A Perfect World....

Around me, the busy streets are loud with the sounds of people. Friends chatting with friends, couples walking together, parents dealing with rambunctious children...all things I no longer had.
...Or to be more precise, the 'Dwight Hatcher' from 'this side' never had any of these things.

It may seem strange to say this, but the life I live now was not one I had. Before, it was a life filled with suffering and tragedy. From the horrid things that my parents did to the murder games I had been forced to survive, my life was marred in tragedy. However, along with these tragedies came moments that made the weight of it all easy to bear.
The first blessing was the other Players. We were a group made up of different ages and experiences, yet the pain that we felt in the Game brought us together like a family. The pain of one of us was the pain of all of us and the joy of one of us was the joy of all of us.
The second blessing was the woman I would eventually be happy to call my wife, Arianne. Me and her had been together during most of the Game, and the two of us managed to ease the guilt that lingered in our hearts after that event.
Over the years, we were drawn together and eventually...well, that's my third blessing...or blessings, to be precise: Aurora and Regis. To say that they were the apple of my eye would be an understatement. Despite the struggles me and Arianne had at the beginning, we truly came to love our children.

“Good morning, Mr. Hatcher.”
I give a small nod to the secretary as I make my way to my cubicle. This monotonous job has nothing on the life I lived as an agent. Of course, how could the me of 'this side' ever know that life? My chance was given to me by a tragedy. A tragedy that no longer exists....

I think it would be best to explain what I mean by 'this side.' As I said, I lived a different life before this. To be specific, I lived in a world similar to this one, but at the same time greatly different. The world I lived in was one filled with sadness, tragedy, and loss. This world had none of the things that scarred our histories. How do I know this? Because a god came to me and the others and offered this world to us. He warned us that the lives we lived now would be drastically different than the ones here, but promised us that the tragedies we knew would never exist.
Believing that 'this side' would be the answer to the pain in our hearts, we all accepted the god's offer to enter 'this side' without a second thought. He told us that once we entered 'this side' we would never be able to return, because that god would have never existed in that world. We ignored his warning and told him to bring us here.

“I hope this world will give you the happiness you all desire.”

Those were his last words before everything went blank. Looking back now, I wish I could have rejected that offer...

###

I stroke my cat's fur slowly, the furball being the only company I have left. It's been almost a full week since I've left my house. Not like it matters much though. Food isn't an issue since I get groceries delivered every week, and money is a non-issue because the 'George Kaysen' of this world actually succeeded.
...It's odd being addressed as Kaysen again. Fifteen and a half years being called “George Bennett” does that, I guess. I still sometimes run my thumb along my ring finger in the hopes that somehow, him and I really were still together. But the truth is far more colder than that. After a bit of research, it seems in this world he and Abby managed to get together. I wish I could see when they got together in this world, but I can't bring myself to look at their pictures because I break down into tears every time I try.
But I guess that's to be expected. Our relationship was built on the suffering we experienced. A suffering that no longer existed....
Though I wonder...does he ever think of me? I mean, he still has the memories we built together. Maybe, when he's alone in the night, he thinks of when him and I would lie together, holding one another.
...or maybe I'm just being too optimistic. After all, he's finally with the woman who adored him as much as he did her.
“At least, I still have you Diana.”
“Miaou.”

###

It's hard to sit next to the woman who ruined so many lives on the 'other side.' But at the same time, I have a hard time believing they are one and the same. After all, the Marie of my world was cold, unloving, abusive, and power-hungry. But this one...
“C'mon Arianne, there's no harm bringing your husband over. Me and your father just want to meet him.”
She actually cares about me....about Raimie...and...
“Mom, dad, I'm home.”
Him. It's hard to believe that the morbid talisman she wore on the 'other side' was actually this baby-faced boy. As soon as he sees me, he hides behind Marie. It seems the 'me' of this side always played tricks on this poor boy. If only the 'Arianne' of this world knew what could have been of her brother.
“I guess I'll think about it....m-mother...”
It's hard to call her that. It's even harder to call the strange man I found myself now married to as my husband. He isn't bad, per se. It's very clear that that man loves me with every fiber of his being, but he just isn't like Dwight.
He might have been a bit stupid, and far too cautious to do any good, but spending years with him made those traits endearing. There's also the fact that he was there for me at my most vulnerable, something this new husband of mine could never claim to do.
I feel rather guilty. I have a loving family and spouse yet I feel it isn't enough. I guess now I understand why that god warned us. Those tragedies may have cost lives, but at the same time those events changed us, they made us grow and become the people we were.
I wish I could go back to that sad world. At least then, I wouldn't feel this guilt...

###

“Sure you'll be ok, Dwight?”
“'f course. I jus'had a few drinks. I can get 'ome. Hic...”
I was never fond of alcohol on the 'other side' but the me of this world seems to have a high tolerance to it. But with the ache in my chest, I guess this is really the only comfort I have.
We were so stupid. We thought things would be the same or even better if we removed those tragedies from our histories, but we never realized the things those events did to us. The people those tragedies had us meet. The love that blossomed in that grief.
Yes, this world is a pure one. But none of us really reached a 'happy ending' here.

I stagger through the dark streets, a vague sense of where I was going.
“I miss Ari...and Aurora...and Regis...and Tanya...and the rest....”
Through the fog of alcohol, memories of those lost days flash by. By the time I recall my kids' birth I can't help but collapse into a sobbing mess. I wish I could take it all back. I want my imperfect world back! I want my old life back!

*honk*honk*
I raise my head and see a pair of bright headlights charging towards me. With me like this, there's no hope that I'll move out of the way. A bitter smile spreads on my lips. I always imagined my death would be much more spectacular, or much more peaceful. But here I was, about to be struck by a truck in the middle of god-knows-where with no friends, no loved ones....nothing.
I should be afraid, yet my heart is steady. With nothing to do, I close my eyes and await the inevitable impact...

###

It feels like I'm falling. But at the same time it feels as if something is holding me steady. Opening my eyes, I find myself in a vast void filled with strange glowing webs. Before me, or us to be precise, is the very god that had brought us to the new world.
“I hope you all had fun living that life for a while.” He said with a  cocky grin.
“It was miserable,” Hector said, “Despite getting something I wished for, I couldn't shake off how wrong it felt to me, especially when deep down that I no longer wanted that.”
“I'd smother you in kisses right now if I could move!” George yelled from his position.
“It was nice living my old life,” Gabe was now the one talking, “But comparing that life to the life I lived in our world...”
“It just doesn't compare, does it love? Especially when you're all alone.” Maria finished for him.
“Meeting everyone here was the greatest gift I ever had.” Tanya began, “Even if I had the love of a partner in this world, it didn't match with the love of my friends or those I viewed as family.”
“I also realized how happy I already was, even if things weren't perfect.” I felt a hand grab hold of mine. I turned and, lo and behold, Arianne stood next to me. I felt tears form on the brim of my eyes from the sheer joy of seeing that smile of hers again.”
“Yes, even if it was imperfect, I wouldn't trade that world for any other. Not now, not ever again.”
The god smiled at my response, “I'm glad to hear that. Now then, one last question: Do you wish to return to your old lives or do you wish to remain here.”
“I think our answer is obvious.” Tanya said with a smile, “This world may be perfect in the strict sense, but nothing will ever match the world where we made our own happy endings!”
“Very well then. Then please close your eyes.”
We did as he asked. Suddenly, I felt my body become light as a strong current from below pushed me and Arianne upwards. As we rose, the sensation in my body began to vanish until I could feel nothing. However, through the darkness I heard that god's voice.
“Now, do you remember the lives you lived? Do you remember whose voices call to you...?”

““Mom, dad, time to wake up!””
The next thing I knew, it was dawn...