Injury: yerrrr
Lucilius: ??
Injury: Yo i ask this chat be kept between us because im bout to get real vulnerable and gon let you beat my shit #pause.
Injury: you said something earlier that i'm curious about
Lucilius: and that would be?
Injury: You said people will pin things on me easily because of the shady things i've done in the past. From my memory, i've always been open with things i've done. Now i am trying to be a better person since i have some presence in the internet world that is growing. But other than that, i'm tired my dude. Shit was real rough before it got better, like.....to the point where i was in a mental hospital for a week and a half , niggas dont know that but i did get help because shit was gettin to me too much from rl and online. So i do want to know what you meant so i can work on it or at least recognize what i did.
Lucilius: shady/trashy*
Injury: yuh
Lucilius: its more so trashy then shady. Im not one for talking shit about people regardless of who it is unless they have blatently done something to wrong me or someone close to me. All you've gotta do is look back on that past you that was just an asshole, which is what I meant. Theres always gunna be that one person thats gunna recount it and tell everyone else what a piece of shit you used to be or make the remember thats how you used to be. Its why the phrase karma is a bitch exist. Gotta be mindful of how you treated all those people from your past and present day. Hence mei could literally spout foolishness about you and people would believe it because thats just how you acted in the past so anyone else that knew you back then and doesnt care for you now or wont bother to care for you now is going to believe whatever anyone says. So yea you're trying to be a better person and so on but you can never really take back your words people commit those to memory is all. So thats what I meant when I said it. Hell if I didn
Lucilius: If i didnt know you now and someone were to tell me about the whole SoL thing (even though I was there an saw it) I'd almost be inclined to believe you and james did some underhanded shit during someones time of struggle. So just think about it like that~
Injury: Hm.
Injury: I only mistreat those who do me wrong and those who try to come for me. Not to say i'm a victim, but i've learned over the years that anyone willing to come for you when they do not know you, won't back down if you give in. I'm prideful, i've admitted that. i actually have a list for myself pre-drama, during the recent-ish drama, and after. Reflection pretty much. I get very defensive because i have lost everyone in the past, but i also do not like being seen as a victim. Lies get people places for awhile, but will drag them down eventually. Those who think of me as an asshole are right to think that, i was an asshole, i joked way too much , was much too blunt, and didn't really give a fuck for how people felt, only because that's the way i was treated for over 10 years on here. But i can only hope to be better i guess.
Injury: Ka'yen has known me throughout my entire time on imvu
Part 2:
Lucilius: weba
Injury: ty
Injury: computer restarted
Injury: last i read was about that's smite's mistake
Lucilius: ye dudes got a pretty shit life from what II understand which is why he acts the way he does
Injury: i mean my real life is litty titty dont me wrong, my family was just on my ass continuously for a year
Injury: zz
Injury: i'll put it this way: all i really have is my mother at this point.
Injury: i cut off the rest of my family in september
Lucilius: aint nothing wrong with that
Injury: which coincided with the google doc
Lucilius: take it from someone who went from living with 3 people to living by himself
Injury: and i lost my bestfriend of 7 years the same month.
Injury: he didnt die or nothin, the nigga is just a shady cunt.
Injury: like pathological liar n' shit
Injury: i had people on here calling me a liar for shit i wasnt lying about or shit i didn't even do for that matter. then i had this negro and a huge twitch community trying to outcast me and call me a liar for telling the 100% truth, receipts and all. and i guess that's why i learned quickly that niggas are the same...
Injury: they will lie to save their own asses, but look foolish regardless
Injury: i came back strong AF on twitch, team and all.
Lucilius: which is why I don't bother. I like to say i just exist -shrug- better to just be then make an issue for yourself
Injury: As i told ryan a couple days ago, the way i see people like mayzie and taylor....unfortunately i see them as below me. that's just me though, people can tell me otherwise
Injury: but i look at the scales
Injury: i provide entertainment to a couple hundred people a week
Injury: make them laugh, feel good, listen to their issues, give them advice, play some games and chill.
Injury: even have some people write me letters in my twitter dm's telling me how me talking to them made them want to live another day and all that.
Injury: shit like that put me in a better mood, that shit healed me FR
Lucilius: long as you doing you is the important part~
Injury: then there's people like taylor, who has been msging me on kik since october trying to taunt me, just found that out yesterday when i reinstalled.
Injury: just why?
Injury: is she that desperate for something to pop off?
Injury: im not giving her that satisfaction personally, but it just makes me wonder why tf people are like that shit.
Injury: im an asshole on here, whether i mean to be or not, but i will never purposely put someone down because we had a falling out , unless they continuously come for me and impact my rl. Whic hthey havent done that yet thankfully. So i don't understand this mentality of "lets keep fucking with him because we think we won"
Lucilius: just let them talk, you think that whole ordeal with tyler really bothered me?
Injury: no not really
Injury: it was him shit talking someone who he was obviously scared of
Lucilius: And the only reason it didnt was because it was pretty clear where everything was gunna go -shrug-
Lucilius: not even sure why he was shit talking in the bleach group :c
Injury: speaking of tyler , he is angry again.
Injury: not at you
Injury: zz
Lucilius: ginto gun that doesn't even work if ya aint castin spells
Injury: i spoke to him 4 days ago
Lucilius: he's the mos toxic nigga in existence son
Injury: im not aware of that.
Injury: now*
Injury: Tyler is someone who really just doesnt give a shit how you feel unless it's towards him
Injury: not to shit talk but he is a bit of a sociopath
Injury: but he will listen to you if you ask him to not do something
Lucilius: oh ya aint gotta tell me
Lucilius: thats why he gets the way he does with me. I out sociopath him :c If you're gunna be one you honestly do have to be apathetic and he can only go so far but you could be telling me my moms about to roll over and die. I'd probably still not give two shakes of my dick
Lucilius: you're right though he'll listen if you ask'em not to
Injury: i work like this: i will give a shit about something for long enough until i get angry, when i get angry i bottle it in or express it, depending on the situation. after about a week, i kill it in myself, people bringing it up just makes me cringe in all honesty, it'll be in my head for an hour and then disappear again. I don't need to get my way, but closure is nice. I'm someone who wont show my emotions to you unless i give a shit, and if i give a shit and you still shun me, i will want nothing to do with you. Doesn't mean i have anything against the person, i just will want nothing to do with them.
Injury: Unlike most people who believe in forgiveness. I forgive a set number of times before you just become an ant to me.
Injury: that's conceited , i know, but i honestly have learned to not care about that part of myself.....i'm conceited, it's just who i am.
Injury: like i said , i care for others until they shun me, then i give them an opportunity to make up for it, if they dont want to take it , that's on them.
Injury: that opportunity is usually talking to me 1 on 1 and settling shit.