Where The Past Rings True

* tenebrousPsycher PMs "Aelf" (Hello, there. Saw your post and wanted to talk to you about it.)
* lucidChthonia PMs tenebrousPsycher ( ...oh? Which post? )
* tenebrousPsycher PMs "Aelf" (Moral injury, doin things we do not ever want to do. Trauma. That post.)
* lucidChthonia PMs tenebrousPsycher ( Oh. )
* lucidChthonia PMs tenebrousPsycher ( What about it? )
* tenebrousPsycher PMs "Aelf" (Learning very personally how that feels.)
* lucidChthonia PMs tenebrousPsycher ( So. What did you fuck up that thoroughly? )
* lucidChthonia PMs tenebrousPsycher ( I mean, there has to be /something/. )
* tenebrousPsycher PMs "Aelf" (Did a thing. Thought it was the right thing. You see the Croak on worriedGranite?)
* lucidChthonia PMs tenebrousPsycher ( The what? )
* tenebrousPsycher has sent lucidChthonia link "Ribbit"!
* tenebrousPsycher PMs "Aelf" (It's a thing bobbedNonsense made. Ribbit.)
* lucidChthonia has followed link "Ribbit"!
* lucidChthonia PMs tenebrousPsycher ( So what am I looking for here? )
* tenebrousPsycher PMs "aelf" (Something about Corpse Fiesta and/or a banning.)
* lucidChthonia PMs tenebrousPsycher ( ...oh. )
* lucidChthonia PMs tenebrousPsycher ( It's probably not much for me to presume you were involved. )
* tenebrousPsycher PMs "Aelf" (Instrumental. And present when she died. Glitch class made it rather nasty.)
* lucidChthonia PMs tenebrousPsycher ( ...right, I shouldn't ask or otherwise we'll be here all day. Why are you asking about the way I feel, then? )
* tenebrousPsycher PMs "Aelf" (Heard some rumors here and there.)
* lucidChthonia PMs tenebrousPsycher ( ...rumors. Right. That's a very transparent excuse. Are you trying to commiserate? Is that a thing you're doing? )
* tenebrousPsycher PMs "Aelf" (Maybe. Augh, am horrible with this sort a thing.)
* lucidChthonia PMs tenebrousPsycher ( I assure you, I've gotten "you are not alone" /quite/ enough by now. But I'll listen, because that usually helps. )
* tenebrousPsycher PMs "Aelf" (Aha. Yeah. Suppose you might. Still got the sore ribs from. Well. And keep wondering if what we did was a really necessary thing. And then remembering the things that flew out a her modus. Heard about... stuff some folks did to doomed Time players. Didn't think to find /evidence/ of it.)
* tenebrousPsycher PMs "Aelf" (Fuck, don't want to goddamn hurt people.)
* lucidChthonia PMs tenebrousPsycher ( Congratulations, you've picked the wrong person to excuse you from blame. So this happened. What are you going to do to make it right? )
* tenebrousPsycher PMs "Aelf" (Have no excusing here. Difference between commiserating and absolution. But. Not much can make it right, far as can be seen from here.)
* lucidChthonia PMs tenebrousPsycher ( I can't help you with that. I'm on the same path. But I will tell you that dicking around in the Bubbles isn't the answer, and neither is screaming to the clouds of Skaia "why have you forsaken me", and pushing everyone you know and care about away isn't useful. Though it's tempting. )
* tenebrousPsycher PMs "Aelf" (Been talking to Mareya and Adam. Moirail when possible.)
* tenebrousPsycher PMs "Aelf" (Avoiding the memo for a few good reasons.)
* lucidChthonia PMs tenebrousPsycher ( Yes. Keep talking. You're trying to /uncover/ and figure out the /reasons/ for your mental state, even the unspoken assumptions about what makes a good person. You shouldn't be looking for a quick fix. )
* lucidChthonia PMs tenebrousPsycher ( The Designers of Sburb, as it were, didn't seem to /notice/ that they were making something that would traumatize someone. I've been looking, and apparently the vast majority of psybuffs are better against normal depression rather than well-founded guilt or anxiety or trauma. Which is stupid of them. )
* lucidChthonia PMs tenebrousPsycher ( A good freestyler might be able to cobble together something to help, though again, it's not going to be permanent, and it's not going to be fast. )
* tenebrousPsycher PMs "Aelf" (The Mind player is a wreck after his BT. Poor Wally. Personally psybuffed him. And don't want fast. Want to face things, not be numb.)
* lucidChthonia PMs tenebrousPsycher ( Good. That habit will serve you well. )
* tenebrousPsycher PMs "Aelf" (Have been fighting a fair bit a things, just going into this session. Even T e N  l couldn't stop the guilt after.)
* lucidChthonia PMs tenebrousPsycher ( Oh, a N llkid? That's a complication, but only insofar as it... when it's trying to protect you, I think it often erases things it shouldn't, because then they /stay/ unresolved, and then you have a hanging feeling with no visible cause. )
* lucidChthonia PMs tenebrousPsycher ( It's /trying/. But I don't think it's trying the right way. )
* lucidChthonia PMs tenebrousPsycher ( I have... I'm told I have some experience with such matters. I haven't been able to find out more. )
* tenebrousPsycher PMs "Aelf" (Dealt with it, faced it, knew that the BT wasn't my fault. I found out anyway. BT killed four a my session mates, tiered the Time player.)
* tenebrousPsycher PMs "Aelf" (For a long time, thought everyone died. Walked through the door alone.)
* tenebrousPsycher PMs "Aelf" (Due to cataclysm, he's still there.)
* lucidChthonia PMs tenebrousPsycher ( ...well. That's... more than I did, first session. Though the accusations afterwards were - )
<lucidChthonia> [That's still a raw wound, even after all these years. Technically you could say infected and festering, if you were honest with yourself.]
<lucidChthonia> [Which you are /trying/ to be.]
<lucidChthonia> [It doesn't work as well as you hope.]
* tenebrousPsycher PMs "Aelf" (It never went away, did it.)
* lucidChthonia PMs tenebrousPsycher ( - never mind. )
<lucidChthonia> [> Aelf: Hold your head in your hands. Try not to think about it. Fail repeatedly and spectacularly.]
<lucidChthonia> [Their voices are the same as the chorus from Pits, aren't they?]
<lucidChthonia> [...]
* lucidChthonia PMs tenebrousPsycher ( It's fine. Can we talk later? )
* tenebrousPsycher PMs "Aelf" (Would like that.)
* lucidChthonia has disconnected from the server!