on the weekends, but not this time around. We’re doing Berry a favor.”
- >”Ugh, great. I don’t think I’ll have any money for bail this time.”
- “Hoh, no. Nothing like that, I was actually glad it was nothing illegal this time.”
- “So, get this. Berry’s bringing a date here tonight.”
- >”Ugh, okay?”
- “And she wants to make a good impression.”
- >”What? Are you kidding me? Do you remember the crap she pulled when I brought Vanilla Swirl here when I was dating him?”
- >You shrug your shoulders.
- “Well, Dash, in her defense, what kind of name is Vanilla Swirl for a stallion? Soarin, you wanna weigh in here?”
- >”Dash, the fella was pretty effeminate.”
- >Dash scoffs, “he was not! He was just raised differently!”
- “Okay Dash, I’ll give you a chance to present your case, so what happened to him?”
- >”We broke up some time ago,” Dash replies avoiding eye contact.
- “Because?”
- >”Turns out he was…”
- >Dash falls silent, shaking her head while she glares down at the counter.
- >”I need a drink.”
- “I got just the thing for you.”
- 16/19
- >You grab a tall glass and scoop some ice in it and place it on the bar.
- >Turning around, you grab a bottle of Gin, and some Coconut flavored white rum that’s a decent alternative to Malibu Rum.
- >Sometimes, ya gotta work with what you got.
- >You place them on the counter and turn back around to get a bottle of sweetened lime juice and a shot glass.
- >Using the shot glass, you pour an ounce of each into the tall glass with ice.
- >You walk to the mini-fridge to get some club soda then pour four ounces of it into the glass.
- >After that you slide it over to Dash.
- >”What is this?”
- “Thank me later.”
- >As you put the bottles liquor back on the shelf, you hear some hooves come down the stairs.
- >”Hey Anon, somepony’s at the door,” Ditzy says.
- “Alright, I’ll be right there.”
- >You walk around and from behind the bar and head for the stairs.
- >Ditzy follows you up the stairs, giggling to herself.
- >She’s probably checking you out, but whatever, you’ve got company.
- >You make to the front door and answer it, and your eyes behold the rowdiest pony in your group of drinking buddies.
- >You thought Berry Punch was bad, but you would’ve never guessed-
- “Don’t you have papers to grade?”
- >”Finished that a couple of hours ago. Lemme in.”
- >You step aside.
- “Come on in, don’t break anything.”
- 17/19
- >”What do you mean tone down the rowdiness? This is a joke right?”
- “Cheerilee-“
- >”Thank you! Somepony agrees with me, why should we have to ‘behave’ for Berry’s date?”
- >You have a sip of your beer and calm down for a moment.
- >God, why do mares have to be so hard-headed?
- “Because, Berry’s date is her boss.”
- >”Poor bastard,” Cheerilee says, shaking her head before having a sip of her Crooked Golf Cart.
- “That’s what I said. Again, she’s the last person that wants to tone down our usual fun, but let’s keep it tamed alright? This is arguably the most legal favor Berry will ever ask.”
- >”I guess, but if he’s effeminate-“
- >“Dash, let that go alright? There was enough low hanging fruit to feed a village for a month when you brought him here.”
- >You chuckle and give Soarin a fist bump.
- “Couldn’t have said it better myself.”
- >A series of bumps and thuds tumble down the stairs.
- >”Ow, I’m okay.”
- “Ah, hey Ditzy.”
- >She trots up to a barstool.
- “What do you think you’re doing?”
- >Before she could take her seat she shifts her wondering eye to the left and right briefly.
- >”Having a seat? So I can-“
- “Nope, you’re joining me. It’s time you learn a little bit about bartending.”
- >Rainbow Dash cracks up, slapping a hoof on the bar.
- >”Derpy? A bartender? C'mon Anon, the joke writes itself!”
- 18/19
- >You can see the look on Ditzy’s face that screams, ‘I don’t want to be here.’
- >But of course, since it’s your place, and since Dash is pulling her Top Cunt card early, you’ve got a means of giving her a dose of humility.
- >Plus, that was over the line. It irks you when folks fling doubts at others who try to improve themselves.
- “Hey Dash, what did you think about that drink I served you?”
- >She controls her laughing to answer the question.
- >”Actually, Anon, this is pretty awesome. What’s the name of it?”
- “Well the name of it reminded me a lot of your love life, Rainbow Dash: A Lost Cause.”
- >Dash jaw drops, Soarin and Cheerilee lean against each other while they cackle.
- >”Ouch, add one more body to the body toll,” Cheerilee manages to say between her fits of laughing.
- >Even Ditzy had a giggle.
- >”Did you literally just serve Rainbow Dash an insult?” Ditzy asks.
- “She had it coming. Now get back here,” you nod your head to the left to where she can get behind the bar.
- >She steps down from the barstool and trots around as you make eye contact with Rainbow Dash.
- “Dash.”
- >”What?” She asks through her teeth, doing her best to give you the evil eye.
- >Ha, she’s making the exact same face Rarity made when you got her to pay for wine at lunch the other day.
- “Don’t let me catch you insulting my bar-back again.”
- >”I’m proud of you Anon,” Cheerilee says. “Defending your mare is always admirable! So what’s going on? You two a couple yet?”
- >Ditzy opens her mouth to answer, but your raise your hand just in time.
- “Don’t answer that.”
- >”Mmm, taking charge like that is pretty hot, Anon.”
- >Cheerilee sips her drink with a trademark grin.
- “This fucking town, I swear to God.”
- 19/19
- End of part 3
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